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Chapter Four - Cast a Line

"You really don't have to do this," I said. For such a large guy, Tito walked fast. He was carrying a tackle box that was practically three feet long. He turned and smiled at me. If I had to peg his nationality, I would have guessed Samoan.

"You want your boat fixed?"

"Yes."

"Then I'm your guy."

"But the kitchen..."

"Rosie can handle it."

"She can cook?"

"One-armed and all."

We slowed as we neared the harbor. I walked ahead, leading the way to my dysfunctional boat.

"Did she really break her arm fishing?"

"Nothing but the truth. She's one helluva fisher. This your boat?"

I nodded. Tito knelt down next to the damaged panel. I stared down into the water. As Tito mumbled to himself my mind went back. way back. Back to the early days of me and her...

"You need a REAL man to teach you how to fish," I teased. Lauren's eyes sparkled as she ran her hand up and down the fishing rod.

"Oh really?"

I stood behind her, my arms eagerly sliding around her. We were on her daddy's huge ass boat. I was almost afraid that the line wouldn't reach the water. My fingers stroked the inside of her wrist. I momentarily forgot what we were doing.

"Nick?" she murmured.

"Yeah?"

She laughed. It was the best laugh I had ever heard in my entire life. "Get outta my way."

She wiggled away from me and I stood there dumbfounded as she cast her line like a pro. Her hip pressed against the rail and my pride was healed a little by my renewed focus on her denim short shorts.

"You've done this before?" I guessed. She looked towards me; the wind picked up her hair and tossed it around in waves.

"I've been fishing since I was three years old," she said. I stood beside her and tossed my line.

"You must think I'm a little pigheaded, huh?"

"Pigheaded?" she repeated. "No, you're just a guy." I saw her check me out. "And a really gorgeous one at that."

I hadn't wanted the day to end. Lauren caught a huge fish and we pressed close together. Lauren was smiling with pride; I was just smiling with happiness.

Happiness. It was such a foreign thing to me now. Happiness was lowered into the ground with Lauren's casket. Happiness faded the instant the dark red rose that fell from my fingers hit the polished mahogany lid and I crashed to the ground.

"Hello? Can you hear me?"

A brown hand waved in front of my face. I started. Tito was staring at me, his face showing his concern.

"I've been talking to you for five minutes. Where were you?"

"I'm sorry," I said quickly. "It's just been a stressful day."

Tito smiled. "It's barely noon, bro."

The sun was beating down through my hair, warming my neck. I ran a hand down my throat. "What's the damage?"

"Well, I've mostly got bad news. Joshua knows how to screw things up really bad. He not only took some of the bolts and cut two of the main wire, he also took a fuse. I can repair the wires and replace the bolts but I've got to order out for the fuse."

"Are you telling me there's no place around here that would have one dinky fuse?"

"They don't make this model boat no more," Tito explained. "All parts are pretty much special order."

I scowled. "How long will that take?"

"If I rush it? Let's see...what's today?"

"Tuesday."

"It'll be here Friday morning."

"Friday morning?" I said. My head began to pound. "Can I rent another boat and leave this one here until it's fixed?"

"You can try, but it's peak season. My buddy Bob down at the rental said they were all out for the week."

"Damnit," I scowled. Tito looked sympathetic. "Where you headed bro?"

I stared at him blankly. I didn't have a destination. "Nowhere," I said.

He looked at me thoughtfully. "You've come to the right place. You stay on your boat and no one will bother you. You come to my restaurant for food and Friday you can keep going nowhere."

I shook my head. I ran my dirty sneaker along the edge of the dock. "I don't have a choice, do I?"

Tito's dimple reappeared. "Naw, but I'm trying to be positive. Looks like you can use some of that right now."

I flinched. Our interaction needed to be over. I held out my hand. "Alright, thank you for your help."

Tito's handshake was bone-crushing. "If you need anything, I live right in back of the restaurant."

"Thanks," I said. I knew even if I did need help I wouldn't seek him out.

As I climbed aboard the boat, Tito put a dozen or so tools back into his large toolbox. He hoisted it on his shoulder and took back off in the direction of the restaurant.

I lifted the hatch and pulled out a folding chair. I set it up and headed below; I chose a book I knew I would never begin reading and made my way back up. I settled myself in the chair, opened the cover of the old Steven King title and tried to lose myself in thought.

Unfortunately, that was easier said than done. It was a gorgeous day. On either side of me, people were preparing their boats for a day out on the wide open sea. A couple girls in skimpy bikinis hung over the railing of the boat to my left. They began a constant barage of giggling and, I daresay, did their damndest to get my attention. They didn't succeed. I turned a page, coughed, and narrowed my eyes for emphasis. After awhile, one of the more daring girls flashed me, but getting no response, they soon started the boat and sailed away.

On the other side of me, I saw a dad holding his little boy up and letting him turn the wheel. This disturbed me more than the girls. I let out a shuddery breath and turned another unread page with shaking fingers, the little boys' laughter stinging my ears.

Once upon a time, I had seen my child's heartbeat.

The moment her heart ceased to beat, so did its.

I would never know if I had been destined to have a son or daughter.

Destiny took it all away.