After rehearsing, Julie headed to the room, with all intentions of getting ready for the PDA Pajama Party. She pulled out her ALL ACCESS pass so she could get past the security and to her room. She hadn’t heard from AJ and thought he must have been off doing something with the rest of the guys, except Nick. She knew he was busy.
Julie had just gotten to her cabin and was in the process of opening the door, when another door, a few cabins down, opened as well.

“Hey, sexy. You got plans tonight?” His deep voice resonated through her. She felt like she hadn’t seen him in weeks. She slowly turned around, trying hard not to smile.
“Why, yes. I do have plans tonight. I am going to be in my pajamas, surrounded by half naked, drunk women. Every man’s fantasy.” She took a step towards him, smiling wickedly at him. He took a step towards her, smiling in return.
“Not my fantasy. I don’t need anyone but you.”
They had stepped closer, almost touching each other at that point.
“Are you sure? There are some very beautiful women here and lots of bare skin.”
He took another step closer, closing the distance between them. His arms went around her, pulling her so close to him. His lips were just a breath away from hers.
“They may be beautiful, but they are not Unmistakable.”
Julie kissed him deeply. He always knew when to say the right things. Her hands went to his shaved head, running her fingertips over the bare skin.

They were deep in their kiss when Julie heard the security guy try to explain to a group of girls that the area was secure and only ALL ACCESS passes would get them in. Julie broke their kiss and looked over his shoulder at the group. She didn’t recognize any of them. But one girl looked right at her. Julie knew if looks could kill she'd be dead. She couldn't believe the look of hatred on the girl's face.

“Um, honey, I think we should get out of the hallway.” Julie slightly jerked her chin to indicate what was behind him. As soon as he looked over, the girls realized who Julie had been kissing. They all started calling to him, their individual words all jumbled together, except one girl with long dark hair. She turned around so only the back of her head was visible.

Julie grabbed his hand and pulled him to her door. She didn’t want them to know for sure where he was staying, even though it was only a few doors away; she wanted to throw them off. As soon as they were in her room, AJ burst out laughing. Julie, on the other hand, was a little worried. She didn’t need word to get out that she had been seen kissing him.
She went and sat on the edge of the bed and took a deep breath. She looked up at him and smiled. He didn’t need to know what was on her mind. He had enough going on. She did not want to add worry to it.

He stepped up to her, stepping in between her knees. His hands went into her hair, being mindful of her stitches. He kissed her forehead before looking into her eyes.
“How is your head? Have you been taking your pills?” Julie smiled at his concern.
“Yes, I have been taking my pills. No, my head doesn’t hurt, much.”
He didn’t miss the ‘much’. He kissed her on each temple, then moved down her face to kiss her lips with a great tenderness.
“Do you know what is the best way to get rid of a headache?” he teased.
“Tylenol?” she teased back.
“Sex. With your favorite Backstreet Boy.”
Julie whole face changed before AJ's eyes. She pushed him away and stood up. He had said the wrong words, used the wrong tone in his voice. He was being AJ and all she wanted right then was Alex. The worst part was, he didn’t even realize what he had done. A knot was building in her stomach and she didn’t know why.
“You probably should go. I need to get ready and I am sure they need all the Backstreet Boys at the PDA party on time.”
She intentionally said BSB instead of using his name. Julie stepped up to the door and opened it. She stood there, holding the door open, waiting for him to exit. As he walked past, he leaned in to kiss her. Julie turned her head right as his lips would have met hers and his kiss went to her cheek. He was baffled, What had just happened?

“So, I will see you at the party. Mickey Mouse, right?”
Julie just nodded and closed the door. As soon as she heard it click, she leaned her forehead against the cold door. Her head was seriously hurting now. She stood there for a moment, trying not to cry. And she didn’t know why she was feeling that way.
She finally pushed herself away from the door and went to the bathroom. She piled all her hair into a bun and put on the shower cap she found on the tray with the soaps and shampoos. As she stood in the hot shower, Julie began to cry. At first it was just little tears that fell, but soon enough, she was sobbing. Her body shook with violence as she bawled. And she didn’t even know why she was crying. But the harder she tried to stop, the more she sobbed.

When her hands and feet were all pruney, she finally stepped out. Julie used a cloth to wipe at the moisture on the mirror. She wasn’t overly surprised when she saw her face was red and puffy. And she thought she had had a headache before. She picked up the bottle of pain meds and quickly took one.

When Julie stepped back into the main room of the cabin, she picked up her cell phone to turn on some music, hoping it would put her in a better mood. But as soon as she lit up the screen, she saw she had a few messages from Kate.

KATE: Where are you rehearsing at? I am ready to join you.
KATE: Hello…
KATE: What is going on? Alex just sent a text to Nick wanting to know if I knew what was up with you.
KATE: Julie! Quit ignoring me! What is wrong?

Julie sent Kate a short text, simply letting her know she was in the room and had been in the shower. She went to her suitcase and looked inside. If AJ wanted a BSB fan tonight, she would let him have one. She picked up her Mickey Mouse pj’s and threw them across the room. They fell in a small heap by the chair.

She pulled out a matching bra and panty set she had brought for Prom Night. It was a navy bra, with a little push up and bikini panties. Both had a hint of lace at the edges. Her shoes for her prom dress even matched her undies. It was pure luck that her satin slip and robe that she had worn the night she gave Alex her virginity, matched her undies. She left the slip in the suitcase and just grabbed her robe. She went to the bathroom and plugged in her curlers. She had just gotten dressed in her undies and robe when Kate came in. Nick was right behind her.

When he saw what she was, or more to the point, wasn’t wearing, he excused himself to let them get ready. He kissed Kate and told her he'd see her later.

Julie went right into the bathroom, basically avoiding Kate. She worked on getting her make up done and her hair rolled. Having known Julie for so long, Kate let her finish getting ready. She knew when Julie was ready to talk, she would. Kate went to her suitcase and got out her things. She laid them out on the bed and turned to Julie. She was standing in the doorway to the bathroom. Kate could tell by the look in her eyes that Julie was on the verge of tears.

“Jewels? Why are you not in your Mickey Mouse pj’s? I thought you wanted to be different, so AJ could find you,” Kate inquired when she noticed the pile of red and black fabric by the chair.

Julie bit her lower lip, trying not to cry.

“Not to be TMI but Alex hasn’t been with me since we were back at his place. And then, tonight, he wasn’t my Alex. He was the bad boy AJ.” Julie went on to tell Kate what had happened. Kate tried not to laugh. She was the hormonal one, yet Julie was a mess.
"Well, it's not like you've had a lot of time with him," Kate stated. "Nick and I haven't done anything since the hotel."
Julie flopped down on the side of the bed.
"I didn't even get any at the hotel." She whined.
Kate smiled at her friend; apparently she forgot a few details.
"Jewels, the night in the hotel, you had just gotten out of the hospital and were doped up on pain meds."
"Oh, yeah," Julie said sadly.
“But that doesn’t explain why the Mickey jammies are in a pile in the corner,” Kate pointed out.
“Sure it does. If he wants a fan, then I will be one tonight. I am gonna walk out there dressed like every other skanky ho.”

Kate shook her head in disapproval. But she knew she couldn't talk Julie out of it. She went and picked up Julie’s Mickey jammies and laid them on the bed. She knew Julie would be back for them before the night was over.

Kate asked about how rehearsals went, to get Julie to talk about anything and get her mind off her emotions. She picked the right topic. Julie went on about how well everyone did and how she really hoped they got to move on, just to show off their dance moves. Julie told Kate how they had agreed to all be together when the announcement was made. If they didn’t go on to the next level, it was alright. At least they had had fun and made new friends in the process.

As Julie piled all her curls up, to keep her neck free and hide her little bald spot, Kate finished her make up. Julie sent a text to Tessa, telling her to meet them by the main staircase so they could all walk in together.


Tessa and Lauren stood at the base of the elegant staircase. Tessa’s long black hair shone in the light. She had on a floor length red slip with a sheer red robe over it. Lauren had on a light pink baby doll style dress with bloomers and heels with faux fur across the toes. They both smiled big when the Julie and Kate walked up to them.
“So, we ready to do this?” Lauren asked.
“Do what?” Tessa said, a little confused.
They all laughed at her comment.
“Go to the PDA party, silly” Lauren said to Tessa. Tessa blushed bright red.
They all walked up the staircase and into the grand ballroom together. The room had been transformed into a huge slumber party. All the tables and chairs had been removed. In their place were couches, bean bag chairs and sleeping bags spread out on the floor.
Due to the fact they were in their jammies, the girls had left their cellphones in their rooms. Julie had two small pockets on her robe, so she had both her and Kate’s ALL ACCESS lanyards in them.

The party was already in full swing. All four guys were up on the stage, dancing to the music, having a good time. Kate caught sight of Leighanne and Howie’s wife, sitting at one of the many couches on the stage, behind the guys. They had also seen Kate and Julie joining the party. Leighanne waved to them.

Julie looked around at the sea of girls. She had been right, so many of them were dressed in very little. She saw a lot of red and black and white, but not a single other girl in navy.

They made their way through the crowds. Tessa and Lauren both decided they needed a drink. Julie hated to admit it, but she really wanted one as well. They were surprised to find a low table with two arm chairs still empty. Julie insisted that Kate sit down and she would go get her a virgin drink.

When she reached the bar, Julie’s self-control had left. She ordered a shot of tequila. It was down her throat before the other two girls had even decided what to drink. Julie ordered Kate a virgin pina colada and a normal one for herself. By the time they had made their way back to the table, the tequila had warmed Julie.

Julie handed Kate her drink, then took a long pull from her own. Kate looked at her, a little concerned. She could tell Julie had had alcohol. Her cheeks were already turning pink. She hadn’t had any liquor in months so anything she consumed would hit her fast.

The DJ was spinning tunes and Julie decided she needed to dance. Kate didn’t want to lose the table and Lauren wasn’t in the mood to dance, so Tessa followed Julie to the area where people were dancing. The tequila was kicking in and Julie felt herself lighten up. She was letting her body feel the music, her eyes were closed and she moved with the beat. Little did she know a set of dark eyes were watching her.

Julie and Tessa returned to the table a while later. Julie picked up her pina colada and finished it quickly. The DJ stopped playing so the guys could perform a few songs. They chose to sing a few of the unreleased songs. They started with ‘Dance (Set It Off)’. As soon as they started, Julie grabbed Tessa’s hand and pulled her into the thick of the crowd. She jumped up and down, acting like any of the wild and crazy fan girls.

Since Tessa didn’t know Julie was dating AJ, and her liquor was kicking in, she tried to get them closer to the stage. There was still a large crowd in front the two girls. They had started a new song. ‘Sick As My Secret’, another unreleased song. Julie found a small break in the crowd and pulled Tessa through. There were only a few girls in front of them, but they were on the far right side of the stage.

Howie happened be on their side for his solo and when looking into the crowd, caught sight of Julie. His eyes were huge when he saw what little she was wearing. Her robe had come untied when they worked their way through the crowd. He could tell she only had on her bra and panties.

Before he could get to AJ and point her out, the song had ended and ‘PDA’ had started. They were only set to sing the three songs before getting another break. He had every intention of letting AJ know where Julie was when the song was over, but things didn’t work out that way.

AJ had yet to see Julie and was disappointed as they had started their set. He had hoped she would get close to the stage so he could sing to her. But by the time they started ‘PDA’, he still hadn’t been able to locate her. He scanned the crowd, looking for the Mickey Mouse pajamas that should stand out in a sea of scantily clad women.

When he got to the bridge of the song, he needed someone to sing to. A pretty redhead was in front of him, up against the stage, smiling his way. He stepped to the very edge of the stage and sang to her.

From the lobby to the patio
And we’re so compatible
From the Starbucks to the Navo
And we’re so compatible

Julie watched as he took the hand of a beautiful girl and sang to her. He kissed her knuckles when his part was done. He stood back up and winked at her before getting back to the choreography.

Her insecurities kicked in full force. Why would he want her when he could have any girl on the boat? Surely many of them had way more experience and could please him better. And far too many were better looking than her. Without thinking of Tessa, she pivoted and pushed her way through the crowd, headed straight for the bar.

It was then that AJ was able to see her. He couldn’t miss the rush of navy as she moved away from the crowd, bursting out of a group of girls. It was her hair, falling from it pins, that let him know it her. No one else had hair the same chestnut color as Julie. The way the light hit it just right let him know it was her.

His eyes stayed on her as he continued to finish the song and she stepped up to the bar. But he actually missed a step as he watched her take a shot of a gold substance. He could only guess it was tequila. A knot formed in his stomach. Maybe it was because he sang to the redhead. Hadn’t Julie asked him to flirt with the girls? She knew he loved her, didn’t she?

As soon as their set was over and the DJ began to spin tunes again, AJ got a bodyguard and headed for Julie. He didn’t care what happened. He knew he needed to get to her.

Two more shots later, Julie was about to order another when someone tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around to come face to face with the girl she had seen in the hall when she had been kissing AJ, the girl who had turned her back when AJ had looked her way. The girl gave Julie a hard shove. Julie wasn’t going to have any of that. She stood her ground. All she wanted to do was shove her back, but what good would that do?
“What the hell is your problem?” Julie yelled at her.
“Who do you think you are, kissing AJ,” the girl yelled back.
Julie just laughed.
“A little jealous, are we?” Julie said, the tequila fuelling her bravery.
The girl looked her up and down, a look of disgust on her face.
“Jealous? Hardly. Look at you. You are nothing but a skanky ho.”
Julie laughed again.
“Oh, yeah. You are so jealous. Should I tell you how soft his lips are, or how strong his arms are? Or maybe how he would never want you?”

Julie had said the wrong thing. The girl was seeing red. What Julie thought was jealousy on the girl’s face was quickly becoming rage. She pulled her fist back, as if she was going to punch Julie. But Julie saw it coming and ducked as the girl’s hand swung at her. Julie had done enough dirty dancing to easily go low. The girl lost her balance and fell. Julie stood back up and laughed before she turned back to the bar.

In the commotion, the girls around had not seen that AJ and his guard were now behind the bar, about to pass out free shots. Julie was shocked when their eyes met. But not as shocked as he was when he saw her opened robe and her heaving breasts. Julie leaned up against the bar, her breasts almost resting on the edge. She looked into his deep brown eyes. But she was drunk enough that she didn’t see the hurt reflecting there.

“I’ll take one of those shots. And by the way, I am your biggest fan,” Julie said in a sing song voice.
AJ just shook his head before he leaned in close to her, his elbows on the bar. He didn’t care if anyone heard him, but he still spoke as quietly as he could.
“Baby? Why are you doing this?”
Julie stood up straight.
“But I thought this was what you wanted? A fan girl.”
He shook his head. The girls around were pushing their way up to him, reaching and screaming for a free shot from him, even though he had yet to pass a single one out.
“No. This is what you wanted. You told me to be AJ this weekend. So I am. What is your excuse?”

His words hit her in the face. He was right. She was the one being stupid and cruel. She took a step back, almost tripping on the girl behind her. His attention had been pulled away so he was no longer looking at her.
Julie pushed her way past everyone and began running out of the ballroom, tears streaming down her face. She had been so wrong about everything. She had no reason to be upset, but AJ had every reason. Would he ever forgive her for what she had done?

Kate had seen Julie head back to the bar. She excused herself from Lauren and started making her way towards the bar. She had seen the girls try to attack Julie and was surprised that Julie didn't strike back. But Kate knew the real trouble was the confrontation with Alex. She had watched his expression as Julie played the tramp.
Julie stopped at the doorway of the ballroom and took off her heels before running down the hall.
Kate made her way to the bar with great care and great skill. When AJ saw her, he went right over to her and leaned close to hear her.
"I'll talk to her," Kate said.
He covered her hand with his.
"Please don't," he said shrugging. "She's drunk."
"That's no reason for her to treat you that way."
He sighed. "Thanks. Don't worry. I'll talk to her when she sobers up."
Kate's heart broke for him as she watched him go back to treating his fans. He was a good actor. All the girls surrounding him would never know his heart was breaking.