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After Howie and Kevin left the room, I stood and stared at the door in disbelief. I couldn't believe what Kevin had told me. It was everything that I needed to hear. Even the best script writer couldn't have told it better. It was almost too good to be real. In the land of show business, you have to be Leary when things start to fall your way. It was almost as if now I was waiting for the ax to fall.

I figured that the "ax" in my case would take the form of Brian. I never bothered to ask Kevin or Howie why Brian and AJ didn't bother to come with them to see me. I figured they had their reasons. I was surprised when Brian called me but I didn't want to get too excited about it. I did hang up on him rather abruptly and I'm sure any second thoughts he may have had about his little speech, was laid to rest by my abrupt attitude with him on the phone.

I made my way over to the bed and sat down trying to remember the exact words Kevin had used to describe how they reacted to my song. I know it was ridiculous of me to act that way, but I really was a sap at heart. It's funny how you never really understand how important someone's opinion is to you until the moment when they stop giving it. That's how I realized how much the guys meant to me. That very day in fact, is when I figured it all out...

The phone ringing pulled me out of my thoughts. I reluctantly came back to reality long enough to answer. Ready to embrace anything that Brian or anybody else was ready to say to me.

"Hello Nick speaking..."

I heard a few clicks, then a song started to play. It sounded very far away. Like a recording made from an old record player. I listened to it until the person on the other end hung up the phone. Entranced by every word of the ballad I tried to make out some kind of connection between me and the song. Yet none came.

After I hung up, I found myself humming it and trying to coax the words back into my memory. "there's a somebody I'm longing to see, I hope that he, turns out to be..."

Someone To Watch Over Me. That was the name of the song. Watchpost, watch over me maybe they were related in some way.
Maybe... I took out the journal the Mizpah lady gave to me and started to write down my thoughts. It was the first time I ever had written anything in a journal. The first but not the last.

Just then, someone knocked on my door.

"Who is it?" I asked

"It's me" He said and even though it was rather cryptic, I recognized Brian's voice. It seemed hesitant and nervous. I opened the door to meet his gaze.

"Hey" I said as we just stood there devoid of any emotions.

"Hey, can I come in?" He asked. I moved out of the way to let him into my room

He came in and sat down in a chair close to the window. I felt odd, I wasn't sure who should speak first. Luckily only after a few moments of silence Brian started some friendly banter.

"So, this is a pretty good view of the city. You can really see for miles from here." He then turned his attention to my bed where my journal was sitting. He picked it up but didn't open it.

"Cool, since when did you start writing in a journal? This is a nice one" I walked over to him and gently took it out of his hands.

"Thanks" I said as I placed it on my dresser. I sat across from him as I continued, "It was given to me by a fan. I haven't written in it yet but I plan on it." Fan? more like stalking psychopath I thought to myself. "So..you just missed Kevin and Howie. They just left."

He looked up at me. "I know, they were coming out of the elevator as we were getting in. They said that J and I shouldn't bother you because you had a lot to think about but I thought I would come up anyway." When he didn't get a reaction from me he hesitantly said "If that's okay with you." I decided to move down to the floor and fiddle with my video games.

"Whatever dude, so does that mean that J is here too?" Brian sunk down next to me on the floor.

"Yeah he came too but I told him to wait downstairs."

I laughed. "Since when does AJ do anything he is told to do?"

Brian just looked at me with a small smile on his lips.

"So..um Kevin told me what you guys did in the studio. Toasting me and all. He said it was your idea. Thanks"

"It was no problem. You sounded happy Nick. I liked the song too." He said as he gently tousled my hair.

"Brian, why are you here?" I didn't want to ruin the moment we were having but I was curious.

"To be honest with you, I don't really know." That wasn't the answer I was looking for. I didn't know what I was looking for. We both kind of just stared ahead.

"What happened Bri? We used to be so close than one day suddenly it all went away."

He looked over at me and shrugged, "I don't know Nick, sometimes things change, people change. It's just a natural progression."

"It didn't feel natural though..I mean did it? To you?" His silence was my answer.

I suddenly felt restless and stood up to head for the window and admire the view Brian had talked about.

"What do you want me to do Brian? Do YOU want me to quit?" I asked him never letting my gaze leave the window.

I heard him make his way next to me. "That's not my decision to make Nick. It's yours. But..no, I don't want you to quit." I felt a weight lifted from my shoulders when he said that.

"I don't know what I'm gonna do yet. Trish seems to think Jive wouldn't let me quit anyway. Who knows? I'm just confused I guess."

Brian placed his hand on my shoulder."Hey, I'm sorry for coming on too strong at the meeting. I didn't want to hurt you"

"Well you did hurt me." I said rather curtly not really meaning to.

"I know and I'm sorry," I looked over at him and he looked sincere.

"That's okay. No harm done," I found myself saying. We just stood there two silent forms staring out the window. Both in deep thought but neither one of us saying anything.

"Do you think we will ever be back to normal? You and me?" I asked sounding eerily like a thirteen year old boy I used to know. I could tell by the look on his face that he was searching for something witty to say.

"Depends, you were NEVER normal in the first place." Well, it wasn't exactly witty but I'll take it.

I started to feel like maybe everything was going to be okay with us. All of us. While I continued to reassure myself of this Brian made his way back over towards the bed. Yup maybe things will all work out I'm finally feeling relieved and...

I froze in my tracks and felt a chill run down my spine as Brian suddenly started to hum a song. The song. I quickly turned around to face him.

"Why are you humming that?" I asked him. He suddenly had this strange expression on his face.

"What? I love this song, it's always been one of my favorites. Someone to Watch Over Me is a classic." I just looked at him in horror. I had this urge to get him out of my room as soon as possible.

"Well, Bri, uh thanks for coming, but um I've got things to do" He looked at me with a suspicious look on his face.

"Are you kicking me out? I just got here!" I was afraid to make him mad at me but him singing that song totally creeped me out.

"Um no but I really do have some stuff to do with Trish so, if you don't mind.." I started to walk over to the front door to let him out. I opened the door for him and was unprepared for what came out of his mouth.

"Mizpah Nick"

I stood there my back to Brian with the door open unable to breathe or scream......