After the big break up with John things seem to be moving along with Rayna and Nick, but nothing official quite yet. Rayna has yet to open herself to Nick on a personal level there was so much about her but she kept a lot of it locked inside . She didn’t know or understand why, maybe she didn’t understand herself. She still hasn’t even shown her picture to Nick she was too afraid to maybe he would see it and then never talk to her again? She was defiantly not a super model of any kind Rayna had no confidence John took whatever confidence she did have and just flushed it down the toilet. Rayna used to be happy go lucky until John came around and that’s when everything went downhill from there. The cheating and lying it made Rayna feel like he didn’t like her or find her attractive why else would a man cheat? Rayna didn’t know how to overcome this problem of hers. She had lived with it for so long John has been the only man she has ever been with or ever paid attention to her for that matter. She never dated in high school she mostly stuck to herself and just had a few groups of friends. Rayna never fit in either her parents didn’t make a whole lot of money so she was stuck wearing whatever they could afford at the time her friends always had the new clothes, shoes, and backpacks and then there was Rayna the odd ball.

When Rayna met John her senior year she loved that someone was paying attention to her someone noticed her, someone liked her but as the years went by John changed in which changed Rayna too. John wouldn’t allow her to hang out with certain friends and wouldn’t allow certain kinds of music to be played around him, and he actually had felt threatened by her posters of Nick she used to have hanging on her walls before they were even together. He would always say why even bother being together if you have some fantasy man on the side, but that just wasn’t the case with Rayna. Nick wasn’t just some fantasy man she felt connected to him during her teen years they were alike in so many ways. They had the same personality but now Rayna was questioning herself and who she was, and was this teen somewhere inside her? Can she get this personality to resurface? A lot of her hopes and dreams where just shattered by this man that was supposed  to be her protector, her best friend and her lover and he stole everything she had left and threw it out the window it was now time to do things for her and her children. It was time to start thinking about someone else other than John it was time to be Rayna not someone who wants her to be something completely different. Rayna made up her mind she was going to go for it. What did she have to lose? Nothing there was absolutely nothing she had to lose either this would work out or it just wouldn’t and they would just go back to being friends like they were in the first place. Rayna turned on her Pandora and heard.

She laid her heart and soul right in your hands

And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans

She never knew she had a choice

And that’s what happens

When the only voice she hears

Is telling her she can’t, you stupid boy

So what made you think

You could take a life

And just push it, push it around

I guess you built yourself up so high

You had to take her and break her down

            Rayna sang along with the song. Rayna felt connected with the song. As Rayna sang along it all started to make sense to her John did all of those things Rayna never had a voice of her own she never got to voice an opinion she was mute as far as John was concerned. Rayna heard her phone beep.

“Hey you what are you up to?

Rayna smiled it was Nick.

“Not much just sitting here thinking”

“About me? :)”

“Of course! I have been doing a lot of thinking lately actually”

“Is that so? Good thinking I hope”

“It’s always good thinking when it comes to you my dear.”

“So what have you been thinking about?”

“Me and you, the kids, and how incredibly awesome you are to them”

“But I haven’t even met you yet so how am I incredibly awesome?”

“Well for one you are just awesome to me and to the kids even though you are so far away you already pay more attention to the both of us more than John ever did and two I think I am ready to open up to you and show you everything if you are willing to still have me and the kids.”

Rayna sat and waited patiently for a text. A few minutes went by and there was still nothing from him, “Maybe he is just busy they are still recording the album. I need to learn to be more patient.” she thought and then her phone beeped.

“I am more than willing the question is are you ready to deal with all of this Backstreet stuff? After the album drops in October we will have a tour and then we have other things getting ready to be worked out.”

“Nick, I am just going to come out and say this I love you.”

Rayna sat there in silence again, “I can’t believe I just said that to him. I hope I didn’t scare him off. I can’t believe I did something so stupid ugh I am such an idiot.” Rayna didn’t know what to think she was worried everything was going to start just crashing right in front of her before it even starts, but maybe he feels the same way but just can’t come out and say it?

“Rayna…I love you too. I am sorry it took me so long to say it I wanted to tell you a million times but it never seemed like the right time to tell you. Everything feels right with you even though we have never met or seen each other face to face it all just seems right.”

Rayna felt like her heart was going to explode with all the pounding that was going on inside her chest. She didn’t know how to feel just quite yet but she was relieved that he felt the same way about her. Rayna decided to quickly snap a picture of herself and send it off to him it was now or never if she wanted to make this work she needed to do this no matter how insecure she was.

“You know you are one sexy lady. Why do you say such terrible things about yourself?”

“Lol you’re lying. I am terrible looking”

“Not to me you’re not”

Rayna smiled. She couldn’t help it but why did she still feel so insecure about it?  Nick already loved her for who she was even without seeing a picture of her. Rayna knew she would need to overcome these problems it certainly wasn’t going to be in the way.

“I’ll text you later the guys and I have a new song to get after. I’ll send you a clip when I can I think you will love it.”

“Kk, I’ll talk to you in a bit :)”

Rayna sighed she knew since this thing was official with Nick her life wasn’t going to be the same anymore there was going to be a lot of changing and adapting she was going to have to overcome. It was going to be quite a challenge for her not just for her but for the kids as well.

Song “Stupid Boy” sung by Keith Urban