Prologue

-- Germany, Late March 2008 --

I couldn't believe my luck. I had drawn the short straw again. The tour bus was sitting on the side of the road and I was the dumb schmuck that had been thrown outside in the cold to stomp through a damn forest in search of a gas station.

The shoestrings on my sneakers had come untied about five minutes ago, but I had been too lazy (and admittedly scared) to stop and tie them. I felt like I was being watched. My breath came out in quick, sporadic puffs. My pulse throbbed in my ear.

I walked a little faster.

Every sound was magnified around me. My right foot snapped a twig in half. Something rustled in a bush behind me.

"Holy--" I muttered. I sped up a little more. I ducked underneath a spiderweb.

The sun had disappeared about a half hour ago. A large yellow moon was drifting up in the night sky. It was a full moon. I shivered. My hoodie suddenly didn't seem near as warm as it did when J had pushed me down the bus steps.

I missed the days when we could afford private jets and busses so fancy that we could have had 24-karat gold toilet seats if we wanted them. Instead, Howie, AJ, and I were crammed onto one bus while Team Littrell coasted in semi-comfort in the other bus. We had gotten separated; our driver was new and didn't speak a lick of English. Team Littrell had taken the right ramp. Team Dumb-shits had gotten lost in what appeared to be a dark Grimms Fairytale.

"It's okay," I said to myself. I crunched another twig. "I'll find a gas station. I'll get a Snickers bar. Maybe they make 'em with German chocolate here. I'll--"

I paused. The feeling that I wasn't alone intensified. My chest constricted. All around me the trees surrounded me with a black velvet of heavy hung leaves. Even though I was cold, a thin line of sweat trickled from my hairline.

My fight or flight instinct kicked in. I chose flight. I took off, running out of my sneakers in the process. The socks were no match for the rough forest floor. I felt ever little poke of a branch or sharp jab of a rock. But I didn't stop.

The terrifying growl from behind me was solid proof that I had become a target. A bear or some other large, vicious forest creature wanted a slab of Nick Carter for dinner. The thought caused a bone-chilling scream to erupt from my mouth.

Whatever was behind me was faster than me. Much faster. I swung around a tree and barely missed a low-hung branch. I leaned forward and put forth a burst of speed. I felt like my heart was going to tear right ouf of my chest. My eyes filled with cold sweat. I thought I could see something, perhaps a little light up ahead. Maybe...maybe I would get to a road. Maybe...

My sock caught on something sharp. An intense pain tore through the bottom of my foot. I lunged forward and hit the hard packed dirt. My nails clawed at the bare earth. The heavy sound of fast approaching feet echoed all around.

The thing was on me in no time. The smell made me nauseous. It was a combination of wet hair, blood, and savagery. I rolled on my back and stared up. I almost passed out right then.

It wasn't a bear. It wasn't a wolf. I had never seen anything like it in real life. The thing I was looking at was only supposed to exist in the movies. A huge glob of saliva dripped from its mouth. I could see the reflection of the moon in its yellow eyes. It sniffed my body; I was frozen in terror. There was a pause and then the head flew back and a loud, excited howl rent the air. I staggered backward. It sensed my movement. It wasted no time.

The sharp claws tore my shirt and flesh as if they were one. My body went into instant shock; strangely enough, my body temperature soared so high I was sure my skin was melting. My own blood dripped over my fingers. As I began to shake, there was a vague realization that I was being dragged.

My head bounced helplessly; my jaw was slack. The last thing I remember is the sight of the big round moon turning red.

Blood red.

Chapter One

-- Latin America, March 2009 --

"Why is it that every time we even mention South America to you, you get out your pancho?"

"The senoritas love my pancho," I explained. "It's tradition. I've done it since Black & Blue."

Howie shook his head. Then he hugged me. He had been doing a lot of that lately - hugs, I mean. Leigh's pregnancy hormones were rubbing off on him. He had become less like Yosemite Sam and more like Tweety Bird. And the wink was coming back out in full force.

"Just don't trip in that thing," he warned (and winked). I snorted. If I was tripping, he was going to be my target.

I loved being a giant amongst short men.

"So the ladies love your pancho, huh?"

Howie turned, saw the look on Lauren's face, and took off, no doubt to make sure his mother hen was still sitting on their egg. That was the kind of stupid analogy he had used all tour. If the kid came out with feathers, then I'd be interested. I smiled at my girlfriend.

"It's all about the image," I reminded her. She rolled her eyes.

Lauren had been one of the best things to ever happen to me. We had started off as friends, hitting the gym, getting some fro-yo, and then things had just kinda happened from there. She wasn't money-hungry; her daddy was fuckin' loaded. She wasn't star-struck; she saved that type of lust for one of those princes over across the pond.

It was the perfect relationship.

"You're sweating," she remarked.

I ran the back of my hand over my forehead. It was soaked. I made a face. "I can't turn my friggin' sweat glands off," I complained.

"Maybe if you weren't wearing a wool pancho, you'd be cooler," she teased.

I tore the thing off. The warm air hit my bare arms; a white tank top and jeans were all I had on. Even without the pancho, I could feel the sweat beading up, ready to drip down.

"Are you getting sick?" she asked. I shook my head. "Naw, it's just the humidity," I lied.

She kissed me quickly. "I'm going to go chill out with Rochelle before the show," she said. I nodded. She gave my bicep a gentle squeeze and headed out of the dressing room.

I headed towards the showers. I couldn't recall how many showers a day I'd been taking lately, but I knew it was way more than I had ever taken in my life.

I yanked my shirt over my head. As I undid my belt, I glanced at my reflection.

For years, I had bugged Brian about his sensitivity of showing off his chest. He hated the light scar that ran down his body; it was a lasting reminder of his heart surgery. Now I knew his pain. Three angry jagged lines zigged diagionally across my chest. The skin was puckered and pink.

It wasn't fair; for once in my life I had a six pack, and I couldn't even show it off.

On the other hand, the doctors had told me I was lucky to be alive. I don't remember much about the night. The fear - yeah I remember the fear. And the claw. The doctors explained that I had encountered a large grey wolf. Their food supply was in short demand that time of year, and I had been an enticing dinner.

No one could really tell me how I survived. You would think if I was dinner, there would have been more than scratches. It was a miracle that Brian's bus had been traveling that road, headed back to our own stranded bus with gasoline. They had almost run me over. At first they thought I was road kill, but Brian said his 'sixth sense' had kicked in. I just think he knows my body more than he'd ever actually admit.

We're metrosexual like that.

I had been in the hospital for a week. I would have been released sooner, but they couldn't get my temperature down. Finally, with no other apparent sign of illness, they had no choice but to let me go.

The wounds healed, but the scars remained.

Turning from the mirror, I kicked off my jeans and started the shower. I was the only freak that loved ice cold showers. It was the one thing that could cool me off.

"Ohh," I moaned in delight as the cold spray tickled my shoulders. I hunched over and let the water run down my back.

I ran my hand across my face, wiping away the sweat. I stood for a few minutes, eyes closed, just enjoying the sensation. I rubbed the back of my neck to release the stress that was building.

That's when I felt them. I paused and did it again. Coarse hairs, not like the ones at the nape of my neck.

Five minutes later, Brian walked in on me. I was holding a tiny hand mirror, leaning to and fro trying to see my backside. When I did get a momentary glimpse, I started to sweat all over again.

"Whatcha doin'?" Bri asked. He grinned.

There are very few people that I trust explicitly. Brian was one of them. I suddenly felt like I had fallen into an episode of Family Guy.

"Bri," I said awkwardly. "I need you to shave me."

His eyes widened. "Shave you? Now wait a minute--"

I sighed and turned around. "Woah," I heard.

"Yeah."

"What did you do? Subscribe to Body Hair Club for Men?"

"I don't know. It's just there and I'm hot."

"I disagree. Women don't find hairy men hot."

"BRI!"

Brian started to laugh. I whirled around.

"Are you gonna help me or not?" I asked. "I can't reach."

Bri looked around. "I can't believe some of the things we do."

I held out my razor. "It's not like I'm asking you to shave my balls," I said.

"Good, because there's no way in hell I'm going there. That's Lauren's job."

You can imagine how awkward the scene was. I was butt naked leaning up against the wall. Bri was trying to keep his distance, but there's only so much distance you can have if you're trying to shave hair off a person's neck and back.

"This hair feels weird," Brian commented.

"It must be one of the supplements I'm taking," I said.

"What's it called? Vitamin WolfMan?"

I started to laugh, but the sound lodged in my throat. I stared down at my chest.

Grey wolves. Germany. Forest. Hair on my back. Sweat.

Could it be?

"There ya go," Bri said. "You so owe me."

I turned around and grabbed the razor. Coarse hairs still stuck out from it.

"Thanks," I said. Bri tore off his shirt.

"You're done with your shower right? I don't think I can shower with you after shaving ya. I've hit my man-on-man quota for the day."

I smiled distractedly. "Right."

I grabbed my clothes while Bri stripped down. I got to the door just as the shower turned on.

A bead of sweat was already dripping down my cheek.

Chapter Two

"I'm starving."

"What's new?"

Eight of us were huddled in the hotel lobby: Lauren, myself, Howie, preggo Leigh, Brian, Leighanne, AJ, and Rochelle. Our after-show dynamic had changed dramatically. I was sober, AJ was trying to stay sober, Leigh couldn't party, and Brian was crazy enough without being drunk.

But we were all able to eat.

"What does everyone feel like?" Bri asked. Leighanne snuggled up to him. Baylee was zonked out upstairs. Someone from the Littrell entourage was watching him.

"Chicken," J said.

"Burrrrrrrritos," Brian said. He rolled his R high to holy hell.

"Steak," I said. Even the word made my mouth water.

"You guys realize it's almost midnight, right?" Leigh asked. Happy Howie winked at her.

"Never fear. I know a place."

It was a good thing D knew a place. There was nothing written in English. I only knew a few words in Spanish - cheese, bathroom, and about six curse words. 'Steak' was a little beyond me.

The place D knew was close to the hotel. We walked in a group, security flanking us. All of the pretty senoritas that were smart enough to track us down followed along, rambling so fast that it sounded like they weren't saying anything at all. It was more like one long continuous screech.

"Chicken, burritos, steak," D said happily. He turned and winked. I so wanted to sneak into his hotel room some morning, run a thin line of superglue on his lid and watch his reaction when he performed the first wink of the day.

Even though it was late, the restaurant was packed. That was one thing I loved about South America. People treated the nights like Americans treated their days. Siestas took place around noon; parties began at midnight.

A couple waitresses worked to push two tables together. We were seated admist a shitload of fanfare. I sat down and rubbed my back against the chair. An itch had started about a half hour before. I ran a hand along my neck. It was soaked again.

"Didn't you take a shower after the show?" Lauren asked.

"Of course I did," I said with a scowl.

"I can vouch for that. I've never seen a bigger, whiter ass," J said with a snicker. He leaned back in his chair, a cigarette held lightly between his fingers.

"Could we not talk about Nick's bottom?" Bri said. He shook the menu.

"Bottom?" J said. He snorted. "Damnit, just say ass."

"Tequila," Howie said. I looked up. A waitress was standing to Leigh's right, a notepad in hand.

"I'll second the tequila," Brian said.

"Pina colada," I said. I had six pairs of eyes on me. Lauren wasn't the type to get all up my ass on shit. She was studying the menu calmly. I knew that she already knew what I was going to say. "Virgin," I finished.

AJ ordered a Coke. Even virgin drinks were too much temptation for him. Rochelle ordered some girly drink that I was sure was going to come back with a red umbrella in it.

As everyone started to talk, I rubbed up against my chair again. The itch was driving me nuts; it was in that annoying spot where your fingers just couldn't reach. I growled in frustration.

"What's wrong with you tonight?" Lauren asked. I hunched forward.

"I've got an itch," I said.

"Where?"

I motioned towards the spot. Her long nails scratched way too low.

"Higher," I said. She didn't move up far enough. "Higher," I said.

When her nails hit the spot it felt so amazing I almost shook my leg. Instead, I just moaned. She stopped long before the itch was satisfied.

"It's still--"

"Nick," Lauren whispered. I looked at her. Her forehead was creased in confusion.

"What?" I whispered back.

"There's something on your back."

I rolled my eyes. "You're crazy."

"But--"

"Carter! Whatcha want to eat?"

Lauren and I both looked up. For some strange reason, I caught a strong whiff of her shampoo. It smelled good. The waitress was smiling at us. Lauren ordered a light rice dish. I glanced back at the menu.

"Steak," I said.

"Filete," Howie translated.

The waitress said something. Howie glanced at me.

"How do you want that done?"

"Rare," I said.

"Filete raro," Howie said. The waitress continued around the table. When she was gone, Leighanne spoke first.

"Rare steak?"

"Will the thing still be mooing when it gets to the table?" Brian asked.

"Just sip your tequila, twinkle toes," I said. "Rare steak is good for you."

"On what planet?" J asked.

Lauren looked up. I smiled. J had done it now. Lauren started to explain about the virtues of eating red meat.

While J was getting lectured, D and Bri had initiated a standing order on tequila. I saw Howie count to three on his fingers; they both tipped their shot glass back, quickly grabbed a lime and sucked it within an inch of its life. Bri shook his head and laughed. He held out a shot to Leighanne. She shook her head, but she ended up taking it.

The east side of the table was well on its way to getting da-runk.

My virgin pina colada was good, but somehow it didn't pack the punch like the real deal. I lifted the straw a little and sloshed it through the glass. At least it was cold. The drink practically evaporated the moment it hit my mouth.

"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

I looked up. Bri was pointing at a large plate. The waitress set it down in front of me.

The steak took up most of the plate. Surrounding it were steamed vegetables. A little pink pick sticking out of the meat reconfirmed that it was indeed rare. I grabbed my steak knife and cut in; blood gushed out, quickly spreading to the vegetables.

My pulse throbbed. I lifted a meaty hunk and put it in my mouth.

I had never tasted anything better; it was like I had never eaten before in my life. The knife clattered against my plate. I tore my fingers in viciously and picked up a hunk. I tossed the bite in my mouth, greedily sucking the blood that was sliding underneath my nails.

"Nick?"

The voice sounded garbled; like I was underwater. I tore at the steak, shoveling down another mouthful.

"NICK!"

This voice was much louder. I jumped. Lauren's eyes were wide.

Everyone was looking at me.

"Wha?" I asked thickly.

"What the hell are you doing to that steak?" J asked.

I looked down at my plate. The thing was torn to shreds. I felt a little bit of blood dribble down my chin. My hands were covered in juice.

"I--uh---"

I had no explanation.

Chapter Three

"Nick, are you sure you're okay?" Lauren called out.

"I'm fine!"

Dinner had been awkward, to say the least. My stomach was still growling; I could have eaten three more steaks if I had gotten the chance. Instead, I had practically licked my plate and spent the rest of the meal relatively quiet, scratching my back against the chair any chance I could.

I studied my reflection in the mirror. I looked tired. I grabbed the bottom of my shirt and pulled it up over my head. My eyes widened.

My chest was covered with hair. It wasn't just any hair; it was the same coarse hair Brian had shaved off of me. The hair was so plentiful that I couldn't even see the scars from the attack. I wiped at the sweat that beaded up along my hairline. My eyes dropped to the sink. I picked up Lauren's hand mirror. My stomach twisted nervously.

I had a bad feeling about what I was about to do. Taking a deep breath, I turned around and held the mirror up. I needed to see what was irritating my back. I twisted my wrist, my eyes trained on the reflection.

What I saw almost made me scream.

There was a protrusion of bone underneath my skin. The skin itself had coarse hair poking out at odd angles; the area was red and irritated.

"Are you coming to bed?" Lauren called out.

I sputtered. "I-in a minute!" I screeched.

I put down the mirror and paced the small hotel bathroom. I turned on the faucet and splashed ice cold water across my face.

My mind whirled. Something was very wrong with me. I vowed that I would wake up early in the morning and find a doctor. It seemed like every time we toured Latin America, something happened to me. Usually it was just wicked runs or a skin-blistering sunburn.

This topped the cake.

I tugged my shirt back on and kicked off my jeans. My legs looked normal. I took a couple deep breaths to calm myself down. My stomach growled again.

"Nick!"

I sighed. I couldn't stay locked in the bathroom all night. I unlocked the door and walked back into the bedroom.

"You okay?"

My eyes devoured the sight that was sprawled along the bed. It was all legs and a little nightie that was so transparent it left nothing to the imagination. A perfect smile lit up Lauren's face. Her hair was down, falling lightly over her shoulders.

"What's this?" I asked.

"You looked so stressed today. I just thought I'd help you unwind."

My thoughts raced. My libido roared happily. The rest of me stayed back. Lauren's version of unwinding required nakedness. My body was sprouting hair faster than a Chia pet. I rubbed the back of my neck. Soaked.

"Babe?"

Lauren's forehead creased. She sat up; her breasts squeezed together. I practically salivated.

"I like this," I said. I motioned towards the little scrap of lace covering her body. She laughed.

"I figured you would."

I was stalling; I needed a plan. Turning down sex would solidify Lauren's assumption that something was wrong. I didn't want to freak her out about...about...this. I exhaled. My suitcase was sitting open on a chair near the bed. A couple of my ties were hanging over the edge.

"You've been naughty," I said slowly. I felt Lauren's eyes on me as I walked over to my case and pulled out the ties. She slid back on the bed.

Once her hands were tied, I relaxed a little bit. If she couldn't run her nails down my back, she wouldn't find the huge hunk of bones that shouldn't be there. I was going to have to keep on my shirt, but hopefully I could distract her enough that it wouldn't be a big deal.

Ten minutes later, Lauren was successfully naked and distracted. I felt like a total geek in my sweaty t-shirt. I licked down her slender stomach. For some reason, just the scent of her skin was driving me nuts. I could sense her blood drumming south as she anticipated me.

Suddenly, even though I knew that she was talking dirty to me, I couldn't comprehend what she was saying. My mind was ceasing to multi-task. Only one thought was pounding strongly over and over again. My nostrils flared.

I had to have her.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The sun was streaming through the sheer curtains when I woke up the next day. I stretched, my arms reaching towards the ceiling. I opened my mouth, yawning loudly. My head rolled lazily to the right.

The bed beside me was empty.

Last night was a little hazy. I remembered dinner. I remembered coming back to the room. I vaguely remembered the feel of Lauren's warm body under mine.

I swung my feet over the side of the bed. I grabbed my boxers and slid them up over my hips. My hand ran over my stomach. I paused. With a clammy wash of dread, I lifted my shirt.

The hair. I had forgotten about my hair. There wasn't an inch of skin uncovered.

"Oh my God," I whispered. I let the shirt fall; I walked towards the bathroom feeling lightheaded.

The bathroom door was closed. I pushed it open slowly. Soft whimpers tickled my eardrums.

Lauren was leaning on the sink. Her head turned slowly; she was pale. I gasped.

Large angry bruises ran up her arms and down her legs. Her hair was matted into large clumps. Dried tear trails zigged down her cheeks.

"What happened?" I asked. She quickly looked away. The silence irritated me.

"Lauren, what happened?" I repeated.

"You," she whispered.

"Me?" I said. I felt myself grow even warmer. "I would never--"

"Something's wrong with you," she said. She let go of the sink; she was shaking. She took a step forward and winced.

"What did I do?"

I followed her out of the bathroom. Every step she took seemed to be agony. She reached her suitcase and began to throw things inside. My heart raced.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm leaving."

"You can't!"

She paused, but she didn't turn around. It was as if she couldn't bare to look at me.

"You weren't yourself last night. You attacked me. And your body--"

She trailed off. She let loose a full-body shiver.

"Is it the hair?" I asked. "I don't know wh--"

"I don't know anything about hair," she said thickly. "You're just...swollen. And strong."

She picked her suitcase up gingerly. The tank top and shorts she was wearing did nothing to hide her battered body.

"Lauren, I don't know what's going on," I pleaded. "Please stay. I'm going to the doctor and--"

"I can't be around you. You--you almost killed me," she said. I knew from the tone of her voice that she wasn't exaggerating. I could practically smell her fear. She slowly made her way to the door. I was incapable of moving; it was as if I was frozen in place.

"But I love you," I said brokenly.

"I--" Lauren said. She shook her head. She opened the door. It closed loudly behind her.

The emptiness overwhelmed me. I sat down on the floor and glanced down. The coarse hair was slowly spreading up my legs.

I hunched forward.

And I howled.

Chapter Four

"What can I help with today?"

The doctor's English was thick and halted. I was dying underneath my hooded sweatshirt. I had managed to get out of the hotel undetected. After an agonizingly long wait in a crowded room, a skinny little nurse had shown me into the eight-by-eight cinderblock room I was currently sitting in. I was irritable; I was scared.

I wanted answers.

"It started a day or so ago," I said uncertainly. "This hair..."

I struggled with my jean leg. The hair was fighting the upward motion of the denim. The doctor crouched down; he brushed his fingers over the growth. The look of amazement on his face didn't give me hope.

"Where else?" the doctor asked. He looked up at my face; I felt like a circus freak. I slowly lifted my shirt.

The doctor began talking quickly; I didn't understand anything he said. His shoes echoed loudly on the tiled floor as he walked around me. He pressed on the hard nob of bones lumped in my back. The only thing I did understand was the rising panic in his tone.

"Do you know what's wrong?" I asked. Terror etched through the old guy's face as he returned to face me. He took several steps back. His hand stretched towards the counter. I eyed the syringes nervously.

"Is there some sort of vaccine or--WOAH!"

I sprang from the table. The doctor held up a very large, very sharp knife. He sliced it through the air threateningly.

"Wait! I need to know--" I ducked as the blade came heart-stoppingly close to my ear. I scrambled towards the door.

"Diablo! Diablo!" the doctor screamed. I flung open the door just as he threw the knife at me. The blade stuck in the wood. The little nurse started to talk to me, but I didn't stop. I scampered into the waiting room. My arms shot out and I pushed the glass door open.

A sickening rush of heat overtook me. I bent over at the waist, gasping for breath.

There was no way I could perform tonight. Hell, there was no way I could go back to the hotel. I felt jittery; all I could picture was the doctor and his legion of nurses hunting me down. I took off down the street. People turned and looked at me curiously; I was the only idiot wearing a hoodie in the middle of summer.

The only thing I knew for certain was that I needed to hide. My stomach was growling miserably. I stopped and bought a flavorless taco. The meat was overcooked. I threw half away in the trash - a first for me.

I found refuge by the water. The waves crashed ashore with reckless abandon. I found a cove of sorts created by a rock grouping. I sat down and tore off the hoodie. My arms were covered. I brought my face to my knees and sighed.

I thought about Lauren. The mere thought of the bruises on her body made me sick. I didn't remember having sex with her. Something similar to instinct seemed to have kicked in. I vaguely remember thinking that she was female and I needed her.

The result disgusted me.

I'm not usually a stationary person, but the numbness allowed me to stay in my haven. A few kids darted past my hideout only to be called quickly back by concerned parents. The surf looked as angry as I felt. My eyes marked the sun's path as it made it's way from its perch high in the sky to its descent on the horizon.

Feeling suddenly exhausted, I curled up in the sand using my hoodie as a pillow. I don't know how long, if at all, I was asleep. My eyes flew open and the dark shadows of night spilled all around me. A crab scuttled by, its claws held at the ready. My eyes darted upwards.

The moon - the moment I laid eyes on it I knew - the moon in all its enormity overwhelmed me. I cried out in pain, my chin slamming against my chest. My clothes tore as I expanded; I felt ever bone in my body break and shift. Sand slid under my growing nails as my fingers dug into the soft ground. I writhed in agony; gasping for breath. The extra bones in my back suddenly found a home. The scent of the salty water almost knocked me senseless. I shook my head furiously. The pain became less. I sat in stoned silence and looked back up at the giant orb.

The howl that I let out was far removed from humanity. It was completely animalistic. My head lowered; I felt the fur sprouting everywhere. My hands were gone; in their place two giant paws slapped the sand. Nerve endings in a tail that minutes ago didn't exist twitched. I clawed at myself in horror. I wasn't Nick anymore. I didn't know what I was.

All I knew was that I was hungry. My stomach growled. No, make that starving. I needed to eat. I sniffed the air. A trail of blood dripped down my front leg. The vague scent of the children from earlier teased me. Oh, why didn't I take one when I had the chance?

Slowly, I crept out from my hiding spot. I had never been able to see so well in my entire life. Every little bug caught my attention. My heart was beating so fast I was afraid it was going to tear out of my chest. I had no recollection of anything but the now. The hunter was taking over even as my last shred of human sensibility fought to keep it back. I took off at a quick trot. My feet hit hard pavement. I stayed in the shadows.

I wasn't sweating anymore. The wind picked up my hair. I opened my mouth a little to catch some of the air. A noise put me into an instant crouch.

The sound of laughter came closer and closer. I tucked my tail to keep it from thumping excitedly. A thick line of drool dripped from my mouth. Humans were coming near. Humans with warm blood ready for the taking.

"This is the first time Howie and Leigh offered to babysit. It's been too long since our last date."

That voice. It was familiar. Very familiar. A couple walked by. The man wrapped his arm around the woman's slender waist. They were both blonde and healthy. I let out a growl. The woman stopped.

"Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?"

"I could have sworn I heard a dog."

Dog. I wasn't a dog. I was...I was...

The man leaned closer and whispered something. The woman smacked the man's shoulder. They walked off.

My muscles ached. It had taken every bit of energy not to lunge. I pawed the ground. I marked my scent. Eventually I found a dumpster filled with rotting, bloody steak remains. I gourged until the ache in my gut began to subside. I licked at my wound. The blood held a peculiar taste; not nearly as pleasant as the steaks.

Not nearly as pleasant as--.

I paused, my tongue still pressed against my fur. Humans were approaching. Suddenly the steaks seemed like just an appetizer. I imagine my teeth sinking into skin, soaking up the blood that gushed from nerve and muscle. They were two pretty girls, not much older than eighteen. My mind screamed for me to stop; my body moved forward.

I remember nothing else.

Chapter Five

I woke up the next morning with sand in my mouth. I hocked a huge loogie, but still little particles stuck to my tongue. I was naked; the sand scratched along my bare skin. I sat up shaking.

The first thing I did was slap my face. Smooth except for a slight five o'clock shadow. No snout or fangs. I glanced down; my arms and legs were bare. I reached around and ran my finger as close to my spine as possible. No bone protrusion.

Had it been a dream? A quick glance at my arms told me that I was being too optimistic. A couple angry claw marks ran from my elbow down to my wrist.

My hoodie was the only piece of clothing that wasn't in tatters. I swung it over my head. I slid my hand into the pocket; my cellphone was still there.

The events of last night were a mystery. The last thing I remembered was woofing down rotten meat. My only consolation was that the only blood on me was my own.

Tears sprang to my eyes; my pride had hit rock bottom. I stared at the display for several long minutes. With a loud exhale I made one call. There was only one person I trusted enough to come get me.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"So you're trying to tell me," Bri said as I got dressed in my little rock fortress. "that we had to cancel the show last night because you sprouted hair and a snout and went all Kibbles and Bits on us?"

"I know it sounds insane," I said. "But...I think I turned into a dog."

Bri laughed. "Sure you didn't turn into the wolfman?"

I paused; my pants fell back around my ankles. "What makes you say that?"

"People were talking about one of the doctors in town going beserk yesterday. I guess he ran out of the hospital wielding a huge knife and talking about a wolfman."

I yanked up my jeans, zipped them, and swallowed hard. Bri stopped laughing.

"Nick?"

"I went to a doctor yesterday," I said. "And he did run after me with a knife."

The look on Bri's face was priceless. If I hadn't been one hundred percent serious, I would have taken a picture.

"That's not funny."

"I know! But, c'mon. You saw the hair you shaved off me..."

"Maybe you just have a vitamin deficiency," Bri rationalized.

"Lauren left me," I said bitterly.

"What?!"

"I hurt her Bri. I don't remember hurting her but there were bruises and--and--"

"Nick, do you need to go home?"

I sighed. I had never been the reason for a cancelled show. We only had two shows left. I could do it. I shook my head.

"No."

Bri didn't look so sure. I walked out to him, fully dressed.

"You look exhausted," he commented.

"I had a rough night," I said. "I don't remember most of it, but I'm pretty sure that's the truth."

"Maybe you can sleep on the flight."

"Maybe," I agreed. We walked in silence. We were nearing the hotel when I stopped.

"Bri?" My heart began to race. He stopped.

"Yeah?"

"Did you and Leighanne...did you two go out last night?"

Bri's forehead crinkled. "Yeah. Why?"

I thought back. The man and woman walking by me...the familiarity...the desire to tear them to shreads...

I felt physically ill. I had almost killed my best friend and his wife. My mouth opened, but I didn't even know how to begin to explain my panic.

"No reason," I said. Bri opened the lobby door for me and I walked in. We had just enough time to get our bags and meet the others at the airport.

I wanted to put this stop behind me; as far as I was concerned, it never happened. My plan was to complete the last two shows and then go home and beg Lauren for forgiveness.

And, for good measure, I was going to do one of those laser hair removals.

But that would be my little secret.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Steak. Rare," I whispered.

"It will be a half hour," the polite voice coming from the other end of the line said.

"That's fine. Thanks," I said.

I hung up the phone and glanced at myself in the mirror for the umpteenth time. The guys and I had just finished our last concert. I was back to normal except for a huge case of exhaustion and the sting of the painful scabs that had formed over the slashes on my arms.

The horrible scars on my chest were also back.

I thought back to what Bri had said. Wolfman. I was a big believer in the unknown. In my mind, Bigfoot existed and Area 51 was filled with aliens.

But could a human really become a wolf?

While I waited for my steak, I grabbed my cell. My laptop battery had completely died and I didn't want to get a new one until I got home. I had learned my lesson about blackmarket stuff the last time I bought a pair of blue Nikes. My feet had looked like twin blueberries for a month. My fingers flew over my small screen.

Wikipedia is an awesome thing. I know people say you can't take all the information for fact, but I've found it to be a pretty good go-to source. The entry on werewolves was extremely long. By the length of some of the words, it looked like a rocket scientist had contributed to the thread. I sank back in my pillows and began to read.

If I was hoping the information was going to make me feel better, I had been grossly mistaken. Teeny tiny little pictures of horrible transformations intermingled with a long history of werewolves. I kept coming back to one particular passage:

In Italy, France and Germany, it is said that a man can turn into a werewolf if he, on a certain Wednesday or Friday, is attacked in a dense forest and left to lay with the full moon shining directly on his face.

I glanced down at my chest. I had been attacked in Germany. I couldn't recall what day of the week it was, but suddenly I did seem to recall the huge moon overhead and the sensation of being dragged over the undergrowth.

"No," I whispered. I was reading the line once more when a loud knock sounded on the door. I screamed, then remembering my room service, I scrambled off my bed. I

The girl holding my tray looked nervous.

"Sorry," I said. "I forgot."

I gave the girl a generous tip and took the tray. She returned to her cart and hauled ass down the hall.

My track record with the opposite sex was failing rapidly.

I returned to the bed with my meal. Even with the lid on, I could smell the bloody beef. I glanced back at my phone one more time. I had gone as far as the side-effects:

After returning to their human forms, werewolves are usually documented as becoming weak, debilitated and undergoing painful nervous depression.

Was I weak? Yes. Was I depressed?

My finger poked the warm meat.

The jury was still out.

Chapter Six

"Laur, please let me in."

I had my forehead pressed up against our front door, peering over the chain that was keeping me out. A beautiful blue eye narrowed.

"We don't have anything to talk about."

"Yes, we do! I know I hurt you--"

"Nick, what you did wasn't humane."

"I know. That's what I need to talk to you about. Please let me in."

I was beginning to think she had walked away when finally the chain dropped. I gently pushed the door open and walked in. Lauren backed up, her arms crossed over her chest. The bruises had already turned an ugly shade of yellow.

"First off, I'm so sorry. I don't remember what happened," I said. Laur looked down at the floor.

"Can we sit down and talk?" I asked. "This might take awhile."

She pointed towards the living room. "Go ahead."

I walked through the house, trying to ignore the cardboard boxes scattered throughout. Moving boxes. I sat down heavily on the couch. Lauren sat on the edge of what we both called her 'fluffy' chair.

"Something happened to me down in South America," I said thickly. "Something...completely insane."

Lauren didn't say anything, but she didn't throw anything at me either. I took a deep breath and pushed on.

"That night when...this happened," I said, motioning towards her. "This was the night before I turned into a werewolf."

I was expecting some type of reaction from my big revelation. Instead Lauren sank back into her chair and looked at me sadly.

"Nick, what are you on?"

"What do you mean, what am I on?"

"Heroin? Cocaine?"

I started. "Laur, I'm not on anything. I'm serious. You left, there was a full moon and I turned into a wolf."

"Nick, werewolves don't exist. You obviously had a bad trip on whatever you took. I'm okay with the occasional drink, but you know how I feel about drugs--"

"I'm clean!" I said heatedly. "I need you to believe me. I'm...I'm scared."

"You can't be as scared as I was that night," Lauren said. Her voice wavered. "Nick, I love you, but--"

"Please give me another chance. I'll take a drug test if it makes you feel better."

I could see the tug of war playing out across her face as she weighed her decision. My eyes welled up with tears.

"Okay," she said. "I'll stay. But if you even lay a finger on me wrong, I'm out of here."

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. "Deal."

Lauren got up slowly. She walked over an wrapped her arms around my neck. I pulled her down on my lap.

"Tell me," she murmured. "How in the world you came up with the werewolf excuse. Too many horror movies?"

I tilted my head back. "I didn't come up with an excuse. I'm serious. I looked it up on the Internet. You know those chest scars from that attack in Germany? I'm pretty sure I was attacked by another werewolf."

She shook her head. "I--"

"I was covered in hair. I had extra bones poking out of my back."

Here, she looked nervous. Her eyes dropped to the floor.

"Did you see them?" I asked breathlessly.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said quickly.

"You know something."

Her lips quivered slightly. "When we were in bed and you went nuts I tried to hit you and I felt something weird." She shook her head. "But I know it was just irrationality from the fear."

"It wasn't. It was real."

"Nick, do we have to talk about this now?"

I decided not to press my luck. I didn't want to end up sleeping in the doghouse.

Even though at the moment, that's where I was pretty sure I belonged.



* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Two weeks later, Lauren and I were back on track. I had successfully sucked up with days of flowers, dinners, and jewelry. I felt so normal that even I had begun to think that I had just gone crazy in South America. Our best guess was that maybe they had put opiates in the water. Only I was dumb enough to drink tap in a foreign country, after all.

As usual, I woke up later than Lauren. I buried my face in the soft down pillow and inhaled. Lauren always sprayed this fabric refresher that smelled like lemons. It was a great morning aphrodisiac.

My mind had just begun to float around possible breakfast choices when my happy little morning routine was interrupted by the sound of retching. I sat up and ran a hand through my hair.

"Lauren?" I called out. A little groan came from the bathroom. I swung my feet over the side of the bed and stood up. My arms stretched towards the ceiling as I unfolded my body. The retching continued.

I headed towards the bathroom. The moment I opened the door, I recoiled. I'm no stranger to vomit, but this was no ordinary vomiting. The smell triggered my gag reflex. Puke in and of itself isn't pleasant, but the odious odor wafting from the woman on the floor was like a cesspool of the most vile things known to man.

Before going in again, I brought my shirt up over my nose. It did little to mask the odor. Lauren's long arm hooked around the toilet bowl. Her hair fell in sweaty tangles.

"What's wrong?" I mumbled, desperate not to get a good wiff of air.

"I don't kn--" The rest of her sentence was caught off as she jerked forward, her head deep in the bowl. She let loose again.

For one insane moment, through the other foul smells, I thought I caught a wiff of blood. It wasn't 'woman' blood, as I called it. It wasn't blood from a fresh open wound.

Somehow, it smelled exactly like something fairly appealing.

It smelled like the blood oozing from a rare steak.

Chapter Seven

"We need to get you to the emergency room," I said.

Lauren wasn't the sweaty type. Not even when she worked out. That's why the beads of sweat dripping down her cheeks was alarming. She reached a shaking arm out and flushed the contents of her stomach down the drain.

"It's just the stomach flu," she said weakly.

I knew what the stomach flu looked like; hell, I fell victim to it anytime we went overseas. It was always just a game of 'What Country is Nick Gonna Crap His Pants In This Year?'

"I don't care if that's all it is," I said. I knew better than to argue with her. No matter what, she always won the argument whether she was right or wrong. That was a piece of relationship logic I had finally learned. I touched her arm. It was hot to my touch. "Let's go," I said gently.

Thankfully, she didn't argue. She got to her feet, her nightgown floating around her ankles. A dangerous belch almost had her turning back to the porcelain bowl, but she took a couple deep breaths through her nose and headed into the bedroom.

Twenty minutes later, I had the top down on my convertible and we were headed to the emergency room. Lauren was dressed in baggy sweats; the shirt was one of my favorites. The red sign loomed up ahead, when she flung herself over the edge of the door and projectile vomited with me going fifteen miles an hour. The wind picked up that unmistakable blood smell once more. I refrained from looking like a freak and sniffing greedily. Instead, I swung into the nearest available parking space, and, hopping around the puddles of ick, opened the door and took Lauren's arm.

The ER was swamped, as always. I tossed up the hood on my own sweatshirt and hovered by the nurse's desk until an attendant sat down. In a low whisper, I identified myself and Lauren.

There's a definite 'celebrity tier' when it comes to ER access. BIG celebrities never even see the ER. They're whisked away to a private room and a doctor is paged ASAP. Middling celebrities are rushed immediately back into an ER room that can be locked away from any prying eyes.

Then there was me. A year ago, I was listed under the 'celebrity, but not a security threat' category. I wouldn't have to sit among the masses in the hard plastic chairs, but triage was as far as I got.

Now that the whole NKOTBSB thing had hit, my status must have slightly gone up. We were brought into an ER room (with a door!).

But we had to endure a wait.

Lauren hopped up on the exam table and lay back. She shook her head at the ceiling. I pressed my hand to her forehead and winced. She was burning.

As almost everyone knows, I'm not a patient person. The first five minutes were bareable. The next five minutes, I began to pace. By the time we had been in the room fifteen minutes, I was opening the door and peeking out.

"Excuse me."

The shortest woman I had ever seen walked under me and towards the bed. After identifying herself as one of the nurses, she went through the normal steps: taking down information, taking blood pressure...

"Let's get a temp," she said. She hopped up on a stool by the exam table. Lauren took the thermometer and gave me an unmistakable eye roll. I smiled.

It seemed to take forever for the thermometer to beep. When it did, the nurse took one look at it, popped the plastic covering, and put it back in Lauren's mouth.

"This thing must have had a rough night," she joked.

Again, the thermomter didn't beep for an extremely long time. And yet again, the nurse saw the display and popped the covering. She shook her head.

"Let me go get another thermometer."

"Why?" I asked.

The nurse laughed. "It's reading a 108. Crazy, right? I'll be right back."

She turned and walked out of the room, studying the display in her hands. Lauren looked at me. I looked down at the floor.

The bad feeling that I had been pushing to the back of my mind was growing faster and faster. I shoved my hands into my hoodie pocket and focused on the pattern of my breathing.

"Okay, let's try this again," the nurse said a minute later. She slid the thermometer into a slot, came out with a covering, and for the third time Lauren held the object under her tongue.

The result? 108.

"I think we better wait for the doctor," the nurse said nervously. She did, for her credit, give Lauren a wink. "But rest assured, this has to be wrong. If it was 108 you'd be brain dead."

"I'm not there yet," Lauren said softly. She flashed me a little smile and I've got to admit, the big romantic in me melted a little. Even feeling like shit she could toss out a little sarcasm.

And that's why we had been together so long.

The nurse left soon after. It was another fifteen minute wait before the doctor came in. I don't even remember if he introduced himself. The guy was like a human cyclone. He tried Lauren's temperature once more, but the number remained static. He listened to Lauren's explanation of the stomach flu, all the while tapping his foot.

"Lay back," he said.

Lauren did as she was told. The doctor pressed under her rib cage, asking if there were any pain. She shook her head no. He went slightly lower, and again the answer was no.

It was when he raised her shirt to press on her abdomen that I noticed for the first time how swollen it was. When he pressed, she jumped.

"Hurt?" he asked.

"Yes," she said through gritted teeth.

"Left or right?"

"All over!" she screamed as he did it again.

"Hmm, maybe gallbladder? Appendictis?" he mused to himself. He turned to the nurse.

"We're going to need labs, ultrasound, urine, yada, yada, yada." The yada's were replaced with things I had never heard of. The nurse nodded and the doctor whisked away without even a backwards glance. I flipped him off to make me feel better.

"What's going on?" Lauren asked.

"The doctor thinks maybe your appendix burst," the nurse explained in normal English. "We're going to rush you through a whole bunch of tests." She looked at me. "We're gonna have to leave you for a bit, okay?"

What choice did I have? I nodded, walked over to Lauren, and kissed her softly. Her eyes were filled with confusion.

"I'll be here when you get back," I promised. "Be good," I added. Lauren laughed.

"When does that ever happen?" she asked.

The nurse kicked off the breaks, and even though she reminded me of an Oompa Loompa or Lollipop Kid, she pushed the bed right out through the door. I sank into a chair and rubbed my hands together, templing them underneath my chin.

It sounds horrible, but I was praying that the answer would be her appendix. The part of me that was trying to block out my own horrible experience was remaining steadfast on that easy, medical textbook explanation.

The other half of me, the half that couldn't forget sensed something much more dangerous. The temperature change, the sweating...I didn't swell, but then again I wasn't female.

Could I have turned Lauren into a...a...werewolf?

Chapter Eight

Turns out, Lauren didn't need to have X-rays, MRIs, or any of the junk the doctor had rattled off at first. One trip to the bathroom was enough.

Or at least, that's what everyone thought.

"Great news," little Miss Muffet said as she came back in the room. "You're pregnant. Quite far along at that."

"That's impossible," Lauren said. "I haven't missed a period."

"Well, the doctor will be in shortly," the nurse replied. "I just came in to give you a heads up."

She put down the clipboard and whisked out of the room. Lauren mopped her forehead and looked at me in disbelief.

"It's impossible," she repeated.

I didn't know what to say. There were so many possible reactions. I mean, I could hug her and ramble on about how it was going to be okay, even fun, blah blah blah. Or I could agree with her and feed into the improbability. The last option, the one I chose, was to sit there in stone silence and think the worst.

Doctor Tornado whirled into the room about ten minutes after the nurse left. Nurse Mini Wheats was rolling in a monitor behind him.

"Let's see what we have here Lauren," the doctor said. Out came a tube, out came a wand, on went the screen, up went her shirt--all in the course of seconds. I felt like a dunce, sitting there, clutching my hands together in one giant ball, barely able to conceal the scream that was bubbling up. Lauren looked at me, almost pleadingly, and yet I just stared at the equipment. Could it qualm my fear?

It didn't qualm my fear. I couldn't decipher the results of the poor image that lit up the screen, but I turned my attention to the doctor's face. The wand seemed to slow, his face grew ashen.

"What?" I whispered.

"I think," the doctor said slowly, way more slowly than he had addressed us since we walked in. "That I'm going to refer you to a specialist."

"Why?" Lauren demanded.

"You have multiples."

"Multiples?"

It was kind of like one of those hidden picture scenes. As soon as the doctor pointed, I was able to make out what we were supposed to have been seeing. His finger drifted over four distinct shapes.

Four. A...a...litter.

"This is impossible," Lauren said a little louder when the word 'quadruplets' was uttered. "I haven't even been late."

"You're about ten weeks."

Lauren shook her head. "Impossible." She turned to me. "Nick?"

Her voice was beseeching.

"Your temperature is...odd. You need to see a specialist. Today," the doctor stressed.

I exhaled. "Can we have a referral?"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"You're about fourteen weeks along."

"The doctor this morning said she was ten weeks," I argued.

I didn't add that this morning, Lauren's stomach had been uneasily bloated. By the afternoon, it had enlarged even more. She really did look pregnant. Even so, she was holding on steadfast to her denial.

"No, gestational size for multiples indicates fourteen weeks," the doctor explained. He looked down at Lauren. "Hadn't you noticed any weight gain?"

"Not until last night," Lauren said. "And this morning. It all happened this morning."

The doctor looked doubtful. I, on the other hand, believed every word Lauren was saying. As my only feeble means of support, I squeezed her fingers.

"Your papers from the ER list your temperature as 108," the OB/GYN said with an ironic smirk. "Bad equipment, huh?"

Again, I didn't think so. Lauren's hair was saturated in dampness. Another round of vomiting before our appointment had produced the same animalistic smell I had recognized earlier.

"Let's have you sit up and we'll take it again."

I helped Lauren into a sitting position. Her shoulders slumped as she opened her mouth reluctantly.

Two mintues later, the thermometer registered a 109.

"Impossible," the doctor muttered. She shook her head.

Impossible was the word of the day, or so it seemed.

"I'm going to double-check your blood tests," she said. "I'll probably be drawing more. You're automatically high-risk."

Neither of us said a word until the doctor had left the room. Lauren turned to me.

"Nick, I'm scared."

"I know," I said. I couldn't look into her eyes. "So was I."

"Was?"

"When it happened to me."

"What are you talking about?"

I had no choice. I stared into her greyish face. "When I turned last month. Into...into the werewolf."

Lauren grew angry. "Nick, I don't need to hear your ridiculous story. Not today. Of all days. Nick, I'm carrying four fucking babies."

"Lauren, what if when I attacked you I made you a werewolf too?" I said, ignoring her tirade. "Doesn't it make sense? Wolves have litters. You're sweating just like I was and--"

The sting of her hand across my face rendered me speechless. I touched my burning cheek; she began to cry.

"Nick, I can't believe you. I need support. Besides, I told you I never want to talk about that night again."

Her chest heaved. She swiped at her neck, her fingers emerging wet.

"Lauren, I'm worried for you. I'm just trying to help."

"Then, don't."

I lapsed back into silence. Only Lauren's cries broke up the monotony. After another eternity, the doctor came back. A plethora of extra blood tests were requested. The visit wrapped up with with no more answers than when we came in.

Lauren continued the iciness as we drove home. Once back, she went up to our room, curled up in bed, and went to sleep. When I was sure it was safe - that I wouldn't get slapped or yelled at - I crawled in beside her with my laptop. For awhile I just watched her.

Then I powered the laptop on. Google was my target. Werewolves was my subject. I went through pages that looked legit, only to realize they were stories. Other pages were too horrific for me to read all the way to the end. The last page I hit upon was a schedule of all the full moons for the year.

The last full moon had been the day of my transformation. The next full moon?

Two weeks away. Time would tell if my suspicions were right.

For Lauren's sake, I hoped I was wrong.

Chapter Nine

"Seventeen weeks."

"Twenty weeks."

Lauren had gone from not being pregnant at all to five months pregnant in just two weeks. I would have deemed the doctors quacks had it not been for the rapid changes Lauren had gone through.

The morning I woke up with the first sign of coarse hair on my hands was also the morning when the deep purple line trailing from Lauren's navel down became extremely prominent. She had lost sight of her feet the day before.

She was still sleeping as I studied the dark blonde fur. I rubbed it and sighed. The full moon was two days away.

I turned back to Lauren. Slowly I swept her hair away from her neck. She didn't feel as warm to me as in the past. Then again, I could feel the sweat beading on my own forehead. I was desensitived.

Lauren's normally smooth, slender neck was scratchy. Dark brown hair trailed down towards her back. I yanked my hand back, my eyes squeezing shut.

It was happening. No amount of denial was going to stop it.

The subject was taboo, but that didn't stop me from obsessing and finding any information I could. I didn't want to be scared like the first time.

I wanted to be prepared; even more so now that I had passed it on to Lauren. The guilt made the need that much stronger.

"Mmm," Lauren moaned. She rolled over and curled up to me. I pressed a hand to her stomach.

Information on potentially pregnant were-women didn't exist on line. I had no idea what to expect. The only thing I was able to find confirmed my suspicion on why her due date kept changing.

A standard wolf's pregnancy only lasts sixty-three days.

"Mmm," Lauren moaned again. Her hand pressed against my chest. The top of her hand was covered in the same dark brown fur.

"Nick," she whispered. Her eyes fluttered open.

"Hey," I whispered back.

Things had been tense between the two of us. I think both of us were living in our own little worry bubble. This was the closest that Lauren had been to me since---since---

I didn't have time to think about dates. She kissed me hard. Then she growled.

The events after that were a blur. Lauren was strong; just as strong as me. This time there were no bruises. It was insane; it was vicious.

It was good.

We must have fallen asleep afterwards - I don't really recall. Just like the last time, big chunks of time were blacked out in my mind.

Lauren's scream woke me up.

"What?" I asked, scrambling to sit up. I rubbed my back against the headboard; the itching was starting again.

Lauren sat, bare chested, staring in horror at her hands. "What's happening?"

She tossed back the covers, only to scream again. Her legs - the legs she had laser waxed, or whatever the girls did to make them feel like butter, were slowly spreading in dense brown fur.

It was happening to her quicker than it had for me the first time. Maybe it was the pregnancy...the hormones already throwing her off balance. I don't know. I do know that I could relate to her fear.

"It's almost the full moon," I said. She turned to look at me. I showed her my hands.

"So what?" she snapped.

I was walking a very shaky line. I swallowed hard. "That's when the transformation takes place. From human to werewolf."

"You're fucking insane. If I wasn't..." she gestured towards her stomach. "If I wasn't a freak of nature right now, I'd leave."

"You can't," I said forcefully. "I don't want you to be alone when it---when it happens."

Lauren stood up. I averted my eyes from the sight of the odd bone protruding from her back.

"Conversation over, Nickolas."

Indeed, the conversation was over. Lauren took her shower. I took mine. We sat around the house, miserably running our backs along walls, on the chair, anywhere that would take the itching done slightly.

Towards lunchtime, Lauren disappeared into the kitchen. She was gone so long that I couldn't help but check on her. I found her standing with the refrigerator door open eating hamburger.

Raw hamburger.

"Laur," I said. She looked up. The sight wasn't revolting. To anyone else, yes, but not to me.

"Help," she whispered.

"I'm not going anywhere," I promised.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"When does the sun set?" Lauren asked.

We were sitting side by side in the doorway of our balcony, watching the sun dip lower on the horizon. I felt oddly in control. I knew what was about to happen. Lauren clung to a kleenex, her eyes red-rimmed. We were both dressed in swimsuits. Anything else was too confining--too hot.

"In a few minutes. I don't remember if it happened exactly at that point or not."

There was no way Lauren could deny it any longer. We hadn't slept at all the night before. Instead we had stayed up and I had gone over ever little bit of information I had gleaned. She closed her eyes and tipped her head back.

"So, I'll have to go through two of these...these things before I give birth?" she asked fifteen minutes later. The shadows of the night were beginning to form. I could hear the water not far off lapping onto shore.

"If the theory's right. Yes."

"What are we going to do with four--"

She never had the chance to finish her sentence. She crumpled out of her chair. A moment later, the same feeling overtook me. It was the same as before - every bond in my body seemingly broke and shifted. My face was no longer my own. Nose and jaw elongated with agonizing slowness. I fell to the floor, my body writhing to and fro. Hands became paws. Sight weakened; smell strengthened.

Lauren's somber howl broke me from my narcissim. My head turned.

Her fur was brown and long. She pawed at the ground, desperately trying to gnaw at herself. I nuzzled her, if only to tell her it was alright. I didn't want her to maim herself like I had tried to do the month before. She turned and snapped the air in my direction.

I had made adequate preparations just in case. I had called all the guys to let them know Lauren and I were going out of town. I hadn't even told them about the pregnancy yet. The more people that knew, the more questions that would have been asked.

The other thing I did was to buy steaks in bulk. They were sitting on the kitchen counter. I refused to go out on the streets. To do so meant danger for myself...and for anyone walking the streets.

Lauren was the first to move towards the stairs. I trotted at her backside.

The steaks were gone in seconds.

Planning ahead has never been my strong suit, but this was life or death. As it so happens, Lauren and I spent the evening curled up on our mattress, noses touching. It's crazy, but in wolf form, I could even sense the babies more than ever. I picked up on their movement. I couldn't imagine what Lauren was feeling. I lovingly licked the side of her face. A tear cascaded out of one large golden eye.

With every fiber of my being, I hated that I had done this to her. The worst part was not knowing how it would end.

But, for the here and now, it was all about just getting through the night.

The morning would only bring more questions.

Chapter Ten

I woke up the next morning back in human form. Lauren was sitting up, wrapped in a heavy blanket, her eyes wide.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"That really happened," she said slowly. I sat up slowly, my joints aching in places that I didn't even know they could ache. Even though the trace of the wolf had disappeared, I felt a lingering muscularity.

"It really happened," I confirmed.

"Where did you go...the first time?"

"It was right after you left. I wasn't prepared. I was chased out of a doctor's office and ended up at the beach. I remember staring at the moon and then it happened." I swallowed hard. "I almost killed Brian and Leighanne."

Laur gasped. "What do you mean you almost killed them?"

"I was hungry. I wasn't prepared like this time. I went prowling the streets. They walked by. It took all my strength to let them pass."

"Nick, this is insane."

"I know."

"And what about this?" she asked motioning to her belly. "I think my mom's going to wonder how I ended up delivering quadruplets when she just saw me three months ago. And what if they're not...human?"

Sometimes I had horrible sense of humor. The corners of my mouth twitched.

"I guess we buy one big cage instead of four cribs."

It was the ABSOLUTELY wrong thing to say. Lauren a mask stared at me angrily, her face a mask of hurt.

"I'm sorry," I said quickly. She turned her face away from me.

"We'll figure it out," I promised.

"How can we figure it out?" she asked. "You're going to be busy recording."

"At least it's here in L.A.," I argued. "I'm not going to leave you."

A loud sniffle rent the air. "Promise?"

I squeezed her shoulder. "Promise."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Hey, where's Lauren? I figured she'd be bringing you tofu-based lunches," AJ joked.

It had been the daily question for the last two weeks. Lauren wasn't even able to get out of bed anymore. we were too scared to go to the doctor. Anyone that cross compared her charts would have her sent to Area 51.

Of course, every other wife/girlfriend had stopped by. Lauren was M.I.A. I took a bite of my french dip sandwich and chewed a long time, contemplating.

"She's not here," I finally said. "She's judging one of the fitness competitions in New York."

"Hence the french dip sandwich," Bri teased. He wrapped his arm around my neck and squeezed my affectionately. I jabbed him in the ribs.

"Well, something's working for ya," D added. "You've got something more than a six-pack. I don't even know what they would call it."

My muscle tone was continuing to develop. In a way it was a blessing - Lauren's newfound penchant for any and all food had me eating alongside her. The whole sympathy thing was true. Yet, I continued to look like I spent hours in the gym.

"Some of us are just naturedly blessed," I said with a grin. I dunked the last bite of my sandwich in the au jus and stuffed it in my mouth. I crinkled the deli paper and shot towards the trash can.

"Nothing but net," Bri sportscasted.

It was officially June. we were slowly recording new songs. Jive was back to its normal dictatorship. Anything remotely radio-worthy was quickly getting nixed.

"Max is coming in June 7," Howie called out. His nose was inches from his blackberry. "He says he has a bunch of good stuff for us."

"Which will probably never see the light of day," Bri scowled. Leighanne, the Backstreet wife of the day, nodded in irritation.

"June 7?" I asked. I glanced at my phone. A large round circle stared back at me on that date. The next full moon. "I don't think I can--"

"All four of us have to be here," Howie said. "He's coming in on the early morning flight."

"So we'll be done by say...seven?" I asked. I needed time to lay out steaks. I needed time to prepare for a possible wolf puppy birth. I rubbed my neck nervously.

"Why? You got a hot date?" AJ teased. I smirked.

"Lauren's coming back that day," I said. "So, yes."

"We'll be done by seven," Howie said. "Just don't oversleep."

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, sergeant."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"I don't like this."

"I think you should eat something other than--"

"I WANT IT!"

The wolf in me might have faded during the rest of the month for me, but for Lauren it was a constant. She stared at the plate resting on her stomach. I picked it up, looking at the medium rare steak.

"I'll be right back."

I ran down the stairs, back to the kitchen. Our freezer and refrigerator were stocked with steaks. I picked up a package, wrapped in white butcher paper, and snipped the string. I paused to scratch the fur on my hands.

The plump steak oozed. I took the first steak as my own, and brought the uncooked meat up to her. Her face lit up. "Better."

I knew now how I must have looked in South America. She greedily sucked at the juice on her fingers. No fork or knife was needed; her teeth were already elongating. The hair on her neck was coming in rapidly. The days had moved to quickly. The moon loomed again.

"I have to work tomorrow," I said slowly. She glanced at me, chewing vigorously.

"But tomorrow--"

"I know."

"But the hair..."

"I'm going to shave the mitts," I said. "I'm wearing a hoodie."

"In June?"

"I don't have a choice."

"But you'll be back before--"

"Of course. Nothing's keeping me away. We're locking ourselves in the house again and waiting it out."

"And if they come?"

We both looked down. I could almost see her skin moving from the tangle of arms and legs.

"Then we'll do what we can."

Chapter Eleven

6:30 p.m.

"Then there's this one. I really want to get a demo on this one."

I glanced up at the clock. "We don't have time to do that one," I argued. Max looked at me in surprised. Howie nudged me in my ribs. I prayed he didn't feel the hair.

"Of course we do. It won't take long."

I glanced at the clock again.

6:55

"AJ, let's have you and Nick swap parts."

I leaned towards Howie. "I've really got to--"

"Ten more minutes. Max."

I sighed. I could feel the magnetic pull already. I studied the music, quickly going over the new lines.

We began again.

7:15

"Now there's this one--"

I inched towards the door. Howie shook his head.

"Just five more--"

If I didn't leave that second I wasn't going to get home in time. I felt it coming in the pit of my stomach. I wrapped my hand around the knob.

"I'm sorry," I said huskily. "Yell at me tomorrow."

Before I could hear any death threats, I ran down the hall, my heart racing. I threw myself in my car and cranked the engine.

7:30

"Traffic is reportedly backed up due to an overturned tanker. Cars are being rerouted on--"

Shadows were everywhere. My eyes darted rapidly. It seemed as if I only had seconds. The line I was stuck in inched forward and I saw an opening for a gas station. I swung my wheel wildly.

The change happened the moment that I parked behind the building. The leather seat of my convertible groaned as the human form shifted to the wolf.

Suddenly distance away wasn't measured in miles. It was measured by the moon. It was measured by the scent. I hopped over the side of the car, my feet slamming heavily into the concrete. I took off over the embankment.

Even as the wolf I knew the interstate was no place for me.

Thoughts were simple. Home. Food. Partner. Protect.

Humans were my distractor. They were close, but not close enough for my defenses to completely collapse. I lifted my head, sniffing the air greedily. I let out an outraged howl.

My travels were taking too long.

Once I smelled the salt water, I knew I was close. I stayed close to trees and hedges. I was large, to large to be completely concealed. I didn't care.

Home. Food. Partner. Protect.

Home and food meant nothing when I finally made my way to the front door. I sat down, a low whimper escaping from my throat.

The door had been battered down. I could smell Lauren's scent.

She had gone. Gone in search of food. Gone in search of me.

Instinct.

I pressed my nose against the walk and inhaled deeply. The scent told me which way to go. My stomach growled angrily. My mouth watered as I passed homes filled with flesh and blood.

Lauren was slower than me. She was carrying young. I sped up, sniffing faster.

Time didn't mean much in minutes. I kept track of time with the moon. The moon dipped noticeably twice before I heard the screams and knew.

Partner. Prey.

I suddenly didn't care who saw me. I took off at a run.

Lauren had the man in blue by the leg. The human was screaming in agony. Blood covered Lauren's muzzled. The man's arms moved rapidly, but Lauren couldn't be bothered with that. My nose caught the scent and I wanted nothing more but to join in.

And I would have joined in had it not been for the reflection of the silver object the man pulled from his waist. In my human life I knew the object was cause for fear. I bared my teeth and let out a loud growl. Lauren looked up. She backed off, taking a huge hunk of leg with her. The man seemed to think the growl came from Lauren. He aimed the object at her.

I bared my jaw, sinking my teeth into the arm that wanted to harm my mate. Another agonizing scream filled the air. A loud bang sounded; something missed my shoulder by an inch. I hung on for dear life.

Suddenly, something hard slammed against the side of my head. I momentarily forgot what I was doing. My jaw fell slack. I lapped at the blood and skin that I still held.

The second bang jolted me back. The pain in my head was no match for the pain in my heart. I turned in the direction of the sound and let out a howl.

The third and fourth bangs were even worse. In agony, I lunged at the man's throat. There was not a chance for retaliation. I cut into the main artery, a gush of blood covering me. The man slumped backwards, dead.

I did not stop to feast on him. I turned as soon as I knew that the life had left his body. I crept slowly forward.

Lauren's eyes were open. She had been wounded three times. Once in the shoulder - a mild hit. Another time in the chest. A more serious attack. A deadly hit judging from the amount of blood that gushed forth.

The third...the third was in the stomach. She looked at me and whimpered. Her breath was already leaving her body. I nuzzled her. With her last bit of strength she turned my head and whimpered again.

I knew what she wanted me to do, but I didn't know if I could bring myself to do it. I shook my head; the movement made it ache.

It wasn't until she tossed back her head for one last howl that I knew. No matter the damage, this was her will. I hovered by her bloated stomach, the bullet hole buried deep. I didn't know what I was going to find, but I didn't waste time.

I grabbed the outer layer of skin and fur and tugged.

Death came instantly. I didn't stop. I saw the protectory of the bullet and went through from there.

The first two young I retrieved were dead. The bullet grazed through both of their bodies. They were wolf. Nothing more than wolf.

The third...the third was small. It was weak. It's paws slapped at the ground but I sensed it had no chance for survival. I pressed my paw against its head. A quick snap and it was done.

The fourth that I came across was smooth human skin. I struggled to pull it out without my teeth sinking in. It was covered in blood and fluid. It did not breath.

Somehow I could not give up on this one as easily. I pressed my snout to its chest, pressing lightly. I licked its face. I nudged it first gently, then harder.

The cry told me it was all for nothing. It was male. It was loud. I glanced up at the sky.

We were in an alley. I gently took the newborn in my jaw, hiding behind a dumpster. From there I kept watch as the time ticked away. If anyone chanced to come down the alley before morning they would meet a fate similar to the man.

The man that had killed my mate. I slammed my head against the cold metal back of the dumpster and whimpered. The child began to cry. I could not comfort it.

The moment I sensed the coming of dawn, I brought the child back out to Lauren and nestled it next to her front paws. I stuck the three dead pups in a small hole in the side of the building. By the time they would be found they'd be bones. When my job was done, I returned to Lauren's side. I sat for a moment, my head lowered. I licked her face one last time. I stared at the child.

If my simplistic plan worked, I would see it in mere hours. With heavy heart, I ran from the alley.

I ran back towards home. I ran faster than I ever thought possible. Even so, I transformed just seconds before I made it to the back door. I was covered in blood. I was naked. I didn't care.

I ran to the bathroom and yanked the sprays on. I opened my mouth and let the water flood inside.

Then I began to cry.

Chapter Twelve

"Nick Carter?"

I nodded. I stared out at the two officers standing outside my bashed in front door. I knew exactly why they were here.

It still didn't make it any easier.

"We wanted to follow up on your call early this morning about the break-in at your house and your girlfriend's disappearance."

"Did you find her?" I asked. My voice tightened.

The older of the two officers stepped forward. As was probably routine, he took off his hat, his face framed in sympathy.

"I'm sorry to tell you this, son, but she was found dead this morning."

I knew it. I was there. But to hear the words---

I sank to the floor and began to cry all over again.

"You mentioned in your call that she was pregnant?"

I nodded.

"A baby was found at the scene. Alive."

"Alive?" I whispered. Thank you.

"Crime lab is still working on everything, but it appears that she might have been abducted from the house and taken into an alley where the attacker tried to remove the child."

I blanched. "Why?" I whispered.

"Child abduction ring."

"But how--"

I was playing along with their story. It seemed better than the truth. My cheeks felt raw from the endless tears that had poured out of my eyes.

"There was signs of an animal attack. A coyote perhaps."

"Coyote?"

"We usually require a body identification, but...we were able to match Lauren's fingerprints."

I nodded absently. The officer knelt down and touched my shoulder.

"The baby was taken to the hospital."

"Which hospital?"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Mr. Carter, I'm so sorry for your loss."

The nurse walked beside me, her soft shoes making no noise at all. "The baby looks about full term. He suffered some minor scratches..."

We rounded the corner. The room was small. A nurse hovered over the bassinet. She looked up; her eyes filled with sympathy.

"I'm so sorry to hear about your girlfriend."

My eyes didn't stray from the bassinet. I leaned over looking at the baby I had ripped from his mother's womb just this morning. His arms and face were covered from light scratches.

Scratches his siblings had probably given him. I leaned down and stroked his face.

"Do you want a few moments?"

I nodded. "Yes please," I said quietly.

Both nurses left the room. I scooped the baby out of the bassinet.

"What a night," I said softly. I sank into the rocking chair and stared down at him.

The baby's hair was dark; the same color as Lauren's. His eyes looked up at me in confusion.

I didn't know what I was going to do. I couldn't take care of a baby alone. Lauren and I hadn't asked for any of this to happen.

This baby didn't ask for any of this.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"How did this happen?"

"We didn't find out until recently. Lauren had been on bed rest. We were going to tell everyone after..."

"I'm so sorry."

It was the line of the day. I stared at Brian; my eyes had no more tears to give. I had shed the last when Lauren's mom had come up to the hospital.

"Have you given him a name?"

"No. I...I don't think I can do this."

"Of course you can. Lauren would have wanted you to."

I knew he was right. Lauren's last request was for me to deliver the babies. She would never have forgiven me.

"Bri, you know me. I'm not mature enough."

"Seems to me you've matured a lot lately."

I didn't know if it was so much maturity as it terror, anger, and anguish. I let my head fall back against the rocker pad. I swallowed hard.

"Leighanne and I will be more than happy to help you," Bri continued. "I didn't know squat either before we had Bay."

"Yeah, but your squat tends to be better than my squat."

Bri snorted. "Naw. I have a feeling your gonna de-squat fast."

I laughed. For just a split second it felt like old times. We had started off having a serious conversation only to end with utter nonsense. I stared back down at the baby.

"Do you like the name Riley?"

"Are you asking me or the baby? 'Cause babies can't talk Nick."

"Shut up. I know that."

"Okay, well in that case it sounds like Baylee."

I gave him a dirty look. Bri held up his hands. He was wearing a bright pink Wylee shirt that was hurting my eyes. "What?"

"Okay. What about Camden?"

"Camden? Where in the world did that come from?"

"Where in the world did Baylee come from?"

"It's a normal name!"

"Not the way you spell it!"

"We wanted to be original."

"And?"

"Camden's good," Bri said quickly. "Are you going to think of a middle name?"

"Another name? Jesus."

"Well all you get is one out of three. Didn't you and Lauren--"

I winced. Bri lowered his head. "Sorry. I shouldn't have--"

"She liked Tyler," I said.

"Okay. So Camden Tyler Carter. That's got a nice ring."

At that moment, Camden yawned. I touched his hand.

I was really going to do this.

"It's just you and me, Cam."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The viewing was closed casket. A beautiful picture of Lauren in a gold gilt frame adorned a shimmering white casket. It looked like a pearl.

The room was packed. Besides the guys and Lauren's parents, I couldn't tell you who was there. I longed to see her face one last time. Obviously my suspicion that night had been correct. Come morning, she had still transformed back into her human form.

I clung to Camden like my life depended on it. He was a spectacle in and of itself. People couldn't believe that Lauren had been pregnant. They had seen her just two...three months before. How could this beautiful baby boy be resting comfortably in my arms?

AJ had come up with my best excuse. I had never pictured him as the type, but obviously he watched a LOT of TLC. His theory was that Lauren had been a prime candidate for the show 'I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant.'

Maybe she could have been. If she had lived long enough. I could barely look at Howie.

He was the one that had kept me late. If I had just left...

Lauren would still be alive.

There were moments when I could completely function if I just threw myself into the daily duties of taking care of Camden. The nights were the hardest. My sleep was plagued with nightmares replaying the whole scene. I kept waking up in cold sweats.

Time was malicious. I was angry at the world. I had to find a way to fix myself. I knew I could depend on Bri and Leigh to watch Camden during the next moon and probably the ones that followed.

But I didn't want to go through life like this. I was a monster.

There had to be a fix.

Chapter Thirteen

There's not much that a three-and-a-half week old baby does, but what they do, they do EXTRA well. Camden cried constantly. When he wasn't crying he was eating. Or pooping. It was like a cycle. Cry, eat, poop, cry, eat, poop. Interspersed in between was very little sleeping for the both of us.

My intention the moment I had laid eyes on Cam was to find a solution. Unfortunately, just taking care of a baby wiped every bit of energy out of me. I knew the guys were chomping at the bit to keep recording, but they were respecting my need to heal.

As if I would ever heal from what I had experienced.

My nerves began to fray even more as the next full moon approached. I had already arranged for Brian and Leighanne to watch him. I had mentioned that I wanted to spend the day at Lauren's grave.

It was partially true.

The one bright spot in this whole murky time was that Cam was healthy and, for all intensive purposes, normal. My fear was that he would grow at the rapid speed in which Lauren's pregnancy had accelerated. Instead, at his first check-up, he was actually small on the scale. No one said it, but I knew part of it was lack of Lauren's presence. It wasn't like I could grow tits and become part cow.

I was already a wolf. No need to add any more animals to the roster.

My protectiveness for Cam seemed to intensify each and every day. The humanistic part of my mind realized I was holding a grudge against Howie. I had yet to let him come over. I knew that the animalistic part of me wanted to tear him apart: revenge for keeping me late.

The night before the full moon, I stocked up on steaks and paced the house. Cam was asleep in his swing; a rare moment. His mouth was open, his puckery little lips quivering every now and then. His brown hair tufted up on his crowd, looking more like fuzz than actual hair.

It was the first time in a month I had experienced any type of long silence. I picked up my laptop, blowing a light layer of dust off of the shiny top. I sank down on the couch, my foot tapping the swing lightly to keep it rocking, and powered it on.

My searches were more of the same - werewolves, legend, cure, Germany. I reread what I had already pulled up before and followed links I hadn't given a second thought.

Time flew by as I continued to hunt for answers. After about the twentieth page, I was about to give up. I convinced myself to look at just one last link. It simply said 'Adele.' I figured it would be a bust.

It turned out to be quite the opposite. My eyes widened.

Adele - Mother Wolf

Circa 1750. An interesting case of lore. Ten women were found guilty of adultery in the small town of Schwdbisch. The eleventh, the ringleader, was a breathtaking blonde prostitute that was only known by her first name, Adele. The ten married women, in desperation, explained that they had been bewitched by Adele to perform immoral acts once a month that they did not fully remember. These ten women were sentenced to a lifelong shunning from their community and forced to leave husbands and children behind. After a fierce chase, Adele was captured and sentenced to death by beheading on the next full moon.

Sketchy historical documents from the time reveal mixed reports concerning the events that occured on the eve of Adele's beheading. Some claimed witchery was at hand. Others claimed that the devil himself arrived on earth. Other reports provide amazing detail, even if the final explanation could not be comprehended. These reports are the ones that will be discussed here.

One witness, who was towards the front of the crowd, describes a terrible transformation. Adele, her face shrouded, her hands bound, was brought to the device that meant her doom. The sun was sinking fast; many mentioned the tense silence of the moment.

The executioner pressed Adele's head down. It nestled in the wood block that would hold her still. She was given the opportunity to say a last prayer; she remained silent.

It is mentioned by two witnesses that the hoot of an owl began the reign of terror. As night's shadow fell over the crowd and lanterns were held up to better see, a loud noise erupted from Adele. The shroud covering her head ripped as a monsterous creature took form where moments before a beautiful woman had stood.

The creature was described as being over six foot tall standing. The hair was long and gold. The face was elongated. A snout held rows of glistening white teeth. Sharp claws extended from paws on the four legs.

Women in the crowd fainted; men scrambled for weapons. The creature dropped to all fours, a loud howl renting the air.

From the forest that surrounded the town, ten dark wolves emerged from the dense foliage. The first victims were those members of the jury that had condemned the women and sentenced Adele to death. The rest of the victims were other women in the town. Some were wrenched from the arms of their husbands. Other husbands ran in fear, leaving their wives defenseless.

For the next twenty years, reports abounded from husbands who swore their wives came back for sexual conquest several times a month. As the rumor became more widespread, these men began to disappear.

Twenty-five years to the day that the failed beheading and bloody attack occured, the last survivor of the town moved away with his children. The town of Schwdbisch ceased to exist.

People today claim that it is to risk's one's life if you're brave enough (or dumb enough) to walk through the Schwdbisch forest on a full moon. Rumor has it that Adele, the mother wolf, still lives today. The rumor has been enhanced over the years. Some say that Adele's sexual prowess comes from her desire to turn innocent men in the hopes of finding her true mate - the male Golden Wolf.

Some conspiracy theorists believe that if Adele does turn a man into the Golden Wolf, it will signal the coming of the apocalypse. Others believe that if the male Golden Wolf can kill Adele, recent victims can be returned to pure human form while older victims may finally find peace in death.

Note: All werewolves are believed to have light brown to black fur. Besides Adele, no other record of golden wolves exist.

My stomach clenched. I re-read the same page at least three times. Each time, I felt sick.

Was it just a story? Or was it real? Either option scared the crap out of me. If it was just a story, I was still no closer to finding a solution.

If it was real, then---then there was a very good chance I was this so- called male 'Golden Wolf.' If so, I was this ancient woman's boy-toy. Had she turned me?

The only glimmer of hope was that nowhere in the passage did it say that Adele couldn't be killed. The only question was...how?

Camden's screams forced me away from the haunting information. I knelt down and scooped up his little body. I held him to my chest and inhaled the scent of baby powder.

I had a son now. I couldn't go flying off to Germany on a whim. I had responsibility. I had--

I had fur on the tops of my hands. I could already feel the itching beginning in my back. I cursed loudly.

I couldn't keep living this way.

Chapter Fourteen

"He needs fed every four hours. His favorite pacifier is the blue one with music notes. When you change him you've got to sing Itsy Bitsy Spider. And--"

"Nick, I'm a dad. I know this stuff. Don't worry."

That was easier said then done. Leighanne was rocking Cam, cooing down at him with that sappy look that babies seem to bring out of even the coldest people. Bri was looking at the arsenal of stuff I had brought over, grinning.

"This is just overnight, right? Not forever?"

"Just for tonight," I said. "Why? Did I bring too much stuff?"

Bri laughed. "Maybe a little."

I glanced back over at Cam. I could hear his coos, magnetized in my rapidly sensitizing ears. I hated leaving him, but I couldn't have him around. I didn't trust myself anymore. Now that I had tasted blood...

"So, does he do anything weird?"

"Weird?"

Leighanne laughed. "Yeah. Babies always have quirks."

I didn't know how to respond. Should I worn them that there might be a slim chance Camden might become covered with fur and try to bite them with little wolf teeth?

Nah.

"No quirks. He's perfect," I said lovingly. I walked over and nuzzled my face close to Cam's. I had shaved my hands right before we left, but I could already feel the hair. I gave him a swift kiss.

"Be good. I'll be back tomorrow morning," I whispered. His bright blue eyes stared back up at me. He smiled.

"Thanks again," I said. I straightened up.

Bri waved his hand. "No problem." His eyes softened. "Try to keep yourself busy, Nick. Don't...don't stay there too long."

I nodded. Bri knew I was going to visit Lauren's grave. That was all he knew.

"I promise," I said, backing up towards the door. "Have fun."

Bri lifted his hand in a wave. I didn't return the gesture.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"He's gorgeous, Laur. He looks a lot like you. He's got your hair. He smiled at me today," I said. I was laying next to her grave, my eyes tracing the curve of her name on the ornate stone. The grass hadn't yet grown over the fresh earth. I pressed my hand to the soil, feeling the dirt slid under my nails.

"I think I found a lead," I continued. I was talking to keep the tears at bay. "There's a legend from Germany about werewolves. I haven't told Bri or any of the guys, but as soon as tonight's over, I'm taking Cam with me. We're going to be MIA for a couple weeks."

The wind whistled by my ear. I had been at her grave for a couple hours and I couldn't seem to tear myself away. The sun was drifting below the trees. I knew I needed to go.

But knowing and doing are two different things.

"Nick!"

I jumped. I hadn't thought I would hear my name. For a second, I thought it was a ghost. But the voice was too familiar. The voice...

"Nick."

The voice was softer this time. Howie swung out from behind a tree. He was holding a bouquet of flowers. He didn't say anything else until he knelt down, crossed himself, and placed the bouquet at the head of Lauren's stone.

"I can't believe it's been a month."

My eyes burned. I didn't know what to say. I scrambled up. We were face to face.
B "I'm sorry," Howie whispered. "I feel so bad for keeping you late. I keep thinking what if--"

I saw the moisture build up in his warm brown eyes. I let out a shuddery breath. "I blamed you and I shouldn't have. You had no idea--"

"Neither did you."

I shook my head. "I did."

"Nick, no you didn't. How could you--"

I tried to explain. I really did. The sun just set too fast. I guess I didn't realize that the sun set earlier and earlier after the Summer Solstice. D was still waiting for my answer when I lunged forward.

"RUN!" I managed to scream before I felt momentarily strangled due to the shifting of my face.

Howie should have run. He shouldn't have sat there in terror as I changed. But he did. It was only after my sharp yellow eye fell on him that he crab-crawled backwards.

"Nick...Nick...no."

Nick didn't understand what he meant. Did he mean that it was impossible what he had just seen? Did he suddenly think I was the one that had killed Lauren?

All I knew was that he smelled incredible. I growled, my eyes studying his scuffling feet. I lowered to the ground and began to stalk his way.

"No...No!"

I wondered if he tasted a little spicy. I could sense the pounding hot blood underneath his skin. A thick line of drool fell from my jaw onto my paw. I shook it off. Howie scrambled to his feet. I had never seen him so pale. He turned and ran.

The chase was on. This was instinct. Prey was conditioned to run. The stalker was conditioned to chase. My feet pounded fast, kicking up bits of earth. Howie swung around gravestones, running zig-zag. I'm not even sure he knew where his car was anymore.

There was no chance that I was going to lose him. His scent was marked. Only once did he seem to disappear. I stopped my chase, my ears turning slightly to pick up sounds on the breeze.

I heard his breath. He was trying to be quiet, but silence is impossible when in fear. My pace slowed. I knew I was moving so lightly that even the worms underneath wouldn't feel my vibrations. D was right behind a large tree. I could make out the curve of his fingers around the old bark.

It was the hand that my teeth clamped around first. Delicious blood burst into my mouth rendering my body completely over to instinct and hunger. The blood tasted much better than that of Lauren's shooter.

Howie's screams reached a heart-bursting crescendo. They stung my ears. I let his hand go. Howie was stunned. He stared at the stump, the blood still drifting in rivets. His mouth opened again. He was going to hurt my ears. I knelt and lunged at his throat. My ears were saved.

I devoured until I felt sick. I stared down at the mangled body, practically unidentifible. Panic washed over me. I had to get away.

There was no reason to go back to the house. The damage was already done. I ran to the ocean. The moon reflected in the water. Something about water and the transformation calmed me. I dove into the water, letting the salty liquid wash Howie's blood off of me. When I was nearing exhaustion, I crept up onto the sand. It didn't take long to dry.

Only when I knew the night was almost over did I head back home. I hadn't left my doors unlocked. I waited in the backyard until my body realigned back into human form. It was the first time I had noticed that the fur seemed to literally just sink back into my skin. I rubbed my face and stared at the yellow/pink light teasing the horizon.

I had just killed one of my best friends. I had just left James fatherless. I had been mad at Howie, but he had tracked me down to clear the air. Things were supposed to have been okay. But he had come too late.

I headed back into the house, Howie's mangled body stuck in my mind. Sometimes it merged with Lauren's own destroyed form. Two people connected to me dead in just two months. It was too suspicious.

I ran into my room and yanked open my closet. I didn't care what I threw in my open suitcase.

The only way to make things right was to find a fix. I couldn't wait another second. I needed to get Cam. I needed to get out of the country. I wouldn't return until I had found a way to stop this. No one else could die.

If Bri was still asleep, I'd break in and take the baby. I didn't want to answer any questions.

I just wanted to disappear.

Chapter Fifteen

"Oh he's adorable! How old is he?"

"He's a month old."

The stewardess smiled. "He must have his mommy's hair."

Tears burned behind my lids. "He does."

"Let me know if you two need anything, okay?"

"Thank you."

She walked farther down the row, chatting bubbily with the other first class passengers. My hands stroked the soft blanket Cam was nestled under.

I felt numb. The only thing linking me to the real world was Camden's bright eyes focused on me. His arms shifted beneath the blanket; one foot clad in a bright blue sock kicked its way out.

We had successfully managed one transfer and now our flight was headed directly to Germany. I had packed as much as I could for Cam; little for myself.

My thoughts kept returning to Howie. By now, Leigh had to have been frantic. I was sure she had called the police. I glanced at my watch. They might have even found his body by now.

I didn't know what was going to happen to me, but I did know that I couldn't return home even if I did manage to fix myself.

I couldn't face Brian and AJ. Not now. Not ever.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

After my passport was stamped and I had my luggage and Camden, I rented a car and a driver (I didn't have a GPS and there was no way I was going to get lost in a strange country). Our destination was roughly the same place that I had been attacked more than a year ago.

I couldn't understand German at all, but luckily the driver spoke broken English. It was late, the night gathered heavily around the little gray car zooming down the road.

"You sure you go here?" the driver asked.

"I'm sure," I said.

"Even with little?"

Camden was fussing; it was no easy task to feed a baby while in a moving car.

"Why? Is there something bad about here?"

The driver made a rumbling noise deep in his throat. "Wolfsmench."

I started. "Wolfsmench? What does that mean?"

The driver shook his head. "I don't...know...English..."

"Wolf?"

The driver sighed. "Wolfsmench...eh...Luzifer? Satan?"

"Satan?"

The trees were becoming significantly thicker outside the window. I felt a weird tug; a sort of longing.

"No matter," I said quietly. "This is where I need to be."

The driver, on my request, found the only lodging in the area: a rundown bed and breakfast. He stayed frozen behind the wheel as I gingerly put Cam back in his carseat and pulled out the luggage.

"Do you want to stretch your legs?" I asked.

The driver's eyes widened. "No."

I paid him for his time. He asked when I wished to return to the city; I did not answer. I clutched Camden tightly to my chest as the car screeched around and kicked up dust in the evening sky.

As soon as the car was completely gone, the door behind me opened. I turned, unsure of who or what I was going to meet.

The smallest, oldest lady I've ever seen peered out at me. She looked like a ladybug. Her gray hair was close to her head in tight curls; her back was stooped over and she clung to a red and black cane tightly.

"Do you...speak English?" I asked uncertainly.

Her eyes narrowed. She turned and spat rapid-fire German into the house. A second later another face appeared at the door.

Even in shadow, I could tell this face was much, much younger. The first thing that roped me in was the beautiful brown eyes. Her face was heart-shaped; her nose slightly turned up at the end. The older lady nudged her and pointed out at me.

"Can I help?"

I was relieved to hear English, as hesitant as it was.

"My son and I," I said, lifting the carseat slightly. "Need a place to stay."

The young woman's eyes rested on the carseat. She whispered something to the old lady. The old lady smacked her cane up and down three times on the packed floor and backed up.

"Come," the young one said.

I gathered the bags and clumsily made my way in, ducking in the low doorway.

The inside was just as plain as the outside. The only difference was the bright light from the fireplace and the shaded lamp in the corner. The old woman yanked open a large closet door and began to pull out sheets.

Now that the young woman was no longer in shadow, I was able to get a better look at her. The moment her eyes locked on mine, I knew I was doomed.

She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen in my whole life. Just staring at her erased everything else from my mind. She almost seemed to glow. When she flipped her light brown hair, I almost sank to my knees.

"You are hungry?" she inquired.

"I'm Nick," I said. She laughed.

"Neee-k? You are hungry?" she repeated.

The sound of my name on her lips made me gasp. I struggled to make sense of her question.

"I'm a little...a little hungry."

"The baby?"

Cam was fast asleep. I touched his pudgy chin with my thumb.

"He's fine."

She came over and I was overwhelmed with her closeness. She leaned down, touching the blanket.

"Wunderhübsch," she said gently.

"Excuse me?"

She smiled. "Beautiful."

Before I could say anything, the old woman started screeching. The girl turned and ran to her aid. I sank down in a chair.

I was exhausted. I hadn't slept in two days. I ran a hand through my hair, feeling dirty and grimy.

As I had thought, I had to break one of Bri's windows and take Camden out. I didn't chance waking them. Luckily, Camden hadn't stirred. I had run home, thrown things together...

And now I was here.

"You see your room? Then eat?"

The beautiful woman stood in the doorway. I quickly tried to find one flaw in her features; I saw none.

"What's your name?" I asked. I didn't move.

"Elsabeth," she replied. "You call me El."

I smiled. "Absolutely."

Her eyes drifted to the floor. "Your room?"

Once again I picked up the carseat and the bags. I followed El through what seemed like a labyrinth. From the outside, the house did not seem that big. Inside, it was a fortress.

"Here," she said. She opened the door.

The room was small and simple. It had an adjoining bathroom that held a shower, no tub. I was surprised to see a small crib.

"I didn't expect this," I said. El's eyes fell on Camden; her face softened.

"It was mine."

"Yours?"

She nodded. She suddenly seemed nervous. "You eat?"

I was suddenly starving. I dropped my bags. I rustled through things until I found one of those baby strap contraptions. Lauren had bought it; I had forgotten the right name for it. I put it on and slipped Cam in it. He complained for just a minute.

I'm sure he would have given anything to be pressed up against an actual boob.

El smiled and turned to lead the way back to the kitchen. I pressed my palm to Camden's warm head.

I knew my first duty was to protect him. Whether or not staying in a house with a grumpy old woman and a possible syren was the best choice, I didn't know.

But at the moment, it was the only choice.

Chapter Sixteen

Even though I was in a strange place, I had slept better than I had in months. Camden must have been feeling the effects of the jet lag; for seven straight hours he was peaceful. Hunger and wetness got the best of him and his cries pulled me out of a weird state. I couldn't call it a dream, but to describe it as a nightmare would have been wrong as well.

I had dreamt I was walking through a forest barefoot. Even as I picked Cam out of the crib, I could almost feel the moss between my toes. El was walking beside me, a vision of beauty. The sun was sinking low and the last streams of light stole through the thick canopy of trees overhead. We walked until we found out way to an open, perfectly circular, area that was flanked on all sides by trees. The floor looked like a plush green bed. El sank to her knees, her eyes beseeching me to do the same. As I sank down, she brought her lips to mine.

The dream was just getting very good (and very naked) when all of a sudden a hundred loud howls filled the air and we were surrounded on all sides by wolves. The leader of the pack, a wolf with long blonde hair, stalked forward. It eyes were fixed on El. I remember shielding her behind me, but it was no use. The wolf licked its jowls and lunged. The moment it did so, every single wolf raced forward.

That was when Cam had started to cry.

I was still mulling over the dream as I changed Cam's diaper. He looked up at me and for a second I thought he just might smile. Instead, his stomach rumbled uneasily. I scooped him up and pulled out one of the large containers of formula I had brought with me.

I was in the kitchen, Cam gurgling at the sight of the bottle yet to come, when El walked in. Her hair was plaited down her back and accentuated all the perfections of her face. I smiled as I shook the bottle in my hand.

"Hi," I said.

"Guten Morgen," she said. She took out a basket of eggs. "Would you like breakfast?" she said in perfect English. I looked at her in surprise.

"What did you say?"

She looked startled. "I...uh...you eat?" she mumbled.

"You speak better English than that. I just heard you," I said suspiciously. Her face turned an even deeper shade of scarlet.

"I know," she admitted.

With Cam's mouth already open and trying to focus on the bottle that I held just out of reach, he began to wiggle. I sat down in an old chair, stirring up about a hundred year's worth of dust. I stuck the bottle in his mouth and he began to eat.

"Have you lived here all your life?" I asked.

El turned and began to crack eggs. She didn't answer.

"Is that woman your grandmother?"

She opened the refrigerator and pulled out a glass bottle of milk.

"How old are you?"

A long stick of butter resting in a handmade glass dish emerged next. My patience wore thin.

"Are you going to talk to me?" I asked angrily.

When she pulled out a fork and began to whisk, it took everything in me not to stand up and stop her. If it wasn't for Camden's apparent need to suck his bottle dry, I think I would have. Instead, I decided on a different line of questioning.

"Is the Schwdbisch forest around here?"

At the mere mention of the word 'Schwdbisch,' El dropped her fork. She held onto the counter and I saw her take a deep breath.

"Why?" she asked.

"I want to go for a walk this afternoon," I said pleasantly. "I heard it was a lovely area."

"You can't go," she said simply.

"Why not?" I demanded.

The night before at dinner was when I first became suspicious of the beautiful girl. The old lady ate messily and she rambled on in German and expected me to respond. She could have been plotting my murder, but I still nodded my head.

El, on the other hand, was quiet. Extremely quiet. I noticed that as the old lady and I ate an amazingly delicious stew that El picked at a piece of bloody meat.

My connection to her had begun to make sense at that point, but I hadn't mentioned anything. I was too tired and I hadn't felt the desire to get kicked out.

With the morning brought more boldness. El turned around, her eyes flashing.

"It's dangerous."

"What's dangerous? A walk?"

Her shoulders tightened. She turned and glanced out the window as if she expected to see someone peering in.

"Why did you come here?" she asked. She turned back to her eggs and began to whisk.

"Why did you come here?" I asked. By now she had talked enough perfect English for me to detect an East Coast accent. She was no more German-born than I was.

"College trip," she said simply, so simply that I sensed it was a lie.

"College?" I said in surprise. El looked nineteen...twenty at most. "How long ago was this?"

"Ten years," she said. I shook my head in disbelief. She knelt down and lit the stove with a match. I saw her toss a huge hunk of butter in the pan which sizzled merrily.

"Why'd you stay?"

Her long fingers flicked through a container holding a bunch of utensils. She plucked out a wooden spoon and began to scramble up the eggs. "I didn't have a choice."

"Why not?"

She didn't answer. Cam was whimpering, his bottle empty. He kept sucking, but all he got was air. I set the bottle on the table and brought him to my shoulder. He let out a loud belch just as El put two large servings of scrambled eggs on the plates. She set one before me and the other directly across from my seat. She went back to the refrigerator and pulled out some orange juice. Only after she sat down, did she begin to speak.

"If you go in these woods, you will die," she said.

"These woods? You mean Schwdbisch forest is right here?" I asked.

"It's about a mile down," she said uneasily.

"Why will I die? Obviously you didn't," I said with a smile. I cradled Cam and picked up my fork. El's lips didn't even twitch.

"I've experienced worse than death," she said sullenly.

"I don't understand," I said softly.

El took a tiny bite of eggs. She got up and returned with a bottle of red sauce. At first I thought it was tobacco, but the moment she uncapped it I smelled a pungent aroma of blood.

"My parents sent me here," she said. "I got pregnant my sophmore year of college. They told everyone I was going abroad for school."

"But you didn't?"

El took another bite and seemed satisfied. "I was to have the baby here. My parents knew a German couple who wanted to adopt. I was seven months pregnant when I came here."

"And the crib?"

El finally smiled, but it was a sad smile. She took another bite and washed it down with some juice. "The old lady, Ingrid, she didn't understand that I wouldn't be keeping the baby. She pulled that crib out of the attic and put it in my room. I had to look at it every night."

"That seems cruel," I said. I shifted Cam into my other arm and picked up my fork awkwardly.

"She meant well. After a month of helping her with this place I began to think that I might just keep the baby. Ingrid told me I could stay here. It didn't hold a lot of opportunity, but I thought at least for a few years..."

She trailed off.

"So what happened?"

El twirled the small red bottle around. She lifted her eyes to mine. "I went for a walk in the woods."

I couldn't wait for her to continue. She had told me enough for me to guess what happened next.

"You were attacked," I surmised. "You became one of them?"

El's lips parted. Her eyes grew moist.

"How do you know..."

"I'm one of them, too," I said. "I was attacked about a year ago."

El's eyes flickered to Camden. "But..."

I gave El the short version of my story, leaving out Howie's death. I couldn't talk about it. I didn't even want to think about it, but that was impossible.

"He lived," she said softly. "You saved him." I had noticed the hunger in her eyes last night when she looked at Cam and it was still there this morning. He was sleeping, his little fist pressed up next to his mouth. I drew him up for a light kiss.

"He's the only piece of her I have left," I said brokenly.

"A handsome man with dark hair stopped me in the forest," El mumbled. Obviously her mind had plunged her back into memory. "He flattered me and I was drawn to him. It was getting late but he kept telling me five more minutes." She ran the back of her hand across her face to brush away the tears. "When he changed I didn't have time to run. I don't remember much, but I must have gone into labor. When I woke up..."

She trailed off. I didn't say a word.

"When I woke up, he was eating my baby."

El began to openly weep. She clutched her hands into fists and banged them on the table.

"I've been like this for ten years," she gasped. "Oh my God...oh my God..."

Watching her fall apart drummed up all of the emotions I had kept inside and the memories of all of the turmoil I had put Lauren through. I stood up and came to El's side. I placed my free hand on her shoulder.

"I'm here to end this," I said.

"I can help you."

The words sounded so confident; I just hoped they were true.

Chapter Seventeen

Here's a fun fact about me and crying girls. When a girl sobs in my presence, everyone automatically assumes that it's my fault they're crying in the first place. Even in a foreign country, I couldn't escape that stigma.

Ingrid, the grumpy little old lady, chose the exact moment when El was falling apart to enter the kitchen. El was crying so loudly that it masked the sound of the woman's cane hitting the hard floor. Ingrid glared at my hand around the young girl's shoulder, pointed her finger at me, and began to yell.

El pulled herself together, grabbing a few rough napkins and dabbing at her face. Her tongue let loose a barage of German. The two women argued back and forth for several terse moments. I inched towards the hall leading back to my room.

I was torn in what my next move should be. On one hand, I wanted to go marching into the forest with knife and gun and enact my revenge. I wanted to go all 'Kill-Bill' on every single one of those werewolves. I didn't want to have to spend my life thinking desiring blood and guts(or worrying about fleas). On the other hand, if I did something stupid that would leave Camden an orphan.

I was beginning to regret my decision of bringing Cam with me. He would have had a much better life with Brian and Leighanne. There was no doubt in my mind that they would have spoiled him rotten...and probably given him two more middle names.

Even though that would have been the mature decision, when I put him down in the old wooden crib and looked down in his face, I knew I had made the right decision. I propped my chin on the rail and sighed.

"Whatever happens, know I love you, okay?" I whispered. Camden yawned, his eyes drooping closed.

"Nick?"

I turned. El stood in the doorway, wringing a faded apron in her hands.

"Come in," I said. She walked in, her eyes studying the crib.

"This thing is an antique," I said, for lack of anything better to say.

"Ingrid told me it was her daughter's," El said quietly.

"She has a daughter?"

"I suppose so," El said. "I've never met her."

She ended up right beside me, both of us looking down at Cam. Slowly she put her fingers on my forearm.

"How do you think you can fix this?"

I looked into El's eyes and, not for the first time, I lost myself for a moment. I didn't know whether the curse just made her seem more beautiful, but I highly doubted it. She had a natural essence about her.

"I think..." I trailed off. "I think I'm the golden wolf."

The fear that contorted her face sent shivers down my spine. "You..."

"When I turn, I'm golden. I read somewhere that it's rare."

"It's rarer than rare. Are you sure it's not light brown..."

"I'm sure."

El pulled her fingers away. "Do you realize that if she finds her mate..."

"I'm aware. I also know I'm the only one that can stop it."

"But, I don't think you understand. She is beautiful. More beautiful than anything you can even imagine."

"More beautiful than you?" I asked quickly. A fast spreading blush stained her cheeks. "I'm not--"

"You are," I said. "And trust me, I'm an expert in the field. I know a beautiful girl when I see one."

El didn't argue, but I could tell she didn't believe me. "How are you going to approach her and the clan?"

"How many are there?" I asked.

"I spent six months with them when this first happened," she explained. "As you know, men take a year to transform. For a woman, its almost instantaneous. Besides Adele, the leader, there are ten other head female wolves. Any woman that is bitten by Adele or these ten must answer to them. The males are at the very bottom."

"So I'm dealing with a whole bunch of feminists," I said sarcastically. "Great."

El didn't look amused. I rubbed my neck and settled down on the end of my bed. "How many all together do you think there are?"

"The numbers pretty much stay the same. Only two or three are brought in each year and almost the same amount are killed for disobediance. I would say a hundred."

"A hundred? You mean to tell me there are a hundred werewolves packed in the forest?"

"It's a bigger place than you think," El said. "I've traveled every square inch."

"Why did you stay with them even after they killed your child?" I asked. El reached down into the crib and I could tell she was stroking Camden's hair.

"I had no choice. I was scared. Besides, being in Adele's presence has a hypnotic effect. Besides, the wolf that changed me declared possession over me."

"I thought you said men were below all?"

"This one was different. I don't know why, but Adele favored him."

"How did you escape?"

"It was simple really. I left on one of my assigned missions and never came back. I still feel the pull during the full moon, but it's gotten easier. I told Ingrid everything and she took me in."

"And you trust her?"

El looked at me angrily. "She's protected me for more than nine years. Of course I trust her."

I couldn't argue with that. El lifted her hand from the crib. "Besides, she'll be the one to watch Camden while I bring you to Adele."

"While you bring me to---now wait just a minute."

"Do you expect to go in there and take them all down? You'll be a dead man."

I hadn't seen this side of her before and I wasn't sure if I liked it. I preferred the meek girl who pretended she didn't know English.

"What makes you think they'll go easier on me if I'm with you? Didn't you say you ran off?"

"No matter. I'm still one of them," she said. "Since I'm bringing them what they want, I'm sure they'll forgive me."

"What they want?"

"The legend of the male Golden Wolf is drilled into our heads from the moment we are turned. Any woman who brings him into Adele's midst will be revered. After all, that's what our missions are all about. Bringing in men."

I thought about the legend, specifically the part about the women who were charged with prostitution. I couldn't imagine El lowering herself that far just to bring her catch to slaughter. It showed me yet another new side of her that I didn't like.

"Are you setting me up?" I asked. El let out a throaty noise of indignation.

"You need an allegiance. I'm all you've got."

"I don't trust Ingrid," I said. "I can't leave Cam with him."

"Would you rather take him with you?"

The implication hung in the air, untangible but perfectly clear.

I didn't have any other choice.

"I better show her how to make the formula."

Chapter Eighteen

"You told me about an assigned mission earlier," I said. "What missions did you run?"

El and I were walking down a narrow dirt path leaded from the back of the bed and breakfast. My pulse was racing; I had just left my son with a lady who was older than dirt. The only benefit was that it made me want to get this over with even quicker.

"You obviously know the legend," El said. "You know what the women were accused of."

I ran through the story in my mind. "Prostitution?"

El nodded. "Adele and the ten elders have long grown tired of finding just mates. They adore the taste of human flesh. Believe it or not, there's a major highway about five miles west of here. A truck stop had just been built up around the time I came. It's the easiest place to find new bodies."

"So you slept with gross, sweaty truck drivers?" I asked increduously. She stopped and turned. My shoes ground into the gravel as I stopped my body from moving forward. "Does that bother you?" she shot back.

"You just deserve better than that," I said quickly.

"What would you consider better?"

This was ridiculous. We were on the outskirts of the thick trees; the smell was overpowering. I knew they were in there.

"I'm better," I said. She laughed.

"That's what you all think," she said a little bitterly. With the fastest reflexes I had ever seen, she twisted and disappeared between two very tall, thin trunks that seemed to have grown so close together that no human person could get through. I pressed my hand into the bark and tried to squeeze. My ass was getting in the way.

Why did I have to be born with a 'Winnie the Pooh' ass?

"You could just walk around," she said quietly. She was standing only feet away in a bare circle of dirt, seemingly amused. I pulled my body back out. Sure enough, there was a clear trail to the right. I walked around and headed towards her.

"So what's the plan?" I whispered. "You sexed me up at the truck stop and now you're bringing me in as bait?"

El crossed her arms. Maybe it was my imagination, but the closer we had walked to the forest, the bolder she had become. Now, surrounded my trees, I felt a magnetic pull in my gut that was undeniable.

"You're defenses are already down," she said. "How are you going to resist Adele if you can't stop staring at my chest?"

Crap. I hadn't realized I was staring at her chest. I glanced up. The small rays of sun that were breaking through the trees were playing a shadow dance on the forest floor.

"I'm sorry, just give me a minute," I said. My mind had gone too far south, literally. I conjured up those images that would bring my wall of steel back: Lauren, the dead wolf pups, Howie...

"Okay," I said coldly. "Let's go." I don't know if you've ever seen Pirates of the Carribean 2, but if you have, I'm sure you remember the heart in the chest scene. If you do, you can understand my description of walking deeper into the forest. The closer we got to the epicenter, the more I became sensitized. Even though I had never consciously met her, I could sense Adele. She was waiting, always waiting.

For me.

I wasn't quite sure how far out we were, but El's steps seemed to get slower and slower until she was barely moving at all. The trees were rapidly thinning out.

"We're here," she whispered. Her voice sounded funny, but I assumed it was nerves. Who knew if she really would be accepted back in, even if she was bringing the male golden wolf to her leader?

It seemed like we crossed an invisible threshold when we entered the large circle of packed earth. It was obvious that it was a meeting place. Logs were placed in a semi-circle as benches. In the center was a large bon-fire structure, new wood had alreay been placed over charred cinders. A gigantic flat rock was positioned to the right side of the fire. A large throne-like structure was on the left.

"Wow," I said softly.

El walked forward slowly. I watched her eyes dart around the circle. She headed towards the throne and her palm slid along the back of it.

"Where is everyone?" I asked.

"They must be out," she said. She turned around just as I came up directly behind her. She looked up at me and once again I couldn't not notice the rise and fall of her chest. It seemed like her breath was coming more rapidly. The nerves were getting to her.

"It's going to look strange if we're just standing here waiting," she said in a rush. Color was rising to her cheeks.

"Do we go back out and hide?" I asked. She shook her head.

"No, if they think I've brought them a goodie..." she trailed off. Her eyes flickered over to the large slab of rock. "They'll expect me to be doing my job."

"Doing your..." I trailed off as I got a better look at the rock. It was the length of a bed.

"We just have to look like we're about to," she added.

"I can look like we're about to," I agreed.

I didn't want to admit it to her, but it was getting harder to keep the thought of dead bodies in my mind when she was standing there and I could feel the warmth radiating from her body. "Okay," she said after a beat, as if reconfirming to herself the plan of action. She took my wrist and led me over to the rock. She grabbed the bottom of my shirt and I raised my arms. She pulled it off and paused. I watched as she ran a finger down the center of my chest. I sucked in a breath as she went to work on my belt.

She moved quickly. Jeans were discarded, boxers were next.

"There seems to be an uneven distribution of clothing," I said quietly, clad only in my socks.

"Does this make it better?" she asked. She wiggled out of the jeans she was wearing. She had great legs. A gust of warm air hit my back, making me even warmer than I was already getting.

"Better," I said.

"Take off your socks," she said. "Having socks on is just weird."

I sat down on the rock, grateful that it wasn't as cold as I thought it was going to be on bare skin and pulled off my socks while she pulled off hers. She studied me for a second before pulling off her top. There was no bra underneath.

"Oh!" I interjected. She pressed her palm on my chest and down I went as she straddled me.

"So we're just pretending," I repeated. My hands wrapped around her hips. She nodded.

"Just pretending," she said.

"How can we pretend when you're still wearing panties?" I asked. I looped my thumbs around the narrow waistband.

"In media res," she said. I stared up at her in confusion. "What?"

"It means in the middle of things," she said.

"I could be in the middle of things better without you wearing this," I said. Her lips curved into a smile. "If you say so."

She backed away from me and I watched the last article of clothing disappear.

Now, I'm sure I know what you're thinking. A rational person wouldn't want to encounter his enemy at his most vulnerable, right?

Right. Unfortunately, I wasn't thinking that at the moment. As she slid back over me, her nails digging into my shoulders, I was thinking in basic animalistic mating terms. She leaned down, her hair tickling my neck and drew her lips to mine.

I should have known then that something was wrong when our kiss deepened. Instead of the sweetness that I was expecting to inhale, I seemed to extract from her the taste of blood and dirt. My mind didn't process these things as wrong right away. After all, I had dabbled in my fair amount of blood. Instead, my body reacted in the only way it knew how.

Her legs tightened against my sides and she reached down and grabbed me. I gasped right into her mouth; she seemed to suck it greedily in.

My eyes had closed upon lip impact, but as I opened them once more I saw again the faint glow around her. My hands grabbed her breasts and her eyes darkened.

"Say you want me," she said.

I should have realized that the crunching noise that was trying to invade my senses over the pounding of my own blood meant trouble, but I didn't. She had already taken me in just barely and I was suddenly like a man starving for her.

"Say it," she repeated.

"I want you," I moaned. My head fell back and tilted slightly in the dip of the rock. As she brought herself down for me to fill her, my eyes caught sight of what had been going on around us during our primal exchange. I cried out.

At least seventy people had come out of nowhere. They were shoulder to shoulder, creating a human circle, leaving no way of escape. Each and every one was looking at El. I suddenly felt her fingers around my throat as her lower muscles tightened around my member. My whole body jerked up towards her uncontrollably, unable to stop the throws of sex.

"SONS AND DAUGHTERS!" she yelled in a raspy voice. "BOW BEFORE ME - AT LONG LAST YOUR LEADER HAS FOUND HER MATE! ALL HAIL THE GOLDEN WOLVES!"

My eyes were watering as I came to quick release; I saw every single one of the men and women kneel down, their fingers outstretched towards the center of the circle. El removed her fingers from my throat but she didn't get off of me.

El. AdELe.

"No!" I cried. She spread out over me; every inch of my body felt like it was on an invisible leash. I couldn't move. Her lips grazed my ear.

"Welcome home, darling."

Chapter Nineteen

It didn't really matter to men that I was surrounded by a hundred people who had just watched me have sex. No, what mattered to me was that the sweet innocence in El's face had been replaced with a cold, triumphant stare. She got up slowly, not bothering to put back on the clothes that I had helped to remove.

She began to walk towards the others. I sat up, my whole body shaking.

"Cherished brethren, today is the first day of the rest of our lives! It will not be much longer that we have to call this place our home! The world will be ours!"

I felt like I was watching a Harry Potter movie and the guy without a nose was giving a speech to all those dudes in skull masks. I grabbed my jeans and put them on, keeping one eye on her. Her back was towards me. I studied the circle of bodies. Two very tiny women were standing side by side. It looked like I could bowl them over without a problem. I slid my feet into my sneakers. There was no time for socks.

"With the birth of the first true Golden Wolves, our numbers and strength will grow exponentially! Starting tonight, there will be a full moon for thirty days straight. We will attack. Some we will turn, others we will kill. Prepare for the feast of a lifetime!"

She began to talk about sex and debauchery, but as far as I was concerned, I never wanted sex again. I just wanted to run.

Her back was still towards me when I broke into a bull run at my two small targets. My hands curled into fists and I was prepared to actually hit a woman or two if that's what it took. My shoulder connected hard with the first one, knocking her back slightly. The other took a swipe with her nails at my arm, but I still got through.

"GET HIM!" I heard El shriek.

The chase was on. Twigs crunched beneath my feet. I swung around the wide trunks of the trees, I swatted at large limbs. I was fast, my senses were on full alert. My worst fear was that in the time I had already spent in the forest, something had happened to Cam. The more I thought about the information El had given me, the more I could piece the truth together through the lies.

That old hag did have a daughter. The crib looked ancient because it was. Ingrid had to be Adele's mother. That would make the monster a billion years old, but then again she looked it.

And I had placed my son in her care.

With the thought gnawing in my gut, I lowered my head and charged. All around me, I heard heavy foot fall. I saw the edge of the forest. I was almost there when Ingrid stepped into the opening.

Cam was wailing in her arms.

I ran right up to her and grabbed her arm. For a frail old thing, her arms were like iron bars. She glared at me.

"If you run away from me, she will kill your son right now."

The voice was soft as silk. I tensed. Adele's body pressed against the back of mine, her hands looped around my waist. "If you come back like a good boy, we'll bring him with us. I guarantee his safety."

"I'm not bringing my son around a hundred wolves," I spat. I tried to pry her hands off, but they wouldn't move. I felt myself weakening again.

"With one little bite I can turn him. He will be in no danger."

"My son is not becoming...this," I growled.

"It is either that or he will die," Adele said impatiently. "Which is no matter to me. Soon you will have better sons to take pride in."

With all the strength I had left, I broke free from her. "I will never have sons with you. Or daughters. Or fleas. Or--"

She smiled. "You have no choice. By being so narrow-minded in trapping me, I managed to trap you. We are bonded together. You can not resist."

"Like hell I can't," I said.

The next few seconds were agony. My brain felt like it was splitting in half. She murmured something and touched her lips and my body moved against its own will. My mouth was on hers, engulfed in hot, desirious kisses. She looped her arms around my neck and turned her head even as my mouth died to be on hers again.

"Mother, bring me the child."

My body was suddenly forced into a slight stoop. El dropped her arms from my neck. I stared at her, my eyes pleading. "No."

"You have a choice," Adele said. "I bite him, I treat him as one of mine, and we all go back and introduce you to your subjects. Or---"

The old lady walked forward. Her fingers were making their way to Cam's pudgy little throat. I lowered my head and moaned. Death probably was the better answer for him, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't.

"Do it," I whipered to Adele.

I didn't look. She moved swiftly away from me. Moments later, Cam's cries grew in intensity. It sounded like he was being murdered. Then, just as suddenly as they had come on, they faded. I turned. He was nestled in Adele's arms. Her mouth was bloody. I glanced back down at him. His chest was rising and falling; he was asleep. Two light bite marks were visible on his upper leg.

"Come with me," she demanded. She nestled him to her breast and began to walk back into the forest. I felt the invisible chains loosen from my body. She was testing me, but it was a test that I'm sure she knew I would pass. I wasn't going to let Camden out of my sight. I followed her back towards the circle. I was flanked on all sides by the others.

"That was exciting!" Adele announced happily as we all returned. She sat down and put Cam across her lap. Her fingers stroked his hair. She glanced at me and I felt a burning sensation start in my stomach.

"Can you feel it?" she whispered.

I wasn't sure what she meant until I saw just the slightest start of hair on my hands. I glanced up at the sky. It was one of those weird late afternoons when you could actually see the moon already appearing in the sky. It was full.

"Thirty straight days," she said excitedly. "It begins tonight. While our legion brings us food and more numbers, we will make love. We will take care of our pup."

She began rambling like a mad-woman. The others were feeding off her excitement; they were getting restless. She handed Cam off to one of the other women and motioned towards me. My feet moved without my consent.

"I want to make love with you as we change," she said.

"You're crazy," I said. She tossed her head back and laughed. She undid my pants.

"I'd rather not be naked in front of all these people," I said. My mouth was working; the rest of my body didn't seem to belong to me anymore.

"Nonsense. We have no modesty here," she said. She stretched out on the rock, beckoning towards me. "Besides, as soon as our first litter is born, you will have your pick of all the other women as well."

"I'm not littering with you," I said. I heard a few peals of laughter. Adele's face flushed. Again she muttered something and my body was pulled. I stretched out beside her.

I hadn't realized it had gotten so late in the day. As I began to have sex with her a second time, the sun started to sink. The transformation to wolf that had before taken almost two days, began to happen rapidly.

"Yes, it is golden," she purred as she ran her hand through the hair thickening at my neck.

At the same moment she said that, I could see her face transforming. Our bodies no longer fit the way humans should. She parted from me for a second before turning around. I knew what to do; instinct and lack of free choice had forced me into a life of seeming stud service. She let out a sound between a moan and a howl as we joined back together.

The first thing that transformed this time for me was my legs; it was a bottom up transformation. A tear fell from my eye.

"NICK!"

It was so random. It was so sudden. The sound of my name and the familiar voice scared the crap out of me. I lifted my head and stared in disbelief through the fading sunlight.

"CATCH!"

Something long and sharp flew towards me. The other wolves had finally spotted the shadowy figure up in the tree and they went on the attack. I grabbed what he had tossed my way.

It was an arrow. My breath caught in my throat. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Brian monkey-scrambling up the tree. "DO IT!" he yelled.

The words came back to me just as if I was still reading them on the computer. Others believe that if the male Golden Wolf can kill Adele, recent victims can be returned to pure human form while older victims may finally find peace in death.

I clutched the arrow in my hand; Adele was still bucking underneath me in the throws of sex-dom. I lifted the arrow above my head. I didn't hesitate; I brought the sharp point down straight threw her chest, aimed perfectly for the heart that beat under the thick fur.

It was an incredible thing. Her body fell from mine. I backed off, feeling once again my own person. She writhed on the rock, half-human, half-wolf. Her eyes were already yellowed. She reached out to me.

"YOU DEMON!" she screamed. All around me I could hear other screams of agony.

I don't know what I was expecting. Maybe something like the Witch melting in The Wizard of Oz? Instead, what happened was an almost instantaneous disintegration into dust. I looked down at my body. No fur.

"Ashes to ashes," a voice said close to my ear. I jumped. Brian had gotten down from the tree. He was holding Cam in his arms. I looked around.

The amount of ash was incredible. About twenty others were still alive. Some had aged considerably, while others still looked roughly the same. Most of them were crying or praying.

"You know, next time you become a wolf, you might want to just tell me instead of making me have to look this stuff up," Bri said accusingly. I stared at him.

"How did you--"

"I didn't suspect anything until they found...they found Howie," Bri said quietly. He paused. "Wait, I take that back. I started to wonder when I had to shave you. Which was disgusting by the way. And watching you have sex just then? You so owe me. "

I ran a hand down my face. "Bri, I can't even--"

"Once I put the pieces together, I realized you must have run off in guilt. Lauren and D...it was too much of a coincidence. By the way, no one even suspected you. They think that there's some crazy Backstreet-related serial killer on the loose. When you disappeared, everyone just assumed you were the next victim."

"Are you kidding me?" I asked. Bri shook his head. We both looked down at Cam.

"I can't go back," I said.

"Of course you can," Bri argued. "Well, you can once you put your clothes back on."

"But Leigh...James..."

"She's worried about you. Everyone's worried about you. We're all family. Besides, I know deep in my heart that you would never have killed D if you hadn't changed. I looked at the calendar. It was a full moon that night.."

Another tear fell, but I didn't care. Bri had pretty much seen it all. I took Cam and we picked through the ash piles, our feet pointing in the direction of the road. "When have I ever been normal?" I finally asked, smiling weakly.

Bri grinned and slapped me on the back.

"Good point, buddy. Good point."

Epilogue

-- One Year Later --

"Nick, can you take out the trash?"

"Yeah, hold on!"

I clicked off the TV and headed into the kitchen. Cam was sitting in a high chair, his face covered with mashed carrots. James was eatinhg a cookie. Leigh pointed to the trash.

"It's full and I have a mess to clean up," she said with a smile.

"He hasn't gotten the eating thing down," I said with a laugh. I yanked the bag out of the trashcan. Leigh playfully tugged my shirt.

"Neither has his dad," she teased. She pulled me towards her and kissed me softly.

"Yes, but there's so many other things I can do well," I teased. She blushed and slapped the back of my jeans.

"Trash," she said.

I know what you're probably thinking...how in the hell did I end up with Howie's wife? Well, when Bri and I got back from Germany, everyone was so relieved to know we weren't dead that any questions were long forgotten. Bri had this elaborate story about how we had 'hid' out for a few days, but then we felt like chickens so we decided to come home. And miracuously, the murders stopped.

The first thing I wanted to do once things settled down was tell Leigh the truth about Howie's death. Bri had fought with me every step of the way, but he lost the battle.

Of course, Leigh hadn't believed me. She told me that wolves only exist in movies. And in a weird twist, she found it touching that I would even claim to be responsible.

We started spending a lot of time together. For me, in the beginning it was because I really did feel guilty that I had left her a single mom. And for her, I think it was because she was worried about a lack of 'womanly' care for Camden. Anyhow, I prayed every night that Howie wouldn't come down from Heaven and kill me. I wasn't really a bad person. And surprisingly I was a good dad. I just had to believe that Howie would have wanted me to step up. I had to believe he forgave me for tearing off his arm.

Because of the guilt and weirdness of being attracted to the widow of one of my best friends, Leigh and I didn't move in together right away. But about nine months after Howie's death, I found myself staying with her more and more. I started out in the guest bedroom, but no one told me how persuasive lovely Italian women are. Again, I tried to tell her I was responsible for Howie's death, but she dismissed it and told me I shouldn't feel guilty for sleeping with her.

And, well...

Now we were newlyweds and I was taking out the trash. We got married on a whim at city hall a week ago. It was great because only Brian and AJ knew; the press hadn't even figured out Leigh and I were together.

I'd be lying if I said I never thought about Lauren. After all, she was the first woman who truly taught me how to love. The older Cam got, the more he looked like her. It was so funny to watch him laugh and see her smile.

Leigh tells me that she feels the same way about James. She hasn't had the heart to cut his hair in forever and he's beginning to look a little like D sans-Millennium era.

As I opened the back door and carted the trash out, I looked up at the sky. There was a full moon tonight. It had taken me months to stop fearing this time of the month. It had felt so strange the first time to be able to get through the whole night without hair or extra bone growth. Leigh had found me cowering at home with Cam looked in his room. She had stayed with me the entire night.

And I loved her for that.

"DADA!" Cam exclaimed happily as I walked back in. I sat down and began to wipe his face off. Leigh ran a hand across my back as she took her seat by James. She played with his little ponytail and watched me.

"We're missing something, you know," she mused. I held out a piece of carrot and Cam took it from my fingers, smacking his lips. I laughed. "What?"

Leigh made a soft humming noise that totally relaxed me.

"A little girl."

I turned in surprise. "A what?"

Her eyes sparkled. "A little girl."

I grinned. I had a feeling this full moon was going to be a little wilder than most.

"Are you serious?" I asked. She nodded.

"And what if it's another boy?" I teased. She leaned down and kissed James forehead. "Can I go play?" he asked. She nodded. He wiggled off the chair and took off, still munching on his cookie.

"I'll take that gamble," she said. "Who knows, maybe we'll have a whole pack before we get a girl." She tilted her head a little and howled.

I must have paled because she leaned over and slapped my shoulder. "It's a joke, wolf boy! Really Nicky, you're wild but you're definitely not a wolf. I'm pretty sure you wax your chest."

"What?! I don't wax my chest!"

"But it's so smooth," she murmured. The murmur was what got me. I began to wipe Cam's face a little quicker. She stood up and bumped her hip against me.

"I'm going to go take a showerrrrr," she trilled. "Can you get the kids to bed?"

"You just gave James a cookie!" I protested. She giggled.

"Good luck!" she called. I heard her footsteps on the stairs.

I sighed and looked at Cam. He smiled up at me and grabbed the end of the towel. He began to gnaw on it.

"I guess you and Bri are the only ones who know my secret," I whispered. I kissed his forehead. "As for mommy Leigh, well..."

I glanced up at the stairs.

"I'm still hungry like a wolf."