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The King Has Returned


Remus poked his head out of the tunnel at the foot of the Whomping Willow, looking around, then climbed out carefully. He knelt on the grass a moment, then got to his feet, and hurried fro beneath the branches. He walked up the stone steps to the castle, and into the front doors. Everyone was heading into the Great Hall for lunch, and normally - being as famished as he was, Remus would’ve followed them, but today he had something far more important to do first.

He went upstairs, carefully sticking against the wall, trying to remain as inconspicuous as possible. He headed up the moving staircase slowly, taking his time at the landings as they separated and hurrying as they linked. Halfway down, he ran into James and Peter on their way to the Great Hall. “Hey - guys - come back to the dormitory with me a minute first,” Remus requested when he reached them. “Please?”

“Lunch, though,” Peter whined.

“I need your help with something. It’s important.”

James looked exhausted - nearly as much as Remus knew he looked. His eyes were dark rings and he had a general air of somebody that hadn’t slept. “Alright,” he muttered. “C’mon, Pete.” James turned back around and started back up the steps.

“But lunch,” Peter said.

“Bloody hell, Pete, we’ll get lunch - just in a minute, alright? C’mon,” James snapped.

Peter sighed and followed after. “You haven’t even eaten breakfast yet - either of you - and you really need to eat…”

James rolled his tired eyes.

“Why didn’t you eat breakfast?” Remus asked.

“I wasn’t back yet,” murmured James.

“Back from what?”

“Long story…” he shook his head.

There was a sneeze.

“Bless you,” all three of them said at once. They looked at each other in confusion.

Remus turned first, red, “C’mon, hurry. Up to the dormitory.”

James eyed him a moment, then sped up, waving for Peter, and hurrying, a feeling of understanding beginning to swell up in him. “Potter’s Birthday,” he told the Fat Lady as they approached.

“Not anymore,” she yawned, “New password’s going to be Giant Squid,” and she swung open for them, still yawning.

The common room was empty - everyone had gone downstairs already, so the moment they were through the portrait hole, Sirius tore off the invisibility cloak. “BEHOLD!! THE KING HAS RETURNED TO HIS CASTLE!!!!”

Peter’s eyes popped open and he stared, dumbfounded at the place where Sirius had appeared. “Sirius?!” he gasped, “What’re you - how did you --”

James quickly hugged his mate, slapping him on the back and grinning.

“Got here in time for Moony,” Sirius explained. If James and Remus looked exhausted, Sirius looked three times as much. His face was pale and gaunt and his hair was limp, not styled at all, and his usual good looks had faded slightly from lack of nourishment and proper rest. “He snuck me in.” Sirius held up the invisibility cloak.

“Blimey.” James grinned, “Lucky you took it, Moony.”

“Lucky you have it, Prongs,” Remus answered.

“Did you really run here all the way from London?” Peter asked in awe.

“Yes, as Snuffles mostly,” Sirius answered, “I followed the tracks for the Express. It was a long journey. You have no idea how much I appreciate that ruddy train now!”

James, Peter, and Remus laughed.

“I’d do anything for a mattress about now,” Sirius said.

“Well c’mon then,” James answered, “Right up here.” He led the way up to the dormitory and though Peter very much wanted to point out lunch again, he followed along without actually saying it. The moment they stepped into the dorm, Sirius walked straight across the room - without a pause - and fell into Remus’s bed.

Remus laughed. “Idiot,” he mumbled.

Peter said, “But your bed’s --”

“Bloody hell, I’ve done nothing but think of this mattress for a month,” moaned Sirius as his back landed hard against the duvet.

James and Peter both flushed and looked away as Remus laughed.

Sirius looked over, grinning, knowing he was making the other two uncomfortable - but really that was half the fun of it - and he said, “What? You lot don’t want to hear about how much I bloody miss soft bedding?”

James murmured, “Missed the bedding my arse, my dad bloody loves Snuffles, you probably ate out off mum’s best china and slept on your very own bed.”

Sirius’s eyes twinkled.

“Don’t let him fool you lot, he’s been laying in the lap of luxury at the Potter house, I promise you that,” James said.

“Doesn’t mean I didn’t miss the Moony Mattress,” Sirius said, smirking, “Or rather what’s usually in it.” He looked at Remus.

“Alright. Lunch,” James said.

Peter looked up. “That’s what I’ve been saying for the last half hour.”

“Yeah, well, I’ve a feeling this -” he waved at Sirius, “- is what Rey needed us for. So. Lunch.” He nodded to the door.

Sirius snuggled against the pillows and stuck one hand up behind his head, “Bring me back something. Something covered in gravy! And potatoes! AND CARROTS!” he called as Peter and James left the room. He looked at Remus. “Aren’t you going to eat?” he asked.

Remus shook his head. “I’ll eat with you when those guys get back,” he replied, and he climbed over Sirius and onto the far side of the bed, curling himself right around Sirus Black and pressing his face into Sirius’s body. He didn’t smell like he usually did - he smelled stronger of the woods and of dog and general body odor, but it was still laced with the essence of Sirius and Remus was good with the essence. He closed his eyes.

“Alright, there Moony,” said Sirius, and he slid his arm ‘round Remus from beneath and over his back, his fingers grazing along the back of Remus’s shirt. Sirius took a deep breath.

“I’m not hogging the space,” Remus pointed out.

“I’d bloody fight you for it right now,” laughed Sirius.

“You’d never fight me,” Remus replied. Then, after a pause, “You know I’d ruddy win.”

Sirius guffawed loudly, “In a duel?”

“Mhm.”

“I rather think not.”

“Think all you want, but I would.” Remus’s voice was a murmur, “You’d never have the guts to kill me to end it.”

“Nor would you.”

“I guess nobody would really win, then,” Remus said.

After a few long moments, Sirius muttered, “I’d let you win, Moony, if you wanted to.”

Remus was silent for several more long moments, then he murmured, with a sleepy smile, “I told you I’d win.”

Sirius laughed loudly.




After lunch, Peter and James each carried as much as they could possibly cram into their pockets for food, and hurried back to the dormitory before their afternoon class. They deposited all the food on the desks, careful not to wake the two sleeping boys, and grabbed their books before heading off quickly to class. They ended up late, but they made up some tosh about Peter tripping on one of the disappearing steps and James heroically saving his life and everyone in the class - save for Lily who clearly knew something else was up by the raised eyebrow she sent James’s direction - seemed rather impressed, so Professor Kettleburn didn’t get too upset with them.

“What’s really going on?” she asked as they walked back across the grounds after Kettleburn’s class had ended, she eyed James suspiciously.

James grinned, “You’re on a need-to-know basis, Evans. And you don’t need-to-know.” James sped up away from her, running off across the grounds.

She looked at Peter.

Peter shrugged and ran after James before she could press him for answers. He was never very good at keeping secrets.

Back at the dorm, Sirius and Remus had woken up, eaten all the food the boys had left them, snogged a bit, and now were sitting up on the bed playing a muggle card game called Slap Jack that Remus used to play with his mum that had Sirius absolutely wildly flailing about, slapping the bed, sending cards flying every which way, like a crazy person when they came through the door. James blinked in surprise as several cards hit him as he walked through the door. “I WON! I WON! I BLOODY WON!” Sirius shouted, bouncing up and down.

Remus laughed, “Bloody hell!”

“YOU MIGHT WIN IN A DUEL, BUT THIS I WON!”

“Yes, Slap Jack will save your life, blimey!” Remus looked over at James with a smile. “Hullo,” he said. “May I return him to your parents now? I forgot how ruddy nice the peace and quiet was.”

James snorted, “You bought and paid for that thing, it’s all yours for keepsies. No returns or exchanges.”

Peter squeezed ‘round James and hurried to his desk to deposit all his books.

“But it came damaged,” Remus complained as Sirius was doing a little jig, throwing the cards that remained on the bed all over the place, like a playing card confetti.

James laughed, “It was damaged long before it was yours. I think it came into the world that way.”

Sirius shook his head, “I was quite normal once.” He climbed onto Peter’s bed, making Peter, who had laid on it just a moment before, squeak with surprise as Sirius stood over him, holding his hand up like he was some sort of statue, “‘TWAS BUT FOUR AND A HALF YEARS AGO…. I WAS A PERFECTLY NORMAL LAD….”

James snorted.

“-- LIVING A PERFECTLY NORMAL LIFE ---”

“In a house loaded with Death Eaters, yeah, go on then?” James interrupted, laughing.

“-- I WAS AN INNOCENT, SWEET LITTLE LAD --”

“You were never innocent, this story’s a load of crock,” laughed Remus.

“-- AND THEN, THERE CAME THE FATEFUL DAY… ABOARD THE HOGWARTS EXPRESS…”

“If you’re about to blame your oddness on us....” Peter said, shaking his head.

“-- WHERE I MET THREE BLOKES WHO ---”

And suddenly the door swung open and there was Frank Longbottom. “I BLOODY KNEW I KNEW THAT VOICE!!!” he cried and he bound across the fourth year dormitory, followed by a grinning Andy Woodhouse, “I said - Andy, there’s nobody in this ruddy world that could be as loud as all that without it being Sirius Black himself!! HOW THE HELL’D YOU GET BACK?” Frank was beaming.

“Oh blimey, it’s a long… tail,” Sirius said. Frank of course didn’t get the pun, but the Marauders did, and they all laughed as Frank embraced Sirius like a brother and Sirius grinned over his shoulder, winking at Remus.