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Thanks to Anita, dancinpacer03, stephanie, frackandbonechick, Anastacia and Sta for reviewing 25. Enjoy 26 and I can't wait to hear what everyone thinks! lol.

Chapter Twenty-Six

Amber groaned inwardly to herself after picking up yet another semi-thick magazine from the small stack on her king-sized hotel bed with her picture on the cover before tossing it aside on the floor to the pile of others.

Ever since word about her suddenly being with the Backstreet Boys had gotten around and people started to notice her, which had pretty much been the night of the first show, the Boys and sometimes she, had been interviewed by multiple magazines. One thing was the same though when it came to each one. Her picture appeared on the cover along with the Boys, the photograph in bright colors and standing out amongst the others, or so it seemed.

Amber was not happy in the least that her experience, traumatic as it had been, was being made in to a story. It was out in the open now, her personal life out and exposed for the whole world to read about. The fact that her photo was on the cover and inside the pages of just about ever big-name magazine frightened her, for it meant that her rapist was more likely to trace her now. The fact that he was in prison caused her no comfort, for prisoners escaped on occasion.

Although their attempt had not worked, the Boys had tried to argue against each and every interview, wanting to protect their new friends privacy. Their management and publicist, on the other hand, had thought the interviews to be a good idea, saying it would be good for their reputation. After much arguing, saying that Amber would not be comfortable with it, the higher-ups had won in the end. The Boys had apologized profusely to her, but it still did not change things.

Reaching beside her to move on to the next magazine, she realized that her pile had already been gone through and there were none left for her to choose from. She hadn’t even opened one. With a sigh, she scooted on her stomach to the edge of the bed to peer over the edge to the ground at ten pictures of herself staring up at her, strewn across the floor. There was YM, US, Seventeen, Rolling Stone, People and Teen People, to name a few. All interviews had been done in a three day span, causing all of them no free time and little or no sleep. By the beginning of the next week, that day, the issues had been distributed to stores, sitting on the shelves. In a matter of days, everyone would recognize her on the streets.

There was only a little under a week and a half left for the tour. Amber was both excited and sad that it was almost over. She was excited for the fact that she’d no longer be out in the open for all to see. With every show, more and more people had begun to noticed her, wondering who she was, some acting as if she did not belong, others just staring in curiosity. The sadness came in to play though because she loved hearing the Boys sing. She also found always being on the move exhilarating and somewhat thrilling. She loved seeing new places all the time. To be honest, the only part of touring around that she thoroughly disliked was having the constant cameras shoved in her fact. Therefore, her emitions were mixed when it came to the tour ending.

Amber knew that in the past eleven days, she’d improved quite significantly on her social status with the Boys. She spoked with A.J. on a regular basis now, although she still didn’t trust him as much as she did Nick. She found through observation that Kevin really was kind -hearted and was extremely patient when it came to her opening up. He never got irritated and frustrated with her. Because of this, she would sometimes exchange a few words with him, slowly becoming more comfortable when around him. Then there was Howie and Brian. She hadn’t really said more to them then “Hi,” and “Fine,” when asked how she was doing. She knew that she couldn’t keep up on being afraid forever, but the rape had only been a month ago. She figured that it was only natural for her to still be afraid, and even though she had not had a panic attack recently, she knew for a fact that there would be more to come with time.

Amber rolled over on to her back, letting her head hang upside down off of the edge of the bed. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.

“Come in,” Amber called, hoping that it was either Nick or A.J.

“I would if I had a key to your room,” came Nick’s distinctive voice.

“Oh,” Amber muttered, embarrassed that for a moment, she had forgotten where they were. She flipped back over, getting to her feet too quickly. She swayed back and forth for a moment from her head-rush before quickly walking to the door to open it and let Nick in.

“Hey,” he grinned, walking into the room without an invitation. He knew he didn’t need one. He advanced further in to the room as Amber let the door close behind them and followed him in to the room. Amber stopped when she saw Nick staring at the magazines littering the floor. He let out a low whistle before saying, “Damn, where did you get all of these?”

He bent down to pick one up, examining the cover, “How...why...when...how are these out already?” Nick stuttered, “I mean, we just did the damned interviews last week.”

Amber shrugged, “I got them down at the gift shop this morning while I was looking around,” she told him, “But I couldn’t bring myself to read the articles or interviews.”

Nick looked completely disgusted, “I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t read anything in here either. It’s ridiculous that we had to do these against all of our will anyways. It’s all bull shit.”

He carelessly, and somewhat roughly, threw the magazine down as if it was boiling hot to the touch, the pages bending and folding from the force that it hit the ground with, skidding across the floor and under the bed partway.

“Anyways,” Nick started, letting his fingers trail against the dresser top before moving to the bed and sitting down. He looked up at Amber.

“Was there anything you needed,” Amber asked, wincing because her tone came out impatient and somewhat harsh, two things she hadn’t intended to imply. She was glad for the visit from Nick. It helped to get her mind off of things. Especially the most recent of events.

“Yes, actually there was,” Nick replied, not taking offence to her tone, either that not noticing it at all. Either way, Amber was glad, “The tour is ending soon, and, well, I was just wondering if you knew what you were going to do after it was over.”

He was avoiding her gaze, and Amber wondered why he was so nervous, but found it to be cute. However, his question had caught her off guard, and it was all she could do to not have any sarcasm in her answer. His question she found to be odd, for he should know that she had nowhere to go. She wondered if he was hinting that she was no longer welcome to be with them after the next ten days. It seemed to be what he was implying.

“I don’t really know,” she answered, “I don’t really know anybody that I could stay with or go to. So, no, I guess I don’t know what I’m doing, but I can figure it out.”

“That’s good..I mean, the guys and I all want you to know that you’re welcome to stay with any one of us. Brian and Kevin are both married, and have wives they’ll be going back to..Leighanne and Kristen. They thought maybe you and their wives would get along, if you wanted to try that out for awhile, at least.”

Amber bit her lip. Kevin and Brian’s offers were well intentioned, and she thought that just maybe she would get along good with Leighanne and Kristen, but would feel odd going off with either of them for two reasons. The first one was that she hardly spoke to them. The second was she didn’t want to feel like an intrusion to either relationship, butting in where she did not belong.

“Nah,” she replied, “That’s okay. I get along with your sisters really well, and they’re more my age...plus I won’t be overstepping my boundaries on someone’s marriage.”

Nick chuckled at that, “You wouldn’t be anyways. They offered, Amber.” he sighed, “A.J. would love to have you stay with him.”

“He’s nice and all, but he’s trying way too hard to get me to open up to him,” Amber stated, causing Nick to break out into a fit of hyena laughter, “Seriously. If it hadn’t been for him always trying to get me to talk to him, I probably would have much sooner.

Nick shrugged, “It’s your choice. What about Howie?”

“Haven’t talked to him at all hardly,” Amber stated, “Plus, he doesn’t seem to want me around. He hasn’t made a point to talk.”

Nick shook his head, “There’s no winning with you girl. Aje tries too hard, Howie doesn’t try enough. Dude...” his voice trailed off as Amber slapped him jokingly, “Howie is just giving you your space. He doesn’t want to pry or make you feel forced or rushed.”

Amber just shrugged, “Either way.”

“You’re welcome to stay with me again,” Nick offered, “I don’t know how often the sibs will be around, but we’re pretty good friends, right?”

Amber nodded, “I consider you like, a big brother and best friend.”

Nick laughed, “Same goes, lil sis,” he joked, “So you’re coming with me?” he asked, just to make sure that he was getting the information correctly.

“Yeah, I guess so,” Amber smiled, happy that her main stressor was off of her back now, “How long are breaks after tours normally?” she then asked.

“Depends...sometimes months, sometimes year or so, sometimes a few weeks before we’re back and recording again...or it could be. Hasn’t been for us.”

Amber was about to reply when the phone suddenly rang, causing her to jump. She looked at Nick with eyes wide in fright. She hadn’t a clue who would be calling her. Only one thing came to mind, as she tried to find her voice as the phone continued to ring.

“Could you please get it?” she asked pleadingly, “What if it’s him...” she added, referring to the man who had stolen her innocence and caused her vulnerability.”

Nick gave her a kind, sympathetic smile as he reached over and grabbed the phone, bringing it to his ear.

“Hello?” he asked.

“Hi, is Amber there?” came a woman’s voice that Nick didn’t recognize at all.

“Can I ask who’s calling, please,” Nick was sure to put emphasis on the last word.

“None of your business. Just put her on the phone.”

Nick’s eyes widened at the rudeness of the lady as he hesitantly took the phone from his ear and held it out to Amber, who recoiled in terror.

“It’s some woman,” he informed her with a shrug, “Probably another reporter. If it is, just hang up on her. Whoever it is needs to get the stick out of her ass and put her rotten attitude in check.” he shook his head in annoyance.

Amber took the phone with shaking hands, closing her eyes and taking in a deep breath. She knew that it had been too good to be true for her to go this long without an episode that cause her to become shaken. She brought it to her ear slowly.

“Yes?” she asked into the phone, her voice
almost a complete whisper.

“Amber, is that you sweetie?” a chipper voice asked.

Amber’s stomach churned at the sound of the voice. It was one that she knew all to well. One she would have been perfectly happy with never hearing again in her entire being.

“Yes,” she answered in monotone, “What do you want, mother?”

“To see how you are.” she asked with false cheerfulness. Her tone told Amber that she wanted something, and it was definitely not to take back the hurtful things that she had done.

“How did you find me?” she asked the first question that came to mind.

“I knew you were with that little boy band,”

“Vocal group,” Amber corrected cooly, remembering how Kevin had said he hated with people referred to them as a boy band.

“Yes, whatever,” her mother stated, “I saw your picture on some magazine covers this morning at the grocery store. I about choked. I did some research and found the hotel you were at, and found you.”

“Joy,” Amber muttered with a scowl. Her mother had always been smart. She should have known right off what the woman had done to find a way to contact her.

“I was hoping you and your new friends would like to come here and visit with me.”

“What do you want?”

“Nothing,” Mrs. Harris said all too quickly.

“That’s bullshit,” Amber spat, “Why did you abandon me a month ago then?” she questioned, feeling bold and putting the woman on the spot.

“It was...it...you being raped just shocked us, is all,” the woman answered.

“You had a week to get to the hospital and see me,” Amber said, “A week is plenty of time. Now you want something from me. You know what? Rot in hell.”

“Amber,” Mrs. Harris gasped, flabbergasted, “Is that any way to speak to your mother now?”

“You’re not my mother,” she spoke with no remorse, “Not anymore. Now leave me the hell alone, forever. I have a better life now...without you.”

Amber hung up the phone without waiting for a reply. She was visibly shaken, but not because she missed her mother and wanted to go back, but because she couldn’t believe the nerve of the woman.

“Are you okay?” Nick asked, causing her to jump. She had forgotten that he was there, “Who was it?”

“My mom,” she replied simply, “Stupid, evil bitch.”

Nick held out his arms, sensing that Amber needed a hug. She willingly fell in to them, burying her head in to his shoulder and crying as he rocked her and whispered words of comfort to her. Amber hated what her life had become. She hated her parents for disowning her, and wanted nothing to do with them. What they had done was beyond forgivable. Everything that had happened in the past month was suddenly swarming back upon her. She thought her life was finally getting back on track, but it was drifting off again. She was becoming more depressed, and didn’t know how much more she could take. Nothing was the same, and after that night, she wasn’t sure if anything ever would be again for her.