Daddies’ Girls

By Rachel

Copyright 2012

Chapter 29

Aspen

Today I am spending the day with Jade and baby Jasmine. Little Jazzy is tiny and precious. It was hard to believe I will be holding my own baby in about six months.

“You’re even quieter than usual. What’s bugging you Red?” Jade asks as she comes back from the kitchen.

I’m busy giving Jasmine all my attention. I don’t really want to talk about my problems. I am tired of it all.  Knowing Jade, she will not let it go. To tell you the truth I’m jealous of her and Nick. It’s not that they have the perfect relationship because they don’t. I am jealous that they are so open with one another. Why can’t I have that with AJ?

Why am I so insecure lately when it comes to my husband? He loves me. I love him. I can tell him anything. So why can’t I?

“Red, I know Jazz is beautiful, but you can’t avoid me.” I don’t answer her. “Aspen Ruby, what the hell is your problem? You’ve changed.”

“What do you mean?” I can’t even look at my sister. Embarrassment covers my face.

“You have always been serious, but not to the point where you shut everyone out.” Jade takes a sleeping Jasmine from me.

I don’t answer for a minute. My sister’s comments should hurt, but they don’t. She is being brutally honest. I’m a mess emotionally. “Things just suck at the moment.”

“I thought things were getting better with you and AJ. He told Nick that things were back to normal.”

Why is he lying about our problems? Things are okay, but definitely not normal. It makes me feel worse that he thinks things are fine. Maybe I am overreacting. I’m not sure of anything at this time.

“We are talking, but I’m frustrated because AJ won’t talk about the baby.”  I say nonchalantly. I can’t force him to talk.

“Red, do you really think he doesn’t want this baby? He’s been after you forever to have another baby.” Jade looks at me like I’m crazy.

“Only because he thought it would help things, but it’s not helping. It pains me to know that he doesn’t love this child. Is he going to resent it?” I spill out my greatest fear.

I hear some fumbling in the kitchen. AJ and Nick must be back from golfing. This means that AJ and I will be alone together. Not that I mind, but it’s still hard sometimes talking to him.  I’m afraid of saying the wrong thing.

“Aspen, you need to talk to him.” Jade says as our men walk into the room. “So who won?”

“I did. Poor Nicky, here, has been pouting all the way home.” AJ cackles.

“That’s because I owe you five hundred bucks.” Nick grumbles. Jade walks over and wraps her arms around him. They look at each other and begin to kiss.

I feel sick in the pit of my stomach. I am insanely jealous. I look up at AJ and he looks away quickly. Something is up. Maybe I am making too much out of every glance he makes, but he doesn’t seem relaxed after his day of golf.

The happy couple breaks apart. “Well we better get home. Michael and Cameron are going to spend the evening with us. It’s a family movie night.”

AJ walks them out. I just sit on the sofa and wait for him to return. What seems like an hour is only a few minutes.

“Aspen, let’s go out for dinner. There’s something I want to show you.” AJ sits beside me.

“That sounds good.”

“I love you, Aspen. Please remember that.” He brushes a kiss onto my cheek. The tenderness in his kiss means a lot to me. I resist speaking because I’m ready to cry.

Twenty minutes later we are in the car. AJ is being hush-hush about everything. I think it’s sweet that he is being so secretive. Even though I hate surprises, I am intrigued. He loves giving surprises, so I am used to this.

“Why are we at the grocery store?” I asked when AJ pulls into Trader Joe’s.

“I need to get a few things.  Relax I’ll be out in a few minutes.” AJ gets out of the car before I have a chance to speak.

I sit in the Audi playing with the radio. I am feeling irritable at the moment. Waiting for my husband is only making it worse. I am tired of being a Debbie Downer. I want things to be the way they were last year before we started fighting. I pray that our relationship gets better.

I am lost in thought as AJ puts a few bags behind his seat. I can smell food and my stomach growls. AJ seems in great spirits.

“What’s got you all excited?” I ask curiously.

“There was this young dude singing. He was amazing.” AJ pulls out of the parking lot.

“You thinking about working with him?” I am happy that he is excited about his work.

“I want to. I think he can be the next big thing.” AJ taps the steering wheel as we stop at the red light.

“Did you get this guy’s information?” I ask, trying to keep the conversation going.

“Yep. His name is Seth Livingstone.”

“He goes to school with Reese. They are on the academic team together.” I comment.

“I’ve never heard her mention him before.” AJ zooms into traffic like a crazy man.

“That’s because the two of you never talk about school. She complains about how smart he is and how is always trying to outdo her in class projects. Reese hates that it’s always a competition between the two of them. She thinks he’s a nerd.”

“He didn’t seem like a nerd to me.” AJ pulls into a spot on a street. I look around and wonder why we are at the building of my old cupcake shop.

“What…are we…doing here?” I question.

“Surprise.” He gives me an ornery smile. “I know that you want more in your life. So the other day I drove past and saw a for sale sign. I know that you loved that cupcake shop. You are always baking scrumptious goodies at home. I bought the place and figured you could open up the shop again.”

I sit there not saying a word. I can’t believe he would do this for me. I don’t know whether to hug him or smack him. I am overwhelmed by his kindness. Maybe he does care about more me than I think he does. That makes me feel guilty.

“Aren’t you going to say anything?” I reach over and hug him. I don’t let go for a long time. I just want to hold him like this forever. I’m afraid to let him go.

“Thank you.” I whisper. “Thank you.”

“So, you’re happy?” He pulls back. The twinkle in his eyes is enough to make me want to jump him. Too bad we are in a coupe.

“I am.” I nod. “But what happens when the baby comes along.”

AJ stiffens. I knew things weren’t going to go that smoothly. I shouldn’t have mentioned the baby, but we couldn’t pretend it didn’t exist. The baby would arrive whether things were better or not.

“Let’s go inside and talk about this.”

Once inside the building, AJ sets up dinner. We sit on the floor and eat. Neither of us is talking. I’m tired of feeling awkward around my husband. I decide to open myself up to him.

“I know you aren’t happy that I’m pregnant. That’s fine. It hurts that you don’t want this baby. I’m going to love him or her no matter what. It’s not the baby’s fault our marriage is in a rut. If you don’t want this baby, I can’t see our marriage lasting. I love you, but our baby comes first.” I don’t even stop to take a breath. He stares at me after my tirade. I worry about what he will say.

“Aspen, calm down.” AJ grabs my hand and starts rubbing it. “What makes you think I don’t want our baby?”

I move closer to him and he pulls me so that I am sitting between his legs facing him. “We haven’t talked about the baby since we found out. You weren’t happy then, so I assume you aren’t happy now.”

“I’m sorry, Aspen, so sorry. I wasn’t sure how you were feeling about the baby. I didn’t want to bring it up until you were ready.” He cups my chin and brings my face up to his. “I’m so excited that we are having a baby. Not because it’s going to help our marriage. I love you and this baby. I’m so happy to be adding to our family.”

“Really?” I ask, still not completely sure.

“Yes. I know I’ve been a dick. I had no right to act that way towards you. Things are going to change starting now. I love you so much Aspen. It’s always been you and will always be you.” The look in his eyes gives me chills.

I wrap my arms around his neck. “Make love to me.”

“Here?”

“Yes, here. The blinds are closed no one will see us.” I smile.

“Are you sure?” He doesn’t believe me.

“I’m positive. It’s always been about me and my needs. It’s time for me to experience what you like. It’s all about compromise and new experiences. I love you Alexander James McLean.” I push him to the ground and straddle his waist.

Our lips meet in a heated kiss. Things are looking up. I know everything is going fine between us. Today is a fresh start.