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Chapter Fifteen

Eddie grudgingly agreed that I shouldn't do the show that night, and trudged off the bus to go let the other guys know before announcing it to the fans. Anytime I skip a show poor Eddie gets thrown more shit than he really deserves for it. I mean, it's not Eddie's fault when I don't show up. But nonetheless, he was about to eat shit from pretty much every fan in that audience.

Since I wasn't gonna be doing the show, and there really was no completely inconspicuous/safe place to park the bus, Charley had them drive the bus to a hotel and I got a room for the evening. I was assigned two additional bodyguards, besides Charley, and once we'd gotten our room assignments, the guards stood on either end of the hallway, while Charley followed me into the room.

"I'm going to be sitting just outside the door," she was briefing me as I dropped my duffle bag onto the floor by the bed. "If you need anything, you just holler out. If I need something from you, I'll knock three times sharp and three times soft then once sharp, got it?"

"What?"

Charley knocked on the wall like she meant.

"Why?"

"So you know it's me."

"Of course it's you, you're the only person outside the door," I answered.

"Maybe." Charley shrugged. "Just wait for all the knocks, okay? And still look out the peep hole before answering."

I sighed, "I really don't think this guy's smart enough to figure out your secret code knock," I answered. But Charley gave me The Look so I quickly said, "But I'll definitely peep at you and only let in the right knockers." I grinned.

Charley rolled her eyes. "Get some rest. Your jokes are getting progressively worse." And with that, she took the chair from the desk and effortlessly moved it into the hall before closing the door behind her.

I sat down on the edge of the bed and looked around the room. It was a typical hotel room, with the ugly carpet patterns and the pastel sailboat painting over the king sized bed. It smelled a little of cigarette smoke, even though it was a non-smoking room, and there was an old TV on the dresser, and a desk with stationary with the hotel's logo on it.

I wondered if anyone really ever used that stationary or if the hotels just had it printed for good looks.

I took a shower, lingering under the hot water until the chills I'd gotten from the idea of a crazy person with a gun that wanted to kill me being so close had washed away. When I got out I stood in front of the mirror and stared at myself, really studied my jawline and my eyes and the curve of my nose. I do that sometimes, and it makes me feel more human when I'm afraid.

When I stepped out of the bathroom, I heard concerned voices in the hallway. I stepped up to the door and pressed my eyes against the peephole. Both of the security guards that were supposed to be on the ends of the hall were right in front of the door, looking down.

I opened the door.

Charley was curled up on the chair, her face buried in her knees, her shoulders shaking, crying.

"What's going on?" The two guards looked up at me helplessly.

Charley coughed and sputtered, "N- nothing, Nick," she said, taking a deep breath and trying to act like she hadn't been crying. "N-nothing's g-going on." She shook her head and sat up. "You guys go back to your p-posts, I'm f-fine."

The two guards shrugged and looked at me with apologetic expressions, then walked away slowly. Charley looked up at me. "You aren't s-supposed to be opening that d-door," she accused me.

"Sorry," I shrugged. I studied her for a minute, really searched her eyes, which were red from the tears she'd been crying. Not to mention the curved stains that traced her tears tracks down her face. I lowered myself and wiped away the stains with my hands, pressing my palms right against her cheeks, my thumbs very softly smoothing her skin. Charley stared right back at me, her chocolate brown eyes slightly questioning. "What's the matter?" I whispered.

Charly shook her head.

"Come inside," I pleaded.

"I have to keep you safe," she whispered, refusing.

"You can keep me safe in here," I replied. "There's a window. He could come through the window. Besides, I'm really lonely in here all by myself."

Charley took a deep breath, then glanced at the two guards on either end of the hallway. "Okay," she muttered.

I helped her up from the chair and we went inside the hotel room. "Here, go sit on the bed, I'll be right there." I stepped into the bathroom and got a face cloth and wet it with cool water before joining her in the room. Charley was perched on the edge of the bed, and she was crying again. I walked over and sat down next to her, then gently wiped her face with the cool cloth, just as she'd done for me when I was sick the day before.

This brought on more tears.

"Shh," I whispered, "It's okay."

"No it's not," Charley cried.

"No it really is," I answered, "I'm not scared at all anymore, see?" I pet her head softly with the cloth. "You're here, I know that means everything's gonna be all right, you know?"

Charley shook her head, sobbing. She looked so fucking sad, the way her mouth curved and the dents that her cheeks made in response. Her beautiful brown eyes were closed tightly and her shoulders shuddered. I hate it when people cry, but even worse I hate it when people I know don't normally cry cry.

The cloth was warm, so I got up and rinsed it again under cold water and when I came back, Charley was still shaking with tears. "Shhh," I whispered, pressing the newly cooled cloth to her cheek.

"I killed him," she gasped out the words.

"Who?" I asked gently, running the cloth along her forehead.

"Henry," she cried.

I had no clue who Henry was. I bit my lip to keep from asking, though, I assumed she'd tell me. I just stayed quiet. I slid a hand around her shoulders, and she sank against me.

"I wanted out of my parents' house so badly," she whispered, "That when I turned eighteen I enlisted in the army. I'd lost some weight in high school so I met the weight requirements but I had a fuck of a time getting through basic..." Charley pulled back from the embrace we were in and she looked up at me. "I gave it everything I had and I failed a couple times but I didn't give up, I stuck with it and the third time I went through basic, I really, really applied myself and I passed with recognition. I was shipped overseas following the 9/11 attacks and I did some time in Afghanistan. I didn't engage at all there, really, I mean we basically hung out in the desert in that round but I didn't want to go home so they sent me to Iraq." Charley paused. "I met this boy, - Henry," she said quietly, "In Iraq. He was a soldier, too, and he was so handsome and so nice. I got a sunburn and he called me Lobster." She sighed, "We used to talk all the time, we got paired a lot because we worked really well together. Anyways this one night, we were watching the news and the Iraqis had a soldier they'd taken prisoner and were torturing terribly, and we agreed that if it ever looked like we might be taken prisoner, we'd kill each other. We never thought it would happen until it did. We were playing Clue in the bunker and they suddenly came through the door and they had him and he was so scared looking and I couldn't let them take him so I punched the guy holding me and I took his gun and I shot Henry. Just like that."

"Like George and Lenny," I said quietly.

Charley nodded. "I got this scar," she reached down and touched her side, "Trying to escape from them. Another soldier shot them down and I was discharged." Charley's eyes were intense. "I failed at protecting him," she said quietly, "I don't want to fail at protecting you."

I bent closer and kissed her forehead softly.

"You know why I picked on you when we were kids?" she asked.

"Because you wanted my penis, we talked about this already," I said.

"Because I loved you," she said quietly.