Chapter 1
December 21st, 2005

Win couldn’t wait to be back on tour with the rest of her family. She missed AJ, Latecia, Gina, Daemon, Dennis, just everyone. She missed just being around everyone she loved. She’d spent the last month before tour with Denise, after… she didn’t want to think about what merited the after.
Denise was more than happy to have Win stay with her. AJ had asked Win to stay with him but she quickly declined saying that Denise deserved some of her quality time.
After Thanksgiving something happened. Win had been staying with Nick at his parents’ house for the holidays. Three days after Thanksgiving, Win called Denise and asked if she’d like some company for a while. After Thanksgiving AJ had gone back to Florida. No one knew what happened, and Win would not talk about it. Nick was not saying anything either, and as far as anyone knew, they were not speaking to one another.
Win did not act like anything was wrong. In fact she acted as though her life could not have been better. In many ways it couldn’t have been better. As an early Christmas gift, the guys and the wives had started a foundation in Winifred’s name and handed Win the keys to the foundation headquarters. They solicited to a number of celebrities, had a giant gala and collected over ten million in funds to be used to help abandoned children and homeless young adults.
Win was busier than ever taking phone calls, turning down offers from numerous different people about roles in almost every entertainment industry. Now she was focusing on getting a staff together so they could get the foundation up and running.

Win was busy running back and forth from her room to the living room trying to gather all her things. She had her phone pressed to one ear while she talked rapidly to the person on the other end of the line.
“Hello? Hi, yes, yes, we’re starting the scholarship program first. Uh huh, yeah, I started work on the applications a week ago. No, they’re not finished. Yeah, we’re starting in Pennsylvania only, no no, just former foster kids, homeless young adults, that kind of thing. Um hum, no, no, we will be expanding, it’s just that I got this not even a month ago, I want to start somewhere, otherwise we’ll spend all the time planning. Yeah, basic requirements, they must have a part time job, keep their grades up, follow school rules, no drugs or alcohol, and attendance, mandatory unless they are sick and then they need a doctors note. Um, just give the application to anyone who wants it, we’ll have to sort through them anyway. Okay, yeah, yeah.”
She had to hurry, AJ would be arriving in less than an hour and she still had to get to the airport and get checked in.
Everyone was taking separate flights to Europe. Win had been fine with this, but AJ said that there was no reason for her to fly alone when he could fly into Maryland and catch a connecting flight with Win to their destination.
Win found it futile to argue with him and really it wasn’t even an issue to really argue about. Besides, it would be nice getting to see him and Latecia again, and it was a really long flight, this way she wouldn’t be lonely.
With her bag packed, Denise rushed Win to the airport with just enough time to get through the metal detector lines. Win was rushing to the gate with her carryon in one hand and Jack’s cage jangling in her other hand. AJ was waiting at the end of the terminal with Latecia in arms.
“It’s about time you got here! We’re gonna miss the flight!” AJ said laughing as Win doubled over to catch her breath.
“Latecia, baby, come see your grandma!” Denise said taking Latecia from AJ’s arms for a second.
“We only have a minute mom, what, don’t I get a hug!” AJ said indignantly.
“I know, I know, hey boy,” Win said standing up and throwing her arms around AJ, carryon, rat cage and all.
“You lost a little weight, what happened mom, I thought you were supposed to keep her fattened up!” AJ laughed squeezing Win tightly in his arms.
“You did too, Latecia must have kept you on your toes,” Win said letting go.
“She did, didn’t you baby?” AJ asked taking Latecia back from Denise.
“Winnie! I missed you so much!” Latecia said lunging from her father’s arms to hug Win around the neck.
“Me too little miss Leti,” Win said, surprised when Latecia flung her arms around her neck.
“Winnie, you have to come live with daddy again, he’s so sad without you there!” Latecia exclaimed when she let go. AJ turned a slight shade of red and said,
“Latecia, now you know that’s a secret!”
“You two better get going, it’s last call,” Denise said giving Latecia a kiss.
“Yeah, now remember mom, you are coming to meet us in Barcelona in March,” AJ said setting Latecia down to give his mother a hug.
“Yes I remember, you need to stop worrying about me Alex,” Denise said giving him a squeeze.
“I’m sorry, I can’t. Oh, and the offer is still on the table, I mean it, you can go and live in my house while I’m gone, I’m sure Edith would love for you to be there, especially since she’s letting Latecia stay with us till September.” AJ said giving his mother a whiskery kiss.
“Daddy, can we go now?” Latecia asked shaking his pant leg.
“In a minute sweetie, come here for a second,” Win said kneeling down and calling Latecia over to look in Jack’s cage. AJ looked down at his daughter and smiled.
“Alexander, I am going to be fine by myself, but I will go visit Edith, don’t you worry, now go, if you miss your flight,” Denise started,
“We’ll just get another ticket and go on the next one, or I’ll rent a helicopter to take us, mom, don’t worry about it, but remember, you need anything, at all, you call me, okay? Are you sure you don’t want to come with us for Christmas ma?” AJ asked again.
“Yes, yes, Alex, okay, I will, and no, I already have plans for Christmas, you be with your friends and your new little family, now go!” The stewardess was getting ready to close the door.
“All right! Bye mom, I love you!” AJ said scooping up Latecia and running toward the door.
“Thanks for everything Denise, really, you’ve been the best.” Win said giving Denise a hug.
“You are very welcome, I’ll see you in March!” Win smiled and dashed in AJ’s trail to the stewardess waiting to close the door.

“Oh I’m so glad we’re on our way back to the tour,” Win sighed as she sat down opposite AJ and Latecia.
“Really?” AJ asked sarcastically.
“Yes really! I missed everyone,” Win replied smiling.
“Winnie, you want to color with me!” Latecia asked pulling out her crayons and coloring book.
“Sure, you come sit over on this side with me, we’ll just let Jack sit next to your daddy,” Win said wiggling her eyebrows at AJ. As Latecia buckled Jack’s cage into the seat next to AJ, Win laughed when she saw the recoiling look on his face.

After about two hours of coloring, Barbie dolls and storybooks, Latecia was tired. She fell asleep in the seat beside Win, curling up with an airplane pillow and blanket.
“Why don’t you come over and sit with me, let her sleep,” AJ said.
“All right, hang on a second, hand me Jack,” Win replied. Win and Jack traded seats so that she and AJ were next to one another.
“So what’s the story?” AJ asked.
“What story?” Win replied confused.
“What happened? Why did you go stay with my mom after Thanksgiving?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Win, please, my mom was really worried about you, I’m worried about you.”
“AJ, if I wanted to talk about it, I’d say, AJ, I want to talk about it.”
“You just said it, now spill,” AJ replied.
“AJ,” Win growled, but he pulled down his sunglasses, lifted an eyebrow and replied,
“Now I care about you a lot, but call it being a man, I can’t figure everything out on my own, now tell me what happened.” Win sat back and looked at him. She thought back to the events of last month. A giant pang hit her in the region of her throat. It felt constricted.
“Why don’t you ask Taylor.” Win replied looking away.
“What about Taylor?” AJ asked confused.
“What just happened to Taylor?” Win asked exasperated.
“He quit the tour, he took a job in his home town, what does that have to do with anything?”
“What else happened?” Win asked.
“He and Jen split up, so what does that have to do with you?” AJ asked, still not getting it. Win huffed.
“God you are a man. Fine, I’ll tell you. Taylor found out Jen was cheating on him.” Win replied.
“I still don’t get what that has to do with you, other than the fact that you and Jen are friends,” AJ replied.
“Just think about it for a minute, okay?” Win replied looking at him with an exhausted stare.
AJ sat back and thought for a minute. What could Jen, cheating on Taylor have to do with Win? Win and Jen were friends. They’d met on tour, she shared a room with Jen. She was also a friend with Taylor. It was a big shock to everyone when they found out Taylor was leaving, the guys had known him for years, and he had been on the Millennium and Black and Blue tours. No one could believe that Jen would do that to Taylor. But other than that, the details were non-existent in the eyes of everyone besides Jen and Taylor. No one even knew what Jen had actually done besides “cheat.”
He thought back to the conversation he’d had with Nick right after Win had left California. Yes of course something was wrong and no he didn’t want to talk about it. He had his hands full enough trying to take care of Jen. She was so upset after Taylor yelled at her in front of everyone.
“Nick and Jen!” AJ hissed harshly, ripping off his sunglasses.
“Took you long enough,” Win replied with pursed lips.
“How did you, when did you?” AJ asked bewildered.
“The night before Thanksgiving, Jen and Taylor showed up for dinner, they’re both friends of the family, so of course everyone was there. Well they stayed overnight, I was staying in one of the guestrooms, Nick had his old room, his parents have that old fashioned rule. Anyways, the next day, I woke up first, and went to get Nick up, you know, cause he wanted me to watch the parade on TV with him. I knocked on his door, but he didn’t answer,” at this Win felt her windpipe constricting again.
“Winnie, what happened sweetie?” AJ asked taking her hand in his and squeezing it tight.
“He and Jen were wrapped up in each other, sleeping soundly. He had a smile on his face. The bastard had a god damn smile on his face,” Win said gritting her teeth.
“Honey I’m sorry,” AJ replied.
“No, no, it’s not that. I was the stupid one. Everything I went through, all the stupid teenage bull shit! Just that crap, the shit that I did to you, just to be with him, dammit I was so stupid.” Win said hitting the armrest. She couldn’t look at AJ.
“Hey, don’t beat yourself up. We all did things we regret. But Win, you just tried to be happy, you can’t blame yourself for that,” AJ said trying to look at her.
“We just made such a big deal out of being together. Made you so angry that you did something you would never have done,” Win replied.
“I was the one who decided to try and hit Nick, that had nothing to do with you, or even him. I decided to hit him.” AJ said grabbing her chin and making her look at him.
“I know we weren’t ‘together’ all that long, but we were friends, I thought I knew him better than that.” Win replied, refusing to cry.
“Did you talk to him about it?” AJ asked.
“No. I stuck around long enough to see the fight between Jen and Taylor in front of the laid out turkey dinner. I grabbed a hotel room. Spent the entire day in bed then called your mother. That’s all that happened.” Win replied looking up at AJ, his eyes sincerely sorry for everything that had happened to her. His hand still rested on her chin.
“I’m sorry he did that to you Win, I really am.”
“So am I,” Win said casting her eyes away. AJ let go of her chin and looked away also.
“Win, do you ever think about, about where we might be if I hadn’t screwed up?” AJ asked fumbling with his sunglasses in his lap.
“Every day,” Win replied immediately. He looked up at her quickly. She leaned back against the headrest of the seat and smiled at him.
“Why the hell did you shave your hair off?” she asked.
“What?” he laughed.
“Your hair, you got the convict looking thing happening,” she replied rubbing her hand over his peach fuzz haircut. She went to pull her hand away when he said,
“Don’t stop.” She slid her hand down the back of his head to his neck.
“What do you want me to do?” she asked looking into his eyes.
“What do you want to do?” He asked concentrating on the feeling of her hand brushing against his skin again. So many memories flooded back to him in that touch. The day they met, dancing with her at the party, laying with her in the bunk, their first kiss, the first time they made love. He felt his inner core heating and melting at the same time. “Don’t stop touching me,” he thought desperately. “If she stops touching me I’ll die.”
“I want to keep touching you, just like this,” she replied, her fingers brushing up along his neck again, twirling around his ear, crawling across his forehead. He closed his eyes, bowed his head and she continued to touch his face. He felt her other hand reaching up and caress his head as well. He didn’t want to wake up from this dream.
It was as if an explosion took place inside of him when he felt her lips touch the top of his head. He felt a tear sear the inside of his eyelid. She still loved him. That meant everything to him in the world. If he died now, it wouldn’t matter, Win loved him.
She kissed him until he lifted his head and looked at her. Her hands clutched his head as she looked him directly in the eyes. She smiled at him.
“See, I told you daddy! Now you’re happy!” Latecia squealed sitting up. Win turned her head and looked at Latecia, still touching AJ.
“Yes, baby, I am,” AJ replied smiling at her.
“Are you Daddy’s girlfriend again?” Latecia asked grinning. Win looked back at AJ and smiled.

Chapter 2
December 21st 2005

During the second half of the flight Win fell asleep. Her head fell down onto AJ’s shoulder and he smiled to himself thinking about what had happened in the last few hours. Win had touched him again, Win had kissed again. He felt as if he’d swallowed a balloon and his chest puffed out proudly in the thought that was loved by Win. This time he would not screw up. This time he would be the perfect man, and make her know that she did not make a mistake in giving him another chance.
Latecia sat across from AJ, busy talking quietly to Jack the rat. AJ smiled at the two beautiful ladies he had in his life. Latecia, his daughter, the perfect flower of his eye. Win, the love of his life, the woman he wanted to marry. He couldn’t have loved anyone more than he loved these two people right here.

They arrived in France near nine o’clock at night. Everyone was exhausted although they had taken nap at some time during the flight. AJ carried Latecia out of the plane draped over his shoulder, fast asleep.
“She’s quite the little beauty,” Win said as she looked at the sleeping Latecia on the drive to the hotel.
“Yeah, she’s beautiful,” AJ remarked smiling.
“She has your eyes, your nose definitely,” Win said pinching his nose, “and that giant smile.”
“Which one?” he asked grinning.
“That one, right there!” Win said pointing at him and laughing.
“You love that smile, though,” he replied smiling again. She cupped his face in her hand.
“I love more than that.”
“Daddy, are we at the hotel yet?” Latecia asked picking her head up.
“Yes sweetie, we are,” AJ replied placing a kiss on her forehead.
“Good, cause I’m tired,” Latecia said putting her head back on his shoulder.
A few minutes later they pulled up at the hotel and went inside. While checking in, AJ asked if he could get the room adjoining his for Win. She smiled at him when he asked the question and took the key from the desk clerk.
“Why don’t I get Latecia to bed and you come over and talk for a while after you get settled?” AJ asked when they got to their rooms.
“Okay, sure, we could order something to eat, I’m starving,” Win replied unlocking her door.
“Great, I’ll see you in a few minutes.” AJ said, his eyes lighting up.
Latecia snuggled gratefully into her bed with her stuffed dolphin. AJ grinned to himself as he stopped at the door and looked back at his daughter. Sighing to himself he closed the door and went back out to the parlor.
He spent a few minutes looking over the room service menu before deciding on what to order. He placed the order with the kitchen and as soon as he hung up the phone there was a knock at the door. His hands started to shake.
Nervously he went to the door and grabbed the handle. It turned slowly in his hand as if eternity were between his fingers. On the other side of the oak door were the eyes he drank in every time he looked at her face. Win greeted him with a genuine smile and walked in.
“Latecia go to bed all right?” Win asked watching him close the door.
“Oh yeah, she was exhausted.” AJ replied shaking slightly.
“What’s the matter?” Win asked cocking her head to one side.
“It’s just that this is the first time we’ve been alone together since, well you know since when, but I’m just so glad to see you,” he said looking up from his hands. He walked to the middle of the room, looking around but really just looking for an excuse to stall. He didn’t know what to say.
“I’m happy to see you too.” She replied walking towards him. He felt scared, he didn’t know what was going to happen.
“I ordered room service, hot roast beef sandwiches with cheese, it was the closest thing to Philly Cheesestake they had, oh, and a side of fried eggplant.” AJ replied awkwardly.
“You remembered,” Win laughed.
“I can’t forget anything about you,” AJ whispered, almost not hearing the words come out of his mouth himself. He looked up at her; she was smiling at him, standing only a few feet away from him and waiting.
But he couldn’t get up the nerve to make the first move. The moment was so intense he jumped when there was a knock at the door.
“I better get that,” he said reaching into his pocket as he walked to the door.
“Room service,” the bellhop said as the door opened.
“Looks great, just put it over there.” AJ said holding open the door. The bellhop rolled the cart in where directed and went back to the door. AJ handed him a tip and the bellhop thanked him.
“Thank you sir, very much, and I know this is very rude, at this time of night, but could I get an autograph for my sister, she’s a very big fan of yours.” AJ laughed slightly.
“No, it’s not rude, I’ll start worrying when no one asks for my autograph. Hang on, let me get something,” AJ said and hurried over to his bag. He pulled out a T-shirt he’d worn on a couple different interviews.
“What’s your sister’s name?” AJ asked.
“Amber,” the bellhop replied smiling.
“All right, to Amber, one beautiful fan, yours forever, Alexander, AJ McLean. How’s that?” he asked holding the shirt out to the bellhop.
“She’ll love it, thank you so much Mr. McLean.” The bellhop replied grinning.
“No problem, and it’s AJ,” AJ replied holding out a hand to the bell hop and shaking it vigorously.
“Say, what are you and your sister doing this Saturday?” AJ asked.
“Nothing, why?”
“Bring her down here, say around eleven, we’ll be eating in the dining room. Bring her down, I’ll introduce her to all the guys and the crew. I think we can even muster up a few tickets for her and her friends for the show that night.” AJ replied.
“You’re serious?” he asked with wide eyes.
“Sure!” AJ said hitting his arm in a friendly fashion.
“This is great, I’ll make it a surprise, she’ll just die, thanks a lot sir, have a good night!” The bellhop said before walking away. AJ laughed again and closed the door.
“Now that was really sweet of you,” Win said smiling.
“Hey, what can I say, he caught me at a good moment, people can get anything they want out of me when I’m tired,” AJ replied with a shrug of his shoulders, “Let’s eat, I’m hungry.” AJ walked over to the cart, Win followed.
“They can get anything out of you when you’re tired?” Win asked.
“Yeah,” AJ replied looking over at her.
“Then there is something that I want,” Win said giving him a piercing look. He didn’t have time to respond as she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tight to her body. He closed his eyes and felt the emotion wash over him in one big warm wave. It felt so good to have her do that again. Tears burned in his eyes again and he couldn’t fight them. He felt the first sob come and didn’t make any effort to stop it.
“AJ, you don’t have to cry,” Win said softly clinging to him tighter. He couldn’t stop once he’d started and soon he couldn’t hold on to her, it was too much.
“Damn girl,” he said walking away and laughing as he wiped his tears away roughly, “you see what you do to me.”
“What did I do to you?” Win asked sympathetically, following him to the couch and sitting beside him.
“I’m waiting to wake up from this dream,” he said, still wiping his eyes. She put a hand on his knee and smiled.
“You are awake, it’s not a dream,” she replied squeezing his knee.
“You swear to god it’s not a dream?” he asked looking directly in her eyes.
“I swear. AJ, I’ve been thinking about a lot of things since everything happened. I tried to make a case to stay away from you. I tried to make myself believe that I could never care about you again after what you did. But it didn’t work.” Win said moving closer to him.
“But what about Nick?” AJ replied.
“We were friends, friendship can be confused with love sometimes. But a love like this, between you and me, can’t die over one thing.”
“Love?” AJ asked breathlessly.
“Yes, AJ,” Win replied warmly.
“You love me?” he asked.
“I never stopped. And that’s why it hurt so much, I tried to deny something that never waned into nothingness.” Win replied.
“So, we could, I could, Win,” AJ stammered.
“I want us to be together.” Win replied taking his hand.
“You do?”
“Yes, I do. I know that if you could you’d take back what you did, and I know that if I could I’d forget that anything happened I would.” Win replied caressing his face.
“Then you, you think, we could try being together again?” AJ asked, not daring to breathe.
“Yes, AJ, more than anything,” Win replied. He closed his eyes again and sighed deeply. The words he’d wanted to hear for so long, finally they were happening.
“AJ, AJ, are you okay?” Win asked putting her other hand his side.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” AJ said opening his eyes and trying not to cry again.
“AJ, please tell me what’s wrong,” Win asked.
“You don’t know how much I’ve wanted to here those words, I’ve just missed you so much, and I love you so much.” AJ said breaking down again.
“Come here, come here,” Win said pulling his body towards her.
“You do realize that you are the only one who can make me cry like a baby,” he said laughing. Win laughed as well.
“Come on, let’s eat something,” Win said standing up and pulling him to his feet. She wiped away some of his tears. He took hold of her waist and stared at her. She knew what he was thinking. Simultaneously their faces came together and their lips met. AJ felt his knees buckling.
“AJ, lets go to bed,” Win said after a few minutes.
“Uh huh, okay,” AJ mumbled as she pulled him by the hand towards the bedroom.
Win sat on the edge of the bed and pulled AJ down on the bed with her, guiding him because he was still nervous and shaking. She lifted his shirt off over his head and ran her hands along his arms and whispered,
“AJ, make love to me.”
“Okay,” AJ replied leaning down to kiss her again. She felt his nervousness, his body shaking, the tension in his muscles. She moved her hands as to cover as much of his skin as possible. Slowly the tension in his muscles began to subside. His lips trailed along her cheek, down her neck. He nibbled on her ear whispering,
“I love you.”

Chapter 3
December 21st, 2005

AJ looked down at Win as he ran his fingers through her hair, marveling at what they had just done. Her head lay on his chest, her hand lay on his stomach.
“I’ve never felt like that with anyone else,” Win said stroking the light hairs above AJ’s belly button.
“Like what?” AJ asked.
“Loved while you were making love to me,” Win replied sighing.
“I feel that way too.” AJ replied.
“I’m hungry, what about you?” Win asked.
“Now that’s one thing that never changes, sex always builds up an appetite,” AJ replied laughing.
“An appetite for what?” Win asked.
“More sex,” they both laughed.
“Come on, roast beef is just as good cold,” Win said patting his stomach and sitting up. They slipped into their clothes and grabbed their food so they could eat in bed. They sat across from each other eating and talking and laughing.
“So are you going to stay with me?” he asked looking at her.
“If you want me to,” Win replied.
“If I want you to? What do you think?” AJ asked shaking his head. Win laughed. He leaned forward to give her a small kiss.
“I’ve missed this,” Win replied smiling.
“Me too.” AJ was quiet for a moment chewing.
“Win, what are we going to tell everyone?” AJ asked.
“The truth,” Win replied with a mouth full of roast beef.
“Really, I mean what if they,”
“AJ, nothing comes out of lying. Yeah it was a fiasco, but if we try to make up something, it’ll always look worse later. We’ll just say that we are together again, that’s all,” Win replied.
“Good, but it’s still going to be awkward, no matter what we do.” AJ replied.
“Of course it is, but I don’t care. I love you AJ, just remember that,” Win replied looking at him with the seriousness of her statement in her eyes.
“Let’s not worry about it until tomorrow, okay?” AJ asked.
“All right, it’s late, we should get some sleep.” Win said getting up and returning the dishes to the cart. She turned back to look at AJ and found him watching her.
“Now lets see, where am I going to sleep, hum,” Win said putting a finger on her chin.
“Get your ass, back in this bed, right now,” AJ said playfully.
“If you say so,” Win replied, sprinting toward the bed she jumped up and landed beside him. They kidded around for a few minutes, rolling around and laughing at one another.
“Come on AJ, you know we both have to get up in the morning,” Win said finally.
“Oh all right, hit the light on your side,” Win leaned to the left side of the bed and switched the lamp off, cloaking the room in darkness once again. They snuggled down into the sheets, AJ wrapping his arms around Win and flinging his leg over her hip as usual. This always made her laugh.
“What?” he asked.
“I missed that too,” she replied patting his leg.
“I knew you did.”
“Yeah, good night baby boy, I love you,” Win replied.
“Good night beautiful, and this time I’m not going to let you go.” AJ said holding tight to Win, smiling as he drifted off to sleep.

Chapter 4
December 22nd, 2005

The next morning AJ woke up and thinking back to the events of last night, he didn’t want to open his eyes and find it a dream. It was a good possibility that it was a dream. Many times he had dreamt that he and Win had gotten back together, everything was fine between them again and then woke up to find Latecia’s stuffed dolphin in his face and Latecia sitting happily beside him on the bed waiting for him to wake up.
Taking a moment to indulge in his thoughts of Win one more time, he snapped his eyes open and saw a mass of dark hair in front of his face. He felt his hands around Win’s warm body, he hadn’t dreamed. It was all real. He breathed a deep sigh of relief and smiled at the thought that he had the love of his world back in his life.
“Daddy, daddy, are you going to wake up now? Daddy, come on, daddy,” a familiar little voice said from behind his back.
“Daddy is still asleep Latecia,” AJ replied smiling.
“No he’s not! Daddy!” Latecia squealed, jumping up on foot of the bed.
“I take it, we have a visitor,” Win said without moving.
“Yes, we do,” AJ said laughing as Latecia started jumping up and down on the bed.
“Daddy and Winnie are boyfriend and girlfriend again! Yeah, see, now daddy’s happy! And when daddy’s happy, daddy smiles.” Latecia sang to her own little tune. Win and AJ slowly untangled themselves from each other and sat up.
“Good morning Latecia,” Win said smiling. Latecia just keep bouncing until she jumped and flung herself into AJ’s lap.
“Morning Winniefredie! Morning daddy,” Latecia sang happily.
“How is my little liver?” AJ asked kissing her on the top of the head when he could catch her.
“I’m so glad you and Winnie are in love again daddy!” Latecia shouted with glee.
“Me too, are you hungry?” AJ asked tickling her.
“Ha ha, yes, daddy! I’m very hungry!” Latecia laughed.
“What do you say Win, should we head down to the welcome back breakfast?” AJ asked turning to Win.
“Of course I do, I can’t wait to see everyone!” Win said happily.
“Everyone?” AJ asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Almost everyone,” Win remembered wrinkling her nose, “but no worries, lets go, right Latecia?” Win asked plucking Latecia out of AJ’s lap and giving her a big hug.
“Yeah, I want to see the baby!” Latecia giggled.
“So do I, why don’t you go get dressed okay?” Win said. Latecia nodded rapidly and took off to her bedroom.
“What a little rocket,” Win remarked smiling.
“Yeah, she is, come on, lets get this over with,” AJ said hauling himself out of bed.
“Get what over with?” Win asked.
“Everyone figuring out what actually happened,” AJ replied.
“It shouldn’t be that bad, Nick should have said something to at least a few people by now,” Win replied.
“He didn’t, cause I would have heard it from Howie, he tells me everything, even things he’s been sworn to secrecy on. Well, only things he knows he won’t get in trouble for telling me,” AJ replied.
“You know what, I don’t care. Because you know what, the only thing that matters, is that I love you, and we’re gonna be together. Let ‘em talk all they want, it doesn’t matter, okay?” Win said walking around the bed and looking directly in his eyes.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
“Of course I am,” Win replied kissing him on the cheek, “wait for me, I’m just gonna get changed.” Win replied patting his chest.
“Okay, we’ll wait for you,” AJ said watching her walk out the bedroom. He wished he didn’t feel as worried as he did about sharing the truth with his friends. He knew what the reactions would be.
“Right after she bounced off of Nick?”
“It’s a little fast isn’t it?”
“Are you sure she’s not trying to get back at him?” He could hear their questions already. But he didn’t care. She loved him and they were back together.

Chapter 5
December 22nd, 2005

A few minutes later Win met him in the hall way with Latecia, ready to go to the welcome back breakfast.
“Don’t be so nervous,” Win whispered to him as they rode down in the elevator.
“I’m trying not to be,” he replied grabbing her hand in his.
When they got out of the elevator, AJ couldn’t help but feel nervous and excited all at the same time. A few feet away were the people he considered his brothers. The four other people he relied upon most for their support and opinions. They would be worried that she was playing him. Of course they all loved Win, but their support would still, and always be for him first, they had known him since he was fourteen. They’d spent over ten years living, traveling, eating, sleeping, playing and working together. They were closer to him they could ever imagine being with Win.
Win held his hand as they walked across the lobby to the dining room. Upon entering the room, a great cheer went up from the crowd gathered inside.
“AJ! Win! Welcome back!” Daemon roared running forward and throwing his arms around the both of them, clapping his large hands on their backs.
“Daemon, can’t, breathe!” Win laughed.
“I missed you guys!” he laughed letting them go.
“We missed you too Dae. Hey Latecia, say hello to Daemon,” AJ said picking up Latecia.
“Hey little lady, how are you?” Daemon asked with a grin.
“I got a secret!” Latecia said grinning.
“You want to tell me?” Daemon asked leaning in.
“Yeah, daddy and Winnie are in love again!” Latecia whispered loud enough for Win and AJ to hear.
“Oh really, can you two corroborate that story?” Daemon asked looking from Win to AJ with a superior smile.
“Yes, we can,” Win replied putting an arm around AJ’s waist.
“But I thought you and Nick were dating?” Daemon asked confused.
“We were, but he found himself with Jen, that’s why Taylor left the tour,” Win replied.
“And so you two are back together, even after everything that happened?” Daemon asked.
“Yeah, we are,” AJ replied, his throat feeling scratchy.
“Well that’s great, true love triumphs all! Really guys, I’m really glad, hang on,” Daemon said grinning. He turned around and yelled at the top of his lungs,
“Listen up everybody! Win and AJ just got here, and guess what, the Backstreet Boy’s tour, cutest couple, are back together!” Another cheer went up from the room with applause and whistles.
Soon they were flooded with people. Arms and hands tangled around one another as they were hugged and greeted from all angles. Eventually they were able to get away and were able to greet Brian, Brianna and baby Winnie.
“Hey, there’s our girl! How are you Win!” Brian exclaimed hugging Win tightly.
“Daddy, let me down please, I want to see the baby,” Latecia said squirming.
“It’s so good to see you again too Brian!” Win replied as he let her go and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. AJ let Latecia down to look at baby Winnie sleeping peacefully in her stroller.
“Hey man, long time no see,” Brian said giving AJ the handshake and a manly hug.
“Brianna, how are you!” Win squealed as they hugged.
“Just great! How are you?” Brianna asked as she held Win out to look at her.
“You look great honey, really,” Win remarked at Brianna’s figure.
“Well what about you, you certainly lost a bit of weight since the last time we saw you, you do know what you’re supposed to do at Thanksgiving, right?” Brianna asked.
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Win said rolling her eyes.
“So what the hell is up with this announcement, and why can’t you be bothered to come say hi to your big brother!” Kevin exclaimed as he and Tessa joined the group. Everyone exchanged hugs and greetings.
“Yeah, really, what is up with this!” Tessa said pointing to AJ’s hand around Win’s waist.
“Win and I, are officially back together,” AJ replied smiling.
“Really? That’s just great guys,” Tessa said smiling and giving Win’s hand a squeeze.
“Incredible, really,” Kevin said grinning from ear to ear. He was happy for AJ, he’d been so depressed without Win all this time. He had said he was happy for Win, but Kevin had known all along, that he would never really be happy about it.
The odd thing though was, what had happened between Nick and Win? No one knew what was going on with Jen and Taylor, and for that matter they had just as much information about Nick and Win. This would turn out to be an interesting holiday.
A little while later Howie joined the party, his flight from Spain just getting in that morning. His family was remaining in Barcelona for Christmas so he could fly back to spend the holidays with them. He had however invited his girlfriend Rene along with him.
Upon hearing the announcement about Win and AJ, he felt it necessary to find out what was going on. As far as he knew, Win and Nick had still been dating, so why the hell were she and AJ now back together? Especially after all the trouble the group had been through with the little love triangle. The fights, AJ cheating on her, breaking Win’s nose and knocking Nick around. Something had to be going on.

Chapter 6
December 22nd, 2005

“AJ, hey man, how’s it going!” Howie called once he spotted him across the room.
“D! Hey, get over here!” AJ replied enthusiastically. Howie came through the crowd smiling jovially and greeting his fellow bandmate with a hug.
“Great to see you man, how’s Rene?” AJ asked.
“Fabulous, she can’t wait to meet you guys. But what about you, what’s this about you and Win I hear?” Howie asked in a joking and happy manner, trying not to alarm AJ to his worries about what was going on.
“Back together,” AJ replied simply, grinning broadly.
“Really now?” Howie asked carefully.
“Yeah, I can’t believe it either,” AJ replied waving to Win across the room. She waved back, smiling and turned back to Brian and Brianna.
“Howie, hey man, what’s up?” Kevin asked smiling as he came over. Howie and Kevin hugged before Howie asked the next question that was burning in the back of his brain.
“Don’t you want to talk about this with us?” Howie asked quickly.
“What?” AJ asked confused.
“About you and Win,” Howie continued.
“Howie, come on, not now,” Kevin said, his lips stiffening.
“What, don’t you think we should talk about this?” Howie asked, looking up at Kevin.
“Later, not now, you didn’t even get off your flight until what, a half hour ago? Give it a rest, we’ll talk about it later,” Kevin replied. AJ looked back and forth from Howie to Kevin, each time the crease in his forehead deepening.
“Why is it that we, all us guys I’m assuming, need to talk about my relationship with Win?” he asked suddenly, surprising Howie slightly.
“It’s a little quick, don’t you think?” Howie asked.
“It’s not up to you to decide,” AJ retorted angrily before Kevin put his hand up between the two men.
“Not, now,” Kevin said slowly and steadily. Howie looked up at Kevin worried, seeing the look be returned, but shrugged.
“Okay, but later,” He replied turning to go say hi to Brian and Brianna.

Nick had been sitting in the car with Jen when he saw Howie and Rene pull up in front of the hotel and get out. He had been sitting there for twenty minutes already, trying to get the nerve to get out of the car.
“Nick, how long are we going to stay out here?” Jen asked quietly, gently patting his arm.
“I don’t want to go in there,” he said looking over at her. She knew the feeling. Win was her friend, had been Nick’s girlfriend, for a little while anyway. And the guys? Taylor was their best friend, how were they going to look at her now? Her gut twisted at the thought. She could only imagine how Nick felt.
“How do things get so complicated so fast?” he asked. He felt so bad for everything he had put Win through, especially finding out the way she did. He had made such a big deal about being with her. It even got AJ so mad that he had actually hit someone, and that someone had been Win. AJ had never hit anyone, not even one of the guys when they had gotten in a fight. This had to be the crowning moment of his anger. His best friend stealing his girlfriend. Now, after all that, he had cheated on Win with an engaged woman. A woman engaged to another of his best friends, Taylor. Taylor who had been so betrayed that he quit the tour and moved back home to work as a bodyguard for a local senator.
“Oh who knows. Look at it this way, maybe Win and AJ will get back together,” Jen said, hoping that it was true.
“I highly doubt that. She’s probably so angry with me that she might have left the tour.” Nick replied. He wasn’t trying to be arrogant, but he reasoned that she’d been burned three times, first by AJ, then by Nick and Jen. She might be wondering how long it’d be before the rest of them turned on her.
“No, she didn’t, I spoke to Daemon yesterday and he said that she was on her way with AJ. He insisted that he fly here with her. I bet you Nick, that she and AJ will be back together as soon as we go in there. I mean it, maybe this showed her how good she had it with AJ.” Jen said trying to comfort Nick.
“And how bad a friend I was to her. She won’t trust me anymore,” Nick replied sadly.
“That’s what happens with love sometimes though Kiddo,” Jen said smiling, gently fixing a piece of hair by his ear. She knew he loved when she called him that and touched him that way. He had to smile back at her.
“Are you worried that I’d do that to you?” he asked looking at her.
“What, sleep with Win or something? Nick, I know you, and we both have done things that we are ashamed of. I mean, you cheated on Win, I cheated on Taylor, so Kiddo, we’re even, we’re both in the same situation, you could do it to me as much as I could do it to you,” Jen said stroking his face lightly.
“And if you could?” he asked.
“I wouldn’t,” she said simply.
“I am glad I’m with you again,” he said smiling at her.
“It sure took us long enough Kiddo,” Jen laughed.
“All right, lets go face the music,” Nick replied squeezing her knee gently before opening the door.

Chapter 7
December 22nd 2005

AJ was the first to notice Nick and Jen come into the room. He had expected them to be there earlier, their flight arriving earlier than even Howie and Rene’s. Nick looked like hell. He had dark circles under his eyes, his hair was completely disheveled and he looked as though he’d lost a few pounds. That was strange in itself because all the guys, with the exception of Kevin, usually gained a couple pounds back while they were not on tour. Touring kept them all slim with the lack of sleep and the dancing at every concert. When off tour, no one practiced the dance moves and it was very easy for the weight to crawl back on.
Nick had always been the worst and he’d always been very sensitive about it. They would tour for six months, have a month off and he’d come back at least fifteen pounds heavier. Kevin never gained any weight, he was a slim eater, worked out constantly, and always practiced the dance moves while on vacation. Howie usually put on about five or six, Brian as well, because he was on a strict diet as it was because of his heart complications. AJ was in that range also, but on this break he had had Latecia. They’d spent the better part of their days at the beach, running and playing. Besides, no one could complain about his weight, when he had been using he had been thin as a rail.
Something had to be up. Nick was never that skinny.
AJ looked over to Win and realized she had seen Nick as well. He was worried about her right away. Nick had hurt her, not so much because he broken her heart, but she had thought they were better friends than that. She wished that he had just come and talked to her, she would have understood.
Nick was shaking as he looked around the room. He saw Win out of the corner of his eye and turned to look at her. She was staring directly at him, and the look he saw in her eyes was not welcoming. She turned away quickly, making a b-line for AJ. When she got to AJ, Nick noticed that AJ was looking at him too. Kevin was there as well, saying something that got Win and AJ to turn away from him and laugh. Jen squeezed his hand.
“Nicky! Hey my man, what is going on!” Brian called out loudly. Before Nick could move, Brian had gripped him in a tight bear hug.
“Brian, can’t breathe,” Nick fought to get out.
“Oh all right, I suppose you have to breathe, Jen, hi baby doll, how are you?” Brian asked giving Jen a gentler hug.
“Hi sweetie, I’m good, where’s Brianna and the adorable little baby girl of yours?” Jen asked smiling.
“Oh she was with Win a second ago,” Brian said, turning and looking around the room. He spotted Win standing with Kevin and AJ and said, “Well Win’s hanging with AJ and Kevin now, oh wait, there she is,” Brian said lighting up with a smile upon seeing his wife and daughter.
“Come on, she’s been wanting to talk to you,” Brian said taking Jen’s hand and pulling her across the room.
Nick felt Jen’s presence gone from his side like it were one of his legs he needed to stand on. He needed her. How was he going to get through this with out her? When the story came out about what really happened the guys were bound to be disappointed in him, AJ was going to kill him, and the rest of the crew were going to crucify him for making them lose Taylor. He was most worried about the second thing though. Nick was sure as soon as AJ found out he had hurt Win, AJ would lunge at him, and this time he wouldn’t miss.
Taking a deep breath he walked forward through the crowd, directly to AJ, Kevin and Win. Win caught sight of him walking towards them and quickly turned away to talk to Gina. Nick had expected that. He knew that she would not want to talk to him.
“Nick, hey, good to see you,” Nick nearly jumped out of his skin when he realized AJ was talking to him.
“Hey, AJ,” he said uncertainly, worried that any minute AJ would reach out to strangle him. Of course the rest of the guys didn’t know anything, he hadn’t said anything, and Win hadn’t said anything, but Win surely wouldn’t have avoided saying something to AJ. He had to know.
AJ did the group’s handshake and smiled at him and Kevin gave him a hug. He was surprised at the affection he was getting from the both of them.
“Nick!” Nick knew that voice, it was Daemon, hard to miss. He turned just in time for the large man to pick him up in a giant hug, nearly breaking his ribs.
“I think we need to get him a girlfriend or something, he enjoys that too much,” Kevin said laughing.
“I just missed you guys!” Daemon roared, throwing his arms around all three of them and squeezing them to his sides. They were all taken by surprised but just laughed and rubbed their necks where Daemon had grabbed them.
“Gina! Hey there you are!” Daemon yelled before taking off again.
“No wonder he and Latecia get along,” AJ said looking over at Latecia as Win scooped her up in her arms. Win smiled wide and showered Latecia with kisses. He listened as Win spoke to her.
“Now what were you doing all this time?”
“I was playing with Howie and Rene, and I saw the baby, that’s named after you,” Latecia replied laughing.
“Oh really, and then what?” Win asked laughing.
“I chased Daemon,” Latecia said with a little grin of her own.
“You did? Well I bet you’re hungry, you want something to eat?” Win asked.
“Yeah! Will you eat with me?” Latecia asked putting her hands on each of Win’s cheeks.
“Of course I will, come on, I’m sure we can find you some pancakes,” Win replied as she walked off to find something for Latecia to eat, as she clutched at her neck.
AJ couldn’t help but swell with pride. Kevin noticed and hit him lightly.
“They make quite a pair don’t they?” Kevin asked.
“Yeah, they do,” AJ smiled looking back at Kevin. Nick smiled uncomfortably, not understanding what was going on.
“Oh you weren’t here when Daemon made the big announcement,” Kevin said touching Nick’s arm lightly. Nick relaxed, thank God they were getting on the subject of the regular tour stuff, at least this way he could avoid the whole Win, Nick, Jen, Taylor conversation, for a little while anyway.
“AJ and Win are back together,” Kevin said smiling. Nick’s face fell, that was the last thing in the world he had expected to hear and the last thing he wanted to talk about.
“You, you are?” He asked carefully, not wanting to look at AJ but feeling that he had to.
“Yup, we are. And don’t worry Nick, I’m not mad at you, you can breathe now,” AJ added laughing. Nick let out a long stuttering breath and laughed. Kevin however was confused, he wanted to know what was going on.
“What’s going on?” Kevin asked, his brow wrinkling.
“We’ll talk about it later,” AJ replied automatically.

Chapter 8
December 22nd 2005

After spending a few more minutes with Kevin and AJ, being assured that he wasn’t going to be killed he went off in search of Win. Whether or not he wanted to admit it, he had to talk to her, and it would be easier to do it sooner rather than later.
He searched the room for a few minutes until he found her speaking to a group of her old crew friends. She was laughing and smiling, he hated to do this to her. Taking a deep breath, he walked up to her and said,
“Hi Winifred.”
“What, oh you, hello, anyways, as I was saying,” Win continued, turning back to her friends. Nick wasn’t going to be perturbed by her cool attitude, he had expected that. Taking another breath he put his hand on her shoulder and forced her to notice him.
“What do you want?” she asked coolly.
“I’d like to speak to you for a minute, if that’s all right,” he replied.
“Fine, but keep your hands to yourself,” she replied walking away. He followed her and noticed she was walking towards AJ.
“Nick want’s me to talk to him, I’ll be back in a little while, don’t worry,” Win said squeezing his hand.
“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” AJ asked looking warily at Nick.
“Yes, I’ll only be gone a few minutes,” Win replied giving him a small smile.
“Lets go, my room,” Win said turning back to Nick and walking past him, out of the room.
The ride upstairs was silent and tense. Win walked ahead of him the entire way and left the door of the room open behind her. She was sitting at the table in the middle of the room waiting for him and pointing to the chair opposite her. Nick entered, closing the door behind him and took the seat she was pointing at. The silence lingered again before she spoke.
“So, what do you want to speak to me about?” Win asked.
“Win, I wanted to say I’m sorry and I wanted to explain,” Nick started, but Win cut him off.
“Explain,” she said raising her eyebrows, “What is there to explain! After all the crap we went through, after all the shit we put AJ, everyone through, and you want to explain!"
“I know, but Win, you don’t understand, after Jen and I broke up, I never really got over her.” Nick tried again, but Win really wasn’t that interested in listening to him. She didn’t even want to look at him.
“We were friends Nick, I’m not even talking about what we were going for, I mean, that happened in just a couple of months. But why couldn’t you talk to me? Jen is obviously very important to you, you were a couple for two years. Did you honestly think I wouldn’t understand?” Win asked.
“Win, it all happened so fast, we didn’t mean for it to, I swear,” Nick said desperately.
“After all the guilt I’ve been going through, for torturing AJ about you, and putting the rest of the guys through the ringer forcing them to accept this, and not think I was just trying to get back at AJ. Now they think I’m trying to get back at you by being with him!” Win said getting up.
“They said that?” Nick asked standing up as well.
“No, but it’s obvious enough. Dammit, I’m so sick of this!” Win shouted annoyed.
“So you and AJ are really back together?” Nick asked.
“Yes, and I can’t believe he took me back either.” Win replied.
“He should have been the one begging, Win he cheated on you,” Nick said annoyed.
“We are more than even on all accounts now! But what about you, I still don’t get how you and Jen could end up back together, and in bed none the less, I thought she said she was saving herself for marriage,” Win asked confused. She couldn’t believe it, she’d thought Jen was in love with Taylor, they’d seemed so perfect together.
“She lied. Taylor didn’t know. I was her first.” Nick replied.
“Oh, that makes real sense!” Win replied, still not understanding why it had happened.
“That night, after everyone was asleep, Jen came to talk to me. She wasn’t sure she was marrying Taylor for the right reasons. I’d set them up, a little while after we broke up so I could get over her and she over me, and I thought it had worked. After a year they were engaged. I thought I was happy for her, but I guess I wasn’t.” Nick explained. He felt some of the weight lifting off his shoulders now. At least a little bit. He’d been holding it in these last two years that he still cared about Jen. Pushing her together with Taylor had seemed like a good idea at the time, an easy way to fix their broken friendship and a way for them both to move on. But the wound had only been dug deeper every time he saw them together. And when they’d gotten engaged, he’d finally felt his heart break. When he met Win he threw all feelings left over for Jen onto her and pretended that it didn’t bother him anymore.
“So the two of you got carried away, right?” Win snapped.
“Yeah, I guess so,” Nick said sheepishly.
“I am so sick of that excuse Nick! You are a rational, thinking, human being! Alarm bells should have gone off in your head! You cannot just go with impulse Nick, that’s how people get in trouble, that’s how I got in this mess! I didn’t think, I just did what felt good, now, now, this is where we are.” Win replied, pacing her room. Her cell phone rang and caught her so off guard that she jumped.
“Damn thing, hold on a second,” she mumbled pulling out the phone and opening it.
“Hello? Oh hi, yes, Mr. Pastor, yes, I got your assistant’s message. Oh you’re in Paris, um okay. Tomorrow? Uh, sure, yes, yes, I can meet you and your wife, four o’clock, sure at the hotel, okay, I’ll see you tomorrow, yes, goodbye,” Win hung up the phone and stuffed it in her pocket and sighed.
“How is the foundation going?” Nick asked uncertainly.
“Great, it’s going great,” Win replied shaking her head and walking towards him again. She looked at him with a wounded stare.
“That’s good to hear,” Nick replied, avoiding the gaze.
“Nick, what are we going to do about this?” she asked.
“Win, I don’t know what to do. But can I just ask you something?” he said, finally looking at her and directly into her eyes. She nodded.
“Are you happy back with AJ? I mean really happy?” Nick asked.
“Yes, I am. I told him the truth, that I was looking for an excuse to stay away from him. We both know that if we could erase what would happen, we would. And to top it all off, he was honest with me. I couldn’t have asked for anything more than that.” Win replied.
“Do you ever think you could forgive me?” Nick asked.
“If you had made any effort to contact me Nick, maybe I could consider it. But you didn’t, you just stayed there, you comforted Jen. I know where I stand with you.” Win replied, her eyes stonily cold.
“Win, I love Jen, and you are such a good friend to me. But she needed me more, I couldn’t just leave her,”
“In an entire month you couldn’t make one damn phone call! Nothing! I get that you care about Jen, but she is not the only person in the world! You lied to me! You hurt me, and you hurt Taylor too! He was your friend too, but you don’t care about your friends much do you? That’s quite obvious! I should have expected it I guess, I mean if you could do that to Taylor, whom you’ve known for years, I shouldn’t have expected something from someone I’ve only known eight months!” Win screamed, past the point of being diplomatic.
“The one time I act out of impulse, in my entire life! I’ve never gone with my gut, or done anything that would gratify just me!” Nick shouted.
“Exactly! As soon as you start acting like an ass, is when it all came back to roost! I’m done with this Nick! Done!” Win shouted her final words, crossed to the door and walked out, slamming it behind her.
Nick slumped down in the chair again and held his head in his hands. He’d expected this, he’d known it was coming. Back in his mind he’d hoped Win would forgive him. She had forgiven AJ, he’d hit her, he’d cheated on her. But the nagging voice in the back of his head spoke up and said, “Yeah, but he was sorry about it and he told her the truth.”
He thought back over the month and wondered why he hadn’t called Win to explain, to talk to her. He’d tried; he’d picked up the phone a number of times and dialed before slamming it shut and deciding against it. He was a coward, and he knew it more than ever right now.

Chapter 9
December 22nd 2005

When Win returned to the party she found Latecia and picked her up before going back to AJ. He noticed Win carrying Latecia over and saw the look on Win’s face. That could only mean one thing, the talk with Nick had not gone well.
“How are my girls!” AJ said as Latecia jumped into his arms.
“Good daddy! But Winnie is sad, you need to kiss her to make her smile,” Latecia giggled.
“All right, maybe later,” Win said smiling slightly, patting Latecia on the back.
“Daddy, can I go see the baby again?” Latecia asked looking over to Brianna and baby Winifred sitting by the window.
“Sure you can, but don’t annoy Brianna,” AJ said setting Latecia down on the floor. Latecia nodded and raced over to Brianna with a grin.
“What happened?” AJ asked immediately as he turned to Win, grabbing her hand in his.
“I yelled at him, and told him I was done with him.” Win replied, looking down at AJ’s hand.
“Did he explain anything to you?” AJ asked.
“Yeah, he did, but it doesn’t make up for what he did,” Win replied.
“This has nothing to do with the fact that you two were supposed to be dating, does it?” AJ asked, finally catching on.
“AJ, he didn’t even have feelings for me. It was always for Jen, he was trying to avoid watching her and Taylor be together. It bothers me because he couldn’t be honest with me and tell me this before I found them, and before he hurt Taylor.” Win replied.
“All right beautiful, all right,” AJ said putting his arms around her.
“Can we just get out of here for a while?” Win asked, muffled by his chest.
“Yeah, let me just ask Brian to watch Latecia for a minute,” AJ said letting her go and staring at Win.
“It’s gonna be okay, I swear,” he said before calling Brian over.
“Hey, what’s up, what’s the matter Win?” Brian asked, looking at Win concerned.
“She and Nick had at it, would you and Brianna mind watching Latecia for a few minutes?” AJ asked.
“Sure, no problem, we’ll just take her back to our room if you want,” Brian replied, still looking at Win uneasy.
“Thanks man, I owe you,” AJ replied before taking Win’s hand in his.
“Don’t worry about it, see you later,” Brian replied before walking back to Brianna, Winnie and Latecia.
“All right, lets go,” AJ said pulling her out of the room.
A few minutes later they were back in his room, standing at the window watching the snow fall past in giant flakes.
“What’s really bothering you Win?” AJ asked.
“He lied, he, he hurt Taylor, then he didn’t even take the time to see if anyone else was all right.”
“And you don’t forgive him?” AJ asked surprised, looking over at her, watching her fold her arms and look coldly out on the falling snow.
“No,” she replied stiffly.
“But you forgave me.”
“Yeah, but you’re different AJ,” Win said shaking her head and looking at the floor for a minute. She kicked the edge of the rug around for a second then looked back up.
“I don’t really see how it’s that different,” AJ replied, turning so that he could stand and look directly at her.
“It is.” Win replied, swallowing hard. AJ thought hard for a moment. The only thing that had ever gotten Win mad was when he had cheated on her, but then again he had admitted it and she’d forgiven him. He thought some more, the only other time she ever got angry was when someone else had gotten hurt and she couldn’t do anything about it.
“You’re not angry about what he did to you, are you?” AJ asked, the realization finally hitting him.
“What? Of course I am, but that’s not it,” Win said annoyed.
“Oh really? Then why do you keep bringing up me and Taylor, when you should be the one that’s the most upset?” AJ asked removing his sunglasses and raising an eyebrow at her.
“Uh oh,” she thought to herself, “he’s bringing out the eyebrow again.”
“Because, you were hurt too, I’m not the only one,” Win said looking away from him.
“You’re upset because he used you to hurt me, and then Taylor, that’s what it is. You can’t stand not being able to stop him from doing that, you hate to see anyone get hurt,” AJ replied, slightly smiling at her.
“Well I’m sorry AJ, I don’t find it amusing when one of my supposed friends uses me to hurt someone I love.” Win snapped.
“I didn’t say it was, I just find it cute that you worry more about others than yourself. I mean, I’ve done enough to you as yet you’re still worried about me, and how this whole thing will make me feel,” AJ replied cocking his head and smiling at her.
“I didn’t say that,” Win snapped looking at him, his smile making her soften.
“You didn’t have to, I know you too well,” he laughed. She smiled at him.
“All right, so you found my weak spot,” she said, slightly defeated.
“Hey, I like your weak spot, especially when it’s me,” he laughed.
“When it comes to you AJ, yeah. You know I would do anything for you,” Win replied, looking thoughtfully out the window.
“Good thing you weren’t at the VMA’s a few years ago then, if you could yell at Nick,” AJ said laughing.
“The what?” Win asked confused.
“The Video Music Awards, for MTV. Jamie Foxx made a few comments about my sobriety, offered me champagne as we walked off stage,” AJ replied.
“Oh that’s just rich!” Win said annoyed.
“See, that’s what I’m talking about. Nick’s your friend and you screamed at him for hurting me in a roundabout way, I can only imagine what you would have done to him,” AJ laughed.
“Yeah, well, call me protective, or whatever it is, I don’t like seeing the people I care about get hurt.” Win replied wrinkling her nose and shaking her head at the thought of what that guy had said about AJ. Fact was it annoyed her so much because she knew how difficult it was being sober herself, and the battles you have to fight. She shook her head at the thought. She felt AJ's hands on her hips and looked at him.
“Win, look, I’m not upset ‘bout all that happened. In fact, I could even say that I’m glad, cause it got me back with you. I mean, if that’s all I have to go through, to get you back in my life, then I’ll forever be thankful,” AJ said gently squeezing her between his hands.
Win looked up at him, at the honesty in his eyes and suddenly she felt guilty for yelling at Nick.
“I shouldn’t have yelled at him like that,” Win said frowning.
“Yes, you should have,” they both looked up and saw Nick coming through the side door from Win’s room.
“You were listening?” AJ asked.
“Yeah, sorry, I was still in Win’s room, and I kinda listened in,” Nick said walking into the room, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. Win laughed.
“It’s all right Nick, really,” Win said smiling.
“Really, you sure?” he asked, still confused.
“Yes, I’m sure. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that, it wasn’t fair.” Win said again. Nick approached the two of them at the window and looked back and forth from AJ to Win.
“Uh, yeah man, about the whole, stealing your girlfriend thing, uh, sorry,” Nick said awkwardly, looking over at AJ. AJ laughed.
“It’s okay, sorry about the, you know,” AJ replied pretended to make a fist and wail it at him.
“Nah, you already apologized for that.” Nick laughed.
“Win, I am, so, so sorry that I did this, I should have talked to you, I should have explained things.” Nick said turning to her and taking her hands in his.
“Yes, you should have,” Win said nodding.
“And AJ, I’m sorry I couldn’t be honest about Jen, at the very least with you, instead of ripping someone you loved away from you,” Nick said looking up at him.
“Hey, I should be thanking you, in some weird way, cause I got Win back.” AJ replied smiling.
“Do you think we could ever be friends again?” Nick asked looking back at Win sheepishly.
“Of course Nick, but you also need to talk to Taylor, okay? Make sure he understands, he was your friend too,” Win replied squeezing Nick’s hands.
“So are you two okay now?” AJ asked.
“Yeah, I think so,” Win said smiling, “all right, just give me a hug so we can go back to just being friends.”
“All right,” Nick laughed as Win threw her arms around his neck and squeezed him. He squeezed her back and held her tight for a moment.
“Good, now that this is settled, do you think I could have my girlfriend back?” AJ asked with a smirk.
“Sure, thanks guys,” Nick said laughing as Win let him go and stepped towards AJ.
“You know, you two really deserve each other,” Nick said, letting his look linger on the couple.
“No I don’t,” they both said at the same time. They all laughed.
“That’s exactly why you do,” Nick smiled. He watched Win and AJ turn to look at one another, clasping their hands and watching their fingers intertwine. They came together and kissed. Nick, watched and smiled for a moment.
“I’ll just let you two alone,” he said carefully sneaking back to the door he came out of. He took one last look at the couple and whispered, “No one deserves your love more than you,” before he closed the door and walked away.

Chapter 10
December 22nd 2005

That afternoon, the whole group got together for lunch. This included all the guys, Win, Tessa, Brianna, Rene, Jen, Latecia and baby Winnie. Everyone except AJ, Win, Nick and Jen were surprised to see Jen with them. Of course that had been because no one knew what had gone on, but Brian noticed that Win seemed a lot happier than she had before when Nick had been around. But now Jen was hanging around again, now it made sense.
Brian had known that Jen and Taylor were going to spend Thanksgiving dinner with Nick’s family since they had been family friends from way back. That meant Nick and Jen would be in the same house. Something must have happened because otherwise AJ and Win wouldn’t be back together, and Jen wouldn’t be sitting so close to Nick. Besides, where was Taylor anyway? He did know that he’d gone back home to work, but what happened?
Howie was thinking along the same lines and was ready for that talk they would have later.

The time for their talk came soon enough and though AJ was anxious to get the truth out about him and Win, the truth about what had happened between Nick and Jen had to come out with it. And though AJ had no hard feelings towards Nick, he was worried the rest of the guys would be angry at him and at Win for dragging them all through the drama rama that had been going on the last three months.
AJ left Win with the girls, though he wasn’t really ready to let her out of his sight. Plus he wasn’t looking forward to the guys questioning Win’s motives. He knew that the guys, though they loved Win, they’d only known her for a minute in comparison to AJ so they’d be worried about him.
“Okay, so what the hell has been going on?” Howie asked once they were all seated in Kevin’s room. Howie looked first at Nick and then at AJ.
“Does somebody want to talk?” He asked again. AJ looked over at Nick who was slowly shrinking in his chair, trying hard to evaporate in front of everyone’s scrutinizing gazes. He felt bad for Nick, he did. Even though Nick had hurt Win, he still felt bad for the guy.
“Okay, first up, why are you and Win not going out?” Howie asked the most obvious question first to get it out of the way and get things rolling. Nick’s eyes flashed across the room to AJ and he just shrugged his shoulders.
“Well, Jen and Taylor came over to my parent’s house for thanksgiving and well, Jen and I kind of ended up in bed together.” Nick picked at his nails as he spoke.
“You what!” Kevin asked loudly.
“Yeah, and Win, well, she kinda walked in on us,” Nick continued, feeling smaller by the minute.
“Aw man, Nick, what were you thinking?” Brian asked as he shook his head in disapproval.
“I wasn’t. I mean, Jen, she came to talk to me, and she told me that she thought marrying Taylor was a mistake, and well, we got a little carried away,” Nick replied shrugging one of his shoulders.
“So that’s why Jen is suddenly hanging around you again?” Howie asked.
“And why Win was pissed at you too,” Kevin added.
“Yeah,” Nick replied pathetically.
“Win and Nick made up already though,” AJ added.
“That’s just fine and dandy, but why the hell are you two together again?” Howie asked.
“Because we want to be, and don’t say that you think she’s doing this to get back at Nick, she wouldn’t do that.” AJ replied. He knew that would be the first thing the guys would come up with.
“So you’ve already thought of that then?” Kevin asked concerned.
“Look guys, Win and I already talked about this, she wouldn’t do that to AJ to get back at me, I know she wouldn’t.” Nick said as he sat up in his chair, taking on a higher stature to go with the seriousness he was talking about.
“We really don’t know anything about her. I mean, you have to be realistic about this AJ. She said she didn’t want to be with you,” Howie replied, almost completely ignoring Nick except for giving him a narrow glance as he turned to AJ.
“That is exactly right, YOU don’t know anything about her. Why don’t you just let me worry about it?” AJ snapped.
“All right guys, lets not do this,” Brian said putting up his hands as if to mediate the group.
“Howie does have a valid point,” Brian started to say but AJ went to open his mouth and Brian held up his hand for him to be quiet as he continued, “But so does AJ. They are close, we don’t know what happened, and we don’t know what they talked about. Quite frankly it is none of our business.”
“It is our business when our brother could be getting hurt by her. I mean, look at the way things are going. She breaks up with AJ, and then goes after Nick. What, when it goes on the rocks with AJ again she’s gonna go after me?” Howie asked. At this both AJ and Nick shot up out of their chairs.
“She is not that kind of person!” AJ shouted.
“And she did not go after me! I was the one who asked her out!” Nick added.
“Oh even better!” Howie snapped.
“Look man, don’t even go there. Win and I are together. Okay? End of story. I am going to stay with that girl for as long as she’ll have me and you can’t do anything about it. So just back off,” AJ said angrily, going towards the door.
“I thought she was your friend too Howie,” Nick asked, shaking his head.
“She is, but not when she’s taking advantage of my brothers,” Howie replied darkly. He looked over to Brian and Kevin.
“Well, aren’t you two going to add anything?” he asked irritated.
“I agree with Brian. We don’t know what Win and AJ have said to each other. And I also agree that it may be none of our business. I don’t remember AJ asking us for advice. I mean, he’s happy, so what’s the matter with that?” Kevin replied as he sat back in his chair.
“Thank you Kevin, someone finally gets it!” AJ shouted with some joy.
“It became our business when this love triangle exploded in Brian’s back yard!” Howie exclaimed, wondering why they were being so thick.
“This isn’t a love triangle anymore. Win is with AJ, where she belongs, I’m with Jen, I’m where I belong and,” Nick was cut off by Brian.
“And Taylor is at home where he doesn’t belong. Maybe Win is okay with what happened, but it was still a shitty thing to do Nick. Taylor has gone on tour with us for years, and then you go and do this. If you and Jen wanted to get back together you should have figured out a better way.” Nick took on his ashamed little kid stance again. Brian’s disapproval was the worst thing he could have gotten out of this. He felt sick to his stomach.

Chapter 11
December 23rd 2005

After the talk, the guys all had found excuses to vacate and stay away from one another. As far as everything had gone, it seemed fruitless to beat it to death so it was best to just move on.
AJ had taken Latecia and Win sight seeing and had been enjoying a lovely afternoon with his girls when Win remembered that she had a meeting back at the hotel. She hurried back, apologizing to AJ and Latecia, promising she’d hurry back and meet them at the Eiffel Tower as soon as she was done.
When she got to the hotel she asked at the front desk if anyone had come in for her, and there were, a smart looking professional couple, waiting in the lounge. Win tried to make herself look dignified and went inside to greet them.
“Hi, how are you, I’m sorry to have kept you waiting, why don’t we take this upstairs, I’m afraid I don’t have any of my files with me.” They nodded in polite agreement and followed her upstairs.
After hastily, and supremely unprofessional manner, Win managed to gather her files and paperwork she’d been handling, she sat them down at the table.
“I really, have to apologize, once again, I really didn’t mean to be so unprofessional.” Win laughed at herself and they nodded again. The woman looked nervous, and as though she had been crying earlier. The man, though composed, did seem to give off a nervous energy as well.
“Uh, could I offer you anything, coffee, tea?” Win asked, trying to remember how to be a good host.
“No, thank you, we’re fine,” Mr. Pastor said with a smile.
“Okay then, then let’s get down to business. I believe Mr. Pastor told me he worked in the Law department at Princeton, and you Mrs. Pastor in the English department of the same college?” Win asked.
“Yes, we do.” Mrs. Pastor replied nervously.
“Actually, our name is Bastar, there must have been a mix up on the phone,” Mr. Bastar said with a nervous grin.
“Oh, I am so sorry, you know with those cell phones,” Win’s voice trailed off as the realization hit her with the force of a two ton truck. The room was silent as she sat there, her eyes immediately fixing on a point above their heads. No one moved, no one breathed and not a word was said for almost five solid minutes.
Win finally found her voice, and still not looking at them asked,
“What did you come here for?” More silence answered her, mocked her.
“To, to explain,” Mrs. Bastar said shaking slightly.
“Explain?” Win asked, thoroughly confused.
“Yes, Winifred, you see, we,” Win would not listen.
“I think you better leave,” she said stonily.
“But we just want to talk to you and-”
“I think you better leave.” Win stood, hurried to the door and opened it for them. Mrs. Bastar looked at her husband then at the door, tears pooling in her eyes. She got up and hurried out of the door, hitching a sob as she rushed past Win.
Mr. Bastar was slower to move. Before he got up he fished out something from his pocket and left it on the table. He walked to the door and stopped before going out, but Win kept her face averted.
“We just wanted to explain things. Maybe help you see our side of the story. Our intentions. We never wanted this to happen. As you could understand, we can’t have this sort of thing, hanging over our heads, our jobs, you know. But I understand you’re feelings. If you ever want to reach us, I left a card on the table. We won’t bother you again, I’m sorry for interrupting your holiday.”
When he was gone Win closed the door and ran to the table to shred the card and then throw it off the balcony. The wind blew fiercely when she opened the doors to the balcony and she looked at the tiny pieces of card that were shredded in her hand.
“Damn you,” she whispered, shaking her head and tossing the pieces into the wind.

Chapter 12
December 23rd 2005

AJ had been waiting at the Eiffel Tower for an hour and still Win had not shown up. After waiting in the cold for half an hour he took Latecia into a nearby café to get her some hot chocolate and warm up. She wasn’t answering her phone and the rest of the crew had not spoken to her the rest of the day. He didn’t know what was up.
At the two-hour mark he began to worry. Something was wrong, Win would have at least called him if she was going to be any later than an hour. He tried her phone again but there still was no answer.
“Daddy, can we go now? I’m hungry,” Latecia asked. AJ looked over at her and then at his watch.
“All right, we’ll go back to the hotel and get some dinner. I’m sorry you didn’t get to see the tower today baby, but we’ll try another day before we have to go, okay?”
“Okay daddy, let’s go. I want to eat dinner with Winnie tonight.”
“We’ll see baby,” AJ helped Latecia on with her coat, gloves and hat before they went back out in the cold to get a cab. They were back at the hotel within a few minutes and hurried in out of the cold and snow.
AJ tried Win’s phone again but she still wasn’t answering. He called Brian and found out the guys were in the dining room.
“Hey, how was the tower?” Brian asked Latecia as they approached the table they were sitting at.
“We didn’t get to go up,” Latecia replied, taking a seat at the table beside Brianna.
“What happened?” Brianna asked.
“I don’t know, Win didn’t show up, we were waiting for her for two hours. She said she had a meeting, but she would meet us there. I’ve tried her cell phone but she’s not answering. Have any of you heard from her?”
“I saw her go upstairs with some people on my way in, I guess they were the people she was meeting with, but I didn’t get a chance to talk to her.” Brianna replied.
“We haven’t heard from her at all either man,” Kevin added.
“All right, she’s probably still talking with them, I’m gonna try calling her room before I go up there so I don’t interrupt. Can you guys keep an eye on Latecia for a few minutes?”
“Sure man, don’t worry about it,” Brian nodded.
“Okay, thanks, I’ll be back in a minute. Be good Latecia, I’ll be right back,” AJ said as he leaned down to give Latecia a kiss.
“I will daddy. Get Winnie to come to dinner, okay?”
“I’ll try.” He gave her another kiss, thanked the guys and went back out to the lobby.
“Could you please call Winifred Caldon’s room?” AJ asked the woman at the counter.
“Yes sir, who shall I say is calling?”
“AJ.” She nodded and called the room. She waited for a long time but it was obvious that there was no answer.
“Sorry sir, but I do not think she is in, maybe try later?” AJ nodded and decided he better just go up to the room.
He knocked on the door but received no answer. He tried her cell phone again and heard the ringing through the door.
“Win? Are you in there? It’s me, if you’re in there, let me know!” AJ called through the door. Again, no answer. He shook his head annoyed, wondering what was going on. He returned to his room, using the door that went between the two rooms to get into Win’s.
“Win, baby? Are you in here?” AJ called as he opened the door. He looked through the suit and all the rooms were empty. He went back out to the main room and found her files open on the table and then there was her box of her keepsakes. On the top were the clippings he’d seen only when he’d taken Win home to meet his mother. “BABY FOUND IN DUMPSTER BEHIND CHINESE RESTAURANT” glared up at him as it had when he’d first seen it.
A gust of wind blew in the room and sent the clippings flying to the floor and he turned to find the doors to the balcony open. He went over to close the doors and found Win shivering in the snow in the corner of the terrace.

Chapter 13
December 23rd 2005

“Win! What the hell are you doing out here!” AJ exclaimed, rushing out to her, pulling her up from the floor. The snow that had accumulated on her head and shoulders was brushed away by AJ’s frantic hands as he pulled her inside.
“Win, Win, you got to talk to me baby, what’s wrong, what happened?” He took her over to the bed, her tiny frame still shaking as she sat, her arms folded on one another as she shivered. AJ took the comforter from the bed and wrapped it around her body to enfold her.
“AJ,” she managed to croak as her teeth chattered. He took her face in his hands and felt how cold she was. He rushed to the phone and had them send up more blankets, some hot soup, something that would warm her up.
“AJ,” she said again.
“What Win, what happened, please, tell me, what happened, why were you out on the balcony?”
“They, they were here, and I, I didn’t want, and they said,” she was incoherent.
“Who sweetie? Who was here?”
“My, they, the, I,” she stammered, tears welling up in her eyes. AJ heard the knock at the door and yelled for them to come in. A bellhop hurried in with the blankets, helping AJ wrap Win with two more heavy quilts.
“Explain,” Win mumbled, “they wanted to explain.”
“What sweetie? Who wanted to explain?”
“Them, them,” she motioned to the table where the clippings had been.
“Who sweetie?”
“My parents, they were here.” AJ understood and finally just threw his arms around her and hugged her close. She cried into his shoulder, her body shaking more from sobs than the cold now, but AJ didn’t let her go.
“I didn’t know, I didn’t know,” she wailed as his body rocked her back and forth, trying to comfort her.
“Baby, it’s okay, it’s okay, you’ll be okay, I love you Win, don’t you worry, you’re loved, you are loved, I’m your family, and I’ll never give you up,” AJ cooed as he held her.

A little while later Win was asleep and calm. AJ had managed to get the whole story out of her and was nervous at the thought of what this meant for Win, although she had explained that she had no intention of ever speaking to them. He didn’t know what to expect, or how this would affect her, affect them. He was worried that she’d be knocked off balance, just as soon as she’d gotten settled for the first time in her life.

Chapter 14
December 23rd 2005

AJ was already up the next morning, when Win woke up. She looked around her surroundings, not recognizing where she was for a moment. When AJ approached her with a cup of coffee, everything came flooding back and she remembered what had led to this moment.
The bed dipped on her left side and AJ’s familiar presence comforted her.
“Morning Beautiful,” he said as he pressed his lips to her cheek.
“Thank you baby,” she replied taking the coffee. He put his hand on her back and rubbed in circles as she drank.
“You feeling all right? It was awful cold out there last night.” AJ asked.
“Mm, I’m fine baby, really.” AJ let her drink some more coffee before he asked anything else.
“You want to talk about it?” She stilled, holding the coffee in her hand before her face.
“They wanted to explain to me, why they did it,” she said softly.
“Did they tell you?”
“They admitted to doing it so what else was there to talk about?”
“I see your point. But what about their intent?” She snickered.
“Intent? Funny, but I doubt that when they put me in a dumpster they intended me to live and actually grow up to be someone. I don’t believe in intent anymore. Intent is a load of promises that mean nothing to me anymore.”
“It did when I hit you.”
‘That’s different.”
“How?”
“AJ, don’t okay?”
“Why, just tell me, okay?”
“It doesn’t matter because you, AJ, I just love you, okay? You were provoked. It was understandable, and aside from that, there was no harm done.”
“I broke your nose.”
“Would you let me finish?”
“Sorry, go ahead.”
“No lasting harm. AJ, can you think of anything worse than leaving your own child for dead, not dropping them off at the police station, or leaving them where they could be found, but leaving them to die?” AJ thought for a long moment and did not know how to respond. But he had to.
“No.” He said solidly.
“They had no intention of me living. It was as if I didn’t matter. And I didn’t not until now, not until they realized I was alive. That I was alive, and that I might look for them, and I might turn them in.” She stood up and went to the window, looking out, her eyes becoming moist and she knew she was in for more tears.
“Why would you turn them in?”
“Because they are wanted for attempted murder. Leaving your infant in a dumpster in March is considered attempted murder, a felony. And he should know too,” Win sniffled and wiped at her tears. AJ watched from the bed and his brow crinkled in confusion.
“What should he know?” he asked, standing up, taking a spot beside her, turning to her, looking at her with his arms crossed as he waited.
“They’re both big professors at Princeton, she’s in English, he’s in law. He’s like the head of the department, you know. Big wig. This gets out, and well, they lose everything. It’s a wonder that they found me. But I suppose they kept up on the news.”
“They just came so that you wouldn’t turn them into the police?” AJ was stunned to hear this.
“Yeah, nice ain’t they?”
“Did you know they were coming?”
“I didn’t know it was them, I got their name mistaken, but then I realized,” here she stopped.
“Do you think you’ll talk to them again?”
“No,” she answered sharply.
“Perfectly understandable.”
“I just got my life figured out. Why’d they have to come in and throw it all off kilter? I’d come to the realization, I’d squared it away, and I’d made peace with it. They didn’t want me, now, twenty five years later, they find me, they come here, and, now I don’t know what to think.” She took a drink of coffee swallowing hard and looked over at AJ.
“I don’t need to know them to be complete. I know who I am, I’m Winifred Louise Caldon, I was loved and raised by I woman who cared about me. I’m smart, I can work hard, I can sing, I have friends, and I have you and Latecia. I don’t need anything else. I have you, you’re all I need. I’ve always been complete, I don’t need anyone to be complete. You AJ, you are just the perfect compliment. You are my family.” She brushed a hand through his hair and held his face in her hand.
“I’ll never not be your family. And God forbid, if we’re not always together, I’m still gonna love you, and I’m still gonna be your family. I’ll never let you go, I mean that, and I know that I’ve made some bad promises. But I will never abandon you, I could never do that.”
“I know you won’t AJ, I know, and I believe you.”

Chapter 15
December 23rd 2005

“What do you want to do today?” AJ asked when she finished her coffee. She put the cup on the nightstand and turned to look at him.
“I don’t know. This has just thrown me into such a mix up. I don’t mean to be bringing down your holiday or anything,” Win began but AJ quickly cut her off.
“There is no need to apologize. Win, this is your holiday too, I want you to be able to find a way to be comfortable with what happened, find a way to cope, and enjoy Christmas. It’s not your fault, and if you want to be upset for a while, I’m not gonna blame you, and neither will anyone else. Beautiful, you’re welcome to stay here, or you can go back to your room. That’s up to you. I don’t want you to feel that you have to do anything. The most important thing for you to do is figure out how you want to deal with this.”
“I just want to spend time with you, I just want to be with you and Latecia. Do all those things we were supposed to do yesterday. Look at it this way, if they hadn’t done what they did, I never would have met you, I never would have had Elizabeth, and those are a few good things that can cancel out all the bad. As a matter of fact, AJ, I want this to be the best Christmas I’ve ever had. It’s going to be with you, and Latecia, so it already is the best Christmas I’ve ever had.”
“You don’t have to do anything if you don’t feel like it Beautiful, I’m just letting you know. If you want to be left alone, that’s fine. Christmas or not, you did just have a big blow dealt to you.”
“Oh come on, you think I want to sit around here and mope? It’s Christmas, and I’m in Paris with the most amazing man on the planet, and I don’t want to mope around in some hotel room. I say we take Latecia to see the Mona Lisa, go shopping, go for a walk, get insulted by French people and eat snails. Lets do everything in France that you’re supposed to do when you come here!” Win’s face had broken out in a large smile as she spoke.
“You really want to eat snails?” AJ asked with a raised eyebrow.
“That’s the whole point! Have you ever tried snails, how do you know you don’t like them if you don’t try them? And, we should get a Christmas tree, for right here, decorate it with anything we can find, paper, popcorn, gum wrappers, anything!” Win got up and was looking through her bag for clothes to get changed into.
“Are you sure?” AJ asked.
“Yes, yes, hurry, get dressed, go get Latecia!” Win called, waving at him to hurry. He laughed a bit and gave Win a kiss before going to get his daughter.

The morning went fantastically. AJ had to pick up Latecia from Brian and Brianna so he invited them out with him and Win. The six of them had breakfast in a Christmas themed store and restaurant, drinking cocoa and eating toast with powered sugar and jam. Afterwards they went to all the shops of the biggest designers where Brianna found a new dress for her recouped figure. Latecia and Win tried on glamorous hats with large ostrich feather plumes, veils and sequins while AJ snapped pictures.
AJ and Brian modeled sleek suits and stylish hats for their ladies, wives, girlfriends and daughters respectively. AJ paraded around the room like a rooster until Latecia and Win were in a heap of giggling. They bought roses from the vendors on the corners of every street until they had a sufficient bouquet of red, yellow, white and pink roses. They wanted to go to this one posh restaurant, but figured they weren’t dressed appropriately, so they went back to the stores. AJ and Brian got their suits, Brianna a lovely pink gown and silver heels and Latecia in the most adorable green and red silk dress. Win looked stunning in a simple backless black dress, black heels, and an elaborate large brimmed hat, complete with a veil, a faux red fox stole and elbow length black gloves. Once they were changed, they set off for the restaurant.
They ordered one plate of escargo so that everyone could try a bite. Brian didn’t like it, Brianna didn’t care for it, Win ate it, it became Latecia’s new favorite food, and AJ never got to try his. When he tried to get the snail out, it slipped out of his grip, flew across the room and landed in someone’s water glass.
“To escargo!” AJ cheered, lifting his glass.
“To snails!” Latecia added, everyone laughing.
“To Christmas!” Brianna added, raising her glass.
“To adorable little girls,” Win added as she tickled Latecia.
“To AJ and Win!” Brian cheered, and they all clinked glasses, laughing and giggling at all the silliness they had done that day.

Chapter 16
December 23rd 2005

They enjoyed the rest of the day, taking a tour of the Louvre, walking the grounds around the Eiffel Tower, before taking the trip to the top. Brian was afraid of heights so he stayed at the bottom with baby Winifred, waiting in the gift shop under the building.
“It’s incredible up here!” Win shouted as she looked out over the lit up city. The night had come quickly and the entire structure blazed with lights and the city sparkled below them as if glitter had been scattered all over. Latecia twirled in excitement getting to see the view.
“It’s wonderful, it sure is,” Brianna remarked, leaning on the railing and looking out over the city. AJ took a picture of Win leaning out over the railing, her arms outstretched, taking in everything she could with all her senses.
“You feel like flying up here!” she laughed as AJ leaned on his elbows next to her on the railing. She did the same, pressing her shoulder to his.
“AJ, do you realize how beautiful you are?” Win asked, putting a gloved hand up to his face.
“Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?” he smiled.
“It’s so exhilarating up here. It’s like getting up on top of the world, above your problems, above everything that is wrong with the world. And you’re up here, you must be an angel AJ, you must be. You look so damn at home in the clouds and the stars. Up here where the wind is blowing and the snow falls. You got to be God’s most beautiful angel, and you’re standing here beside me, looking at me with brown eyes so sad that it makes a person want to cry and love you all the time.”
‘Wow, where did all that come from?”
“Maybe I’m turning into a poet, you never know,” she grinned at him, kissed him on the lips then turned to look at the view again.
“This is it, AJ, right here, this spot. It’s too magical to not want to do something magnificent and grand, something that your rationale would tell you is impulsive and rash. Have you ever just wanted to do something that makes you feel like you’re really alive, really living instead of just playing the part? Something so crazy, that you don’t even feel the breath of change in you until it’s happening?” She turned to him again and he was watching her with his head cocked.
“What did you have in mind?” he asked.
“AJ, if I knew the answer to that, I wouldn’t need my angel,” the snow was falling steadily and it fell in her hair and caught on her eyelashes. She looked like an iced cake, a perfect figurine in snow globe, lips rosy in the lights and smile radiant from her inner glow.
“So you want me to figure out something to do then?” he asked.
“Why not?” she turned to him again, serious this time. He felt his stomach jump and he realized what she might be talking about. His grandfather’s words boomed in his ears so loud he thought the entire continent could hear them.
“I would think about popping the question soon my boy, very soon. Do not let her get away.”
“Daddy! Lets go sing Christmas carols with Uncle Brian!” Latecia shouted, running at him full force and hitting him in the back of the knees.
“All right baby girl, lets go then.” AJ turned to see Win staring at him. She had a sweet smile on her face as she pulled her hat back on and readjusted her stole. He watched for a sign of something and saw her wink. It kindled the smallest flame in his heart, and he was glad to receive it. After all, it was Christmas, and if there was one gift he wanted, it was Win, and all that she entailed.
He stooped to pick up Latecia, Brianna following him and Win to the elevator and off the viewing platform. On the way down Win leaned into him and kept a hand on his back, pressing gently so as to remind him she was there. But he couldn’t have forgotten. She dominated his thoughts all the time. His thoughts were divided in two, one half for Latecia, the rest was all Win. He loved her for it. He loved that smile that left an imprint in his heart. He loved her for being his family. He loved her because he knew, for the first and last time in his life he had found true love. The kind that knew no physical understanding. The kind that took place only in subtle touches, knowing glances, connections of thought, no words involved. And that’s when AJ McLean fell, irrevocably and irreversibly in love with Winifred Caldon, when he knew it, admitted it and was not afraid of it.

Chapter 17
December 23rd 2005

The group strolled around the square as the snow fell, singing Christmas carols in harmony with one another, Latecia chiming in with words she made up from time to time, adding in Barbie dolls to the twelve days of Christmas along with peanut shells and lemons. AJ grinned as Latecia sang out, unafraid to have the world hear her.
Win walked by his side, content with being so close to AJ, Latecia and her friends. These were the kind of moments that she cherished, that she really relied on to keep the bad thoughts at bay. There was so much bad, but she wanted to conquer that bad feeling, with these good feelings that these people gave to her.
The definition of family was one that was becoming very clear to Winifred. She knew what she wanted and why she wanted it. She wanted to be part of a family because family meant security, acceptance, support, all the things she had lacked for the past seven years and missed. Family meant breaking off from the memories of hurt and loneliness she’d felt while living in the street. Family meant taking a step forward and embracing people, trusting them again. Family meant making commitments. Family meant committing to someone, being responsible to someone other then yourself. Family meant loving and all the risks that came with it.
As she walked beside AJ and sang those songs of love and Christmas time, her mind was else where. Her thoughts flickered back to the day before, that meeting, those people, her parents. She just couldn’t put it away. It bothered her. She wanted to know and she didn’t want to know. She hadn’t exactly been lying to AJ when she told him that she didn’t care, she felt that way at the time, but now, as she reflected, she did want to know. It was a natural thing to want to know where you came from, how you came to be, what you are made up of.
Explain, that’s what they had wanted to do, explain. Explain what? Explain when she had been conceived, why she was named Winifred, why she had brown hair or her pale skin? Explain why she had been abandoned? Explain why she had been put out on the street? Explain why they hadn’t been parents to her? Explain why after twenty-five years they were searching her out to explain?
And if she did know, what would come of it? Would she have some great insight to herself, her character, her life? Would the explanations help her any, would they be able to make some sense out of the hell she’d lived through? The more she thought about these questions the more she was torn. The more questions burned up in her brain, the more things she wanted to know. About her biological family, grandparents, aunts, uncles, maybe even brothers or sisters. Whether or not she had any other family at all.
“Something the matter Win?” AJ asked as they approached the hotel.
“Huh?” Win turned to him and realized they had already walked back, she’d been too caught up in her thoughts to notice anything else.
“You’ve been quiet all the way back,” AJ continued as they went into the foyer.
“Just thinking, that’s all.”
“What about?”
“Oh, everything, nothing, you know. That kind of thing.”
“Anything you want to talk about?”
“Not especially, no.”
“All right, but if you do, you’ll tell me, right?”
“Yeah, I will. I’m just gonna go get changed into something a little more comfortable, I’ll meet you and Latecia in the restaurant in an hour, okay?” Win replied as she pulled her hat off. AJ looked at her uncomfortably.
“Are you sure you’re all right?”
“Yeah, I’m fine, I’ll be down in a minute.”
“All right, but if you’re not down in an hour I’m coming up to get you, okay?” AJ warned.
Win smiled and rolled her eyes.
“Okay, I will,” he gave her a kiss and allowed her on her way, an unsettling feeling floating in his stomach.

Chapter 18
December 23rd

“Hey, AJ, what did you do today?” Howie asked as AJ sat down at the table. Howie was reading the paper but did not bother to look up as he read. He and AJ were not exactly on the best terms ever since he had insulted Win on the day they arrived. AJ tried to keep up the pretense, mimicking the tone of Howie’s voice, telling him this was not the time for such pettiness.
“Lunch, with Bri and the girls.”
“Win hit on Brian yet, or is she saving that for the end of the tour?” Howie snapped.
“I’m not in the mood for this D, so you better lay off.”
“Why, too close to home?”
“I wouldn’t be saying shit like that right now, if you know what’s right,” AJ muttered angrily. Howie gave up any pretense of pretending he was reading and closed his paper, tossing it on the table.
“I don’t think you should be letting her back in so easily AJ, I don’t trust her anymore.”
“You don’t trust her? What are you so worried about?”
“You are my best friend AJ, I’m worried about you. You getting busted up over this girl,” he explained. AJ sat back and gave a frustrated sigh, rubbing his temples.
“The only one who is busted up D, is Win. She’s been having a really bad time of it the last few weeks.”
“Oh, you mean finding Nick with Jen, then hopping back into it with you? I imagine it’s been real tough,” Howie snapped.
“I wouldn’t be talking about things I didn’t understand if I were you, D,” AJ said softly, not looking at his friend.
“And why would that be? Afraid that I’m getting to the truth?”
“Jesus Christ Howard, could you give the girl a break!” AJ finally shouted. Howie was taken aback, AJ hadn’t called him Howard in very long time.
“What’s up then?”
“There is some shit going on, and she doesn’t need you all of this crap in her face, okay?” AJ replied.
“What shit is going on?”
“It’s none of your business!”
“What, is she messing around or something?”
“Howie,” AJ growled.
“What then? What is it?”
“It’s not my place to tell you, okay?” AJ tried.
“Look, I don’t exactly see why I should tip toe around her, so you got to tell me. What’s wrong, is she in trouble? Did something happen?” Howie put his anger away and looked to his friend. AJ could tell that Howie was concerned, not just blowing hot air.
“She, well, she got a big jolt the other day.”
“What happened?”
“Her parents found her.” Howie’s jaw dropped and his eyebrows furrowed.
“They found her? How, I mean, how could they have found her?”
“Through the foundation. They called up making like they wanted to make a donation and got a meeting with her.”
“She met her biological parents?”
“Supposedly, that’s what they told her. Thing was, they didn’t want to find her, to explain what happened. They basically admitted that they did it and asked her not to report them.”
“Holy hell, you mean, they tried to get rid of her?” Howie breathed, sitting back in his chair.
“I keep forgetting that you guys don’t really know how she ended up an orphan. The police found her in a dumpster behind a restaurant. Her parents are charged with attempted murder.”
“They tried to kill her and now they want her not to report them?”
“That’s right. But what doesn’t make sense, is if they didn’t want her to report them, why did they find her. She never had any intention to go look for them, I mean, it would have almost been impossible. She didn’t even have a birth certificate.”
“Do you honestly think that Win would turn them in even? I don’t she’d be capable of doing it,” Howie reflected. His stomach flooded with guilt, he’d been accusing Win, and being horrible to her and he just hadn’t known.
“I don’t think that’s what she’s worried about at this point. She’s just been shaken up. She’d made peace with all of this before and now it’s like the wound has been opened up all over again. She doesn’t know what to do with herself.”
“Did she talk to them?”
“No. She told them to leave. I don’t blame her. She says she doesn’t need to know them to be complete, and on some level I think she believes that. But on another, I think she does want to know them.”
“It’s only natural to be curious, I’d be more worried about the fact that she doesn’t want to know.” Howie replied.
“Do you see what I mean Howie? Do you really think that she could do what you were thinking of, especially considering how much she’s been through?”
“AJ, I’m gonna be honest with you. We’ve only known Win, for what, nine ten months, less than a year. Lets face it, her story isn’t conventional. Former drug addict, homeless, she gets a job, a promotion and a deal in less then six months, while she’s dating you. You have to ask yourself if you don’t find some things a little coincidental.”
“Win turned down Clive’s deal, remember,” AJ growled.
“Yes, I know that, but AJ, you remember the number of girls you went through, who were just after your money. And when Nick and her were at it, well, you just never can tell.” AJ let this sink in and thought about it. But it still wasn’t right.
“First off, what you need to remember is that Nick asked Win out on a date, not the other way around. Second, that never would have happened if I hadn’t pushed her away. Third, Nick was there for her, helped her through, took care of her when I hit her. They are better friends for it and I wouldn’t change it. Fourth, Win got that promotion because Daemon looked into her folder and made some inquiries. Five, Clive offered her a deal before she ever met us and turned that down as well. Six, I have tried to give Win money, numerous times, but she would not take it, not in any shape or form. Seven, Win’s been through some pretty traumatic shit in her lifetime, and would never do something to purposely hurt anyone. And eight, she loves me, I love her, so I trust her. Did I get it all?” Howie sat in stunned silence for a moment.
“I think so.”
“Good.”
“I’m sorry AJ, I really am.”
“I’m sure you are, damn,” AJ sighed, running a hand over his face.
“What’s the matter?”
“I just hope she can deal with this, I’m really worried about her.”
“Did she talk to you about it?”
“A little, but she didn’t really want to, and I didn’t want to force her.”
“Do you think that she’s gonna stay for the rest of the tour?”
“Why would she leave?”
“She might want to go find her parents. She might want to get to know them, find out about her past.”
“I don’t think she’d just up and go though. Maybe on our break or something. Win would never leave the tour in a lurch. Besides, she’s still in shock.”
“No, I know that, Win wouldn’t do that. I just mean, it’s been a lot of stress on her, she might not be thinking straight.”
“You’re right, we just gotta take it easy. One step at a time.”
“That too.”
“All right, I’m gonna check on her, she said she’d be down in a little while, but I don’t want to leave her alone for too long, she says she doesn’t want to talk about it, but I have a feeling she’s going to be brooding. I’ll see you later D,” AJ said as he got up from the table.
“Take it easy man.” AJ nodded and left the dining room.

Chapter 19
December 23rd, 2005

“Knock knock, can I come in?” AJ said as he opened the door joining the two rooms.
“Sure, come on in.” Win called from the bed. She had her lap top open and she was busy looking for something.
“Business as usual already?” AJ asked, closing the door and strolling over to the bed. He slipped off his shoes and took a seat beside her, looking to see what she was doing.
“Hardly, it’s two days before Christmas. Besides, Daemon and I cemented all the particulars for the 26th weeks ago. This is a little, personal research.” AJ looked at the website she was browsing. Princeton.edu.
“Personal research?”
“I told you that my biological parents were professors at Princeton, so I thought I’d try and dig up a few things.”
“What are you trying to dig up?”
“I don’t know, some facts about them. What they really do, what their first names are, what books they like to read. I don’t know, anything really. I know I said I didn’t want to know them, that I didn’t need to know, but the curiosity is killing me. I never had parents, I never knew where I came from. I could have a chance to know, all those silly things, that may be insignificant to you, but mean a lot to me.”
“Win, you do whatever you need to do to make peace with this. You want to do this, you do it Beautiful.” He pressed a kiss on her cheek.
“Thanks AJ, for being understanding. You’ve really been great through all of this, you really have. I mean, how many days back into us being an ‘us’ and look what you have to put up with. It’s not fair.” Win replied, closing and pushing the computer away from her.
“I’m not putting up with anything Beautiful, I love you, when you hurt, I hurt. I just want you to know that all of this, all you’re going through, I don’t understand, I can’t imagine what it must be like, but I want to, so I can help you get through it.” He inched closer to her and put his arms around her, pulling her close.
“Yeah?” she asked, turning her head to look at him.
“Yeah, I do.” He laughed and she smiled, leaning into him.
“So you’re not sorry you’re with me again, considering all my past entails?”
“Everybody has a past.”
“Not like mine.”
“Then you wouldn’t be you.”
“But still,” Win continued.
“Beautiful, I love you, okay? And everything that it entails. Besides, what does it matter if we’ve only been an ‘us’ for a day or two? I never stopped loving you like I did, and did you stop loving me?”
“Not for a second.” He squeezed her and pulled her tighter against him.
“Then we always were an ‘us’.”
“Do you want kids?” Win asked. AJ was taken aback by the question.
“Why would you ask that?”
“It’s a simple question, besides we’ve never talked about stuff like that, I’d like to know.”
“Well it’d be kind of presumptuous of me to say I don’t want kids. Considering I already have Latecia, and I would never give her up, never.”
“I mean, do you want anymore children? How many, how many years apart, you know, that kind of thing. What do you want to happen in the future?”
“That’s a loaded question.”
“Yeah, but you can understand where I’m coming from, can’t you?” Win was thinking that he was upset by the question whereas he was overjoyed. He let go of her slightly so that she could see he was smiling. She turned to face him, brushing her fingers over his cheek.
“I completely understand. And what I want is not the only thing that matters. What do you want Beautiful?”
“You first,” she laughed. He smiled and took her hands in his.
“First of all, after this tour, I’m gonna start working on my solo stuff, just as is Brian, Howie and Nick. Work on my clothing company things like that. But, I want to start a family. I never had an exact number of kids, but I do want some, and there’s no ideal number or time for them to come. Putting limits on things like that is dangerous.”
“But you do want kids, right?”
“Yes, I do.”
“Good, so do I.”
“Is there something you’re not telling me?” AJ asked with crinkled brows.
“Hardly. I just wanted to know, that’s all. It’s good to know.”
“Win, are you sure there’s nothing you’re not telling me?” AJ asked. She got up from the bed shaking her head.
“Yeah AJ, I’m pregnant, yup, with twins, no, triplets, yeah. Don’t get carried away yet,” Win said as she approached her closet. AJ wasn’t put off and followed her.
“Win?” he asked, stepping up beside her. He put a hand on her side, stilling her as she was looking through her clothes.
“I just want to know what my future could entail, okay baby? I’m not used to being able to think about the future. I’ve been on the day by day for so long, that it’s just nice to know that I could think about something and plan something other than worrying about where I’m going to sleep, how I’m going to get food. That’s it, okay?” she turned to him.
“Of course, yeah, I’m sorry beautiful, I didn’t mean to push you.” She turned to him and put her arms around his neck, playing with the chain he wore.
“It’s just nice to know that I have something to look forward to. That I have something other than disappointment waiting for me. You’re the best thing I’ve ever had, I don’t want to scare you off.”
“No, no, no Beautiful. You’re not scaring me off. I love that you see a future with me. I do, I’m not afraid of commitment, okay? I’m not, you could never scare me off. I love being a father, I really do and I would love to be with you for the rest of our lives. I’m happy with you, I love you, I love being with you. Nothing could change that.” She hugged him tight, closing her eyes as relief washed over her. She was comforted even more as he wrapped her up is his arms.

Chapter 20
December 23rd, 2005

“Are you ready to go get some dinner?” AJ asked.
“Yeah, I suppose so. Can you promise me something?” Win asked, looking up at him.
“What Beautiful?”
“Never mind,” Win said, shaking her head.
“Really, what?” AJ pressed.
“No, nothing. It was silly.” She patted his chest and pulled out of his arms. She tried to walk away but he held her wrist in his grasp.
“Nothing’s silly Beautiful. Now what did you want me to promise you?” He saw the flicker of fear in her eyes and tried his best to comfort her with his gaze.
“Um, I wanted you to promise me, that you’ll, you’ll be the best father you can possibly be to Latecia. I mean, it’s not really my business, but, I see her, and in a way, I see me. The way I saw baby Winnie, and it’s, well, it’s hard to explain.”
“Come here, come on, I know, it’s okay, and you don’t have to worry if it’s your business or not,” AJ gathered her in his arms again and she let him do it.
“I just hope that people realize how special their children are. I saw so many kids thrown away. Kids that just needed one person, someone like you, to love them. To care about them.” AJ felt her tears dampening the shoulder of his shirt but he didn’t care.
“Hey, maybe we should just chill up here for a while, okay? We don’t have to do anything, just sit together, okay?” She nodded and agreed. She allowed him to steer her back to bed and crawl under the covers. She leaned into him and relaxed, listening to the sound of his heart beating. She felt safe and comfortable with him, but she had a nagging sense in the back of her mind about what had happened the day before, and she wasn’t quite sure she was comfortable with it.

Downstairs, Howie was sitting with Kevin and Nick, explaining what AJ had told him. He made it clear that this information was to go no farther than them, because he probably should not have been talking about it in the first place.
“Don’t bring this up, especially to Win, she may not want this getting around, okay?” Howie said earnestly.
“So does that mean you’re done persecuting her now?” Kevin asked as he crossed his arms.
“I wasn’t persecuting her,” Howie retorted.
“Right,” Nick scoffed.
“Hey, you’ve got no room to talk there buddy,” Howie pointed a finger in his direction.
“No?”
“Look, bottom line, Win’s going through a lot. We don’t need to be throwing anything else in her face, about anything, all right?” Kevin said, looking from one man to the other. They gave each other sidelong glances and then grudgingly agreed.
“So how are you and Jen getting on anyway?” Kevin asked.
“Good, I think that we’re gonna make it this time,” Nick replied.
“Oh? Not gonna fix her up with Daemon next?” Howie snapped.
“Hey, knock it off would you?” Kevin snapped.
“Yeah, sorry.” Howie mumbled, taking a gulp of coffee.
“You talk to Taylor yet?”
“No.”
“When are you going to?”
“I don’t know.”
“You have to talk to him Nick, explain, you know you have to,” Kevin continued. Nick felt like he was shrinking again.
“I know. I know, I really do. I don’t think he wants an explanation though. I mean, would you want something like that explained to you? Would you care the reasoning behind it as long as it happened?” Nick asked.
“Maybe the kinder thing to do would to be to just let him alone. Let the wound heal and not pick at it,” Howie said softly.
“You think so?” Kevin asked seriously, turning to him.
“Lets face facts here. Nick and Jen are together again, and well, if he tries to explain what happened, well, he’s not even going to get that far, now is he? Taylor never really was one for understanding things like that. Besides, he really did care about Jen, he’s not gonna want to know that they are doing okay.” Howie explained.
“You got a point there,” Kevin replied thoughtfully.
“I think what we need to focus on is getting things back to normal. As normal as they can be, but normal none the less.” Howie continued.
“You’re right on that count,” Kevin nodded, Nick didn’t look up from his hands.
“What are you knuckle heads up to?” AJ asked, making all of them jump.
“Damn man, when did you sneak down here?” Kevin asked, holding his hand to his chest, trying to regain a normal heart rate.
“Just now. I came to pick up Latecia and take her to bed. I feel really bad, poor kid, hasn’t had me for so long then I’m always leaving her with Brian and Brianna. ‘Sides, it’s not fair that I keep dumping her on them.” AJ replied as he stood between Kevin and Howie.
“They don’t mind. And really, if Brian knew what was going on with Win, he’d understand,” Kevin nodded.
“You told them, didn’t you?” AJ asked, crinkling his brows as he looked at Howie.
“Man, I’m sorry, but I swear, I only did it so that they would understand what was going on. I wasn’t the only one who had my misgivings about Win again, and it’s better if they at least know. But really and truly, this is as far as I’m spreading it.” Howie watched as the furrow in AJ’s brow softened.
“All right, okay, I know.” He let out a sigh.
“How is she doing, really?” Nick asked.
“It’s hard to say really,” he took a seat at the table, “One minute she’s fine, the next she’s worrying about finding them again. She wants to know about her past then she doesn’t want to be dependent on it. I just hope she can find some peace with all of this.”
“Would you mind if I went up and talked to her?” Nick asked timidly.
“What? No, actually, I think she might appreciate that. That’s a good idea Nick.” Relief washed through Nick and he finally smiled.
“Great. I’ll go up right now,” Nick was out of his seat in a flash and gone from the room.

Chapter 21
December 23rd, 2005

Win heard the knock on the door and wondered who AJ had sent to baby-sit her. She knew he was only trying to be supportive but what she really wanted was just some time to relax with her thoughts. Not even think, but just be able to be quiet and figure out what she wanted to do about things. Honestly she was tired of thinking about it, tired of talking about it really.
“Who is it?” she called, not willing to get up and answer the door.
“It’s Nick, can I come in?” She took a deep breath and nodded to herself.
“Yeah, come in.” He stepped inside and found her sitting by the window, a book turned down in her lap.
“Am I interrupting something?” Nick asked, referring to the book in her lap.
“No, I was just trying to take my mind of some things.” She was sure that AJ had informed everyone about what had happened, but she didn’t have the energy to care. Besides, they’d find out at some point.
“AJ told us,” and before he had even the sentence out she was nodding.
“I figured as much. And I’m not concerned about it.”
“How are you doing?”
“Honestly?” He nodded. She turned to the window and closed the book, tossing it on the table before turning back to him.
“I’m totally confused. I don’t want to think about it, I don’t want to talk about it, but it’s all sitting on top of my head.”
“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
“I don’t need to be baby sat, I’m okay really.” Win insisted.
“You want to know what I think?” Nick asked.
“Why not?”
“That maybe you should be left alone for a little while, to process all this. Look, I just wanted to let you know, I’m here for you. When you want to talk to somebody, come find me. I’ll tell AJ that you just need a little time to yourself, I’ll tell everybody, okay.” She let out a sigh and smiled.
“Nick, I really love you boy, that’s the nicest thing you could ever do for me right now. Really it is.” Relief washed over her features and he saw her visibly relaxing.
“Not a problem. This is my Christmas gift to you though, don’t go expecting nothing else from me,” he laughed as she swatted at him. They shared a chuckle.
“That felt good. Thanks Nick, really, I mean that.” He nodded and gave her a hug before leaving the room. She stared at the door for a moment after he left and sighed long. Finally, some peace and quiet so she could relax.

Nick spread the news not to bother Win and no one was surprised, not even AJ. When it was time for him to go back to his room he didn’t disturb her by going in. Instead he called her and wished her good night.
“Thanks AJ,” Win said as she sat in bed, her laptop propped up on her knees.
“For what?”
“For respecting that I need some time alone. I know it’s not the most compatible time, but I need it.”
“Beautiful, I told you, even if it’s Christmas, you can’t help the way things happen. We’re gonna have a lot more Christmases, and if you don’t want to celebrate, I’m not gonna hold it against you.”
“Thanks baby, you’re the best.”
“Look, I promised Leti that I’d take her to another museum tomorrow, it doesn’t open till noon so we’ll leave here around eleven thirty. Give me a call by then if you want to go, okay? But no pressure though.”
“I’ll call you if I want to go. Thanks AJ.”
“You don’t have to keep thanking me. Good night Beautiful, I love you.”
“I love you too AJ, good night.” She hung up the phone and looked at it sadly. She felt bad for what she was thinking about but turned back to the computer to finish what she was doing.

Chapter 22
December 24th, 2005

“Happy Christmas Eve Day!” Latecia giggled as she jumped up onto her father’s bed.
“Feliz Navidad,” AJ muttered into the pillow.
“No daddy, it’s not Christmas yet,” Latecia laughed, jumping on her father.
“Please, baby girl, just five more minutes,” AJ laughed as he turned over to tickle Latecia.
“Nope, sorry daddy, not today, not on Christmas Eve. Can I call mommy?” Latecia asked.
“You can call your mommy any time you want baby, any time. My phone is on the desk, you know your phone number right?” Latecia rolled her eyes at her father.
“Yes daddy!”
“Look at you miss attitude, go on, go called your mother,” AJ swatted her on the behind and she took off with a giggle. AJ sat up and rubbed at his eyes, ran a hand through his hair and looked around the room. It was only around eight in the morning so it’d be about two o’clock in Florida. Latecia managed to get her mother on the phone without AJ’s help. He showered and dressed while Latecia gabbed with her mother in Spanish and English.
When she was finished AJ spoke to Edith, assuring her that everything was all right and wished her a merry Christmas, promising that Latecia would call her the next day. He looked towards Win’s door and wondered if he should break his promise and just go see her, but he didn’t want to do that, he didn’t want to but in. So he respected her wishes and took Latecia down to breakfast.

“How is she?” Brianna asked as AJ and Latecia sat down at the table.
“I don’t know. I’m respecting her wishes, she wants to be left alone for a while, so I’m letting her be alone.”
“Did you talk to her last night?” Brian asked.
“I told her good night. Honest guys, if she wants to talk, she’ll come out and say so. I told her if she wanted to come out with me and Latecia to give me a call. If she doesn’t call, it means she just wants some time to herself. We can’t rush her, she’s had a lot happen.” AJ picked up the menu and opened it up. He figured out what Latecia wanted then ordered for both himself and Latecia when the waiter came around again.
“Are you sure you don’t want to just call her, make sure she’s all right?” Brianna asked anxiously.
“Brianna, I’m worried just as much as you are, but this is what Win wants. And it’s not unreasonable. If I had been smart I would have realized that myself before Nick did. I don’t want to be a jerk about this but I think we really need to just but out for a while. We really don’t understand what she’s going through, and it’s time that we let her try and figure things out for herself. When she wants help, I think she’ll ask for it.” Brian and Brianna looked at him with somber faces.
“Daddy, how come Winnie isn’t eating breakfast with us?” Latecia asked. AJ turned to his daughter and put a hand on her head.
“She’s had a big surprise, and she needs some time to think about things.” AJ tried to explain as best as he could to a four-year-old.
“You mean like when you found out you were my daddy?”
“Um, something like that yes, although, that was a happy surprise. This wasn’t a happy surprise, and she wants to be alone for a while, okay?” AJ asked, his daughter’s shining eyes smiling at him.
“But it’s Christmas daddy, doesn’t she want to celebrate Christmas with us?” He frowned slightly, seeing the disappointment in the child’s eyes.
“I know she does, but this thing, this surprise, it means a lot more to her than Christmas. And she may miss Christmas. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you any less, okay?” AJ nodded, stroking his daughter’s hair.
“I know Winnie loves me. I just wish she didn’t have to be sad on Christmas, that’s all. I’m sorry it wasn’t a happy surprise, like, a bunny rabbit, no, another pet rat, that’s it daddy.” Latecia smiled and AJ laughed.
“What, you want to get her a rat for Christmas?” AJ asked.
“No, no, Winnie said that boy rats don’t like to make new friends when they get older, so she wouldn’t be able to have another rat. But do you think we could find a toy rat, a stuffed animal, for her, for Christmas, even if she doesn’t want to spend it with us?”
“I’m sure we could. I bet she’d like that a lot.” AJ grinned at his daughter.
“Good, then we can do that today instead of the museum.” Latecia beamed at her father and he returned the sentiment.

Win sat in the middle of her bed, looking out the window, watching as the snow drifted lazily past the panes. It was Christmas, in Paris, she could be sure of that. But she couldn’t think about that now. She couldn’t be happy about that now. She wanted to be happy, but it didn’t look like that’s what she’d be getting for Christmas.
Around her on the bed lay everything she could find about her parents. They hadn’t lied when they said it would ruin them if what they did got out. He, his real name Frank Esters, was head of the Princeton Law Department, professor, a practicing attorney with a record to rival any lawyer in the country. She, was Lily Esters, his wife, Chair of the Princeton English Department, a published author, professor and part time editor for various publishing companies. They had both been born and raised in upstate New York. Attended prestigious Ivy League schools. Married out of college, had four children, two girls, two boys. Heather Marie, Elizabeth Sonya, Frank Erik Junior and Malcolm Warner. The youngest was seven years old, the oldest was twelve.
Both had important families, Frank’s father a lawyer, his mother a professional pianist, Lily’s mother was an English professor as well and her father was another lawyer. The whole happy family history could be found on the Internet. Pictures, jobs, even ways to contact them. They had their own websites. Frank for his law firm, Lily for her books.
Win read over everything she could find, scrutinized every photo she printed out, made notes on every article she found Frank or Lily’s names in. But she still didn’t know them. She still didn’t know what to make of any of it.
She fell back among the stacks of paper and notes she had printed out and yawned so hard she thought her jaw would break. She hadn’t slept all night. She’d just searched and searched until there was nothing else she could find, but it still wasn’t enough. She wanted to know more. She did. No matter what she told herself, she wanted to know more.
Exhausted she fell into a shallow sleep, hoping that when she woke, she’d have some answers to her questions.

Chapter 23
December 24th, 2005

AJ waited for Win’s phone call, but it never came. He allowed Latecia to drag him to every store they could find, looking for a suitable stuffed animal rat. He humored her as much as he could, but it was hard to pay attention as he worried about Winifred.
They worked their way from one store to the next and as the day wore on, the more he worried. They returned to the hotel for lunch, but no one had seen or heard from Win. After lunch they went back out and finally found the perfect stuffed rat. It looked just like Jack, the sales lady even dipped the tail into some white paint to make it really look like Win’s rat. Latecia was delighted and couldn’t wait to give it to Win the next morning.
They had the rat wrapped then they went out to find a Christmas tree and ornaments. AJ invited Brian, Brianna, Nick and Howie to help them put up the tree in his room so that they could gather around the tree the next morning and open gifts. Kevin and Tessa would have joined them, but they were busy visiting Tessa’s parents who lived in Paris.
Once the tree was set up, it was time to decorate. As the group sat around making decorations and talking, AJ looked towards Win’s door and sighed.
“No word yet, huh?” Brian asked.
“Not a peep.” AJ shook his head sadly.
“You think you should call her or something, at least knock on the door?” Nick asked.
“She’s missing Christmas, you’d think she’d want to celebrate, wouldn’t she?” Brianna asked.
“I don’t know. She’s been thrown through a loop. It wasn’t exactly the best timing, but you can’t force her to be happy on Christmas if she doesn’t want to.” Howie replied as he shrugged his shoulders. Brian helped Nick with untangling a string of lights he and Brianna had bought in the hotel gift shop.
“But it’s been an entire day, you might want to check in,” Nick added.
“You might be right, I should try.” AJ got up to find his phone, patting Latecia on the head as he passed her.

Win stuffed her clothes into her bag and stuffed Jack’s cage into his traveling tote to protect him from the cold. She checked and double checked her things. She cursed herself when she realized she had left her book and calendar of appointments in AJ’s room. But she’d have to do without it. Besides, she wouldn’t really need it now.
Everything was packed. Now all there was to do was wait to leave. That was a few hours away, but she had to make sure that if AJ did come to see her that he didn’t see the bags. So she stuffed everything in the closet, leaving out only a sheet of hotel stationary and a pen. She’d have to leave a note.

“She’s not answering her phone, maybe I should knock on the door?” AJ asked as he hung up.
“Are you sure you want to do that?” Howie asked.
“I don’t know, I’m gonna try anyway.” AJ went over to the door and knocked three times.
“Yeah?” came through the door.
“It’s me Beautiful, just wanted to check in on you. Are you all right?” AJ called. He heard a shuffling as if she was coming to the door to open it. But it didn’t open.
“I’m fine.”
“The guys are over, so is Brianna, we’re putting up the tree, I thought you might like to come over and help decorate it.” There was a long silence.
“Maybe later. I’ll be over later, okay?”
“All right, just come on over when you’re ready.”
“Okay.” He waited for her to say something else but there was nothing left to say. He walked away from the door shaking his head.
“She’ll come around,” Brian assured him.

Win sat on the floor against the door, her knees hugged to her chest.
“I’m sorry AJ, but I have to know,” she whispered to herself. She checked her watch and wiped away her tears. She hurried up, grabbed her bags and her rat, left the note on the desk and went out the door.

Chapter 24
December 24th, 2005

“Man, she’ll come over, I know she will.” Nick assured him as they relaxed on the couch. “It’s a Wonderful Life” was playing on the TV in front of them, while Latecia dozed in her own chair.
“It’s almost eleven. You should go get some sleep,” AJ said as he got up off the couch, grabbing the soda cans that had accumulated during their four-hour waiting session. Brian, Brianna and the baby had gone back hours ago so they could get to bed.
“What I should be doing is helping you bring out the presents for miss Latecia there.” Nick motioned to the sleeping little girl and AJ smiled.
“You’re right, I almost forgot about that. Which reminds me, you eat some of the cookies, I’ll get the milk.” AJ hurried back to the kitchen, leaving off the cans and going to the closet in his room. He got the one bag out and found a package that he didn’t recognize. It must have been from Win. He stopped and looked at the tag, reading, “To Latecia, From Winniefredie”.
He took the package out with the others to be put under the tree. Nick found the rest and they piled the packages around the base of the tree, until it looked like it was sitting on the presents itself.
“Thanks man, I owe you one,” AJ said clapping Nick on the shoulder.
“No thanks needed, I took the cookies,” crumbs fell out of his mouth as he spoke and AJ chuckled.
“Get out of here,” AJ laughed.
“Merry Christmas man,” Nick said, putting out a hand. They did a handshake then a hug before leaving.
“Merry Christmas to you too man.” Nick nodded and left the room.

AJ paced around the room several times before he even thought about calling again. He wasn’t surprised when her voicemail picked up. He would admit that he was now worried. He’d expected her to at least call him by now. Something wasn’t right. She wasn’t acting like herself.
He picked up the phone again and dialed her room. No answer. He called the desk and asked them to connect him to Win’s room.
“We’re sorry sir, but Winifred Caldon checked out two hours ago.” The desk clerk replied.
“Checked out! What do you mean checked out? Where did she go?” AJ jumped up from the bed and ran a hand through his hair.
“Sir, I’m not sure, but she did leave a note for, a, AJ, McLean.”
“A note?” AJ clung desperately to this piece of knowledge.
“We’ll bring it up right away sir.”
“Thank you.” AJ hung up the phone and quickly dialed Nick and Jen’s room.
“What did I forget?” Nick asked sleepily.
“She left.” AJ said simply.
“Who left?”
“Win! She left, checked out and everything!”
“All right man, calm down, I’ll be right over.” AJ hung up again and heard a knock on the door. He launched at the door and was presented with the note. He tore into it as he stood in the door way.
AJ,
I’m sorry, but I have to know, I love you.
-Win
AJ was still standing in the doorway, holding the note when Nick and Brian arrived.

Chapter 25
December 24th, 2005

Win sat in the airport, her legs crossed, jouncing nervously as she looked up at the clock again. Her plane was running two hours late and they had just delayed the first boarding for another thirty minutes. She wanted to be in the air before midnight. Wanted to be the air before Christmas hit. She didn’t know why, but she just wanted to be out of there. Out of the proximity of AJ, out of his reach.
She wanted to fall headfirst back into the abyss for morbid reasons. She’d never allowed herself to remember that she’d been abandoned, or raped, or anything taken away from her. She never allowed herself to think about them, her parents, real, fake, surrogate, fantasy or otherwise. She wanted to be that little child again and learn about what her parents were like and what they did and said. The way her mother wore her hair. The books her father read for pleasure and those he considered research. The color of her little brother and sisters’ eyes. Whether they liked animals, had pierced ears, if knew they had an older sister.
She looked up at the clock again, she’d be boarding soon, hopefully. She looked down in her lap at the images of the people she had printed out. These were her parents. She knew that much, but she wanted so much more. At what point would it be enough? She didn’t know, but she wanted to try and find out.

“When did she leave?” Nick asked.
“I don’t know, um, the guy at the desk said she left two hours ago,” AJ said as he ran his hands through his hair for the sixth time since he read the note. He was sitting at the table across from Nick who was looking over the note.
“This is all she left then. I would guess she went to the airport, where else was she gonna go?” Nick asked, setting the paper down on the table.
“I don’t know, I didn’t think she’d really leave,” AJ shook his head and rubbed a hand over his eyes.
“People do things they normally wouldn’t do in the face of shock. She’s not acting herself.” Nick replied softly, not knowing what else to say.
“You think she’s doing this because she wants to, or because she feels she has to?” AJ looked over at Nick.
“I couldn’t tell you that. I think she’s confused, don’t you think you’d be confused?” AJ looked back at the floor again.
“So what am I supposed to do?”
“You could go to bed, get up in the morning, celebrate Christmas and wait for her to call you,” Nick replied.
“Or?” AJ asked, perking up, sitting up in his chair.
“Go to the airport, track her down and bring her back.” AJ smiled and jumped up.
“Come on, you call Howie, I’ll find out all the flights that were leaving tonight for the US,” AJ grabbed his phone again and started making calls.
Before long the entire tour was alerted to Win’s take off. Daemon was especially concerned because he cared about Win as much as the guys and he didn’t want to lose such a great person to work with. Aside from that, she was on contract with Clive Davis and he was brutal when you broke contract. Daemon did not want to see her sued to within an inch of her life.
AJ’s room looked like a veritable 911 center with everyone milling around on phones calling taxis, bus stations, trains and airports to find Win. Howie and Kevin hooked up their lap tops and looked for flight times. AJ paced, too nervous to do anything else.
“Do you think that there is any possibility that she’s still here?” AJ asked Brian who was carrying a sleeping Winnie around in his arms.
“It’s been snowing non stop for like three days, it’s a blizzard out there now, I doubt that anyone is getting out of here tonight.” Brian replied, patting the baby’s back.
“I knew I shouldn’t have left her alone, I knew I shouldn’t have.”
“It’s not your fault AJ, she’s going through a lot, and you were there for her. You couldn’t do much else.”
“Still, I wish I’d been able to do something else.”
“What are you going to do when you find her?”
“I don’t know.”
“I got it! Win booked a flight this afternoon on United Airways, flight 407, Paris to Chicago, leaving at 9:06, gate 35. It’s been delayed and estimated to leave at 11:47 because of the snow.” Howie called over the crowd.
“You found it, really?” AJ perked up.
“It’s the only flight at the closest airport that’s leaving for the US tonight. I also had Nick call up and confirm Win’s ticket, to make sure I had it, and it was right. You better hurry, you only have about thirty minutes to catch her.” Howie replied.
“Then I’m going,” AJ grabbed his coat and was out the door before anyone could tell him any different.

Chapter 26
December 24th, 2005

AJ couldn’t get to the airport fast enough. He egged his driver to go faster but the roads were a mess from the weather and he didn’t want to cause an accident. AJ tapped his knees anxiously with his fingers hoping that he wasn’t too late.
While they were waiting at a traffic light, he pulled out of his jacket pocket, the picture he kept of him and Win. It had been taken not too long after they had finally admitted they were together. She looked so happy with him. He hoped that he was right, that he knew she still loved him.
“Monsieur, we are here,” AJ looked up and saw they were parked in front of the airport. Hurriedly he stuffed the photo back in his pocket, paid the cab driver and bolted into the airport lobby.
He got through security quickly, because he had only his wallet and passport on him and was directed to the gate he was looking for.
He galloped down the terminal, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, finally 35. Each sign seemed like a ray of hope and a death sentence at the same time. Each one could be bringing him closer to Win or closer to the absence of her.
He stopped under the sign for gate 35 and closed his eyes before turning around to look for Win. When he turned, he scanned the seating area, he didn’t see her. Then, out of the corner of his eye, he recognized her. She was looking at her watch, waiting impatiently.
He swooped over to her and she jumped when she saw him.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, standing up to look at him. She was frightened by his sudden appearance, this was what she had wanted to avoid.
“You can’t go, not like this. You can’t.” He shook his head and tried to catch his breath.
“How do you know that?” she evaded his eyes, she didn’t want to look at him.
“Because I’m afraid, that if you get on that plane, you’ll never come back, and I’ll lose you forever,” he tried to get her to look at him but she wouldn’t.
“I need to know. I can’t help it, I need to. You had to know with your father, right, I need to know with my parents too, my family.” He took hold of her arms and made her look at him.
“They are not your parents, not your real ones anyway. They are not your family. Elizabeth was your family, the girls you lived with, they were your family. The guys, the crew, Latecia, Winnie, me, we are your family.”
“How is that possible?” she asked, trying not to let herself sound so unsure.
“Because we all love and care about you, and need you. They don’t need you. We do. I do. I need you Win, I love you, I need you, and I want you to stay here, with me, your family.”
“But what about, I don’t know, what if I don’t ever ask those questions?” he took her face in his hands and looked her directly in the eyes.
“You have been asking them. But running to people who have no desire to love you is not going to fix you. Running from a good life and people that love you is not gonna solve that problem for you.”
“I am broken, into a thousand pieces, and maybe if I know, maybe that will help. I had my whole life, my whole history, it was an invention in my head, now, I have to reinvent myself, reinvent my entire life, reinvent my purpose for being here,” Win said with difficulty.
“Flight 407 Paris to Chicago is now boarding!” the intercom blared first in French, German and then English.
Win yanked away from him.
“I have to go.” She grabbed her back pack and rat cage, turning her back to AJ.
“Win, please don’t go.”
“I have to know,” she replied simply.
“Win, I’m begging you, please, I need you to stay here, with me, please,” AJ was begging now, knowing that if she did get on that plane she wouldn’t come back and if she did, she would never be the same, for better or worse. She walked away from him, steadily, sure and unsure all at the same time of what she was doing.
He walked after her a few paces and called out to her.
“I’ve been the coward Win,” she was at the counter waiting for the stewardess to take her ticket. She didn’t turn to look at him.
“I pushed you away and I let all that happen. I know I did. Don’t do what I did, please, don’t,” he spoke to her back, taking a step every time he dared. He was waiting for her to bolt and trying not to scare her away.
“I was too stupid to see what I had right in front of me. And Win, if it’s crazy, I don’t care, and I have to say it to you before I chicken out again,” the stewardess handed her back the ticket and she shifted her shoulder strap before walking towards the terminal entrance.
“Win, marry me!” he shouted after her. She stopped dead in her tracks, halting so suddenly that AJ even stopped.
“What?” she turned around and looked at him, surprised, confused, scared, all at once.
“Yeah, marry me! Tonight, on Christmas, in Paris. You and me,” AJ threw his arms up and laughed a bit, trying to hold everything together.
“You wanted me to find out what we’re supposed to do, that crazy, impulsive, rash, irresponsible but wonderful thing, and this is it. Win, marry me!” He shouted it again, his smile lopsided and waiting for her.
Win looked like for a moment things could go either way. She put down her heel as if to step backwards then leaned forward again on the ball of her foot. She closed her eyes and swallowed hard. When she opened her eyes again they had tears in them. She bit her lip and looked up at AJ, then, she nodded.
“You will? You will? You mean it?” AJ nearly collapsed in shock, falling backwards slightly and laughing.
“YES! AJ, I’ll marry you,” she laughed and tears fell out of her eyes.
“SHE SAID YES!” AJ jumped and whooped before running to Win and scooping her up in his arms.
“Don’t do that to me again, don’t ever do that, please, Win, damn, I just love you.” He held her and laughed, smiled, crushed her soul into his own in his embrace. Win picked up her watch and looked at the time, 12:01 on the dot. She kissed AJ and smiled as she pressed her lips to his. She loved this man, and for now, that was all she was going to worry about.

Chapter 27
December 25th, 2005

At the hotel everyone sat and waited. There was nothing left to do but wait. AJ had left his phone behind so no one would know what was happening, whether or not he had found her or been able to convince her to stay. They were all worried. Worried about Win and what she’d been through, but also about AJ, and how bad he’d be if she left.
Howie felt especially guilty for having said the things he’d said about Win. He should have known that Win wasn’t that kind of person. She went out of her way to make sure people didn’t get hurt. She would never deliberately hurt anyone. This running away was a prime example. She was hurt, she was confused and definitely not thinking clearly. He wished he’d been a little more supportive of AJ and Win when he found out they were back together.
Howie knew from the talks he’d had with AJ that he wanted to propose, had wanted to ever since he came back from introducing Win to his mother and family. He’d gone so far as even looking at rings, but always came to the same conclusion, he wasn’t sure Win would say yes. AJ usually didn’t ask questions unless he knew what the answer was in the first place.
But there was nothing left to do but wait.
There was a knock at the door and Kevin leapt anxiously to open it, but it wasn’t AJ and Win, rather it was Denise.
“What are you doing here?” Kevin exclaimed, giving the woman a hug.
“I came to surprise my son on Christmas, besides I wanted to spend Christmas with my granddaughter,” Denise explained, passing out hugs.
“Why the large gathering, at this time in the morning, where’s Alex?” Denise asked finally.
“I’m surprised you didn’t run into him at the airport, that’s where he is now,” Brian replied.
“Why is he at the airport?” Denise asked, wide-eyed. Howie and Kevin took the time to explain the whole story.
“So she just packed up, and took off?” Denise asked.
“She did, though I don’t think anyone can blame her,” Nick chimed in.
“No, no, of course not, I just hope AJ has gotten to her in time.”

Not too far away, Win and AJ were standing on the balcony of the Eiffel Tower once more, looking out on the and the lights on Christmas. They stood their, gazing out at the city and taking in the atmosphere.
“Perhaps we should get along with the ceremony?” the old man said, clearing his throat.
“Don’t rush them dear,” his wife scolded. He smiled and nodded.
“No, we’re ready,” Win replied.
“Are you sure?” AJ asked, holding both of her hands in his. She didn’t falter for a second in nodding her head.
“I’m very sure.” They turned to the Justice of the Peace and he opened his book to read the traditional vows. AJ and Win looked at one another as they repeated the words that promised them to love, cherish, care, in sickness, health, wealth, poor, for as long as they lived.
“Do you have rings?” he asked.
“Rings? Oh, yes, this,” AJ said, pulling the serenity ring off of his hand.
“And you?” he asked Win. She thought a moment and took off the ring on the chain she wore around her neck.
“It was the ring that Elizabeth gave me, it was her husband’s, my father’s ring.” She smiled at AJ as she slid the ring into place on his finger and he in turn replaced the ring on her finger.
“By the power invested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss your bride.” And AJ did, for a long time. When they finally parted they were alone on the balcony and they were both glowing.
“Are you glad that we got married?” AJ asked her, holding her close.
“Very, very, very happy. AJ, you are my angel, you got those wings baby, I’m telling you, you save me, every time.” He grinned at her.
“Does this change everything?”
“Like what?” she asked.
“Do you still have to reinvent yourself?”
“I think I already have. I’m a married woman, and there’s nothing about that I’d change,” she smiled at him.
“Good, I love you Beautiful, I truly do.”
“I love you too, my angel boy.”
“You think we ought to go back and tell everyone we got married?”
“I think at some point we’ll have to,” Win chuckled.
“This should be one great gift to everyone.”
“Yeah, it should.”
They took their time going back to the hotel, walking in the snow and enjoying Christmas and the fact that they were married. Once they were back inside and standing in front of the door, they waited.
“Are your ready for this?” Win asked.
“I don’t know, are you?” AJ turned to her with a grin a mile wide.
“I think you are,” she laughed quietly.
“Then, let’s go for it,” he kissed her and went to knock on the door.
“Wait a minute!” Win hissed.
“What?”
“You remember the other day, when you were wondering whether I had something to tell you?” Win asked.
“Yeah, what about it?” AJ asked, one eyebrow raised in suspicion.
“You remember what I said, when you asked me?”
“You said something like, ‘Yeah AJ, I’m pregnant, yup,’ so? What about it?”
“I wasn’t being sarcastic.”

THE END

OR

MAYBE NOT…