Brian sat down across from me in the booth. We decided to go somewhere neutral to talk. I suggested a public place, so that we wouldn’t fight. I wanted to discuss things like rational adults.

We quickly ordered our food. Both of us sat silently staring at each other. I didn’t even know where to begin. Apparently Brian didn’t either.

“Are we going to stare at each other all night?” Brian asked me.

“Well as much as I like the view, I think we need to get things out in the open.”

“ I am that cute, aren’t I?” He teased and threw his straw wrapper at me.

“You think highly of yourself.” I commented with a tsk.

“Anyways.”

“What happened between us?” I had to be strong. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to know the truth.

“That’s a huge question. Can’t you start with something smaller?”

“Fine Brian. Why did you sleep with me?” I asked sharply.

“Josie, seeing you in that dress being all flirty made me feel things.” He paused. “You stirred something within me that I hadn’t felt in a long time.”

“But you were getting married. You were so in love with Tiara, but yet you slept with me. I really don’t get that.”

“You didn’t say no that night. I loved Tiara, but that night you brought something out of me. It was like I woke up and suddenly saw the world differently.”

“Bri, I was the same girl you knew your whole life. I didn’t change.”

He looked at me in disbelief. Brian was the one who changed.

“You don’t even get it. Josie, things changed before that night.”

The waiter brought our food. We continued our discussion as we ate.

“I don’t understand.”

“Things started to change after your mom passed away.”

“How?” I gave him a puzzled look.

Brian stared at his plate in deep thought. I was baffled by our conversation. Brian wasn’t making any sense to me. I hope he would be able to help me understand.

“Every time we cuddled or were close, I felt something. I wasn’t sure what it meant. I know that you were dealing with a lot at the time and we spent more time together.”

“Were these feelings you ever had with someone else?

“No. I was dating Tiara at the time. My feelings for you were changing. I was trying to figure it all out.”

“How long did those feelings last?” I took a sip of my drink.

“I don’t think they’ve gone away.”

“What?” I shrieked. “Then why do you always act like that night meant nothing. I’ve heard you say how embarrassing that night was. That hurts.”

He hung his head. Brian was pissed that I had called him out. I wanted to hear what he had to say. I just hoped that he was honest.

“I was embarrassed with how I treated you the next morning. I was an ass towards you. That’s what I regret the most.”

“You mean you don’t regret sleeping with me?”

“I did at first because I cheated on my fiancée. Who does that?” He took my hand in his. “When I woke up with you naked in my arms, I freaked out. I took it out on you. I was guilty of cheating.”

“That night was special. I’ve never had anyone make love to me like that. We spent the whole night making love, and it crushed me that you treated me that way.  Why didn’t you tell Tiara what happened?"

“I didn’t want her to hate me. I loved her, but now I realize that I wasn’t in love with her. I think I was using her to forget about you.” He smiled shyly at me.

“Brian, I’ve never known you to be that kind of guy.” I commented. Did I really know the real Brian?

“Josie, I’m not perfect. I didn’t mean to hurt you or Tiara. Nick has been helping me sort out my feelings. I didn’t come up with realization until about two days ago. I’ve been fooling myself for all these years. Now I know why all my relationships failed. I love you Josephine Fitzgerald.”

I just looked at Brian. I was too stunned to speak. I removed my hand from his.

“Are you going to say anything?”

Actually I wanted to smack him in the head. Did he really think because he uttered his devotion to me that things were going to change? So what, he loved me. That didn’t mean anything had changed between us. Hell he could be telling me this so that he could get closer to Shane. I just didn’t trust him.

I slid out of the booth and hurried out of the restaurant. I grabbed my cell phone out of my purse and called Nick.

“Hello!”

“Nick, can you come pick me up?” Tears started falling down my face.

“Sure, Jo-Jo. What’s wrong?”

“I don’t want to talk about it. Just come get me. I’m at the Pizza Hut near Wal-Mart.”

“I’ll be there in ten minutes.” Brian walked over to me. “Leave me alone Brian.”

“Is Brian with you?”

“Yes, Nick. Just get here quick.” I ended the call.

“Why are you crying? I thought you would be happy that I love you.” Brian attempted to hug me.

“Don’t touch me. I want you to leave me alone.” I yelled through my tears.

“I can’t win with you. You’re in love with me, yet you don’t believe it when I say it.”

“I just find it funny that you would pick today to announce this. You haven’t shown me once since you’ve been in Kentucky that you love me. Then today you’re like I love you. I’m sorry if I don’t believe you.” I started to walk away from him.

“I just fucking realized it. Do think this is easy on me? No matter what I do, it’s wrong. Why do you run every time something is hard?”

“Brian, you’ve hurt me. I don’t trust you.”

The next thing I know Brian pulled me into his arms and kissed me hard on the lips. His tongue quickly entered my mouth. I got lost in his kiss, until I heard a car pull up next to us. I pushed Brian away.

“Don’t ever kiss me again Brian. I’m done with you for now. We are Shane’s parents, but that’s where our relationship ends. I will get along for the sake of our son, but I can’t be anything else. I’m sorry.”

I opened the door and slid into Nick’s car. He pulled out of the parking lot. My heart was shattered.