Chapter 27
After a somewhat reluctant start by Kim, she soon found the strength to push past her initial fears. Ash was great and seemed to understand just by looking at her what he needed to do so he kept her working close with himself.
The new team were amazing there was even another female member of the team who Kim instantly found a friend. The new crew made sure Kim and Ash felt right at home. They were hard workers, eager to get their jobs done and to such a high standard, Kim and Ash would sometimes feel like they were slacking off.
As always Ash had suggested and early set up so he could iron out any creases in the work or team, but to his surprise it took half the time he expected so everyone got to hang out and get to know each other better. The night before the boys were due to arrive the crew took Kim and Ash out for dinner and then to a karaoke bar to celebrate the start of the tour, it was the most fun Kim had, had in ages she couldn’t remember the last time she laughed so hard.
Kim awoke early the next morning as Ash had set out a full day of last minute checks before the first sound check started. She sat on the edge of her bunk, as the reality that she would soon be seeing Nick again began to sink in, a mix of emotions swarmed around her muddled head. It was not long before nerves soon got the better of her and she began to cry, she had tried so hard to push Nick to the back of her mind and accept the hand she had been dealt, but it was no use she was clearly not over him.
This realisation could not have come at a worse time, Nick could arrive at any time and she did not feel ready for that first encounter.
There was a loud knock at the door; Ash’s voice crept through it.
“Are you ready Kim?”
Wiping her face with the back of her hand, she took a deep breath.
“Yeah just give me 5 minutes k.”
“Yeah no probs I’ll go make us a coffee.”
Kim stood up and checked her reflection in the mirror; her eyes were red and puffy.
“Ergh, I need to fix up, I can’t walk around the place looking like this.” She quietly spoke to her reflection.
10 minutes later, she emerged from the sleeping area looking rather radiant in tight blue jeans and a fitted white T- shirt, she had tied her hair back in a messy bun, allowing stray strands of curls to fall loose and her makeup was subtle but brought out the deepness of her eyes. Ash handed her a coffee trying hard to hide the smile that had formed on his face.
“Cigarette?” He asked.
“Defiantly.” Kim beamed as she headed out of the bus with Ash closely following behind her like a little puppy.
It was pretty cold outside; Kim danced around for warmth as she tried to light her cigarette. Across the way, some of the crew had started a little game of football. Kim sat down on the bottom step of the bus to watch them hilariously trying to outdo each other with football tricks.
Ash hovered around Kim as he tried to find a good starting sentence in his head.
“What’s up lad?” Kim raised an eyebrow as she looked up to him.
“Huh?” Ash snapped out of his thoughts.
“You’re hovering around me like a crazy Nat, so what’s up?”
“It’s just, well I’m just a bit worried about you, that’s all.” Ash half smiled as he waited for Kim’s backlash.
“You’re worried? Why? Have a done something wrong? Am I not working hard enough?” Kim looked at Ash a little worried herself now.
Ash began to laugh. “No you nana, your work is fine, in fact your one of the best employee’s I’ve had. It’s just I was wondering if you have given any thought on what your gunna do or say when you see Nick?”
Kim shrugged her shoulders. “I dunno Ash, I guess I just stay outta his way and carry on with my job. I’m not here for Nick anyway; I’m here for a job I love to do and for you. Besides if I wasn’t good enough to talk to over the past few months when I needed him the most I guess I’m still not good enough now. So I’m afraid Nick Carter has missed this bus.”
“Do you think he got your message about what happened with Andy?” Ash instantly regretted asking the question.
Again, Kim shrugged as she inhaled deeply. “I dunno, I kinda hope he didn’t to be honest cuz if he did and still never responded then that makes him even more of a jerk than he already is.”
Ash gently rubbed the top of her head. “You’re a funny little thing.” He joked.
“Kim, if today or the next few days do get a little too much for you then please tell me and don’t hide from it. You can take some time off if you need to, I’ll cover for you.”
“Thanks Ash, I’m glad your with me and don’t worry OK, Nicks not my life so I won’t be wasting my time not living it just because of him.”
Kim stood up and stamped out what little was left of her cigarette.
“C’mon then lad we best get crackin, else we’ll be put to shame again by all these hard workers.”
Kim placed their cups inside the bus and grabbed her tool kit before heading over to the main arena with Ash for their morning briefing.
Ash’s briefing was pretty quick and straight forward he handed out everyone’s itineraries for the week and then sent them off to begin their day.
“Kim I just gotta make a few calls and get back to some emails, will you be ok to just over see till I get back? I won’t be long about an hour maybe.” Ash handed Kim a walkie-talkie.
Hesitantly Kim took the radio and nodded to Ash.
“If you need me radio through, ok.” Ash smiled, then headed back towards his make shift office on the bus.
Kim looked around the quiet arena she walked towards the stage, her eyes glued to the centre of it as flashbacks of that night with Andy vividly played out. She turned her head to look away as the pain became too much.
“You OK Kim?” A voice from behind startled her, she turned to see one of the crew members standing behind her.
“Yeah I’m fine thanks, just zoned out there for a sec.
You OK do you need anything?” Kim smiled back.
“I ran out of duct tape do you have any on you?” The man unconvincingly smiled back.
Kim fumbled around her tool belt untill she found a tiny roll of black tape.
“It’s all I’ve got on me at the minute but use this and I’ll run out to the truck and grab you some more ok”
“Thank you very much Kim.” The man gratefully smiled as he turned to head back to his station.
Kim took a last painful look at the stage, a faded memory of Nick danced around on it. Her eyes fell to the floor before she headed out of the arena to restock her tool belt.
Outside Kim lit another cigarette before mooching around in some boxes for fresh tape and screws and anything else she deemed fit to carry.
Making her way back across the huge car park, Kim saw the side gates begin to open then two enormous, jet-black minivans came speeding through.
Jogging over to a part of the building, which protruded out slightly Kim, hid behind it.
She knew exactly who was in the vans and her heart began to beat a million times per minute. Peeping around the corner, she saw Q jump out of the first van and head around to the side door to open it, as soon as it slid open Brian jumped out. Baylee and Leighanne quickly followed and Kim smiled to herself as she watched an over excited Baylee run rings around Brian.
Next AJ emerged with his trademark hat and sunglasses looking ever much the rock star. Kim laughed again; he was only person she knew that would still wear sunglasses in the freezing cold middle of winter and get away with it. AJ grabbed a bag out of the car threw it over his shoulder before lighting a cigarette, a very happy looking Rochelle then left the car to brave the cold and huddled up to AJ as they took in their new surroundings.
Leigh was the first person out of the second van holding on tightly to a sleeping baby James, Howie quickly followed and loaded himself up with several different sized bags before joining up with the rest of the group who had congregated in the middle of the car park.
Kim took in a deep breath as she waited for the final missing piece to appear from the car. Then within the blink of an eye there he was, looking as tall and handsome as ever, Kim gasped lightly, all feelings of sadness and disappointment suddenly left her all she could now feel was how much she had actually missed him.
Nick turned and flashed that heart melting before ducking down slightly to speak to someone who was still in the van.
Kim snapped back to reality as she quickly scanned the group to see whom he could be talking to, but she could not work it out. Jenn and the rest of the team were now all standing talking to the rest of the group.
Her eyes quickly darted back to the van to see a pair of long leather black boots appear attached to an even longer pair of legs. A tall woman with long glossy black hair finally appeared, she was nearly as tall as Nick and although Kim was a fair distance away, she thought the lady looked extremely pretty.
I wonder who she is? Kim quietly said to herself, still looking on intensely.
A moment later Kim’s question was answered, she watched in horror as Nick threw his arm around the mystery woman and planted a kiss on the top of her head.
Kim’s mouth dropped open in shock, her whole body froze as the woman snuggled into Nick and slide her hand inside his coat. Kim looked on like it was a bad accident she should not be looking at but was unable to tear her stare away.
As it finally hit home what she was looking upon her heart sink deep into the pit of her stomach, she slid round to the hidden side of the wall trying her best not to throw up. Her hands quickly went up to her face as the tears began to escape.
How can he do this? She asked herself.
How can he just switch off from me like that then move straight onto someone new?
What did I do that was so bad he felt the need to treat me like this?
Why the fuck didn’t I listen to everyone who said it was a bad idea?
Kim continued to quietly question everything about herself and what she thought she had with Nick.
The pain in her chest was becoming immense as she struggled to breath; she threw her head back into the wall as the tears flowed more freely.
It had started to rain heavily now and she instantly became wet through, but she did not move, she could not feel it, all she was aware of was the painful pieces of her shattered heart digging into her fragile soul.
She slid down the wall sobbing into her hands as her body shook from the shock and the cold. Kim stayed there for a while, totally unable to function untill she felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her and pull her up, she looked through her misty eyes to see an outline of Ash, again he had come to her rescue.
He knew exactly why she was in the state she was in, he’d been over to greet Jenn and let her know how things had gone when he caught first sight of Nick and his new girlfriend and instantly gone to find Kim to try and prepare her for the shock, but he was obliviously to late.
Holding onto her as tightly as he could he lead her out of the rain and over to the shelter of their bus.
Chapter End Notes:
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