The Art of Calling by mersey
Summary: The boys are on tour with the new album and Nick did something to make sure Kevin isn't left behind.
Categories: Fanfiction > Backstreet Boys Characters: None
Genres: Drama
Warnings: None
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: 2567 Read: 1040 Published: 06/27/07 Updated: 06/27/07

1. The Art of Calling by mersey

The Art of Calling by mersey
Author's Notes:
Just another short one because lord forbid mersey starts a multi chaptered fic she'll never finish! lol...i honestly dont know why there's a 'b' in between the paragraphs though, lol...it should be an asterix or something instead, lol

The Art of Calling

Your cousin is impossible. Just thought you should know that. So anyway, I can’t remember if we ever took time out to experience Perth when we were there last time but we took this boat ride like we did back in like 2000 or something, for the Black and Blue tour? And uh, I thought it’d be great to go fishing and then I realised we did that for my birthday when we were here for Never Gone, didn’t we? That was a fun day. Aaron told me there’s something to be said about spending your twenty-sixth birthday going fishing, the little fucker, but I loved it, really did. So Brian dared me to put Nair on AJ’s shampoo and I told him we’re on a friggin tour, I’m not about to mess up AJ’s hair and you know what your cousin said? He said AJ barely has any to begin with! He’s impossible, your cousin. I wish…yeah well, thought I’d leave you a message, let you know we’re doing okay here and that…so, I wasn’t expecting you to answer your phone or anything, I know it’s kind of late there but I’m also using AJ’s cellphone to make this call so…yeah, I’m down to petty misdemeanour acts Kevin, something needs to be done, maybe I should really pull that dare. God your cousin is impossible! I think I…I think I should take a nap, or annoy Howie, maybe that might stop me from doing the unthinkable. So uh, bye!

b

Did you know that Llama spits, Kev? I bet you do. You know everything right? You always know random shit like that, I don’t know how you do it, I mean, sure you read the papers a lot but I don’t think I’ve ever seen you with a copy of 1001 random facts for idiots. I guess you need to be an idiot to be reading one and you’re far from being one so I guess that’s why. Still…you know who doesn’t know that Llama spits? AJ. I bet even you haven’t pick up a book on Peru, that’s one book you might want to pick when you’re at a bookstore someday. Do you get to do that now? Go to random bookstores and stuff? I mean, I imagine you’re extra free now that you’re not touring with us. I bet you don’t even have to read about Peru if you’re still with us though because you’d be in Peru and getting yourself spat in the face by a friggin’ Llama. They look like donkeys or a really fugly pony, until they spit on you and you realise it’s a Llama. Bet you’ve never seen one in real life huh? You could you know, see one in real life, if you hadn’t…so anyway, I can’t believe we made it to Peru, like finally! Really cool place, you’d love it here, all nature and stuff. I was thinking of taking a hike at this one famous natural forest thing…I can’t remember what the name is now, but I was reading the brochures they have up in our rooms but none of the guys buy it and I really don’t want to do it alone, with my luck I’d probably get myself lost or something. That’d be funny though right? Backstreet Boy lost in a Peruvian jungle. Anyway, thought I’d call ya, leave another message…what time is it there anyway? You know, if I just forget where I am right now, it’s like I’m still back home. Places kind of blend after a while, sky is still blue everywhere we go. Kinda make me feel like we’re never really far after all. So, look up Peru, it’d be a great place for a vacation, just don’t go near the Llamas unless you know what you’re doing. I got a video by the way, AJ slobbered in Llama spit, heh…good for blackmail. So…hope things are well with you and the little family. Send my love to Kristin and the little one kay.

b

You know what I hate right now? Huge friggin’ rain. I mean, it’s not even storming; it’s just…raining, hard. It really sucks cause you can’t see a friggin star in the sky and the moon’s nowhere in sight. It’s just dark and everything out there looks like it’s been slashed with white things that keep falling. Such a waste of a good Friday night when you actually have a day off and you’re in Sweden. I didn’t even know it rains in Sweden man, I figured it’d just snow. We’re doing fine by the way, AJ got himself a cold but he’s toughin’ it out. I bet it’s sunny there in LA.

b

My balls hurt something bad. Camels are so overrated man. They keep saying we have to try it out. You gotta do this man, once in your life, ride a fuckin’ camel! I’m always up for an adventure right? What was it you always say? Play hard, live life? Yeah, sounds like something you’d say. So we did it. All four of us. Dude, I’d take riding a horse any day man. Those humps…I swear I was this close to being impotent, dawg. Not like it’s a bad thing all things considered, I mean, the last thing you want is another Carter running around in this world…but dude, I’d like that to be my decision, not impaired by a friggin camel ya know? We’re in Egypt by the way. Another place we thought we’d never get to go. They love us here Kev, every press junket we went to they keep asking about how it feels to be down to four. I keep saying now we have 2 pairs, no one gets left behind. But that’s not the case at all…I wish you were here though, you’d love the pyramids. And the mummies man! I got to see one and it’s just surreal. Howie said it reminds him of our Everybody video. So technically, I got to see my own cousin or some shit like that. No, no, not cousin, great great great grand cousin, the mummy. When I die, though, I want to be buried, don’t let no one mummified me kay? I think a lifetime of being watched is enough, I want to be six feet under and asleep, no one scrutinising the way I’m rotting or preserving. Do you even use this number anymore?

b

You know, if Coke and Pepsi battle it out, I bet Coke would win. I prefer Coke anyway. Howie said he’d always thought I’d prefer Pepsi cause it’s sweeter. But Coke has more gas, it’s stronger you know? It’s good for burping really, really loud. Not like I need Coke to burp really loud, but man, have you tried it? This gassy feeling in your stomach just circling in there until it reached your oesophagus, yeah I do know that word, and then it just…comes out of you…I feel liberated or something. You know what sucks though? When some of the gas escapes through your nose…man, that hurts, although it’s funny cause you can smell the gas as it goes out of your nose, it smells like…well, Coke. Brian said the ingredients and the gas in Coke is so strong that it can corrode a piece of metal. Then he said imagine that kind of stuff swishing in my intestines. Your cousin is such a killer joy Kev. Then Howie’s still unhappy that I said I prefer Coke to Pepsi so AJ came out with this brilliant idea to blindfold me and get me to drink both of them and then tell them which one I prefer more. I chose Coke, obviously, and that for some reason annoyed Howie even more. I think we should write to Pepsi and tell them we have the best candidate for their new spokeperson, what d’ya think? Tour’s doing fine, I’m sure you read about them on LD or some whacked place like that. Just thought you’d prefer hearing it straight from the horse’s mouth. Not that I’m a horse or anything. Although I’m hung like one. Heh, I so know you’re cringing right now, my mission is complete!

b

We’re in Brunei right now. It’s my birthday and I’m sick. Howie said I should consider sitting tonight’s concert out. I don’t think I can though. I mean, can you imagine? Three Backstreet Boys? It’s just odd. That’s the thing with being a four piece group though…one went missing and people notice and find it odd. It’s so unbalanced I guess. But the Hansons did it, so I don’t know. Anyway, it’s our first time here, I don’t think the fans will be too happy if they found out they’re paying to see 3 instead of 4 Backstreet Boys. Besides, the harmony would be way off. The guys have left for some press stuff and I’m bored as hell. I can’t believe I’m 28, I feel so old, it’s wrong. Maybe it’s the fever talking. How’s life treating you? Call me sometime man, or one of the guys…our phones still work in these parts of the world, just in case you don’t know that.

b

Howie fell off the stage tonight. We’re in Japan and you know how the fans here are like, really, really polite? So they didn’t even dare to go forward and help Howie, they just have this exact expression on their faces, like this big O mouth and plate sized wide eyes with their hands clutching their hearts, it’s so funny. I forgot what we were singing about but we just stopped what we were doing and started yelling if he’s all right. Marcus got to him and would you believe it there isn’t a scratch on that man! I mean, I swear if that had been me, I’d come out with a broken neck or something. Then Brian started singing ‘Howie’s back, all right!’ and we cracked up so bad, we had to stop the show for like 30 minutes cause we can’t friggin’ sing anything! See kev? I think if you were here still, you’d be on our ass so fast man. So yeah, feel free to remind Howie about his fall whenever you call him kay?

b

I see you updated your myspace. I think I should start leaving you messages there, maybe you’d reply back to me. Nice pic by the way…you should try using one of those picture trail thingy man…I had a blast doing those. It’s not that difficult to use, even an old man like you can do it. Really. Call you again some time, busy day today. Bye.

b

Happy Birthday you old fart! Hehehe…I wish we could celebrate it together, I don’t know…go out for lunch or something. I’m sure you have something planned with Kristin and the precious one though, so have fun all right! We’re in London right now so I got you a little something from here. You know what’s really crazy in the UK man? Football. We keep seeing football related stuff here so Brian thought it’d be awesome to buy you something football related even though you hardly play that sport. Did I mention we tried it out this morning? I keep wanting to use my hands it’s crazy. Marcus keep giving me the red card although I was pretty sure that meant I got kicked out of the game, which I didn’t. Anyway, who cares about the rules right? I keep yelling ‘offside’ whenever Brian tried to score. We ended up playing rugby for some reason. So anyway, the people there keep saying we should buy a Manchester United shirt but AJ said Arsenal sounds ‘manly’ but Howie said Arsenal reminds him of weapons and he’s sure you’re a peace loving guy and said we should go for Chelsea cause it’s Blue and you like Blue and the Clinton’s daughter is Chelsea, what it has to do with buying you a present, I don’t know, Brian pointed that out. My personal favourite is Liverpool because dude, that’s one whacked out name for a team. I mean, liver and pool? And then of course Howie said The Beatles came from Liverpool and the light bulbs came out and we got our team. Although you’d probably like to know that we ended up buying you the Gold edition of The Beatles CD collection. I don’t know why it’s called Gold though. I sure talk a lot huh? To a machine no less. I really think I need help Kev.

b

My head is stuck on this one song and I can’t get it out. It’s a good song though so I guess it’s okay. Have you heard it? It’s by this band called The Fray, the song is How To Save A Life. I really like it. I wonder if they’re on tour right now? I’d so catch one of their shows. Hey maybe we can go catch it together some time. We have one more stop and then it’s back home to the land of the free. I’ll call you when I get back I guess.

b

Hey uh Kev…so I just got back home like an hour ago I think. I haven’t even had time to shower, I smell kind of funny. Jet lagged man, nothing fun about that either. So yeah, I spent a good half hour just going through my voicemail. Dude, you left messages on my home voicemail instead of my cellphone! I thought you’d forgotten all about me dawg. I think someone needs to get hook up on some good old ginko. Call Howard, Kev. Uh…so yeah, I’m home, and I still get your voicemail, wassup with that man? Are you ever free to answer your phone? I thought the whole thing about not being a Backstreet Boy is that you’d be free to do other stuff, which includes answering your phone when it rings. Unbelievable Kevin. Call me kay? We should go fishing or something. Sides, I still have your birthday present with me. I don’t know why they left the present with me though, I guess they think I’d be responsible enough to do one thing right. So we should really meet, before I accidentally use your present as a coaster or something stupid like that. Call me okay?

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