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17



And so our Hero gets a reprieve








Within a day of my passing out, I was back on my feet again, eager to make my way back to Nick’s room and let him know I was alright. Now that he was finally awake and aware that he had made it through the hell he had, the last thing I wanted was for him to worry about me.



At first Kevin was leery of me going back to be with Nick, but I think he realized especially after I had been SO wrong about our assailant, that the only person who could make me feel better was Nick.



“Are you okay Brian?” I looked over at my cousin as he put his hand on my shoulder, “It’s all about Nick now Kev”



“We are still allowed to worry about you”



“Don’t…I’m fine”



But I wasn’t fine, I was devastated. By fingering the wrong guy as our attacker I basically gave him enough time to leave the country if he wanted to. I had to face the fact that he was probably long gone and it was all my fault.



“I just feel like I should apologize to him or something”



“Who?”



“Derek Jones”



“Oh…Brian I’m sure he understands better then anyone else how the brain works”



“Post traumatic stress disorder” He nodded.



“Hey guys” Howie met us in the hallway as we got off the elevator and landed on Nick’s floor. He finally looked well rested. At least one of us did. It was about time!



“How are you feeling?” He asked me looking me up and down and then giving Kevin the look that was usually reserved for Nick.



“I’m good D. How’s Nick?”



“He’s doing better Brian, he’s actually alert and semi awake. The police were just in talking to him”



“He just woke up!” Howie nodded, “I know but don’t worry I was in there with him, I actually held his hand. They didn’t press him too hard just asked him if he remembered what the guy looked like”



“And what did he say? Did he remember?”



“Just that he was wearing a black mask” Black mask? Maybe that’s why he was Darth Vader in my dreams.



“How was he when they asked him? I mean was it hard for him to talk about?” Howie looked at Kevin and nodded, “A little, but luckily that’s all they asked for now. I’m sure they’ll be back. He wanted me to see if you were any better Brian, he’ll be relived when he sees you walk in”



I smiled at Howie but still had that same uneasy feeling I always had when getting close to entering Nick’s room. It was almost like I was afraid I’d get transported back in time, back to that place that I want to forget about.



Kevin sighed as he saw the detectives in the distance, “I wish the police would just leave him alone!”



“I know but they really needed some leads” I was now arguing for the police, before I would have been appalled, now I was grateful.



The two detectives who had been assigned to this case from the very beginning were standing right outside of Nick’s room. I looked down at the floor, not really eager to make eye contact with them. When Kevin finally told them what I had said earlier they were disgusted. Not making it any secret that they had suspected as much all along.



“Did Nick help at all?” Kevin asked them hopefully just before entering the room.



“Too much time has gone by so our chances are slim of ever finding this guy” They had told my cousin as if I wasn’t even there. I no longer mattered.



“We will keep on looking though…don’t worry” That time they did say it to me and all I could do was nod.



I decided to focus my attention once more on being reunited with my friend because all of the other stuff was just too depressing. When I walked in he was alert and awake patiently watching a nurse take his pulse while he had a thermometer in his mouth. He looked so much better but still far from the best.



He was pale and worn out, that much could be read in his eyes which lit up once he saw me walk into the room.



“Hey buddy” I walked over to him as he tried to say something only to be stopped by the nurse. “We’ll be done in a minute” She said giving me a nod. I walked around to the other side of the bed and sat down; his eyes followed me the whole time.



The nurse took the thermometer out of his mouth and jot down the number it read. “Does he have a fever?” Kevin asked walking up behind her.



“Just a low one, you don’t stay up too long young man…you need your sleep”



“Okay” He whispered. I don’t know what I was expecting. Well I take that back, I KNOW what I was expecting. A joke or some kind of smartass reply, the very Nick type of an answer to a command like that. His answer was so sweet and simple and untypical of Nick that I almost wanted to cry. I know that probably sounds silly but I just so desperately needed things to go back to normal now. I wanted to forget this chapter of my life and move onto the next.



After the nurse left he smiled at me, “Hi”



“Hi” It felt weird; I almost wanted to ask him how the weather was.



“Are you hurting anywhere Nick?” He turned towards my cousin and shook his head, “I’m good, they have me on a lot of medicine I think” He sounded so different, like his voice had changed or something. I wasn’t able to make out what exactly felt different but something was not the same.



He turned to face me again, “Are you okay?”



“Yes, I’m okay”



He let out a sigh; I’m sure it was of relief but in the very back of my mind I felt like it might have been regret. That maybe he was thinking oh isn’t that nice how you are fine while I am feeling like total crap.



Paranoia.



It would always be there from now on. Every little thing people will do or say I’m going to interpret the wrong way, including concern from my friend and that made me sad.



I hated what Derek Jo…I hated what that guy did to me.



Whoever he was.



“Bri?” I looked over at Nick when he said my name, I must have been zoning out.



“Yeah buddy?”



He swallowed, “I thought you were dead” He grabbed onto my hand trying his best to grip it tightly. “I really thought when he took you out of the room that…”



“I’m alive Nick, so are you” He nodded. I didn’t mean to interrupt him but at the same time I didn’t want to hear the rest of the sentence so instead I continued, “And they’ll find him and put him away forever. We’re safe now”



“Safe…” His voice drifted as he said the word, at first I thought he was falling asleep but then I realized he was looking at his arm. The one with the word MINE carved in it. The word which I placed there. Kevin noticing him gazing down at his wounds was quick to try to distract him, “Nicky are you hungry or anything? How about some food? Or if you want I can ask AJ to bring your Nintendo over here. I mean I’m sure they don’t allow that kind of thing but we can make an exception I’m sure”



“S’okay I don’t feel like playing” He placed his other hand over his arm to feel the raised word.



“Nick don’t” I begged, ready to cry but trying my hardest not to.



“I have to” Once again he whispered, softly and sounding different. Kevin glanced over at me and I stared back at him. Neither of us knew what to do. When it came to Nick, we all were never at a shortage of words to help the kid out, give him direction or advice whether he wanted it or not. Most times he was a reluctant recipient to the things we would tell him. Especially my cousin, he never wanted to hear what Kevin had to say about anything. Even AJ would find himself doling out big brotherly advice to Nick. He just had that way about him, like he needed to be looked after.



That’s why as he was rubbing his hand up and down his arm I felt so helpless as did Kevin and Howie as we watched. There was no advice we could give and nothing at all to do to make it better for him.



“I’m so sorry Nick”



“I know” Somehow that didn’t make me feel better. I wanted him to tell me don’t feel sorry it’s not your fault. By saying I know he was basically accusing me of doing that to him.



“I was ready to die for you” Kevin and Howie both looked at me as if it was a highly inappropriate thing to do but I had to say it, I had to justify to him how much he meant to me.



“Brian don’t” He said shaking his head, but it was to late the memories were back.





He was faceless after all, a man wearing a black mask, not a lab coat in site… just a black ski mask to match his black shirt and black jeans.



“I’m getting pretty tired of waiting for your answer” I looked at his gun again feeling my legs shaking. Funny how I hadn’t noticed that before. I tried to make my mouth move; I wanted to be a hero. I wanted to tell him to kill me and then leave Nick alone.



“Okay fine looks like I’ll go kill your friend first, would you like to watch” He turned around and headed for the adjoining bedroom once again. “No”



“No what? You don’t want to watch? Why not Brian you already did such a great job with the knife I thought perhaps I could take you under my wing and show you how to shoot someone in the head”



“Please don’t do this”



“It’s too late Brian I already explained this to you”



“He’s just a kid”



“Yeah? Well so are you, big deal” He opened the door and began to step inside. “Come on”



“No, please just…”



“Just what?” He was amused because he knew what I wanted to say and he also knew I was too afraid to say it.



“Me first” I finally got out while crying like a baby. “Just kill me first”



“I was wondering when and if you were going to say that” He walked all the way back into my room, “I don’t blame you…I wouldn’t want to die feeling like a coward either”



I was hyperventilating, my heart felt like it was going to just jump out of my chest and at that point I was almost wishing it would. If I was going to die today I didn’t want it to be by this man in front of me.



“Anything you want to say before you die hero?”



I opened my mouth to speak but stopped myself; I didn’t want to share my last thoughts on this earth with one of the most evil men I had ever encountered. Instead I imagined my mother standing in front of me blowing me a kiss as if I was going on the bus to school. She used to put little love notes in my lunch box and all the kids would make fun of me while secretly looking for notes of their own.



I pictured my dad and I out on the front porch of our house as he tried to whittle something out of wood. Dad always enjoyed thinking he was a carpenter when we all knew better.



As the masked man walked behind me and told me to get down on my knees I thought about my brother, the way I always wanted nothing more than to be like him. He was my idol and I loved him very much.



I heard a click behind me and closed my eyes; I felt my entire body shaking now as I saw my family in front of me. The last thing I wanted to think of before I died.



Then I heard voices coming towards us, familiar voices. “Yeah they have to be back now” It sounded like they were down the hall and coming towards the room but there was no doubt that it was AJ’s voice I heard.



The guy behind me heard it too because he quickly uncocked his gun, “Shit” He said. I was just about to yell for help when I felt something hit me in the back of the head. The last thing I remember is seeing the blue carpet as I fell towards it face first.




I looked up from my memory to see all three faces staring at me, “Brian?” I moved my head to face the voice of my best friend. Now I recognized the sound of his voice. It had the same sound I had when I thought I was going to die.



It was the sound of sadness and it would forever be heard in both of our dialects. The smallest hint of sadness even while wearing a smile. “He had asked me…” I finally was able to say once I got control of my emotions, “If I should die first or you and I said me”



“What did he do then?” Tears were starting to form in Nick’s eyes and I hated to see that. Know that I was the cause.



“He was just about to shoot me when he heard you guys coming down the hallway” Now I turned towards Howie and Kevin, “The three of you saved my life and Nick’s” Kevin looked amazed, maybe he was in his own state of shock. “We did?”



I nodded, “He must have hit me right then and there just to get out before you came”



“Thank God for that” Howie muttered as he walked closer to us, “Thank God”



I looked over at Nick and smiled at him, we were still holding onto each other. “I really thought we were going to die” He said in his whisper.



“I did too”



“How in the world did we miss him if he we were in such close proximity?” Howie asked now sounding more like a detective then a Backstreet Boy. “He was in the room with me”

I looked at Nick with questioning eyes while he continued; “He was with me” He looked down at the blanket. That’s when I realized there was so much more to this story. I only knew part of it but maybe now Nick could fill in the blanks.



After seeing the look he had on his face, I didn’t want him to though.



“Nick?” He looked over at Kevin, “Where you awake when we came inside?” He nodded.



“What happened?” I hated when everyone asked me that question and now here I was doing it to Nick, but I wanted to know…I needed to know his side of the story.


Be back on Wednesday with chapter 18