Chapter 8
AJ had been on stage in front of millions of people. He had tripped, torn his pants, gotten an erection. He had messed up lyrics, wrecked harmonies, and made a complete ass of himself. But he had never been more nervous than the moment he stepped out of the taxi in front of Woodbine Rehabilitation Centre.
The woman who greeted them at the door was short and plump. Her face looked kind and serene, and her demeanor quickly calmed some of AJ’s nerves. She introduced herself as Auntie J. “For Aunt Jemima,” she whispered, playfully nudging AJ in the ribs. He tried to smile slightly. He had to admit, the name was fitting.
Auntie J spoke quietly as she walked them through the main building. She pointed out the therapists’ wing and the exercise and cafeteria buildings outside the window. Passing a closed door, she gestured at the sign above the entrance. ‘Woodbine West’ it read, and Auntie J looked at AJ sternly. “That is the women’s wing. It is completely off limits to all male guests. No exceptions allowed.” AJ saw Brian smirk.
“Smart of them to keep you separate from the ladies, Bone.” He whispered, giggling a little. Had AJ been less stressed, he probably would have made some sex joke in return. But he couldn’t even imagine sex right now - let alone communicating with strangers. Let alone females. Auntie J brought them into the men’s wing (‘Woodbine East’, originally enough), and down a small hallway to an open living space with four closed doors. There was a small kitchenette in the corner where a woman in a work dress stood. “This here is your new home at Woodbine. The living space is run by Ms. Sofia. She is your on-call nurse.” The woman walked forward, gesturing them to one of the closed doors marked 112C.
“Hola, Alex! This is your new home. I call it the Honeycomb room.” Sofia had a heavy Spanish accent and reminded AJ of Howie. Not just the Hispanic part. She was short and moved quickly, and her eyes were gentle and honest. He glanced toward Brian before entering the room, and if his ESP had been stronger he would guess that Brian was thinking the same thing. His room - his new ‘home’ - was painted a pale yellow and contained a comfortable-looking bed, desk, and set of drawers. It wasn’t overly spacious, but it wasn’t terrible either. This Woodbine place was not like he was expecting. He had pictured hospital hallways, tiny shared rooms with white walls. Woodbine was much more...homey. Was ‘homey’ a word? He quietly walked to the window and gazed at the mountains. He suddenly had no idea what to do.
Auntie J turned to Brian. “Thank you so much for supporting Alex. If you’d like, I can bring you up to the front and we can discuss visiting hours while Alex here gets comfortable.”
“When are visiting hours?”
“After the first week, they are every day from 10:30am-3pm.”
“After the first week?” Brian repeated.
“There are no visitors the first week. We like our guests to get acclimated to the environment and work out some initial life-changes on their own.”
“What?!” AJ yelped. He spun, terrified. His eyes met Brian’s as Brian closed the space between them, pulling him into a bone-crushing hug.
“Okay.” Brian’s voice sounded as if he were trying to convince himself as well. “That’s okay, Alex. You can do that. It’s okay.” He turned his gaze to Sofia, still hugging AJ. “One week from today? 10:30am?” She nodded, and Brian tightened his grip on his friend, repeating himself. “Okay. One week from today, Alex, I will be right here. Okay? I love you.” He gave one last final squeeze, locking eyes with AJ as he pulled away. “I love you.”
***
Howie and Nick entered the recording studio together a few hours later. “Dude, think about how different shit was twenty-four hours ago when we were in here.”
“I know.” Howie replied, sighing. He really wasn’t looking forward to seeing Kevin. Howie had tried to argue with Brian about returning to the island to tell the most senior member of the group, but Brian wouldn’t back down. He was refusing to leave Wyoming until AJ was released. He even made sounds about renting a house for however long it took. Howie had no idea what they would say to management. They would have to put the production of the CD on hold. Kevin was going to flip a shit. He could feel his blood pressure rising from the stress. Why was he the only one who cared about deadlines and expectations? He’d probably end up writing this whole damn album.
Although he had hoped that they would have a bit of time to sit before Kevin showed up, it was only a matter of minutes before he entered the room. “Dude, you two look like shit. Did you go out without me last night?” He laughed a little as he headed toward the coffeepot, ruffling the blonde’s hair as he walked past. “You should sleep more, Nicky.”
Nick let out a little gulp, tears springing to his eyes. Howie sprang into action. “Kev...”
Kevin froze halfway between pouring coffee into a mug. He slowly looked at both his bandmates a little closer. “Where is Brian?”
“Kevin, last night-”
“WHERE IS BRIAN?!” The bellow that came from their self-appointed leader caused Nick to yelp. Howie held up his hands toward Kevin’s chest.
“Brian is in Wyoming. He isn’t coming back. He is with AJ. At that place you found a couple months ago. Woodridge?”
“-Woodbine.” Nick interrupted. Howie was surprised. Nick was usually pretty vague on details.
“Alex needs us right now, Kevin. I know you don’t get it, but-”
“Fuck, no, I don’t get it! What the hell happened last night? What drug are you all on? He duped you all again? Am I the only intelligent one here?” Kevin slammed the coffee mug onto the table.
“He tried to kill himself. Brian gave him CPR. He’s a mess, Kev. I’m going up there too.” Nick’s voice was soft, his eyes downcast. Leave it to Nick to take Howie by surprise twice in less than a minute. “We’re his brothers. We’re all he has. He needs us. He needs you.”
Howie couldn’t believe his ears. Nicky was standing up to Kevin. By the look in Kevin’s emerald eyes, he couldn’t believe it either. “Nicky,” His voice was soft, almost condescending. “He doesn’t need us. He’s playing you. I know you don’t see it-”
“I’m not a fucking fool!” Nick screamed. “You didn’t see him, Kevin! You didn’t hold him as he cried himself to sleep or stand by helplessly as he tried to shut us out! I’m not a child anymore, and neither is AJ. I am a brother before a Backstreet Boy and I am going to Wyoming. You can’t fucking stop me.”
Kevin’s mouth was literally hanging open. He turned toward Howie. “And you?”
“I- um.... yeah. Yes. I am going to Wyoming.” Howie cringed. He sounded like an idiot. Nick’s resolve gave him new courage. Man, these tables sure were turning in this group. Screw management. Screw the CD and the producing and the stress. Screw Kevin, if it came to it. Not literally, obviously. Just purely figuratively.
There was a long, pregnant pause from the eldest Backstreet Boy.
“It’s him or me.”
“What?!” Howie and Nick yelled at the same time.
“Either he’s out or I’m out.”
“Of the band?” Howie’s words were quiet. He was almost afraid to utter them out loud.
Silence filled the room. After a second long pause, his gaze shifted between the two remaining band members. “Well?”
Nick stood. “Kevin. You have always been a big brother to me. To AJ too. You’ve done more for me than I could ever care to admit. I don’t know why you are so angry, but right now I need to be there for AJ. I’m going to Wyoming.” He began to walk out of the room, pausing in front of the eldest band member. “I love you, Kev.” He turned and walked out of the studio.
Howie watched Kevin. He could see that the young man’s words had hit the Kentuckian hard, but the oldest attempted to shake them off with some humor. “He grew up all of the sudden, didn’t he?”
“Last night, to be precise.” Howie didn’t care that he made Kevin flinch. “Kev, I don’t know what your problem is. Well, I do, actually. But we have to give AJ the benefit of the doubt that he’s trying to become a better person. Why would you be opposed to that?” Kevin opened his mouth to argue, but Howie cut him off. “Don’t do anything rash. Take some time to think. We’ll be in Wyoming if you change your mind.” He sighed, watching Kevin. He knew that jaw clench. Kevin wasn’t listening anymore. He walked forward and placed his hand awkwardly on the taller man’s shoulder. Repeating Nick’s words, he gave Kevin’s arm a squeeze. “I love you, Kev.”
Chapter End Notes:
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