Nothing. That’s exactly what I had left in my life. I didn’t picture my life ending up this way. Dreams. Sure, I had dreams, but they were long gone. They went away when my life fell apart. Things were different now. They would always be different. I regret some of the choices I made. Other choices were well worth the pain and agony.

I knocked on the door and silently prayed that it wouldn’t slam in my face. My two year old son held onto my hand and hugged a teddy bear with the other.

The door slowly opened. The woman looked at me and smiled unsurely.

“Is that you, Josie?” I nodded. “Come in.”

Slowly, my son and I walked into the house I had loved since I was a little girl. It was like coming home. All my nerves and trepidation disappeared as soon as I walked into the living room.

“It’s been so long.” Jackie sat across from me.

“I know. I’m sure you’re shocked to see me.” I stared at the carpet. Shane sat next to me sucking on the ear of his teddy bear.

“A little. It’s been so long. I’ve worried about you. So has Brian.” She said in a caring tone.

“I doubt that.” There was no way Brian would have missed me. After the falling out we had, it was impossible for us to be friends again. I didn’t know why I was sitting in his parent’s house.

Grabbing my son’s hand, I got up to leave. This was a bad idea.

“Don’t leave. The weather is bad. Why don’t I fix you both some lunch, and we can get to know each other again. Plus who is this adorable little boy?” Jackie said softly.

“This little monkey is Shane. Shane say hi to Mrs. Jackie.”

He grinned at her and waved.

Shane was shy. He didn’t spend a lot of time with anyone but me. Shane and I were a pair. We didn’t need anyone.

---------------------------------

After lunch, I put Shane down for a nap. He was extremely tired from the traveling we had done to get back to Kentucky.

“Josie, what’s the real reason you came home?” She questioned me.

“The truth is I have no where to go. After mom died, everything started to fall apart. I made some bad choices. Shane and I are homeless. The only things we have are in the bag I have with me.” I couldn’t look Jackie Littrell in the eye. I was embarrassed about my lifestyle. I didn’t want to look bad in her eyes.

“Sweetheart, how did this happen? I lost track of you after you and Brian had that falling out.”

“After our friendship ended, I ran as far away as possible. I worked one dead end job after another. I finally ran out of options.” Tears fell from my eyes. “I had to come home.”

“Where are you going to stay?”

“I don’t know. I have about fifty bucks to my name. I haven’t thought that far ahead. My goal was to get me and Shane to Kentucky.” I rubbed the hole in my faded blue jeans.

“You are more than welcome to stay here until you get back on your feet. Brian’s old room is empty. You and Shane could stay in there.”

“I couldn’t impose. I didn’t come to visit you so you would take me in. I just wanted to let you know I was back in Tates Creek.” My voice cracked.

“Nonsense. You’re family. Your mom was my best friend. She would kill me if I didn’t help you.” Jackie said firmly.

“What about Brian?” I rubbed Shane’s back. He was sleeping so peacefully.

“What about him? Neither of you will tell me what happened. I respect both of your wishes and won’t discuss it. I don’t understand it. I won’t leave you to live on the streets. You have a son to think about.”

“He’s adorable isn’t he?”

“He certainly is. Let’s go get your room ready. It’s good to have you back.” She gave me a hug.

“It’s good to be back.”

-------------------------

“What are you going to tell Brian?” Harold asked his wife.

“I don’t know. I was shocked when I opened the door and saw her on the porch.”

“She looks so fragile and lost. She’s not the same Josie. It’s hard to believe she’s a mom.”

“Something’s up. She’s not ready to talk yet. We have to give her time. Shane is adorable with his dirty blonde hair and blue eyes.” She put the dishes in the sink.

“Do you think he’s Brian’s?” Harold asked seriously.

“I don’t think so. They were best friends, not lovers.” Jackie looked at her husband.

“I think they loved each other more than we think. They were so close, then all of sudden they hated each other. Then she ran away. Shane has his eyes and the Littrell nose.”

“But why wouldn’t she have told Brian? You know he would take responsibility for his child.” Jackie’s eyes were filled with worry. She was more confused than ever.

“We’re just going to have to give it time. I think there is more to this situation. I bet it has a lot to do with their falling out.”

I stood at the doorway listening to Jackie and Harold. I knew they were curious about everything. I didn’t have the heart to tell them the truth. It would disappoint them, and at this moment I didn’t need anyone else hating me. All I would have left is my son.

I slowly walked into the kitchen. “Is there anything I can do to help out? Shane fell asleep instantly. He was exhausted from the trip.”

“Everything is under control. You could enlighten us about your misunderstanding with Brian.” Jackie prodded.

I sat at the table with my head hanging down. I couldn’t look at Brian’s parents. They would never understand what happened between us. After all these years I thought he would have told them. Then again, he was embarrassed about what happened that night three years ago.

“Jackie let her be. She’ll talk when she’s ready.” Harold admonished his wife. I looked up at him and gave him a half smile.

“I didn’t mean to pry. I just don’t understand what happened. You were the best of friends, and then something happened. You know he misses you.”

“I highly doubt that. We both grew up and changed. It was time to go our separate ways. I’m sorry, Jackie. I never meant for it to happen. Just to let you know it was all my fault.” I got on my feet and left the room. There was no way I could explain how much I loved her son.