Why Are We Still Friends

By Rachel

Copyright 2014

Chapter 33

Pushing Nick aside, I stood up and started gathering my belongings. I kept telling myself to stay in control. There was no need to freak out. Lots of women got pregnant out of wedlock. It was normal in our culture.

“Lexi, what are you doing?” Nick’s voice was full of panic.

“I need to go home.” I threw my belongings in my bag.

Nick grabbed my bag, so I wouldn’t leave. “Don’t you want to talk about it?”

“What’s there to say? I’m pregnant. Now give me my bag. I want to go home.” I pulled my bag from his arms.

“I know you’re in shock.” Nick continued to follow me as I made my way downstairs and out the door.

“Nick, please don’t.” I felt myself start to hyperventilate. “I just…need time.”

He understood that I had to come to terms with the pregnancy on my own. “Please call me when you get home. I need to know your safe.” I nodded my head and left.

The drive home did nothing to clear my head. I couldn’t get over the fact that I was having Brian’s baby. After his revelation today, this was the worst thing that could happen. Would he keep this baby hidden from the world, too?

I was surprised to see Brian’s car when I turned into the driveway. How long had he been waiting for me? Taking a few breaths helped me regain my composure. I wasn’t ready to tell him the news.

“Brian, what are you doing here?” I asked when I walked inside my house.

“I’ve come to apologize. We need to talk Tiger Lily. I love you so much.” Brian got everything out at once.

“You’re right we need to talk. I do love you Brian, but I’m not ready to forgive you.” I told him truthfully.

“I never meant to keep Katy Jane a secret.”

My stomach is churning; I quickly sit down on the couch. “You’ve known about your daughter for four years and you couldn’t find the right time to tell me?”

“Like I said before, it’s complicated.” He sits across from me.

“Explain it to me.”

The pained expression on Brian’s face told me he didn’t want to tell me. Too bad, I wanted to know the truth.

Brian takes my hand in his. “Five years ago, I saw Vienna, Katy Jane’s mother. I was visiting my parents. We met at a coffee shop. Vi was different from other women. She was a free-spirit. Vi worked at an art museum and taught art class to little kids. I fell for her instantly.”

“There’s nothing wrong with being in love.”  So far, I didn’t understand why he was keeping this a secret.

“I spent all my free time with her.” He looked down at the ground.

“What did you parents think of Vienna?” I asked, curiously.

“Lex, my parents never met her.”  He said in anguish.

I pulled my hand away from him. This was not the Brian I knew and loved. “Brian, I’m shocked. Hiding things from your friends is one thing, but keeping it from your parents is absurd. What kind of woman were you dating that you couldn’t tell your parents?” I was dumbfounded.

“I couldn’t tell my parents. Vienna was older than me.” Brian stood up.

“Brian, you’re older than me. I don’t see what the big deal is.”

“She was fifty. I was thirty-three.” Shit, that was a seventeen year difference, but Brian was a grown man. It wasn’t uncommon for men to date older women. Cougars were the in thing.

“Age is just a number. I don’t see why you kept this hidden.”

Brian leaned against the wall. Tears were streaming down his face. I knew I should have felt bad for him, but I didn’t. Honestly, I found it immature that a man in his thirties had to hide that fact that he was dating an older woman.

“Vienna is a close friend of my mom.” He admitted.

“So she wasn’t someone you had met. Damn it, Brian! You keep lying to me over and over again. You can’t tell the truth without telling a lie.” I raised my voice.

“Fine, I knew her. Now you see why I can’t tell anyone. My mom would freak out about it.” He explained as he slid to the floor.

I pinched the bridge of my nose trying to stop the pain in my head. I didn’t know how many more lies I could take today. I leaned back on the couch.

“Aren’t you going to say something?” He asked harshly.

“What do want me to say? I don’t get the attitude from you. I didn’t do anything wrong.” I got up and made my way into the kitchen.

I filled a glass with water and took a long drink. My nerves were shot with the pregnancy and Brian’s debacle. I never thought Brian would get himself into this kind of mess. He always followed the rules and stayed on the path. I was the same way, and look at the mess I was in. I wasn’t any better than Brian.

“Lexi, thanks for just leaving me.” He pushed past me to get to the other side of the room.

“I needed a moment to calm down.” I placed my glass in the sink. “You know I hate fighting.”

“Lex, I’m sorry for lying to you. I never meant to. One lie turned into another lie, which turned into another lie. It was never my intention to hurt you.” He almost sounded sincere. I wasn’t buying his act.

“You didn’t just lie to me. You’ve lied to everyone you cared about. What happens when your daughter is old enough to know that her daddy doesn’t want the world to know? What if Katy Jane spills the beans? Lies come back to haunt you.”

“Don’t you think I know that?” He yelled. “I never want to hurt Katy Jane. I love her so much.”

“Then do the right thing. Go to Kentucky and be a father to your daughter.” I shouted as I started to cry.

“What about us?” He whispered.

“What about us?” I repeated, moving closer to Brian. “I love you Peter Pan, but I think we need some time apart.”

His eyes widen. “You’re breaking up with me?”

I shook my head. “I can’t be in a relationship that is built on lies. You’ve been lying to me for years. I deserve more.”

Brian pressed a kiss to my cheek. Then he turned and walked out of my life.