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Chapter One-Hundred-Eighty-Six


“Ryan, why don’t you go upstairs and hang with the kids too? I can’t believe you actually let your sister go up there without you,” Howie suggested as he sat down next to Ryan and wrapped his arm around him as he had settled on the floor and began reading like usual.


“I really don’t want to…please don’t make me,” Ryan pleaded. Howie stared at him for a few moments.


“What book is that you’re reading? It must be really good for you to not want to put it down.”


“Treasure Island,” Ryan answered, and Howie, AJ, Brian, and Kevin all suddenly looked impressed. They never had Ryan for someone who enjoyed classics.


“Are you a big fan of pirates Ry?” Howie questioned and Ryan nodded. “Where did you find this book?”


“It was dads,” Ryan answered, forcing himself not to look up from his book in fear that tears might fall if he looks at anyone.


“But your mom locked all of his things up I thought…”


“I managed to sneak into his office and get it before she did…he told me exactly where to find it before he died…he told me to read it because I would like it. I’ve kept it hidden in my room mom has no idea I have it.”


“So your dad loved to read then?” AJ asked, as he now understands why Ryan is always reading like a maniac. Ryan nodded.


“He has a big shelf in his office that he used to call his personal Library. He has books on there that he’s had since he was my age. He also owned a real library too but it’s been closed down since he died.”


“There wasn’t anyone there to keep it running after he died?”


“They can’t.”


“Why not?”

“Well they were really close to him for one and it hurts them to go anywhere near it, and two the police say they can’t. Mom knows why but she wouldn’t tell me no matter how much I begged.” Kevin raised his eyebrow curiously.


“How long did your dad own the library?”


“Since his dad died. It belonged to his dad when he was a little boy.” Kevin looked at Howie with a look hoping he would catch onto what he is thinking. Seeing the furious look on his face though, he knows he had. Howie sat there quietly watching Ryan as he had gone back to reading his book with so much desire to finish it all because it belonged to his dad and his dad had suggested he read it before he died. It is clear that Ryan loved his dad more then anything and for his mother to keep his memories from him is cruel. He sat there watching him for a couple of moments and then he pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and he got up and walked out into the front yard closing the door behind him. He pushed a number and placed it to his ear. The phone rang a couple of times and then someone answered it.


“Hello?” came a woman’s voice.


“Hi…this is Howie Dorough. May I talk to Lindsey please? It’s important.”


“You’ve already talked to her four times today Mr. Dorough.”


“I know that, and I apologize but I need to know something from her.”


“The last time she hung up the phone from talking to you she went into a total break down. She was crying, throwing things around, and kept hitting anyone who tried to come near her. We threatened to give her a sedative if she didn’t calm down.”


“Again…I apologize, I didn’t mean to cause such chaos. But I need to know something about her son and it can’t wait.”


“Is her son ill?”


“No Ma’am…”


“Injured?”


“No, but –“


“-Then what is so important that you can’t wait until tomorrow? Why don’t you tell me what you want to know and I will ask her myself?”


“I need to talk to her myself. I need to hear the truth from her. Please ma’am…it’s important. Her son is broken hearted right now and I am trying my very hardest to make it better. You’re keeping his mother from him, at least help me out here a little bit.”


“I can’t have my patient going into a break down everytime she gets off the phone with you.”


“I will be careful, I promise.” The woman was silent on the other end for a few moments.


“If she goes into another break down and it’s so bad that we have to sedate her, you’re back to only one phone call a day with limited time.”


“Okay, I understand,” Howie replied. The woman was silent for a few moments once again.


“Alright…just a minute,” She replied, and he can tell by the tone of her voice that she is agreeing to this against her better judgement.


“Thank-you ma’am.” He waited five minutes and then the voice that he has gotten to know as Lindsey came on the other end.


“What do you want now?”


“If I remember correctly, you’re the one who called me those other three times Mrs. Sawyer,” Howie replied in what he thought was a friendly tone as he does not want to ruin things for Ryan. Which sucks because he had planned on shouting at her and relieving his anger.


“Okay…but now its you who is calling me so I am assuming that you want something.”


“Your son is hurting. I just thought you should know that.”


“I think you made that perfectly clear the last time that you talked to me.”


“Yeah, I hear it had such an effect on you. Good to know you care after all.”


“I care about my son,” Lindsey insisted firmly.


“Oh yeah? Then how about you tell me why you refused to tell him that he inherited his father’s library?” Lindsey suddenly grew very silent on the other end.


“What’s the matter? Can’t come up with anymore excuses for your own selfish ways?”


“How did you find out about the library?” she asked softly.


“From Ryan. Who so badly needs to talk to people about his father.”


“He is too young to be running a library. If you haven’t noticed he is nine years old.”


“Well that’s obvious, but you could at least let him know that it’s his for later!”


“Why don’t you tell him since you’re the one there for him and all.”


“That is beside the point. He should have heard it from you instead of a bunch of lies. And don’t you start getting upset. If you have another break down you’re back to limited phone calls with Ryan is that what you want?”


“You could at least be a little more sensitive and maybe I wouldn’t get upset.”


“I am trying my very hardest but you’re not making it easy.” Lindsey was silent for a couple of moments.


“You really care about him don’t you?”


“Yes I do. And it breaks my heart that you keep these secrets from him. He loves his father very much and just because it hurts you to remember right now it doesn’t mean he can’t remember either.”


“Let me talk to him…I’ll tell him.”


“No.”


“He’s not still upset with me is he?”


“I don’t want to risk you getting emotional and having a breakdown. You need to rest.”


“I want to talk to him.”


“In the morning. You can get to know Alex then too. But right now you need your rest. I am telling your doctor to give you a sedative.”


“Don’t you dare, I don’t want to go to sleep right now!”


“You need to. I can hear it in your voice how stressed you’re and you had that big break down earlier. It could help you Lindsey.”


“You just called me Lindsey…” She replied, sounding very shocked that he had done so, since he’s called her Mrs. Sawyer since the first time they spoke.


“Yeah, yeah…don’t make such a big deal of it or I might start going back to last name basis with you.” Howie replied while rolling his eyes some.


“Thank-you,” Lindsey spoke softly.


“For what?” Howie asked startled, as he hadn’t expected that. He did after all, call her up to bitch at her.


“For caring about Ryan…he needs it. Tell him I love him for me okay? And that I’m sorry for everything.” For the first time since they spoke Howie could actually hear the sincerity in her voice. But he could also hear that she is about to cry.


“I will…but you have to promise me something too.”


“What is it?”


“That you will get better so that Ryan and Laila don’t lose their mother too.”


“I will I promise.”


“And Lindsey?”


“Hmm?”


“Please don’t have a breakdown. Ryan will be crushed if he has to go back to limited phone calls.”


“I’ll try not to…”


“Which is why I have to ask your doctor to give you a sedative. You need to sleep all of these emotions away.”


“If it were that simple to get rid of my pain I wouldn’t be here right now…”


“I’m not saying it’s going to take away your pain. Only time can do that…and it won’t take it away completely, but I promise you it’s going to get better. You just have to find a way…but if you sleep it will calm you down.”


“I don’t want to.”


“You really should…trust me alright? I’m not such a horrible guy you know…”


“Some how I am starting to get that feeling.” Howie suddenly found himself smiling at her words and he has no idea why.


“Hand the phone to your doctor okay?” It was silent on the other end for a few moments, and then suddenly he heard the voice of the doctor that he was speaking to earlier.


“I hadn’t expected to have to talk to you again, I thought I was going to have to calm down a hysterical Lindsey.”


“I wasn’t going to ruin it for Ryan. I kept her calm…but anyway, I wanted to talk about her with you…how is she doing?”


“I’m not sure if I’m allowed to discuss that with you. You aren’t her family.”


“No but I am the man who is fostering her child…I think I have a right to know for the best interest of Ryan.”


“I think you’re a little more then just the man fostering her child,” the doctor replied, and he can just hear the suggestive tone in her voice. “But anyway…other then that breakdown she had earlier, she’s doing okay…but she could be doing better. She is an emotional wreck a lot of the time…a very angry woman. We have her attending therapy sessions and she is encouraged to express her feelings but it’s still very hard for her because all she wants to do is suppress them. That’s as far as her depression goes…on the other hand she enjoys playing cards and board games with the other patients sometimes and we have her doing activities such as art projects and such to keep her busy.”


“Will she be okay to have visitors a day or two after thanksgiving? I told Ryan I would see about him and Laila visiting.”


“I think that would be very good for her…if she had family here encouraging her to get better.”


“Okay…good. I have something good to tell Ryan then. But may I make a suggestion?”


“Of course, Mr. I’m just the man who is fostering her child,” the doctor replied and he could just tell she is smirking.


“I think you should give her that sedative you threatened to give her earlier. I think if she was forced to have some real sleep it could really do a lot emotionally.”


“I will take it into consideration. Thanks for the advice Mr. Dorough,” the doctor replied in an amused tone.


“I’m just looking out for my foster child’s parent.”


“Oh I can see that, there is no need to convince me.”


“But anyway, I have to go now. Talk to you later.”


“Yeah I have a feeling that we will. Bye Mr. Dorough.”


“Bye,” Howie replied, and he hung up his phone. He put it back into his pocket and he headed into the house again to see Ann introducing Ryan to her entire book shelf collection. She is telling him that if he finishes that book while he is in Kentucky and wants another one to read he is more then welcome to borrow one of hers. That he could even take it back to Florida with him and Kevin would mail it back to her when he is finished. He could see the smile on Ryan’s face and smiled too. When the two of them finished talking Ryan turned to head back to his spot to read again when he saw Howie standing there and became serious.


“What did you talk to my mom about?” he questioned.

“How do you know I talked to your mom?” Howie asked with a raised eyebrow.


“Because you’re always talking to my mom,” Ryan shrugged and he went over and laid down.


“I am not,” Howie insisted. “Just four times today because she called me.”


“Everytime I get off the phone with her you insist on talking to her and then you spend hours on the phone with her.” Howie gaped at him and Harold who had arrived earlier just laughed.


“He’s right you know.” Howie scoffed at this accusation.


“Only because I think it’s important since I am helping her raise her son for awhile,” he insisted.


“And yet, you seem so defensive about the subject,” AJ pointed out amusedly.


“I am not!”


“Aww Howie I think it’s great that you’re getting to know her. Don’t get upset,” Denise insisted and she patted him on the back though Harold could see the meaning behind her smile.


“Thank-you Denise,” Howie replied indignantly and he wrapped his arms around her for a hug. When he pulled away he turned and went over and sat next to Ryan who was looking up at him expectantly, waiting for him to tell him what he talked about with his mother.


“So I have some news for you buddy.”


“I get to visit my mom when we get back to Florida?”


“Yes you do,” Howie nodded and Ryan beamed. “But that’s not all I have to tell you.”


“What is it?”


“You know how your father’s library was passed down to him after his father died?”


“Yeah…”


“Well, it turns out, that it’s been passed down to you too for when you’re old enough to run it.” Ryan gaped up at him in shock.


“Really?”


“Mhm. That is why the police wouldn’t let any of your father’s employees run it. It legally belongs to you now. Your father had written it in his will. You know what a will is don’t you?” Ryan nodded as a single tear rolled down his cheek. “They couldn’t run it, because it belongs to you and they need your permission first.”


“They can do it. They can open it up again…that’s what dad would’ve wanted…he loved that Library. Janet was his assistant…she can keep it going until I get old enough to take over.” Howie smiled at him and ruffled his fingers through Ryan’s hair before pulling him into a hug. Ryan leaned into him and hugged him back and for the first time he feels happy that he is stuck with Howie. Howie makes everything better.