Chapter Seven:
The next morning Nick opened his eyes to find himself still lying in Ashley’s bed with her snuggled up next to him but Dakota, his little early bird was of course already awake and gone. He looked down at Ashley expecting to find her still sleeping but he discovered that she was very much awake and was just lying there looking up at him. Their eyes met, his blue ones staring into her chocolate brown ones and he smiled at her making her smile back. He could get used to this… waking up to her lying next to him every morning, her beautiful face being the first thing he sees when he opens his eyes.
“Hey you….did you sleep okay?” he asked her, as he wrapped his arm more around her and pulled her closer to him. She rested her head against his chest.
“Yeah I did…it was nice.” She answered softly.
“That’s good. Did you happen to see my Little Early Bird wake up this morning by any chance?”
“Yeah she did about an hour ago. I felt her moving and woke up just on time to see her crawl out of bed and leave the room headed in the direction of the elevator.”
“What time was that at?” He asked, still feeling a little bit sleepy and he looked at the clock to see that it was nine in the morning.
“At about eight o’ clock.”
“Hmm…well shall we go see what’s going on downstairs? We slept through breakfast already but I bet I could get us some muffins or something. Yesterday’s events must’ve really worn us out eh?”
“Yeah it did. I’m not that hungry though so a muffin sounds nice….”
“Okay, lets go then.” He replied, and he got up and she sat up in bed and looked at him. He offered her his hand and she took it.
“Lets see how you are on walking honey… it’s been a couple of days you should be starting to get better enough to where you can start getting around by yourself a little more.” He carefully pulled her out of bed and then let go of her hand but he kept his arm behind her ready to help her if she should lose her balance. She began to walk toward the door with him close to her side. They left her room and went down to the elevator and Nick didn’t have to help her at all along the way. When they got down to the lobby and stepped out of the elevator they found Brian and Riley standing there. Riley had just finished talking to a couple of children and they were just running off.
“Hey Nicky,” Brian greeted and then he looked at Ashley. “Wow Ash…it’s good to see you walking on your own, are you feeling better?” Ashley grinned proudly and nodded.
“I’m happy that I get to be a little more independent now. My injuries are starting to heal up quite a bit.”
“I’ll bet you’re. I’m happy for you sweetie.” Ashley looked at Nick and he smiled at her. She moved closer to him still feeling a little shy around Brian and she slid her hand into his. Sensing her shyness he squeezed her hand gently letting her know that everything was okay, than he looked at Riley.
“You two slept late. You even missed breakfast. I’ve never seen that happen before…at least not with Nick anyway.”
“Yeah, Ash and I have reached the conclusion that it was yesterday’s events that caused us to sleep in. We had a pretty eventful day I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of people slept in longer than usual.”
“Actually I think you two might be right. The cafeteria did seem a little emptier than usual.”
“But of course not Dakota. My little early bird never sleeps in for anything. Do you know where she’s at?” he asked, looking slightly thrown off. He had expected to see her hanging around Brian and/or Riley but when he didn’t it confused him.
“She’s in a meeting with Brooke…” Riley answered, her voice softening and Nick suddenly noticed her becoming very interested in the pattern in the carpet. He looked at Brian confused and saw that he looked just as uncomfortable as Riley.
“….What’s going on? What meeting?” He asked, and he felt Ashley stiffen beside him. Something isn’t right. She knows something isn’t right and she hopes to god it isn’t what she was scared would happen for quite some time now. Dakota is just too cute not to be noticed by parents seeking to adopt children.
“Well…Nick…don’t get upset or anything nothing’s final right now. But…um…you know that interview you and Brian did last night after the concert?”
“Yeah…what about it? What does that have to do with my Dakota?”
“Well…” Brian started this time when he noticed Riley look at Brian for help with this part. “It was on the news…and uh, well, there’s really no easier way to put this so I’m just going to come right out and say it. A couple saw her on TV this morning and fell completely in love with her. So they came in this morning and asked if they could meet her. Brooke and Riley both asked them several times if they maybe wanted to meet some of the other children first in hopes to lure them away from Dakota but they insisted on seeing Dakota. So they’re in Brooke’s office right now talking to her…” Nick’s heart broke at Brian’s words and it felt like the wind had just been knocked out of him. Just looking into the eyes of his best friend, Brian knows Nick is not taking this very well at all just as he had feared.
“Oh…well t-that’s great,” Nick replied, putting on a fake smile and Brian and Riley exchanged looks of worry between each other. “Dakota will finally have a family. Just like she had always wanted” He added, trying his very hardest to be strong. He knows that he has to be strong for Dakota. He knows in his heart that she needs this more than anything. It’s what’s best for her. And he loves her and will do anything to see that she gets the best. Suddenly the door to Brooke’s office opened and out came Brooke, the couple that Riley and Brian were talking about, and an upset Dakota trailing behind them. She doesn’t appear to be upset, but just looking at her Nick knows that she is. Nick looked quickly away from Dakota not wanting to see how upset she is. If he sees how upset she is it will make it much harder for him to be strong for her. He instead looked at the parents. He looked them over carefully making sure they’re really the perfect parents for his little angel. The woman was about 5’7 and she has long brown hair that reaches just a bit past her shoulders and dark brown eyes. She’s wearing a white tank top and a pair of blue jeans and she’s wearing black and white converse shoes. She looks like a nice enough mommy for Dakota. The man beside her looks almost six feet tall, and he’s very thin. He’s wearing a black t-shirt and some blue denim shorts. He’s got brown eyes, he’s bald, and he has a goatee. Kind of reminds him of AJ a little bit. He’s got tattoos and his lip is pierced. He looks like a nice man though.
“Hey Brooke…what’s going on? Who are they?” Nick asked, pretending he doesn’t know what’s going on and waiting to be introduced. He wants to meet them and talk to them. He wants to get to know them before they decide to take Dakota. But just looking into his eyes Brooke knows he knows exactly what is going on and she knows he’s not happy at all. She feels so horrible for him.
“Hey Nick… this is Mr. and Mrs. Parson and they’re thinking about adopting Dakota.” Brooke introduced, being sure to emphasize the word ‘thinking‘. “Mr. and Mrs. Parson, this is Nick. He’s been Dakota’s caregiver since she was just three days old,“ She went on with her introduction. Hearing it for the second time was even harder for Nick to bear but he sucked it up the best he could and gave Brooke the fakest smile he could possibly give and she saw right through it.
“It’s nice to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Parson. You won’t regret it if you decide to adopt her…she’s the sweetest little girl ever and very loving…she’s my little angel.”
“Well we’re still thinking about it right now but it’s looking very good,” Mr. Parson replied, smiling down at Dakota and she smiled back but Nick who only glanced at her for a short minute noticed it was fake. “We just need to go home and talk about it with our son. He’s in school right now or else we would have brought him with us. He still doesn’t know about her as we saw the news right after we had gotten back from dropping him off.”
“Well don’t take too long in your decision… you won’t regret having her.” Nick replied.
“We won’t,” Mrs. Parson replied, and she looked at Dakota as did her husband.
“We’ll be back with our decision tomorrow Dakota. See you soon okay?”
“Kay…” Dakota replied softly and they looked at Brooke.
“Bye Mr. and Mrs. Parson,” She replied, smiling politely at them. “See you tomorrow.” She added and they nodded and walked toward the door. As soon as they were gone and out the door Dakota looked up at Nick, now letting her tears fall.
“They’re NOT adopting me!” she shouted.
“Why baby? They’re really nice people…weren’t they? They looked nice to me.” Nick insisted as he tried his very hardest to hold back his tears and he crouched down in front of her, finally really looking at her for the first time.
“Because I don’t want them to! I don’t want to go live with them Nicky, I don’t!”
“Why not? You would finally have a family Dakota. A mommy and a daddy…and even a little brother. Isn’t that what you wanted?” he asked gently.
“Yeah and they said that you would have your own room, your own play set out in the backyard, and even a puppy.” Brooke added.
“A puppy? That’s great! You have always wanted a puppy Dakota.”
“But I wants you more…” Dakota replied softly, even more tears falling from her eyes now and she looked up at Nick pleadingly. Nick’s heart broke even more at these words.
“I know sweetie… but the Parson’s are what’s best for you. You have to go with them so that you will finally have a family. You have always wanted a family and it’s finally happening. Don’t you remember all those times when families would come in looking to adopt and they picked all the other kids around you but never even looked at you? Remember how sad you were? This is finally your chance…”
“They’re NOT what’s best for me.” Dakota replied, becoming slightly angry toward Nick. “You’re Nicky. I want YOU to adopt me!” Nick looked a little taken aback at her words and he sat there staring at her in shock. He sat there just looking at her in silence for a couple of minutes and he finally let the tears he had been holding back the entire time fall.
“Kota sweetie…I can’t adopt you…” He answered after awhile, his voice so soft it’s amazing that everyone in the lobby had even heard him.
“WHY NOTS???” Dakota asked, and she finally began to really cry. “You’re already pretty much my daddy anyway!”
“Because you deserve someone way better… someone way better than me.”
“There isn’t anyone better than you Nicky. You’re all I’ve ever known!” Dakota argued. Nick sighed heavily.
“Honey, you deserve a mommy and daddy,” he stated gently. “It’s just me - I have no mommy to give you…. And I am hardly ever home. I am on the road constantly and when I am not on the road I am always here working. I go home maybe once every week just to get more clothes and then come right back here. I practically live in your room Dakota. That’s no life for you. For a four year old… you need a stable home with a mommy and daddy… and a backyard to play in. And right now I can’t give you that.”
"I don'ts wants that!" Dakota exclaimed. "All I wants is YOU Nicky!!!!"
“I know that honey… but you deserve so much better. I only want what’s best for you and I will do anything to see that you get what’s best for you. What’s best for you is the Parsons. You don’t understand now but some day you will. I love you so much… but no. I can’t adopt you.”
“I’ll run away if you let them take me! I wills!”
“No you won’t baby…I know that you won’t. The Parsons are a nice loving family and as soon as you go home with them and meet your new brother, and see the playground in your backyard, and your new room, and your puppy you will forget all about being angry with me. You will see that I love you and I was only trying to give you what you deserve.”
“You don’t loves me!” Dakota accused. “You’re a liar!”
“I do too love you baby. I wouldn’t lie about that. If only you know how hard it is to give you up…” Nick insisted, his voice cracking.
“If you really loved me you wouldn’t gives me up EVER!”
“Sometimes when you really love someone… you just have to let them go. I know that you don’t understand that right now…and it’s okay because you’re still really young but you’re going to some day.”
“NO I won’ts! I will never understand Nicky. GO AHEAD Lets me go! But just know that I HATES you!” she yelled at him.
“I know you don’t mean that…”
“Yes I do!” She demanded angrily, and she took her charm bracelet that he had given her off and she threw it at him.
“Dakota…”
“LEAVE ME ALONE!” She cried, and she turned and ran toward the elevator. She got to it just as someone was coming out of it and ran into it and pushed the button to her floor. Nick watched as the elevator door closed, than he looked down at the bracelet on the floor. He picked it up and stared at it for a couple of minutes, as he finally really let his tears fall.
“Nick….buddy…are you okay?” Brian asked softly as he’s almost crying himself. Nick didn’t answer. He only stood up and he angrily kicked a box of papers that was nearby and he ran out of the orphanage. He needed to get out. He needed to get away where people wouldn’t see him cry. As far as he knows he’s doing the right thing. He’s doing what he thinks is best for his angel. So why does he feel so horrible? Brian sighed and he looked at Riley and Ashley, the both of them standing there in tears. Ashley standing there feeling angry inside. How could Nick just let her go? How can he be so stupid? Sure he is doing what he thinks is best for her but in reality it’s NOT what’s best. There is nobody in this world who can love Dakota as much as Nick does. She practically is his all he has to do is make it official. Anyone who ever watched them together could see that. So why is he being so stupid?
“Do you think he will really let her go?” Riley asked softly, looking at Brian for answers.
“I don’t know…but I’m going to go talk to him. I’ll be right back…” Brian replied and he turned and went after Nick. He went outside to see him sitting on the curb of the sidewalk, his face in his hands and he is sobbing. All the emotions he held in when trying to be strong for Dakota coming out. Brian went and sat next to Nick and he wrapped his arm around his shoulder. Knowing that it’s Brian, Nick leaned into him and cried harder. Brian wrapped both arms around him and hugged him tight just letting him get it all out. After a long while when Nick had calmed down enough to talk Brian finally spoke.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked him gently.
“Why does it have to be so hard Brian?” Nick asked after a couple of minutes, and he looked up at his best friend. “Why does it have to be so hard to do what’s best for her?”
“Because you love her Nick… and it’s never easy to let go of someone that you love more than life.”
“But I have to… I have to do what’s best for her and that’s it Bri… The Parson’s are what’s best for her. Right?”
“Are you sure that’s what’s best for her Nick?”
“Yeah… I mean what other option is there? I can’t possibly adopt her…I could never give her what she truly needs.”
“Are you sure? Because I could’ve sworn you’ve already given her everything that she truly needs…”
“She needs a mother Bri…and I can’t give her that. All the girls I date turn out to be money hungry girls who just use me until they‘ve gotten what they wanted and then they‘re gone. And I don’t want Dakota to have to go through that. It’s already hard enough on me. She would get close to the girl and then one day she’ll leave me and it’ll affect her too.”
“All the more reason for you to change the type of girls you date Nick…I mean they can’t be that hard to spot anymore these days can they? You’ve dated them enough to know better. Just don’t date those kind of girls and you will be fine.”
“But that’s not the only problem here. I am hardly ever home. I am always on the road with the Backstreet Boys, and I am always on the move. And when I’m not on the road I am here working. I barley even go home when I’m here even. I practically live here at the orphanage. That’s no life for a four year old is it? I can’t force her to grow up like that…I want her childhood to be as normal as possible. And what about management? What about the fans? What would they think? Lou already doesn’t approve of her right now and she’s not even really mine. Think about what he would do if I actually adopted her, Bri.”
“He can’t really do anything, buddy. Not anymore. You’re twenty years old that makes you an adult. You can make your own decisions. If he tells you that you can’t have Dakota then I will threaten to quit the band. And I’m pretty sure Kevin would throw a huge fit too. And no one wins when you make Kevin angry. You of all people should know that. And as for the fans…we’ll worry about that when the time comes. They’ll get used to it. They’ll learn to love her. Who doesn’t love Dakota?? Ashley even loves her! She was the first person out of this entire building to get her trust. It’s hard NOT to love Dakota. And the fans love you no matter what you do. The real ones do anyway…the real ones will always have your back - even with Dakota in the picture. They’ve supported you this far haven’t they? You’ve had her since she was just three days old Nick and they already know about her and you don’t see us losing fans left and right do you?”
“No but -”
“- If you adopt her you will just be making it official. She’s already pretty much your daughter anyway; you just have to claim her. There is no one in this entire world who could love Dakota as much as you do. The guys and I have been watching you with her for four years now and none of us can even begin to imagine what it’s like to see you without her. I have to admit that in the beginning we didn’t think you could do it. At the time you were an annoying 16 year old little brat who was always pulling pranks on everyone and all you cared about was Nintendo. But you proved us wrong. She’s changed you over the years, you’ve become so much more mature over the years - still the annoying 20 year old who likes to pull pranks - and loves Nintendo a lot but when it comes to taking care of Dakota you know when to become serious. You love her Nick, and she loves you and is pretty well-behaved because of you. Make it official, it’s about time.”
“I-I don’t know…” Nick replied softly, as he looks down at the charm bracelet in his hand. “I need to think about it for awhile…”
“Well don’t take too long thinking about it Nick…you only have until tomorrow. In the mean time….if you’re okay I’m going to go in and find Riley. It’s noon and time for our break and we’ve got plans. So I will see you later on tonight okay?” Nick nodded quietly not taking his eyes off the charm bracelet. Brian looked at him for a couple of minutes, and then he got up and walked back into the Orphanage.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Here's the next chapter.
Enjoy =)
Enjoy =)
