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“Blind Within The Shadows”



‘Now what to do, my heart has been bruised, so sad but it’s true. Each beat reminds me of you.’ Christina Aguilera- “Walk Away”



Chapter One: Unreal



As the sun begins to rise, fourteen-year-old Jessica Carter rushes out of bed and down to the basement for her daily routine. She stretches her body calmly, becoming flexible and limber. Jessica breathes deeply as her body tenses. Her chin-length honeysuckle locks flutter rapidly about her face, her ocean blue eyes sparkling with flames when she swiftly delivers fierce blows and thrusts to her punching bag. Sand slowly starts to leak from the bag as a result. Her 5’9”, trim, athletic frame glitters with sweat under the hot florescent lights above her. She keeps throwing punches and other fighting maneuvers into the bag for three hours straight. She’s only stopping because the bag finally splits in two, sand soaring throughout the small room. One half falls limply to the floor with sand still in it, while the other empties instantly and dangles from its chain connected to the ceiling.



She sits down on the padded floor annoyed, fighting to keep her muscles tense. Jessica can’t let them relax. She appreciates what will happen if she does. The young girl isn’t like other girls, and she abhors that with a blazing passion. It’s quite the contrary actually. She’s been raised like a soldier, only rougher. She’s been trained almost all of her life to become a slaughtering machine. To fight nonstop. The thing is, is that Jessica never gets tired from the training or fighting; she only gets tired from a lack of sleep. The amount her body considers a lack of is unusual in itself. For her body, lack of sleep means no sleep for at least fifteen days straight.



Jessica stands again, beginning to jog in place, mumbling “No doubt about it, I’m a God damn freak.”



She came to this conclusion when she was only seven years old. Jessica had climbed to the roof of her three-story house and jumped off, thinking she could fly like Superman. Now, to any normal person this would kill them or at least injure them pretty badly. What’s shocking is that she didn’t even break a bone. Nor was there one scratch or bruise marring her body. That was when Mike began her training. Yet, she’s not invincible, there are weaknesses. She has hopes, dreams, fears, etc. Then there’s the major one: after fighting or training, the moment she lets her muscles relax, she’ll pass out for about an hour. She has no idea why, but it always happens, right on schedule.



“I hate this. It’s not like I’m tired, short-winded, or too sore to move. So why the hell does this always happen to me? I guess everything has its price, even when you don’t want it and will gladly give it back to be normal.” She growls as she finally relaxes her muscles and feels herself collapse to the ground as everything fades to black.



~*~*~*~*~*~*~



**Jessica Carter runs down a colorfully decorated hallway. She feels safe and loved. She hears childlike giggling and realizes it’s coming from her. She looks down at her body, finding herself to be four years old once again. Jessica gazes about at the caring adults around her with wonder as they watch her kindly. She turns her head and keeps running. Her blonde hair, that’s now down to the middle of her back, flying about as she does. She wonders why she’s running and soon sees whom she’s chasing. A small, blonde haired boy about her height and her age with bright sapphire eyes that twinkle and look familiar. He turns his head around and tries to get away from her in their chase game. She soon catches up with him and pulls the boy to the ground playfully. She smiles and they hug tightly.



“Jessie!” the boy yells happily.



“Nicky! I wuv u so mush!” she yells back.



“I wuvs you too!”



Yet, the joy between the two feels normal. She feels at peace for once in her life. She identifies the fact that she loves him deeply. That he is her entire life and her happiness and she is his. Suddenly, everything shifts then and they’re both a little older. They have aged only slightly, maybe two years, three years tops.



“Nicky?” she hears a more articulate version of her voice ask.



“Yeah?”



“You ever think we’ll get a mommy and daddy?”



“Dunno, but we’ll always be together.”



Then out of nowhere a pair of strong masculine hands grab her roughly and pick her up. She looks about. Her surprise keeps her quiet.



“Yes, I want her. Jessica Carter’s her name right?” she hears a tough, male voice say.



“Yes Sir, Jessica Rose Carter. But are you sure? You should also take little Nick here. They’re so close. They’ve never been separated from each other. It’s cruel to split them apart.” A familiar feminine tone replies.



“I can’t take Nickolas. Trust me. I CAN’T.” he spits out fiercely, shifting Jessica in his arms. Her big blue eyes fixating upon the little boy pleadingly.



“Jessie?” he asks softly.



“Wha bout Nicky?” she asks the man innocently.



“NO, I’m only taking you honey.”



“NO! NICKY!”



“JESSIE!!!”



“NO! NICKY! NICKY!” Jessica screams out in heart-wrenching pain, trying to get away but can’t escape the man’s strong, muscular arms. Tears stream down her young baby face as she’s carried off by the man into the stormy night.**



~*~*~*~*~*~*~



“Jessie, Jessie! Wake up!” she hears a voice call out to her. Jessica groans, shoving the force away powerfully. A painful grunt is heard, coming from the other side of the basement. She opens her eyes in confusion as to what’s going on. She wipes away the tears trailing down her face hurriedly. She can still hear her younger self cry our for the unknown boy she called Nicky. Her eyes focus on her kind, sixteen year old friend with reddish, sandy colored hair and clear cerulean orbs. He brushes himself off, coming over to help her up.



“Oh my God Brian I am so sorry. Are you alright?”



He smiles at her, “Yes I’m fine. Teaches me not to try to wake you from one of your psycho post-fight pass out spells.” He jokes.



She grins at him awkwardly, “Oops.”



He laughs, as he makes her stand. The two teens both go upstairs and into the kitchen. Brian sits at a round wooden table, while Jessica goes to the kitchen. Brian shakes his head as she fixes them both a glass of milk. It doesn’t matter how long he’s known her, these pass out spells she gets after fighting scare him, and he’ll never get used to it. He just will never tell her that.



“Good thing Mike and Rachael are gone already. Lord knows how they would’ve waken you up if they woulda found you there.” Brian comments softly. Feeling guilty after because of the mention of her “parents”.



Mike and Rachael Karona are her adoptive parents. They never let her forget that fact either. Jessica’s been with them since she was six years old. They told her then never to call them mom or dad. She never wanted to anyways. They are the ones who train her constantly to become the killing machine she’s absolutely capable of being. Not that it matters to her. Let them train her if it lets her go have fun earlier in the day. That’s the way she looks at it. Eight years later though, and the place still doesn’t feel like home to her. They still do not feel like a real family. Not that the Karonas ever made her feel welcome. The ones who did were her current best friends: Brian Littrell, and his cousin Kevin Richardson, who’s two years older than him. They’ve been there for her since they found out the Karonas adopted her. Brian lives next door to her with his mom, dad, and older brother, Harold. Kevin and his mom live across the street. They’ve always making her feel as normal as she can ever feel. She loves them and is incredibly thankful for it, because it’s a rare feeling for her.



“Whatever dude. They left before I woke up to train. You know how early that is. They meant to avoid me.”



Brian gazes at his friend, hearing the bitter tone within her usually cheerful voice. “Hey, you know mine and Kev’s family always consider you family right?”



Jessica nods, “Yeah I know Bri, it’s cool. I don’t even care anymore, trust me.”



“I know better.”



“It’s not like I can do anything about it, so why bother caring?”



“Jess, you should talk when you have a problem. Haven’t you learned yet that it helps you? I-”



“Save it. You’re fighting a hopeless battle. I’m okay.”



“Fine. I’ll let it go for now.” He sighs, seeing the emotions swirl within her fiery eyes. “There’s something else bothering you too.”



“No I-”



“C’mon sweetie, you can tell the doctor.” He jokes quietly.



“Can I now? Call me sweetie and you’ll need a doctor. DR. LITTRELL.”



“Don’t be a smartass. Have you been having that dream again?”



Jessica mutters a string of curses, irritating Brian slightly.



“You know Jess, would it really kill you to act like a lady?”



“Shut up.”



“C’mon, seriously, have you been having that dream?”



She moans inaudibly with anguish, “Yes B, I’ve been having the dream again. That Nick boy, who is he? Why do I dream of him so frequently? I always end up waking up crying. It’s been torturing me. I feel so lost.”



“Do you think the dream’s trying to tell you something.”



“Quit with your psychology crap! I don’t know!” She cries out as Brian goes to her and wraps his arm around her. She stands and lets her best friend wrap her in his embrace. She was lucky to have him as a friend. “I feel so incomplete Brian, like a puzzle that lost a piece. I don’t know why and it drives me crazy.”



“Jessica, I-”



“But I don’t know why I’m like this! We both know I’m a freak who’s family ditched her. Why am I this way? Were my real parents not able to accept me? Who am I? Are the dreams a way of telling me I’m insane AND a freak of nature! Brian, the dream, it hurts so much. Why am I so different from everybody else? Who am I? Why can’t I be normal?” She yells, finally letting all her emotions out. Brian strokes her silky hair as she collapses against him, sobbing in his arms.