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Project: nkotBSB

By Dottie

Copyright 2014

 

Chapter 111

 

Jessi

 

Sometimes life just sucks.  When I woke up this morning, everyone was gone.  Nick left a note that he and AJ were going golfing with the guys and Hanna Jo and Denise went shopping.  I’m sitting here in bed brooding because no one wanted to wake me up to tag along.

 

I grab my phone, thinking I’ll call Hanna Jo or Nick. Then I toss it aside.  Nope.  They didn’t want me to spend the day with them; I’m not chasing them down.  I jump out of bed and head for the shower.  It’s only the day before my wedding.  Why would I need someone to spend time with me?

 

After a quick shower and donning shorts and a tank top, I grab a local tourist guide book from the desk.  I close my eyes and let the book fall open.  When I look down, I have to smile.  Grabbing my purse and sunglasses, I head for the door.  I stop momentarily to debate leaving a note.  Finally I decide I will.  It’s a simple note. 

 

                        “I’ll be back later.  Jessi”

 

Once in the lobby, I ask the doorman to get me a cab. When I tell the driver where I want to go, he takes off, chatting happily.  When we finally make it to my destination, I’ve been told his entire life story.  More than I wanted to know, yes, but he was a nice enough guy.

 

As I walk up to the entrance, a pretty young girl says, “Aloha, welcome to the Honolulu Zoo.”

 

After an hour of walking, I see a concession stand and head for it.  While the weather has been pleasurable, walking in the sun has made me thirsty.  I buy a frozen Coke and the girl at the register suggests I duck into a souvenir shop for a hat. 

 

I didn’t think about the sun.  I go into a shop and look around.  Mostly straw hats, which do nothing for me.  So I meander over to a wall filled with colorful bucket hats.  I pick one out with a tropical fish pattern on it and try it on.  When I look in the mirror, my eyes almost bug out of my head.  Barely an hour in the sun and my face is bright pink. 

 

I find the sales lady and ask if they sell sunscreen or something that might take the sting out of my face.  She smiles and says, “Of course we do.  A lot of haoles underestimate the strength of the sun on the island.”


I look at her curiously.  “What’s a haole?”

 

She smiles warmly.  “It means mainlander. Is this your first visit to Hawaii?”

 

I nod shyly.  “I guess that’s kind of obvious.”

 

Her smile widens. “Is there anything else I can help you find?”

 

I shake my head.  “No, but is there a restroom close?  I need to put on this sunscreen and do something with my face?”

 

She smiles. “Use the dressing room.  It’s cooler.”

 

After protecting the rest of my skin from the sun, I put my hat on my head, hang my shopping bag on my arm and head out to see some more animals.  Just as I make it to the giraffe exhibit, my phone rings. I debate ignoring it, but I know it will only make things worse. I pull it from my pocket, my heartbeat quickening when I see it’s Nick.  I answer with a soft, “Hello?”

 

He fairly shouts into the phone.  “Are you ok? Where are you?”

 

I feel my anger bubble to the surface.  “I’m sight-seeing.  Why?”

 

He sounds confused.  “What’s wrong?  Why didn’t you wait for me?”

 

I shake my head, feeling tears sting my eyes.  Maybe its years of thinking of myself as worthless that makes me say, “Why should I?  No one bothered to wake me up for what YOU had planned today. So I made my own plans.”

 

His voice softens.  “Jessi…Honey, where are you?”

 

I see the two giraffes in the enclosure lean close and rub their faces against one another.  That simple gesture is my undoing.  I don’t even try to hide the sadness in my voice. “Spending the day before my wedding alone.” 

 

I hang up and turn the phone off.  I know he’ll call back, but dammit all to hell this hurts.  I know I’ve taken some things with Nick the wrong way, but the day before our wedding he abandons me?  For golf? 

 

 

After spending several hours at the zoo, I head out. Once in the cab heading back to the hotel, I turn my phone back on.  There’s several missed calls from Nick and Hanna Jo.  And several text messages that range from angry to worried.  Toward the bottom of the texts is one from Thad.  “Hey Jess.  Our plane lands at 6:00.  How about dinner?”

 

I smile, thinking about Thad.  I check my watch.  4:30. I lean forward. “I’m sorry; could you take me to the airport?”

 

He nods.  “Of course, we’re going in the right direction anyway.”

 

As we speed along down the road, I dig through my phone to figure out which airline Nick had them flying in on.  After giving the driver the information, I sit back and stare out the window.

 

In no time, he’s stopping to let me out at a gate.  After paying him, he says, “Want me to wait?”

 

I check my watch.  “No, thank you though.  They won’t be here for forty-five minutes.”

 

After I get out, I head into the building and check the board for Thad’s flight number.  When I don’t see it, I start to worry.  I go to the information desk and ask for help.  I’m really puzzled when the woman says, “Ma’am that flight landed over four hours ago.”

 

I sigh, wondering if Thad made a mistake on the time or if I misread it.  When I turn to leave, I run right into someone. I look up to apologize, shocked to see Nick staring down at me.  “I knew you’d come here.”

 

I sigh.  “Why are you…you had Thad send the message?”

 

He nods.  “You weren’t answering me.  You didn’t answer Hanna Jo.”

 

I pull away and he lets go of me.  “I didn’t want to interrupt your plans for the day.”

 

I walk away and he follows me closely.  “Jessi, will you stop and listen?”

 

I stop and turn.  “What?”

 

He reaches for my hand.  “I’m sorry.”

 

I do a double take. “What?”

 

He sighs.  “I’m sorry.  As late as we were out I thought you’d sleep longer.  I wanted to surprise you.”

 

I pull my hand away and move to a bench to sit.  He sits beside me but doesn’t make a move to take my hand again.  “How is golfing surprising me?”

 

He sighs.  “I wasn’t golfing.  I wanted to buy you a wedding present. I really thought I’d be back before you woke up.  It was stupid not to tell you I’d only be gone a little while.”

 

I stare at the ground.  Part of me is ashamed at how I acted, but the biggest part of me is still hurt.  I sniffle and manage to whisper, “It doesn’t matter.”

 

He slides off the bench and drops to his knees in front of me.  “Jessi, it does matter.  It’s the day before our wedding and once again, I’ve been a complete jack ass.  This is all on me Baby, I’m sorry.  I’m so sorry.”

 

I stare into his eyes, tears trickling down my cheeks.  He brushes them away gently.  I manage to whisper, “Nick…I’m just not that strong right now.  I don’t know how much more I can take.”

 

He crushes me in his arms.  “Darling, it’s my fault.  I swear to God, telling you I was golfing was stupid.  I just…wanted to surprise you.”

 

I wind my arms around his neck and whisper, “Nick I…don’t want to be one of those clingy wives that has to know your every move…but…”

 

He kisses my shoulder.  “Shh.  After everything you’ve been through, you’re allowed to be clingy.  I have to remember I’m not allowed to be stupid.”  He leans back and cups my face.  “Please say you forgive me.”

 

I nod slowly, hiccupping through another sob.  He pulls me into his arms and whispers, “Come on Sweetheart.  Please don’t cry.  I can’t take it.”

 

When my sobs subside, he leads me to the car he’s rented.  Once I’m nestled in the passenger seat, he climbs in the driver’s seat.  I reach out slowly and touch his hand.  He turns his hand to entwine his fingers with mine.  “What did you end up doing today? Looks like you got some sun.”

 

I blush, pulling the hat off my head and fluffing my hair.  “I went to the zoo.”

 

He does a double take. “You’re kidding.  For real?”  I nod and he says, “Did you enjoy it?”

 

I shrug and whisper, “Sort of. I’ve always loved animals.”

 

He brings my hand to his lips to kiss it gently.  “Jessi, I think tonight I want you all to myself.  If you don’t mind.”

 

I stare into his eyes, my heart near bursting with love.  I nod slowly.  “I think…I need…that.”

 

He leans closer to me, tears pooling in his eyes.  “I love you Jessi.”

 

I meet him half way and kiss him softly.  “I love you too.”