Chapter 8

After dinner, Nick excused himself to tuck Matty in for the night and make a few phone calls. JC led her to Nick’s private studio on the first floor of the house, just underneath JC’s floor.

So it turned out that the 2 floor beach house she was initially introduced to was actually a four-floor cliffside mansion that boasted a full on 3 bedroom suite for JC just below the main floor and a fully equipped recording studio on sea level (first floor) plus a massive rec room. JC explained that when Nick and Faith had renovated the property, they kept the first two original floors but enhanced it by adding the two cliffside floors below it, for extra space. The floor below was meant to be an in-law suite, for when their family visited, but since Faith’s death, JC decided to move in so he can be with his nephew.

“Nick’s studio is a bit of a shrine to my sister,” JC warned before opening the double doors to the studio. “Just a heads up.”

And it was. There were family photos on every wall surface of the room. And in each of them a beautiful blonde woman smiled brightly.

Tasha touched one of the photos next to the sound booth. “JC, she’s beautiful.”

JC smiled as he turned on various equipment. “Trust me, my mom waited until Faith was born to unleash all the Nordic genetics.” He pulled out a chair for her. “Sit, we have lots to talk about.”

She complied. “I had a quick question for you before we start.”

JC nodded, “Shoot.”

“When Nick said earlier that the showcase was dumb luck, what did he mean exactly? Am I not here for an audition?”

“Oh you are here for an audition. There will be four acts tomorrow, I’ve been working with the other three this past week. But because you were brought in last minute, it was lucky we could bring you down, and that you were available.”

“But the label will only sign one, right? One winner tomorrow?”

JC hesitated before answering. “That’s what everyone’s been told. And that’s what I’ve been asked to tell everyone.” He shrugged. “But in reality, all of you could come out with a record deal. Four of the Backstreet Boys have their own label, so one or all of them could sign you if they like you. Millennium Records is pretty much the big machine that takes care of publicity, distribution and song rights. The Boys’ individual labels take care of talent management and music production. So when Nick tells you that you’re in, he’s pretty much guaranteeing at the very least a contract with Kaotic, his label.”

“So what are we really fighting for tomorrow?”

“Pretty much a chance to put the full weight of Millennium in your next album and singles. They’re sponsoring the showcase tomorrow as well as all the prize money. If Kevin and the other Boys decide they like you, you’ll be hit with as much money as they can give you to make sure you’re the next big thing. And you can’t get that anywhere anymore.”

Tasha started cracking her knuckles when she realized how big this was. “Nick’s got a whole lot of faith in me, trusting me like this.”

JC smiled. “Well you can’t get nervous now! The work is just beginning!” He stood up and ushered her to the soundbooth and sat down on the piano bench. “How about we get started with your set list and work around that? Are you ready or do you need to warm up?”

Tasha nodded. “No, I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

For the next two hours, Tasha and JC worked on arranging and rearranging the three songs she’d be performing tomorrow night. Because Tasha had been working on her arrangements all week, she knew everything cold. JC didn’t think she was trying hard enough.

“AGAIN, Tasha. Open that note a little more, hold on to it for a few more beats.” He played the notes leading up to the bridge and stopped when she shook her head.

“I can’t…that’s a two octave transition, are you nuts?”

JC shook his head from his spot behind the piano across the room. “Not nuts. Professional pop music producer. Right here.” He grinned.

“JC, you’re lucky I can even do the transition at all. I need to breathe.”

“Baby, this is your finale. You need to make it spellbinding. That means you need to belt it. You can do it. One more time. From the beginning of the bridge. Let’s go.”

As soon as the notes started, she closed her eyes and breathed deeply.

If my body was on fire

You’d watch me burn down in flames

You said you loved me, you're a liar

'Cause you never, ever, ever did

She gasped the last word “baby” and clutched her stomach. “Jesus, JC.”

“JC, do you think you can give her a few beats before the second ‘ever’?” Nick’s voice came on the speakers, startling her and JC. They turned to the engineer booth just behind JC and saw Nick talking into the microphone.

“How long have you been there, Nick?” JC asked.

He looked at his watch. “A half hour maybe. You guys are doing great. But C, you’re killing Tasha’s pipes and it’s not even the showcase yet.”

JC stood up and put a finger up to Tasha. “Give us one minute, Tash. Take five. Have some of your tea.”

JC walked into the engineering booth and she saw the two of them talk with bowed heads. As she sipped her tea, she noticed JC shaking his head more times than Nick was nodding his. If this was a disagreement, she’d give anything to be a fly on THAT wall.

They didn’t even hear him come in. Had he really been listening in for the last half hour?

Her nervousness was back, she realized as she started absently biting her nails. For the last two hours, she was completely free and open with JC and now, after Nick walked in, it felt like she was back to feeling like a sixteen-year-old teenybopper again. Would it be possible that she was still self-conscious around him?

It was approximately eight minutes before both JC and Nick walked in the sound booth. Nick, dressed in only a black tank top and dark grey pajama bottoms, looked a lot more relaxed than JC.

“Sorry, Tash.” Nick smiled wanly. “I was just coming in to check in on you before bed and I was stuck on this song. I’m glad you’re choosing to perform Grenade tomorrow. Is there a reason why you’re performing it as a pop-jazz ballad instead of the original harder edge arrangement?”

JC spoke up. “I told you, it needed to work well with her two other songs. The original Bruno Mars arrangement was more…”

“Rocker soul?”

“I would describe it more as Pink meets Chaka Khan.” Tasha said.

JC nodded. “Nick wants to try the original arrangement with guitar so we can see if we can make it easier for you.”

Tasha agreed as Nick pulled up a stool and grabbed his guitar from the far wall. “Let’s do the short version. I’ll back you on the guitar but let’s change the key. Follow my lead, Tash. We’re channelling some of your Metal Gyros persona here.” He added with a smile. “Ready?”

As he started strumming, Tasha closed her eyes and tried to lose herself in the lyrics. It was a harder, heavier arrangement, but changing the key and having just guitar to back her up made it sound more raw, more emotional.

Because she was concentrating so hard, she missed a few of her lines and just before reaching the bridge, Nick asked her to stop.

“You’re overthinking this, Tasha.” Nick said. “How about we try this.” He stood up and walked over to where she was and stopped about two feet away from her microphone. “Look right at me while you sing. No closing your eyes, no looking down. Just straight at me.”

She tried not to let her panic show. “Uh. No blinking?”

He smiled slowly and it was as if her body melted into a puddle of teenybopper nerves. “You can blink. Once. I’ll even let two slide. Ready?”

Behind him, she saw JC’s mild annoyance turn into unmistakable interest at the turn of events.

As Nick played, she held his gaze, with difficulty at first. Soon enough, she started to sing almost from muscle memory.

It wasn’t hard staring at him while she sang. His eyes were so blue that she wanted to drown in them. She wondered as well how the hell he managed to stay awake this late at night and still so alert. Especially with a two year old boy.

She really needed to get over this weird infatuation with him. If she was going to let him manage her career, she needed to be able to have a conversation with him that didn’t involve her insides turning into mush after every second word.

Wait. Did she already make a decision? Did she really want this? A chance at achieving her dream? It felt so long ago that she wanted an actual career in music, a record deal, an actual opportunity to make it. And here it was, with Nick Carter handing her success on a silver platter.

It took her a minute to realize that he had actually stopped playing the guitar and that she was belting out the bridge like she was channelling every single emotion out of her exhausted body.

Her eyes widened as soon as the lyrics ended and pushed away from the microphone like it was possessed. “What the hell…”

Nick turned to JC. “Did you get that?”

JC nodded with a surprised look. “Jesus, bro, how did you know that was going to work?”

 Nick just shrugged and put his guitar back on its stand. “That sounded fantastic, Tash. We’ll unleash your inner rocker yet. I’ll leave you both for the night but don’t stay up too late, we all have an early start tomorrow.”

And just like that, he was gone.

Tasha still had no idea what just happened. She hadn’t been singing like that in years and all it took was for her to get out of her mind and let Nick take over her thoughts? Was that what it was?

“JC…”

JC was shaking his head laughing as he sat back down on the piano bench and made notes on some sheet music. “I know what you’re going to ask. And no, I don’t know what happened either but this jazz sound you have, that you came in with? I think the rocker chick in you just blew it out the water. We’re going to have to change the key of the other two songs, Tasha, and up the tempo a bit. Give me a minute. Do you… ”

She blinked and looked back at the door Nick exited from. As JC kept talking, Tasha touched the base of her throat and wondered what was it about him that made her sing like she hadn’t in years?

“Kevin calls him the song whisperer.” JC said, coming up next to her. “When they first started the company, everyone wanted to work with Nick, because he could make singers do things they didn’t think they could do themselves. He’s one of the best.”

“How does he do it?”

JC shrugged. “Nobody’s figured it out yet. Remember when Kelly Clarkson released ‘Since U Been Gone’ in 2005? That song was all Nick. The power, the voice, the anger. He helped unleash all of that. And Pink’s Whataya Want From Me, Justin’s Sexy Back? All Nick. His ear for music and his talent for producing hits made Millennium lots and lots of money. And Grammys.”

“It was almost like he got me out of my head and just feel.” Tasha ran her hands over her arms. “I still have goosebumps.”

JC smiled. “I know. You’ll get used to it. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing, right?”

“Is he…is he like this with all his artists?”

JC shook his head. “Only ones he feels passionate about. The last time that happened was when he was managing and producing Jenny Lewis. It was bananas. But he’s picky. And I haven’t seen him this focused on someone as he’s been with you, at least not since my sister died.” JC put an arm around Tasha and looked at her with seriousness. “I think you may just be the person to help him get back into the groove.”

Tasha didn’t know what to think of that last statement. As JC led her back to her microphone he said, “Come on, let’s get these changes done, with one run through and then you’ll need to get some rest. Oh, Nick and I were talking earlier too, how do you feel about being called ‘Tasha’, just ‘Tasha’, like Adele? I think it’s genius…”

Unintentionally, she tuned out JC and focused on the crazy feeling of butterflies coursing through her entire body. She was excited, she was really excited. She’d never felt this way about her voice, or music in general. After tonight, if what Nick had unleashed in her continued, she may actually get a shot at success.

And for the first time in 6 years, Tasha felt brave enough to take that chance.

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*Lyrics from “Grenade” by Bruno Mars