Nick walked in our bedroom with a package of saltines. He gently placed them in my hand and got back under the covers.

“Thanks sugar lips.” I kissed his cheek.

“Anything for you. I was thinking about something.”

“You were?” I asked in mock surprise. Nick ran his hands through his hair.

“I think we need a bigger house.”

“What ever gave you that idea?” I munched on a cracker.

“I just don’t think there’s enough room with another baby on the way.”

“Nicky, I love this house. Jackson will be moving out soon. That gives us an extra room.”

“What about when he comes home for the summer or on breaks. We can’t have him sleeping in the dog house.”

“Can’t we build him a room over the garage? I just don’t think I could handle moving right now.” I said quietly. The thoughts of moving made me sick to my already nauseous stomach.

“I know you don’t want to move, but baby girl this house is just to small for us. I saw a house that would be perfect for us.”

“Really now? Do tell.” My husband always had some scatterbrained idea.

“It’s gorgeous and located on a private beach. The master bedroom includes a bathroom and a connecting nursery suite. The nursery isn't as big as Rory’s, but you’ll love it. There would be a bedroom for Jacks, Rachey, and Aiden. Lucas and Liam will have a room to share. Lo Lo and Rory will have a room together. The backyard is huge with a swimming pool and enough room for all the kids’ toys. There’s even a guest cottage for your mom when she visits. The basement has an area for Rachey to practice her dancing and for my studio. It’s perfect.” He gushed.

“How are we going to afford this house? It sounds perfect, but it’s got to be expensive.” I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. Even though Nick made decent money, we still watched our pennies. With seven kids and one on the way, we couldn’t afford to be foolish with our money.

“Yeah, well the cost is high, but I think we can manage.” He looked at me.

“What’s the cost?” I raised an eyebrow at him. I knew it was going to be high from the look he gave me.

“Umm….six million.”

“Are you out of your fucking mind, Nickolas Gene Carter?” I screamed and hit him with my pillow.

“There’s no need for violence.” He kept my pillow.

“You are the dumbest man I ever met. Why did I ever marry you?” He smirked at me, which pissed me off even more.

“It must be those hormones. You know you love me.”  He reached out to hug me. I scooted closer to the edge of the bed.

“This has nothing to do with hormones. It has to do with your stupidity. I know that we aren’t destitute, but how can you sit here and justify spending six million on a house?”  I questioned. He had better have a good answer.

“I know the developer for the house. He’s a good friend of mine.”

“Good now I can kill you and Howie.”

“Just listen to me. I wanted this to be a surprise, but I kind of ruined it by telling you. I suck at secrets.”

“Just tell me.” Being married to Nick was like being married to a five year old.

“I just sold my music mixing software to Nintendo. They are creating this new gaming system that includes a music creating software and design program.”

“OH, NICK!!! That is wonderful. I’m so proud of you.” I scooted closer to my husband and pressed my lips to his. It was a passion filled kiss that left me wanting more.

“They bought it for forty million. Plus, I will make one million for the next five years.”

“Wow! You’re amazing baby.” I beamed at him. He made me so proud.

“I have another secret.” He paused. “I already bought the house.”

“Nick, I better like this house. If not, you can go live in it by yourself. There’s no way I’ll let you back out on Howie.” I fumed.

“Trust me baby girl, you’ll love the house.

------------------------------

I have to say that Nick knows me better than I know myself sometimes. He was right about the house. It was absolutely breathtaking. The house was open and full of sunlight. The yard was ten times bigger than the where we lived now. The beach was behind us. It was everything I wanted and more. I couldn’t wait to move in.

Nick and I decided to show the house to the kids. They were running around looking in all of the rooms, while Nick and I sat with our feet in the pool.

“Mom, this house is awesome. Did you see the little dance room?” Rachel sat down with us.

“I know.  This house is perfect for us.”

“Mommy, we want peerates.” Liam announced.

“You want what?”

“Peerates.” He looked at me like I had three heads.

“I think he wants pirates.” Nick whispered in my ear.

“You want pirates.” He nodded.

“For da room.” Lucas added.

“Okay. We can decorate your room in pirates.”

“Yea.” They both sang and started running around.

All the kids were playing with Nick. I noticed Jackson was missing. I went into the house to find him. I found him sitting on the window seat in the living room.

“Jackson are you okay?” I gently touched his shoulder.

“I guess.” He quickly rubbed the tears from his eyes.

“I know you hate me at the moment, but I’m here for you.”

“I don’t hate you mom. Everything’s changing. I don’t think I can deal with it all.” I rubbed his arm as I sat down next to him.

“I feel the same way. Things have been hectic these past few years. Each time I think life has slowed down, something new comes up.”

“Mom, that’s exactly how I feel. I’m almost finished with school. I don’t know what I want to do. I don’t know where I want to go to school. I have nothing figured out.”  He raked his fingers through his hair. He reminded me of his father.

“You’re seventeen; you don’t have to have everything figured out. I’m forty-two and more clueless now than I was at your age.”

“I get jealous of Rachel. She has everything planned and figured out.  Rachel wants to go to New York and be a Rockette. She’s waiting for true love to sweep her off her feet. Girls only want to sleep with me because I’m Nick Carter’s son.”  Jackson shared with me honestly.

I felt like a horrible parent. Where had I been to not notice my son was hurting? Was I so focused on the little ones that I forgot my older children needed me? I certainly wasn’t mother of the year.

“Jackson, you are a wonderful young man. Anyone who doesn’t see that is blind. Don’t settle for any girl. The right one will come along. Your focus should be on having fun and enjoying your senior year. I know college is coming right around the corner. What might you be interested in?”

“I was thinking about sports medicine or physical therapy.”

“I think those are excellent choices. You are smart and can do anything you put your mind to.”

“Mom, I’m sorry for being such a jerk lately. You didn’t do anything wrong. I was angry at the world, and I took it out on you. I’m sorry.” I pulled him into my arms.

“I love you Jackson. More than you’ll ever know. If you have a problem, come to me. I’m here to help you.”

“Thanks, mom. Congrats on the new baby.”

We sat there hugging each other. Being a parent was never easy. I may have thought everything was fine with my children, but they each had their own set of issues.