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Chapter Twenty One – June 9

A change came over Nick in the few days since the club incident. He wasn’t freaking out like he had been, but his face was set and smiles were few and far between. He seemed constantly on alert. When he held Brooke he looked at her like he wished he could enclose her in a bubble and tuck her safely away. The look on his face when I grabbed my keys in the middle of the afternoon was one of sheer panic.

“Where are you going?”

“We need groceries.”

“So?”

“So, I have to go to the store!”

Nick padded past me and opened the refrigerator.

“I think we have plenty of food.”

“We have a wilted head of lettuce, a half full carton of orange juice, and some taco cheese.”

“So?”

“I need a new head of lettuce. And we need diapers!”

Nick sighed. Under usual circumstances he hated going to the grocery store, but the thought of going now was probably like finger nails on a chalkboard to him. I know he would have ordered in all of our meals before going to the store, but he couldn’t argue with the need for diapers. He sighed again.

“If you have to go, then we’ll all go.”

“Nick…”

“No, I’ll get Brooklyn. You write out a list.”

Nick took the stairs two at a time; I took out a notepad. My stomach growled miserably. I was sick of lettuce and grapefruit juice. After the wedding I never wanted to see those two foods ever again.

After checking the cereal supply (low) and the milk supply (nonexistent) I scribbled out a few more necessities. Nick came back down, blowing raspberries on Brooke’s stomach as he descended.

“All good?” he asked. I held up the notepad and nodded.

“Yup. Let’s roll.”

It was another boiling hot day. The minute we stepped outside my t-shirt clung to my chest like it had been vacuum sealed to my skin. Brooke began to cry as Nick strapped her into the car seat.

“Need help?” I asked, leaning over him.

“Nope, just get in the car,” he said. He glanced over his shoulder, looking around the area.

The minute Nick climbed into the car, he hit the door lock. Brooke continued to fuss in the backseat as he eased into traffic.

I had picked the wrong time to go to the grocery store. Traffic was at an all time high. Just minutes away from the store we were stuck in a standstill. Nick cranked the air conditioner up to full blast but it did nothing to help relieve the humidity.

“What the hell is going on?” he asked, craning his neck to see what the holdup might be.

Ten minutes later we still hadn’t moved. Nick was sighed and tapping the wheel and he was looking around so much that I was sure he was going to pull a neck muscle. The tension was too much for me to take.

Stuck in traffic / we are never going to get to the grocery store / cause we are stuck in traffic / stuck in trafffficcccc /

Nick looked at me in confusion for a moment then smiled. He finished off the song.

We are living in helllllll / cause we are stuck in trafficcccccc

We laughed.

Traffic began to ease up about fifteen minutes later. Nick squeezed us into a tight parking spot and got out. I had never seen the man move so fast; Brooklyn was in his arms before I even got out of the passenger side.

I felt like I was a contestant in Supermarket Sweep. Nick hustled down the aisles, occasionally tossing something into the cart. When we got to the baby aisle, Nick threw so many packages of Pampers in the cart that Brooklyn would probably outgrow the size before she used them all.

“Nick, what are you doing?” I asked patiently. He paused with another package in his hand.

“Stocking up.”

“Don’t.”

“Why?”

“Because this is stupid. I’m sick of being scared. Ever since we met with that voodoo lady I’ve been the one freaking out. Now that I’m seeing you freak out I realize how stupid this is.”

I was getting myself worked up in the middle of the grocery store. My hands were waving a mile an hour as Nick just looked at me dumbfounded. My hair stuck to my forehead; as warm as it was in the store I highly doubted the frozen foods were still frozen.

“Liv…” Nick began to say but I cut him off.

“No. We’re going to finish grocery shopping, unpack, and then go do something normal people would do. Like go to the park.”

“No normal person would go to the park on a day like this.”

I didn’t respond, instead I turned around and began to march down the aisle. I heard the wheels of our squeaky cart following behind me at a distance.

With every step I took the temperature seemed to rise. The heat mixed with the smell coming from the deli made my stomach flip flop. As I rounded the corner toward the water and soda aisle, the whole store seemed to spin.

The last thing I remember was grabbing onto a shelf before the world went black.

-------------------------------------------------

When I came around I was pretty sure I had died. The room where I was lying was so cold that I was positive that I had been taken to the morgue. I was going to be buried alive!

“She’s coming around,” I heard someone say. I was hoping it was the mortician before they embalmed me. I was kind of fond of my organs.

“Liv, are you okay?”

Nick’s face swam into my line of vision. I looked around in confusion. I was in the manager’s office of the grocery store.

“What happened?”

“You fainted.”

I began to sit up.

“Slow,” Nick commanded. Brooklyn’s head was resting on Nick’s shoulder. She yawned.

I slowed my movements until I was in a complete sitting position. The spinning had disappeared; I looked around and sighed. A woman who I assumed was the grocery manager handed me a cup of water. I took a sip; the liquid hit my stomach like a lead weight.

“Are you okay to stand?” Nick asked. I nodded. I stood up and tested my legs. They didn’t feel like Jell-O so I figured I was good to go.

Nick pulled up to the front of the store and got me and Brooklyn into the car. He disappeared into the store and came out a moment later with our cart of groceries. I sat slumped in the front seat feeling humiliated. After a few minutes Nick opened his door and got in. A blast of hot air filled the car. He pulled back into traffic. We were halfway home when he turned into McDonald’s.

“What do you want?” he asked. I shook my head.

“I’m not hungry.”

The tick in his jaw was back. “We’re not playing this game. I told that manager the heat must have made you light-headed but I know damn well it’s because all you have in your stomach is rabbit food and grapefruit juice. Now what do you want?”

I blinked back tears. Nick wouldn’t meet my eyes; I knew it was because he fell apart when I started crying. He inched up to the window.

“Can I take your order?”

“I’ll have a number one and a diet Coke.” Nick looked at me.

I sighed. “A cheeseburger.”

“And a cheeseburger, small fry, and diet Coke.”

He pulled up closer to the pay window. I folded my arms.

“Our groceries are going to melt.”

“We didn’t get any meltables.”

“Our milk is going to spoil.”

He didn’t answer. Nick pulled up and paid and grabbed the greasy bag of food. He handed it to me and continued our drive home.

When we pulled up to the house, Nick got Brooklyn out and carried her upstairs. I opened the back of the car and began to unload groceries. By the time I made the first trip in, Nick had walked out and returned with the bag of food. He set it down on the island.

“I’ll finish getting the groceries. You sit down and eat”

I slid up onto the barstool and sighed. I took a big sip of the Diet Coke; a rush of fizz flowed through my veins. It tasted amazing.

It took two more trips for Nick to get the groceries in and I had yet to open my burger. He quickly put away the cold food and slid up on the stool across from me.

“Eat.”

He opened his Big Mac and took a big bite. With slow deliberation I unwrapped my cheeseburger. I inhaled the scent greedily.

If the Diet Coke was amazing, the cheeseburger was heaven. I closed my eyes as the grease poured through my body. I sadly thought of my wedding dress. I took another bite.

The burger had won.

And I was almost glad it had.