Chapter 5

            I have Christmas with my family. Sophia keeps trying to get me to talk but I can't. I love my sister but I have to deal with this on my own. After the New Year, I throw myself into my work. I avoid any and all news reports about AJ. I even avoid Twitter. Why? I don't want to see or hear about them making up and re-planning the wedding.

            When AJ's birthday rolls around, I really tie one on. I go out with friends and get so blitzed, they put me up in a hotel for the night. When I wake up, I realize I'm killing myself slowly by torturing myself about AJ. I clean up and make the decision to move on with my life.

            When I get to my house, I'm shocked to find a limo sitting in the parking lot. That's not something you see every day. I get to my apartment to find AJ sitting on the floor by the door. He sees me and stands up, saying, "Where the hell have you been? I've been worried sick!"

            I push past him and unlock the door. I say, "I was out. Why are you here?"

            He says, "We always go out on my birthday. Always."

            I turn to face him and say, "I'm sorry AJ. I figured you would be with Ro so I went out for drinks with Gracie and the girls."

            He says, "It's ok. It's not like I called and told you I'd be here. I just thought..."

            Changing the subject, I say, "How's Ro?"

            As I'm searching through my purse for something to kill this raging headache, he says, "I don't know. We aren't together."

            I straighten up and look at him and say, "I'm sorry AJ."

            I go into the kitchen and he follows me. He says, "Don't be. She was right. We just weren't working. I was too upset to see it."

            Before I can say anything, my phone rings. I grab it on the second ring. What I hear on the other end of the line makes me sink further into my depression. When I hang up, AJ says, "What's wrong?"

            I sniff and say, "It's official. I lost my job."

            I go into the bedroom and fall over on the bed, crying. He comes in and wraps his arms around me and holds me. I can't believe what's happening to me. First I lost him, now my job. What's next?

            He hugs me tight and says, "Come on, let's go get some breakfast, Sweetheart."

            I say, "I'm sorry AJ I don't think my stomach will accept food."

            He laughs and says, "You really got hammered, huh?" When I nod, he says, "Come on, we'll go for a walk."

            And thus, our friendship is renewed. By the time he leaves that day, I'm secure in the knowledge that he and Ro are really over and he's picking up the pieces. We didn't make love. Somehow, I don't think either of us were ready for it.

            The next few weeks we fall back into our routines, only I'm looking for a job. Thankfully, I found one rather quickly, but the pay isn't quite as good as what I had before. As I contemplate moving to a smaller apartment with lower rent, AJ calls me and says, "You busy Tuesday night?"

            I say, "No, why?"

            He says, "I want to take you out for dinner. OK?"

            I say, "Sure, sounds great. Why Tuesday?"

            He chuckles and says, "Silly girl, it's Valentine's Day."

            Before I can object, he hangs up. I sit and stare at my phone like it's going to explain this to me because I sure don't understand. He wants to take me out for Valentine's Day? Really?

            When Tuesday comes around, I leave work early, not really enjoying losing the hours, but I have to have time to prepare. AJ's picking me up at 6:15. By 4:30, I've showered and shaved. Yes, I shaved everything. Even though we haven't made love again, a girl can dream, right?

            By 6:00, I'm dressed and ready. Slinky black dress with a handkerchief hem and spaghetti straps, thigh high stockings and stilettos complete the ensemble. I have a black wrap on the back of the couch and when the door bell rings, I think I'm ready.

Until I open the door and see AJ standing there in a black suit and tie looking sexy as hell. He looks me up and down and says, "Baby, you look amazing."

I smile and say, "I can't believe you asked me out for Valentine's Day."

He picks up my wrap and settles it over my shoulders before saying, "Why not? You're my favorite Valentine."

I smile at his corniness and he leads me out to the waiting town car. When we get to the restaurant, he ignores all questions from the paparazzi and leads me inside. When we are settled in our romantic, corner booth, he says, "I want to talk to you about something important."

I say, "OK. What's wrong?"

He orders a bottle of champagne then turns to me and says, "Nothing's wrong. I've done some soul searching and I want to tell you what I found."

After our champagne is poured, AJ scoots closer to me and says, "I missed you."

I say, "You did?"

He says, "I missed all of you, Celeste. I missed being with you and talking and laughing. Most of all...I missed loving you."

I say, "AJ, we both needed time."

He says, "I know. And in that time I figured some things out."

The waiter comes back and takes our order. After he leaves, I say, "What did you figure out?"

He smiles and says, "I'll tell you after dinner. I promise. For now, I have a present for you."

He takes out a long narrow box and says, "Happy Valentine's Day."

I shake my head and say, "AJ, what did you do?"

He smiles and says, "What I should have done a long time ago."

When I open the box, there's a delicate gold chain with a heart shaped pendant on it. I smile and say, "AJ, it's beautiful, thank you."

He puts it around my neck and says, "Perfect. I knew it would be."

Throughout dinner, we talk like we used to. Part of me wants to ask him about his revelations, but I'm enjoying just being with him so much, I can't. At the end of dinner, he asks, "How's the new job?"

I sigh and say, "I guess it's ok. It's kind of boring and doesn't pay enough. I'll be apartment hunting soon."

He takes my hand and says, "Not if I can help it. Come on, time for me to tell you what I figured out."

Once we're in the limo, he says, "I know why things didn't work with Ro."

I say, "Why?"

He says, "She and I weren't friends. We were everything but. What it all came down to was we didn't have enough in common to continue." Before I can say anything, he says, "Celeste, do you notice anything different about me?"

I look at him, completely confused, and then it dawns on me. I say, "You're not smoking?"

He smiles and says, "It's been 22 days."

I hug him and say, "I'm so proud of you. But why?"

Before he can answer, the car stops. We're at my apartment. We get out and he holds my hand as we walk to my door. Once inside, I say, "Why did you stop smoking, AJ?"

He holds my hands and looks deep into my eyes. He says, "I did it for you, Celeste."

After the initial shock of his words, I say, "Why?"

He says, "I had to prove to you I mean it."

I say, "Mean what, AJ?"

He says, "I love you Celeste. Throughout my crazy life, I have always loved you."

I can't help it. Tears start falling. He brushes them away and says, "I was so stupid. I couldn't see what I had right in front of my face. I'm supposed to be with you, Celeste. Nobody but you."

I have to giggle. He laughs and says, "Sweetheart, I'm so sorry for all the ways I hurt you. I love you."

I sigh and lean into him. After he kisses me gently, I say, "I love you too, AJ."

He holds me close and whispers, "I want to make love to you, Celeste."

I look up into his eyes and whisper, "I want that too."

He kisses me and then he says, "Just one more thing I have to ask you."

I say, "What's that?"

He drops down on one knee and says, "Will you marry me, Celeste?"