Dark Times in Still Waters
Chapter 5
By Dottie
Copyright 2013
When Kevin returns to the party, he finds Natalie hanging out with Brian while the rest of the guys are partying with the fans. He looks around noticing the fans seem somewhat subdued. He knows it would push Teagan further into her depression.
Jumping up and grabbing a microphone, he yells to get everyone's attention. When they finally look at him, he takes a deep breath. "Listen, I know today has been rough for all of us. Not exactly what we expected from the cruise but...things are ok now. So let's get back to having fun, ok?" Everyone starts cheering and he yells, "Crank up the music!"
While the crowd revs up and the party starts, Kevin hops off his perch. As he waves at the fans he grabs Howie in what looks like a big bear hug. In his ear, he yells, "She's ok. I convinced her to let us take turns sitting with her. I think we better save Nick for last. You go ahead; I'll let the others know."
Howie nods. "What do I say to her?"
Kevin shrugs. "Anything. Just keep her talking. Try to convince her to join in on cruise stuff. But....don't make the same mistake I did. If she gets antsy, let it go. Try to stay half an hour or so, then come and send Brian." Looking around, he sees Brian being goofy with Natalie and he smiles. Teagan will be pleased to know she's having fun. "And Howie? Tell her Natalie's ok."
Howie nods. "Will do. I'll be back."
Teagan still sits on her bed, dreading the impending visits, but it was the only way to get Kevin out of the room. The more time she spends with him, the more she wants to...and that confuses her. She came on this cruise with a healthy lust for Nick Carter, but the way Kevin has been treating her has gone straight to her heart...and that scares the living daylights out of her.
She's drawing pictures of musical notes in her journal when there's a knock at the door. Taking a deep breath she calls out, "Come in," all the while praying it's not Nick. When the door opens and Howie walks in, she breathes a sigh of relief. "Hi."
He smiles at her and she feels relieved. "Hi Teagan. Kevin said I could come sit with you for a while."
She nods. "Yeah. His condition for me skipping the party. I have to have babysitters."
Howie shakes his head. "He's worried. We all are Teagan. We've never come up on anything like this before."
She scoots her feet back and says, "Why don't you sit?" When he does, she keeps her head turned slightly away from him. "I don't think anyone's come across across a monster like me before."
He sighs. "Teagan, if we all tell you you're not a monster, will you start believing us? Because you are NOT a monster."
She sighs. "I'm sorry but I just can't..."
He reaches out and takes her hand. "Teagan listen to me. You're the victim of an accident. A horrible accident. You're not a monster by any means. Monsters don't care about others. Monsters don't care what others think. You do. You're a beautiful person."
As his words sink in, tears start to form. "Howie, I just don't...I can't face..."
He lifts her hand and kisses the back of it. "You don't have to if you don't want to. We want you to come party with us, but no one is going to force you."
She nods, grateful for that. "Thank you. I mean it." When he smiles, she whispers, "You guys are just as nice as we thought you would be."
He moves until he's sitting beside her on the bed and puts his arm around her. She puts her head on his shoulder as he says, "We're just us, Teagan. Nothing special."
She sighs, bringing her hand up to her face to wipe away a tear. "That's where you're wrong. You are VERY special."
He turns and kisses her head. "So are you, Teagan. So are you."
After Howie leaves, he stands in the hallway trying to get a grip on his emotions. He’s been around emotional women before, but honestly, he’s never seen anyone as fragile as Teagan is. He feels so sad for her but he can’t let it show.
He makes his way back to the party and finds Kevin. “Dude, she is really in a bad place isn’t she?”
Kevin nods. “All I want to do is help her, Howie. I just don’t know how.”
Howie watches him closely. “You really like her, don’t you?”
Kevin is startled by his question. “Well, of course I like her…”
Howie cuts him off. “No, you REALLY like her…don’t you?”
Kevin looks at him uneasily. “I don’t know Howie. For real. I just want to take care of her.”
Howie nods. “Brian and Natalie are dancing. I’m going to send AJ to sit with her.”
Kevin glances around, waving to a group of fans. “Great.”
Howie walks away, secretly amazed. Since his divorce, Kevin hasn’t shown much interest in any kind of woman. Not because of his divorce, that was an amicable split. He just seemed so focused on getting back into the group he didn’t seem to want to be in a relationship. Now all of the sudden, here’s a woman on the brink of a breakdown and all Kevin can think of is taking care of her. When he gets to AJ, he playfully punches him in the stomach. “You’re up Buddy.”
AJ nods, slapping his hands together. “About time.” He and Howie walk to the edge of the balcony, and AJ turns, his face getting serious. “How is she?”
Howie shrugs. “She’s really down on herself. It’s hard to keep her from beating herself up about her looks.”
AJ nods. “OK, wish me luck. I’ll be back.”
Howie shakes his head. “You won’t need luck, AJ. You have a way of drawing out the fans with self-esteem issues.”
AJ smiles faintly. “It’s because I know how they feel. I’ll be back, D.”
Teagan is a little more relaxed when the knock comes. She never thought she’d be able to have a conversation with Howie. Of all the guys, he always struck her as the one she wouldn’t connect with. She raises her voice lightly to ask, “Who is it?” wincing at the gravely, distorted timber of her voice.
The door opens and AJ pops his head in. “Just me! Can I come in?”
Teagan feels a genuine smile tugging at her lips. “If I say no?”
He pouts outrageously. “You’d let Howie in but turn ME away? Really?”
She can’t suppress the giggle that bubbles up. “No, come in.”
He walks in and makes himself at home. He crawls up the bed. “Make room Woman.”
She scoots to the edge of the bed as he stretches out beside her, propping himself up on his elbow. “Please, make yourself at home.”
He laughs. “I will. So what you doin?”
She shrugs lightly; suddenly aware she can’t hide her scar from him. “Just doodling.”
He senses her uneasiness. He leans closer and kisses her arm, his soft bushy beard tickling her arm. “Let me see.” He looks down at the book in her lap, but it’s not what’s on the page that gets his attention. “Hey, I like your nails!”
She holds her hand up and he grabs it to look closer. “Thanks.”
Her nails are painted white with musical notes and symbols painted on them. “No, seriously, this is wicked cool. You gotta do my nails!”
She just looks at him and laughs. “Are you serious?”
He sits up. “Damn right, I love this! Come on, let’s do this! If you don’t have the stuff to do it, I’ll be right back!”
She can’t stop giggling, feeling totally at ease with AJ. “No, no, I have it…I just…are you for real?”
He gives her a serious look. “My nails are no laughing matter, Lady.” His stoic attitude makes her laugh again. He smiles widely, pleased she so at ease with him. “Come on, for real, will you do my nails? We can trade services. You do my nails and I’ll give you one of my world famous AJ McLean foot rubs.”
She just shakes her head in disbelief. “Well, you don’t have to…I mean, I’ll be glad to do it.”
So the next half hour is spent with him taking off his nail polish and her repainting his nails while he regales her with all the different wild ways he’s had his nails painted. When she’s finished, he studies his nails closely. “This is great. What, do you do random notes? Hey, we have the same ones!”
She shakes her head. “No, it’s not random. That’s the first eight notes of a song.”
He studies them closely. “What song? Really?”
She nods. “Really. But I’m not telling you what song. You have to guess.”
He looks up pouting. “Come on, tell me!” She shakes her head no. He gets a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “I bet I can make you tell me.” Her eyes are sparkling and it distracts him from everything else. “Your eyes are so incredibly blue, Teagan. Gorgeous!” She looks away, embarrassed and suddenly realizing she completely forgot her deformity. Sighing, the walls snap back into place. AJ sees it and leans closer. “Hey, don’t do that. It’s still just me.”
She sees he’s really hurt by her defenses. “I’m sorry AJ.”
Her whisper breaks his heart. “Sweetheart, you have nothing to be sorry for. Nothing at all.” Careful of his newly painted nails, he gathers her into his arm. As she lays with her head on his shoulder, her whispers softly. “You’re not alone here, Teagan. You can lean on us if you need to, but I think you’re stronger than you give yourself credit for.”
She sniffles against his chest. “Two months ago I would have believed you.”
He kisses her temple. “You can believe it now, Lady. It’s true. You just have to have faith.”
She shivers in his arms, not answering. She used to have faith. Until a bullet blew it away in the blink of an eye.
Chapter End Notes:
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