Project: nkotBSB

By Dottie

Copyright 2013

Chapter 39

Jessi

I stomp into my bedroom and shut the door forcefully. I slam back a shot before I start throwing more of my clothes into a suitcase.  I should have known that bastard would rat me out now that it’s over.  So high and mighty, Mr. Thaddeus Westcott! The prick wanted me to be isolated and now that I WANT to be alone, he calls and tells them where I’m at. The hypocrite!

Just as I pour another shot, my door opens and Hanna Jo storms in. “Jessi, what in the world is wrong with you? You act like you hate me!”

I sniffle, gulping down my shot.  “I fucking hate everyone. I’m better off alone.”

She grabs my arms and shakes me. “What the hell are you talking about?”

I stare into her eyes and shame floods my body. I drop my head. “Hanna Jo…” I hiccup and struggle to catch my breath. “Please just go. Everyone will be happier without me around. You’ll all be better off and you and Nick...” I gasp for air. “You and Nick can get on with your lives.”

I move to the window and stare out.  The sun is setting and the sky is purple, pink and orange. Any other day I’d be in awe of the beauty before me.  Today, I just don’t care.

Hanna Jo grabs my arm and spins me around. “What the fuck do you mean Nick and I can get on with our lives?”

I can’t answer.  She cursed…and very well I might add.  Without thinking, I mutter, “You cursed Hanna Jo. You actually said fuck.”

She crosses her arms and glares at me. “Well, you’re pissing me off! What’s wrong with you? Mr. Westcott says it’s over, that you can come back and you don’t want to? You act like I’m you enemy.  You’re drunk and you look like you haven’t slept in days. What’s going on Jess? TALK to me!”

I grab my laptop from the bed and throw it at her. “I SAW how you and Nick were looking at each other when you landed in Melbourne!”

She manages to catch the computer. She stares at me with her mouth open.  “Nick and me?  Are you KIDDING? For the love of God, Jessi, he’s all about YOU! Yes, he and I became good friends after you left, but…nothing happened!”

Once again, I feel shame wash over me.  I flop down on the bed and roll over on my side.  Grabbing a pillow, I let the sobs pour out of my body.  Why did I do that?  I know Hanna Jo better than I know myself.  She wouldn’t have…not with Nick.  Not knowing how I feel about him.  But how do I feel about him? I didn’t want to fall in love.  Did I?

I feel her sit behind me and she rubs my back.  “Jessi, stop crying.  Come on, talk to me.”

I sit up and turn to face her. We fall into each other’s arms and I whisper, “I’m so sorry, Ho Jo.”

We cry together for I don’t know how long.  When we finally part, she whispers, “Jessi, you’ve lost weight.”

I grimace.  “I didn’t feel much like eating.”

She smiles at me. “Come on, let’s go make something to eat and you can tell me what you’ve been doing here the last few weeks.”

While she sautés chicken in rosemary and olive oil, I pull a bag of frozen vegetables from the freezer and tell her about Wesley and the trial.  She seems as shocked as I was about Mark Wahlberg.  “So if he’s part of the mob and Paul is, I guess Donnie could be to?”

I shrug.  “I don’t know Ho Jo.  They can’t find a lot on him.  Thad thinks I’m safe.  He says they are small time in the mob family and that they are going to try to flip them to get the head of the family. They have Paul on tape doing…what he did with me.  If he causes problems, he can still go to jail.”

As we sit down to eat, she asks quietly, “What about Donnie? What if he is…?”

I think a minute and say, “If he tries anything, I’ll fuck his life up good.  I’m not going to spend the rest of my life in hiding because of a piece of shit like his brother Paul.  I can’t.”

She takes long drink of wine before saying, “And Nick?”

I push a carrot around on my plate. “I don’t know, Hanna.  I know he probably hates me for running like I did, but I had to.”  I meet her gaze.  “I’m so sorry for leaving the way I did.  I had no choice once Paul knew where I was, I had to keep you safe.”

She waves off my apology.  “What’s done is done. I know why you did it. I just wish you had told me.”

I shake my head sadly. “I couldn’t.  Hanna if you had known I came here, you would have been in danger.”  When she nods I sigh. She understands.  “OK, so what’s going on with AJ? I see he taught you how to cuss. What else has Mr. Bad Boy been teaching you?”

She blushes, but the smile on her face tells me AJ took VERY good care of her while I was gone.  I’ll have to remember to thank him for that.  “He…well, he did teach me a lot.”

I giggle uncontrollably.  “Did he turn you into a nymphomaniac?  Have you fucked him everywhere possible? Did he do you doggy style? Come on, I need details here!”

Her blush deepens. “Jessi, I swear, can’t I have any secrets?”

My mouth drops open. “HE DID DO YOU DOGGY STYLE! How was it?  Come on, details, I’m dying to know!”

She stands and says, “You seriously want to know about…umm…my sex life with AJ?”

I’m still giggling as I join her at the sink. While I load the dishwasher, I say, “No.  I really don’t.  I’m just so happy he took care of you after I left.”

She glares at me.  “I can take care of myself, you know!”

I nod. “I know, I know…but Hanna Jo, look at you.  You’re HAPPY!  In all the time I’ve known you, you never truly looked happy. Now you do.”

She smiles shyly.  “I care so much about him, it scares me.  What if it’s just a fling and after the tour is over we’re done?”

I think about Nick. I have the same fears. Especially since I ran without saying goodbye.  “I don’t think AJ will be like that. Nick on the other hand…”

She cuts me off quickly.  “Nick went crazy when you left. He’s smitten with you Jessi, don’t ever doubt it.”

I sigh.  We take a bottle of wine and two glasses out onto the deck.  Once we’re settled, I pour us each a glass. “OK, so tell me about the fight at the airport.” 

We spend the rest of the night with her catching me up on tour news. AJ calls her after the show and says Nick wants to talk to me, but I can’t. I’m not ready for that.  I slip into my bedroom, leaving Hanna Jo alone to talk to AJ.

When she comes in later, she says Nick sent me a message.  She hands me her phone.  It simply says, “I understand. I’m not mad. Please come back.”

She gives me a watery smile and says, “Will you go back with me?”

I shrug, but before I can respond, the doorbell rings.  Why would it be ringing this late at night?  Before I have time to think, I hear a voice call out, “Jessi, it’s Wesley, we have a problem.”

Fear bubbles up inside me. Hanna Jo clutches my hand tightly as we walk to the door.  I open it slowly and I can feel the blood drain from my face.  There stands Wesley.  Behind Paul Wahlberg.  “Hello, Jessica.”