"Nick Carter?"
I nodded. I stared out at the two officers standing outside my bashed in front door. I knew exactly why they were here.
It still didn't make it any easier.
"We wanted to follow up on your call early this morning about the break-in at your house and your girlfriend's disappearance."
"Did you find her?" I asked. My voice tightened.
The older of the two officers stepped forward. As was probably routine, he took off his hat, his face framed in sympathy.
"I'm sorry to tell you this, son, but she was found dead this morning."
I knew it. I was there. But to hear the words---
I sank to the floor and began to cry all over again.
"You mentioned in your call that she was pregnant?"
I nodded.
"A baby was found at the scene. Alive."
"Alive?" I whispered. Thank you.
"Crime lab is still working on everything, but it appears that she might have been abducted from the house and taken into an alley where the attacker tried to remove the child."
I blanched. "Why?" I whispered.
"Child abduction ring."
"But how--"
I was playing along with their story. It seemed better than the truth. My cheeks felt raw from the endless tears that had poured out of my eyes.
"There was signs of an animal attack. A coyote perhaps."
"Coyote?"
"We usually require a body identification, but...we were able to match Lauren's fingerprints."
I nodded absently. The officer knelt down and touched my shoulder.
"The baby was taken to the hospital."
"Which hospital?"
"Mr. Carter, I'm so sorry for your loss."
The nurse walked beside me, her soft shoes making no noise at all. "The baby looks about full term. He suffered some minor scratches..."
We rounded the corner. The room was small. A nurse hovered over the bassinet. She looked up; her eyes filled with sympathy.
"I'm so sorry to hear about your girlfriend."
My eyes didn't stray from the bassinet. I leaned over looking at the baby I had ripped from his mother's womb just this morning. His arms and face were covered from light scratches.
Scratches his siblings had probably given him. I leaned down and stroked his face.
"Do you want a few moments?"
I nodded. "Yes please," I said quietly.
Both nurses left the room. I scooped the baby out of the bassinet.
"What a night," I said softly. I sank into the rocking chair and stared down at him.
The baby's hair was dark; the same color as Lauren's. His eyes looked up at me in confusion.
I didn't know what I was going to do. I couldn't take care of a baby alone. Lauren and I hadn't asked for any of this to happen.
This baby didn't ask for any of this.
"How did this happen?"
"We didn't find out until recently. Lauren had been on bed rest. We were going to tell everyone after..."
"I'm so sorry."
It was the line of the day. I stared at Brian; my eyes had no more tears to give. I had shed the last when Lauren's mom had come up to the hospital.
"Have you given him a name?"
"No. I...I don't think I can do this."
"Of course you can. Lauren would have wanted you to."
I knew he was right. Lauren's last request was for me to deliver the babies. She would never have forgiven me.
"Bri, you know me. I'm not mature enough."
"Seems to me you've matured a lot lately."
I didn't know if it was so much maturity as it terror, anger, and anguish. I let my head fall back against the rocker pad. I swallowed hard.
"Leighanne and I will be more than happy to help you," Bri continued. "I didn't know squat either before we had Bay."
"Yeah, but your squat tends to be better than my squat."
Bri snorted. "Naw. I have a feeling your gonna de-squat fast."
I laughed. For just a split second it felt like old times. We had started off having a serious conversation only to end with utter nonsense. I stared back down at the baby.
"Do you like the name Riley?"
"Are you asking me or the baby? 'Cause babies can't talk Nick."
"Shut up. I know that."
"Okay, well in that case it sounds like Baylee."
I gave him a dirty look. Bri held up his hands. He was wearing a bright pink Wylee shirt that was hurting my eyes. "What?"
"Okay. What about Camden?"
"Camden? Where in the world did that come from?"
"Where in the world did Baylee come from?"
"It's a normal name!"
"Not the way you spell it!"
"We wanted to be original."
"And?"
"Camden's good," Bri said quickly. "Are you going to think of a middle name?"
"Another name? Jesus."
"Well all you get is one out of three. Didn't you and Lauren--"
I winced. Bri lowered his head. "Sorry. I shouldn't have--"
"She liked Tyler," I said.
"Okay. So Camden Tyler Carter. That's got a nice ring."
At that moment, Camden yawned. I touched his hand.
I was really going to do this.
"It's just you and me, Cam."
The viewing was closed casket. A beautiful picture of Lauren in a gold gilt frame adorned a shimmering white casket. It looked like a pearl.
The room was packed. Besides the guys and Lauren's parents, I couldn't tell you who was there. I longed to see her face one last time. Obviously my suspicion that night had been correct. Come morning, she had still transformed back into her human form.
I clung to Camden like my life depended on it. He was a spectacle in and of itself. People couldn't believe that Lauren had been pregnant. They had seen her just two...three months before. How could this beautiful baby boy be resting comfortably in my arms?
AJ had come up with my best excuse. I had never pictured him as the type, but obviously he watched a LOT of TLC. His theory was that Lauren had been a prime candidate for the show 'I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant.'
Maybe she could have been. If she had lived long enough. I could barely look at Howie.
He was the one that had kept me late. If I had just left...
Lauren would still be alive.
There were moments when I could completely function if I just threw myself into the daily duties of taking care of Camden. The nights were the hardest. My sleep was plagued with nightmares replaying the whole scene. I kept waking up in cold sweats.
Time was malicious. I was angry at the world. I had to find a way to fix myself. I knew I could depend on Bri and Leigh to watch Camden during the next moon and probably the ones that followed.
But I didn't want to go through life like this. I was a monster.
There had to be a fix.
