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Chapter Five – November 7

“Man, this should have been the day we made you eat a Viagra cupcake."

“Not funny, Nick. Not funny. That was the worst twelve hours of my life. You're just lucky Leighanne still lets me talk to you guys after that. She was not happy.”

Brian and I were sitting in the back of a convertible in sunny Palm Springs, CA for the Gay Pride Parade. Howie , AJ, and Kevin were squeezed in the car right behind us. Sam was walking between our cars, filming the whole thing. He was dressed as a Playboy bunny complete with tight Borat leotard and fluffy tail.

“I kind of feel like Wilbur from Charlotte’s Web,” I whispered to Brian. They had outfitted us with these humongous ribbons like the kind you would see at a fair for the fluffiest sheep or best hung horse.

“Oh c’mon. We made Sam’s day by agreeing to be grand marshals,” Brian said. He turned around and waved back at Howie and AJ.

I was really surprised that AJ had decided to join us for the parade. We had flown out of Tampa yesterday morning. Liv, Addy and Leigh had tagged along. Leighanne had gone back to Atlanta for another homeschool testing conference. Poor Baylee seemed to always be taking tests.

And then there was Rochelle. AJ was keeping pretty tight lipped, but he was stressed out. That made me worried. When AJ was stressed out he always did something stupid.

Anyhow, AJ wasn’t in a really good mood before we left this morning. Addy had found the whole gay pride parade thing interesting and was waiting at the end of the parade route. Liv and Leigh had announced they were going shopping; with James and Brooke in tow, they headed out to do some damage to Howie’s and my credit cards. Not that I minded. Liv was actually overly conscious of my money.

“Do Sam proud,” Liv had said before I had left. I laughed.

“I’ll show my pride, but I don’t know about the whole “Do Sam” thing though.”

Liv had kissed me hard and for a few minutes I had the sudden urge to just forget about the parade and show my very heterosexual lust by getting naked and sweaty and going all doggie style on her. That’s when Sam had walked by our open door in his bunny suit. It’s hard to keep a stiffy when you just saw a guy’s noodles spilling out of a banana hammock.

“So what do you guys think?” Sam said over the roar of the crowd. The people in the crowd were actually just as interesting as those on the parade floats.

“This rocks!” I yelled. Sam danced back to Howie and AJ. As Sam was talking to them, a woman dressed as a devil ran towards the car. Security was on her in a split second, but AJ stopped them. He leaned over and began talking to her as she jogged next to the car.

“Who’s that?” Brian asked.

The woman looked familiar. Long legs, long black hair…I snapped my fingers.

“Oh! That’s Andrea!”

“Who?”

“Andrea. One of our dancers from last year?”

Recognition came into Brian’s eyes. “Okay. I thought she looked familiar.”

I grinned. “Sorry. I forgot you only remember girls if they’re blonde with big boobs.”

Brian rolled his eyes. He turned away from me and smiled charmingly out at the crowd.

Towards the end of the parade route, someone with some wicked speakers began to blare out YMCA. I began to bounce on the back of the corvette.

They have everything that you need to enjoy, You can hang out with all the boys,” I sang. Brian seemed to forget my earlier comment and joined in with me on the ‘Y-M-C-A’ motions.

After the song ended, a crackling voice came over the speakers.

“Let’s hear it for our celebrity grand marshals. Nick Carter, Brian Littrell, Howie Dorough, AJ McLean, and Kevin Richardson – The Backstreet Boys!”

The crowd cheered. I stood up and blew kisses. Sometimes I just can’t help it.

I am a fame whore.

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If I thought the parade was impressive, the party that Sam took us to afterwards was…well, something better than impressive. It was wall to wall bodies. I had never seen so much skin in my life. And that’s saying something.

“It’s really good to see you guys again,” Andrea said as she walked on my left.

“Yeah, I can’t believe we bumped into you,” I said. “What brings you here?”

She smiled and tossed her hair. “I’m bi. I come heere every year to rock out.”

AJ turned around. He was rocking his Lady Gay Gay shirt. “I didn’t know that.”

She grinned and walked ahead of us. “There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me.”

I raised an eyebrow. I didn’t like her tone. I could smell a flirt a mile away.

“Nick, look over there!”

Brian yanked my arm and pointed. A group of men and women were gathered around cheering on a guy in a tiara. He was riding a mechanical bull. Howie, Kevin, and Addy all stopped and watched. We all winced as he flew over the front and landed on the mat. The lack of clothing made the impact look way more painful than it probably was.

“I bet I could stay on longer than him,” I said out loud.

“Bet?” Kevin said with a grin. “I’ll bet.”

I looked over at him in surprise. Of course I didn’t argue. I’m not want to turn down a challenge, bet, or dare.

“You’re on,” I said. “Twenty bucks?”

“Deal.”

“I swear you’d do anything for twenty bucks.”

I grinned. “Not anything,” I said. “But this, yes.”

I weaved through the crowd. People patted me on the back and the level of chatter in the room grew even louder. I bet it was because I was still sporting the huge honking ribbon on my chest.

“Can I give it a whirl?” I asked the girl operating the bull. She grinned.

“This I got to see,” she said. “Hop on up.”

I have never been on a riding bull, but I didn’t think it could be that hard. I’ve ridden a lot of things in my life. Mostly women, but some of them bucked pretty damn hard. I swung my leg over and hoisted myself up.

It would be great if I could say that I wowed the crowd with my amazing abilities and that in my next life I’m going to come back as a rodeo cowboy. In reality, I landed so hard and fast on the mat that I really can’t remember the bull even starting. I got up and gave the finger to the bull much to the appreciation of the crowd. I walked back over to the guys; Kevin was fanning the twenty in front of his face.

“Too bad,” he said with a grin. I scowled.

“Well, I could use a twenty. Especially since Leigh went shopping today,” Howie said. We all watched him head over to the bull and climb on. He gave a serious salute in our direction; the next moment the bull was tossing him for dear life. I couldn’t help but laugh as Howie’s arms went around the bull’s neck in a desperate attempt to stay on. Unfortunately, that was the wrong thing to do. His ass fell off first followed by the rest of him.

Brian couldn’t just stand by and watch. He was hot on Howie’s heels. I could tell by the looks on most of the guys faces in the room that if Brian were gay he would be a hot commodity. There were a lot of grins on people’s faces as he hoisted himself up on the bull.

“I know what you’re thinking. You should have seen it when you climbed on up,” Sam whispered. I didn’t even realize he had snuck up on us. “You’re the talk of the town today. Fortunately for you I’ve told everyone you’re married to one of my oldest and dearest friends.”

I laughed. “Thanks.”

Sam turned on his camera and watched the downfall of Brian. He lasted longer than me but not longer than Howie. He came back to us holding his stomach.

“I think I have mat burn,” he complained. He lifted his t-shirt. Sure enough a raw red streak was already spreading.

“Well, I guess Howie’s the winner,” I said. Howie grinned. I didn’t really think he had that much to be proud of, but I didn’t want to crush the little man’s dreams.

“Actually, I’m pretty sure I can double Howie’s time.”

All heads turned to Addy. She was studying the bull strategically, already pulling her hair up in a ponytail. Kevin looked excited…in a sexual way.

“Do it,” Brian said.

With her head held high, Addy wove through the people. It was weird seeing the country girl in faded jeans and a cut-off flannel shirt walking around people painted in all different colors and dressed in every costume imaginable. They cheered Addy on as she expertly hopped onto the bull.

I have to admit that it was the most impressive display of athleticism that I’ve seen in awhile. She was stuck like glue onto the bull. Her body seemed to anticipate the direction in which the bull would buck each time. It was almost like a dance. Just when I thought she might break the world record (even though I have no clue what it is), she landed with a graceful flop onto the mat.

The crowd went wild. I’m pretty sure no one else had done near as well the entire day. She had a little bounce in her step as she made her way back to the group. Kevin wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her softly.

“That was great,” he said lovingly. Her arms went around his neck.

“Thanks. Now it’s your turn.”

“My turn? What happens if I win? I pay myself my own twenty bucks?”

Addy leaned even closer to Kev. Her voice lowered but I was close enough to hear.

“You beat my time and…I’ll accept that engagement ring you carry around in your pocket.”

Kev’s eyes darted from her to the bull and back again.

“Really?” he said. She smiled.

“Really.”

Well, let’s just say I’ve never seen Kev move faster. The crowd was having a heyday. It wasn’t everyday that four Backstreet Boys rode a mechanical bull.

“Where did AJ go?” Brian asked. I saw him turn around.

“Dude, don’t worry about that now,” I said. “Cheer on your cousin. His engagement depends on it.”

I don’t think Brian heard that part of the bet. His head swiveled back to the action. He put two fingers in his mouth and whistled loudly.

“Go Kev!”

I hadn’t noticed before, but the girl running the bull was also keeping track of times. If Addy wasn’t watching the whole thing like a hawk, I was tempted to go and bribe her to make sure Kevin’s time won out. The sooner he got what he wanted, the better all of our lives were going to be.

I’m pretty sure that after today, Kevin’s days of mechanical bull riding are over. He started off really impressive. I was practically waiting for him to say ‘Yee-haw!’ The longer he stayed on, the surer I was that he was going to win.

Then disaster struck.

The bull seemed to speed up. Kev’s body twisted at an unnatural angle and he slid down, getting caught up in the gears. The girl manning the bull stopped the ride as quick as possible, but the damage was done. Kevin’s face was contorted in pain. Addy was by his side in a second.

“What happened?”

“I think I pulled out my back.”

The next half hour was kind of a blur. An ambulance was called and Bri and Addy took the ride to the hospital with Kev. I stayed behind with Howie. Sam stood beside us looking concerned.

“I hope he’s going to be alright.”

“I’m sure he will be. He’s tough,” I assured Sam. I didn’t want the guy to cry. If he cried I was pretty sure I would start to cry. I’m a softie that way.

“We need to find AJ,” Howie said. “I think it’s time to drive back.”

“Alright, let’s split up and meet back here in ten minutes. The place isn’t that big. It should be no problem.”

I should have known that AJ disappearing was a big problem. I had canvassed one entire room without finding him. I thought I had found him a couple times, but the Lady Gay Gay shirt was popular. I knew Sam and Howie were checking the other two rooms. I stood by the coat closet at the entrance, waiting for the other two and hoping they had better luck.

I stifled a laugh when I heard the telltale sound of two people having fun in the closet. It sounded like hangers were being yanked off the rod. I couldn’t help but think it was probably not the only rod being yanked, if you know what I mean.

Usually I don’t regret my dirty mind, but this time I did. After a few minutes, the closet door opened and Andrea slid out, disappearing back into the party crowd. I couldn’t disguise my surprise and disappointment as AJ emerged a minute later. He was so oblivious that he ended up walking right into me. His eyes widened when he realized who his road block was.

“Nick…”

“What the hell were you doing?” I couldnt hide my anger. Sometimes I boil way too close to the surface for my own good.

“It’s not what you think.” He couldn’t look me in the eye.

I snorted. “Oh really?”

I forcefully wiped a line of pink glossy lipstick off of his cheek and held it up to his eyes.

“If it’s not what I think, then you better damn well start explaining.”