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Chapter Twenty-Six
Point of View: Narrator


Nick was sitting on the couch with a bowl of cereal balanced on his palm, spooning Cinnamon Toast Crunch flakes into his mouth as he watched highlights from some game on the TV. He'd started out with his legs crossed yoga-style, but as the highlights got exciting, he'd slowly raised up and up until now he was kneeling on the couch, clutching the bowl, shoveling the food, milk dripping down his chin onto the chest of his mangy-looking t-shirt. "Go!" he wailed at the player, who was trying desperately to catch the ball flying through the air over his head, "GOOOOOOOOOO!! MOVE YOU BASTARD!!!" In his momentum, he nearly fell off the couch, only just catching himself, and, unable to catch the bowl, watched as the milk and cereal exploded like a firework across the coffee table and shards of bowl went flying every which way.

"Crap," he groaned. He flipped himself over the back of the sofa, so he wouldn't step on any of the glass that was now residing in his carpet, and headed out to the kitchen.

Krystal was still out there. She was sitting at the kitchen table, poking through the newspaper. She looked up as Nick came in the room and started rooting around in the cabinet under the sink. He pulled out a bottle of Windex and a tub of AJAX. He turned them over in his palms and looked down at the labels. "What are you doing?" she asked.

"Which one of these is better to clean a carpet with?" he asked, holding them up for her to see.

Krystal stared at him a moment, trying to decide if he was serious or not, and finally decided he probably was. Nick didn't seem like the type to randomly joke about cleaning products. "Um... neither..." she said slowly. She hesitated. "What exactly happened?"

Nick hesitated back. He rubbed his nose. "I uh-" a soft clicking of claws on tile made him look down. His pug, Houston, was standing at his feet. "Houston knocked over my cereal bowl," he said. The dog can't get yelled at for making the mess, he thought, feeling a little guilty for throwing the dog under the bus.

Krystal sighed, "You shouldn't let her on the coffee table."

This was probably true, Nick couldn't really argue. "My bad," he answered. He ducked back under the sink. His voice came out muffled, "So what one of these thingies under here is good for the carpet thing?" he called.

Krystal thought a moment, "I dunno... A carpet cleaner?"

"Pinesol?"

"No."

Nick straightened up. "Are you sure the Windex won't work?" he asked, holding it up again, "It says all surfaces..."

"They mean table tops and windows," Krystal replied. She got up and made her way over and, pushing Nick out of the way, knelt down and started looking at all his cleaning supplies. Nick, meanwhile, looked at her ass.

The door bell rang.

"Ding dong, the witch is dead," sang Nick, "Gotta get the bell baby, be right back." He bounded away, out the kitchen, followed by the obese pug. Krystal kept rummaging through the space under the counter.

Nick whipped open the front door to his house, "Heyo, welcome to CarterWorld, home of the Carter Mc--" he stopped midword. Standing on the steps was a police officer. "Um, hi, --" Nick paused awkwardly, "Sir," he added.

"Good morning," the cop replied, voice low.

Nick wasn't sure what it meant when a policeman visited your house at random, so he wasn't entirely sure what to feel. He backed up, opening the door wider, "Um, come in..." he mumbled, unsure if that was even the right thing to do.

The officer pulled off his midnight blue cop-hat and tucked it under his arm. He stepped inside, rubbing his boots on the welcome mat before stepping in any further. He paused in the foyer as Nick closed the door. He pointed to Nick's wrist, "That's a nice watch," he commented.

Nick smiled, "My girlfriend gave it to me."

"When?" the cop asked.



Krystal was just backing out of the cupboard when she heard footsteps enter the kitchen. "I found some in the way back of the cabinet," she was saying, "I don't think this stuff expires, I mean it's cleaning chemicals, what could really --" she looked up.

Nick's face was somberly blank. A uniformed officer stood behind him.

Krystal put the bottle of carpet cleaner down on the counter. She swallowed. "Good morning," she whispered, hardly able to speak.

"Krys..." Nick said quietly, "What'd you do?"