Big Girl Now

Chapter 10

Donnie’s Point View

 I was not in the mood to party tonight. No, I wasn’t sick. I just didn’t want to watch Jayson all over Marley. She deserved better than him. I sat at the bar watching everyone else. Marley and Jayson hadn’t arrived yet.

I turned toward the bar tender. “A Jameson and soda, please.”

As I waited for my drink, Marley arrived hand in hand with Jayson. I was surprised at what she was wearing. She had on dark jeans and a dark purple halter top with a shrug over top. Considering what she had planned to wear earlier she was covered up. Still she was gorgeous. I couldn’t stop staring.

Immediately they hit the dance floor. I took my drink and found a table in a dark corner. That way I could watch unnoticed. I was captivated by the way her body moved. She was beyond sexy.

What was I thinking? I shouldn’t be having these thoughts about her. I had known her for so long. Marley was a nice girl, but it wouldn’t work out between us. It was hard to see past the image in my head. I still remember giving Marley her first kiss at fourteen. It was an innocent kiss, but it left me reeling. I never did get it out of my system all these years.

“So, now you’re into stalking?” Joe said as him and Jon sat down.

“I’m not stalking. I just wanted some time alone.” I commented dryly. I wasn’t going to admit that I couldn’t take my eyes off her.

“You haven’t looked away from Mar since she walked in the room. I thought you only wanted to be friends. What gives?”  Jon gave me the big brother look. I knew I was in for a lecture before the night was over.

“We’re just friends. I made it perfectly clear to her last night.” I sighed. There was no way I could change my mind. I didn’t want to play games with Marley.

“It’s obvious to everyone that you want to be more than friends.” Joe pointed out.

“You need to get over the fact that Marley’s is all grown up. She’s not the teenager you left behind in Boston. She’s a woman.”

“You don’t understand.” I wasn’t sure I understood it myself.

“What’s there to understand except that you are a stubborn chicken shit when it comes to Marley?  She’s not going to wait around forever.”

“Yeah, I see she’s already moved on to Jayson,” I swallowed the last bit of my drink and slumped in my chair.

“Are you out of your ever loving mind? She only accepted this date to make you jealous. That’s why she was going to wear that sexy red dress tonight.” Jon looked at me like I had three heads. Was I really this dense when it came to Marley?

“Donnie, go talk to her. Tell her how you feel.” Joe encouraged me. I got off my ass and walked over to the bar where she was standing.

Why was I nervous all of a sudden? Women never hand me tongued tied with sweaty palms, but here I was with both.

“Can I buy you a drink?” I whispered in her ear.

“I guess. I mean if it’s okay for me to drink. I am over twenty-one.” She gave me a pointed look.

“Mar, I want to apologize to you. I’m sorry for the way I’ve been acting.”

“It’s fine. I get that you only see me as a friend. It’s cool.” She leaned against the bar.

Instead of telling her, I was going to show her that I wanted to be more than friends with her.  I closed the space between us. My hands moved to her hips. I saw her lick her lips. It was sexy. Before she could stop me, I placed my lips on hers. Marley deepened the kissing, sliding her tongue in my mouth. She wrapped her hands around my neck. We forgot where we were for a few minutes until I pulled back.

“Mar, I’m sorry I’ve been a jackass lately. I realize that you aren’t a teenager anymore. You’ve grown up, and I really like that.” I smiled at her.

“Donnie are you playing games with me just to get me in your bed? You run hot and cold. I don’t know what to believe.” She pushed me away slightly.

“So, I was stupid. Can’t a guy make a mistake?” I tried to lighten the mood.

“I guess so.” She grabbed my drink and chugged it. “It makes it hard for me to trust you. I’ve already fallen for you, but I can’t keep letting you play with my heart.”

“I’m trying not to hurt you. I’ve never been in a situation like this.”

“I find it funny that Mr. Cool doesn’t know how to handle a woman. You must be losing your touch.” She said with a grin.

“That’s so not funny.” I grabbed her hand, so she wouldn’t leave. “There’s something I need to tell you and it might change your mind.”

I was going to tell her the truth. She deserved to hear it. There was no going back after this. I hoped she would realize how much I did care for her.

“Oh really? Do tell.”

“Let’s go somewhere less noisy.” I led her outside the club. There was a bench on the street. We both sat down.

“So what is it you wanted to tell me?” She raised an eyebrow.

“Do you remember your first kiss?” I asked softly.

“Yes.”

“Mar, that kiss changed me. Sure, it was simple, but it left me feeling complete. It’s part of the reason I’ve never committed myself to one woman. I never felt what I did with you, with any other woman. It just took me all these years to finally realize what I was missing.” I spoke from my heart. The look on Marley face was shock. I wasn’t sure if she believed me.

“What are you trying to say?” She hesitated.

“I want to be with you.”

“Donnie, I like you. I’m attracted to you. Hell, I’ve had a crush on you since I was eleven.” She started to laugh. “I think we need to take things slow. Maybe start off by dating.”

“I think that sounds like a perfect idea.” I was content with taking things slowly. I wanted it to work out with Marley.