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Reviewer: mamogirl Signed [Report This]
Date: 04/12/15 09:42 pm Title: Chapter 1

You're my favorite person right now.
This story is so amazing and just too good. I'm in love with the way you describe Brian, I think it's so perfect and so fit the conflict with his religion and who he has became. It's the kind of angst that always shatteres me because it's so good. lol
And I love how, in the end, Nick's different from the other ones. Nick's the only one for Brian and the end just made me smile so big!
I actually don't know what to else to say because I really really loved it. It's one of those stories that I'm gonna read over and over again. And on of those stories who just makes me feel like I will never be able to write something like this.

Thank you for writing in this fandom. Thank you for writing slash. *__*

Author's Response: sadfj;lk This made me so, so happy, seriously. Yesterday was awful at work and I'm sick and this was just an absolutely wonderful window of happiness in this midst of all that, haha XD There was so much I wanted to do with this idea that I feel like there's a lot here I didn't spend as much time with as I wish I could have, and one of those is the struggle Brian goes through with his religion after what happens to him. I'm really glad that stood out for you, even if I didn't get to go as much into it as I would have if this had been longer. One of my first thoughts when I was planning all this was how hard it would be for Brian to adjust to a life where he knew he literally HAD to kill people to get by, to have the instinct to do so such a strong part of him that it becomes something he wants. I knew if he was ever to come to terms with he'd have to have rules for himself, have to go after people he saw as dangerous or evil in some way so he feels like he's in some way a force for good. I got to show that a little with the moment they come to AJ's defense but I kind of wish I'd put another scene like that in there, show him doing the best he can with a difficult situation. (...and also, because he's Brian, I feel he'd still carry a lot of guilt even then, because he wants to believe in the good in people, doesn't always like that he's put himself in a position where he judges others and deals out life and death.)

I'm also really glad you liked the end, :D I went back and forth on how I wanted meeting Nick to go for a long time but I finally decided it had to happen like this, because I didn't want to take away that dynamic of the two of them being best friends and brothers first. I wanted to show how deep that bond goes, that even though in this world all five of them are meant to be together and in love with each other, there's something with Nick and Brian that's unique and just a little tighter and closer than anything else.

...I need to stop because I could ramble about this world for a long long time lmao I really did love this universe though so who knows, maybe eventually I'll write something more from here, go back and hit a few of the scenes I had in my head that didn't make it into this one...I'll have to see. Anyway, thank you so much for this; there's nothing better for a writer to hear than that someone loved their fic and everything you said just made my day. :D :D :D