The Scar
There were 117 tiles leading up to the morgue. Kevin found that out on a day that he had chosen to keep his head down while he walked there. He was brand new to the field, in fact at that time he wasn’t even allowed to be alone with anyone, afraid that he might accidentally mess things up. He was shadowing Rob that day, and the case he had been working on was intense and ended with a slow walk to the morgue to identify a baby. The mother was so grief stricken that she could barely walk, Kevin held onto one arm of hers while Rob took the other. The sound of her sobbing was almost too much for him to take, so he looked down and counted. It helped soothe his nerves on the many occasions he had taken that long walk.
From the minute the elevator door opened to the actual swinging door leading into the place where the bodies were kept, 117 in all. He never understood why every morgue he had ever been too had the same set up, designed it seemed, to make the victim’s families suffer. No windows, no doors, no chairs until you got right outside of the actual morgue. No place to sit and rest, knowing that for so many people that long journey was the hardest one to take, that maybe they would need to stop halfway down the hall, maybe at tile 60.
When Ariana had said those words, he didn’t know exactly what to think, “Oh my God Kevin…I’m so sorry.” He had smiled at her and asked her what she had done to be sorry about; maybe he just wouldn’t allow his mind to go down any other roads. He was ready to take any blame necessary, even getting thrown off the force if it meant that, although he couldn’t quite see how anything he had done would allow Rob to take such extreme action, and Rob was out of the office anyway right?
She couldn’t bring herself to say what it was, her eyes had tears welling in them so he stood as patiently as he could and waited to find out what the problem was, it was shortly after that, Rob showed up and told him about the package.
Kevin only half listened as he spoke, trying to let the words he had just said sink in. Rob talked about receiving a call saying a mysterious, package had arrived for him. He would have ignored it, he said if it weren’t for the unmarked return address. When he asked one of the agents to open it, all hell broke loose.
When Rob was done explaining the details to Kevin he walked over and placed a hand on his shoulder, “In times like this there are no words…”
That’s when Kevin lost it, hadn’t he said that so many times to so many people? The fact that it was now being said to him was almost too much to take. “Save it Rob…I’ve heard it too many times,” He said standing up, “Where is it? I want to see?”
Rob stood up with Kevin, “Kev…it’s not a good idea.”
“You could be wrong.”
“I’m not wrong.”
“You could be!” Now his grief turning into anger.
“Kevin…please trust me.”
Kevin looked over at Rob, “I need to see.”
A few moments later, Rob brought the envelope that was inside the package to Kevin, “I told you son, you don’t have to look.” But it was too late, before the words were even out of his mouth, Kevin pulled out the contents of the envelope.
It was than that he finally allowed Rob’s words to sink in, he opened his mouth to scream but he was so consumed by his own grief nothing would come. Instead he burst into tears using Rob’s shoulder as support occasionally letting out such a grief stricken sob it could be heard throughout the rest of the office.
Howie showed up shortly after Kevin lost it. He was called immediately by Ariana and went flying back to the office to help his friend.
“Do you need me to call your mom?” he asked, finally able to control his own emotions.
Kevin couldn’t answer, he only shook his head. He wasn’t ready to let his mother know about this yet. How was he going to let his mother know about this? At this point, Rob was called out of the room, leaving the two best friends alone.
“Did you read the note Kev?” he nodded this time, taking the note and handing it to Howie who read it in horror.
“To detective Robert Martino,
Usually I address all my letters to detective Richardson but I figured since this was going to be so hard for him; I would send it to you instead.
Detective, I have done something horrible. As you can see by what I sent you, it was most unexpected. He was making me mad; constantly asking me to please let him go home, I couldn’t take it anymore so I killed him…” Howie paused there, shuddering at the words. Kevin just kept his head down, his eyes grief stricken as he listened.
“I have to admit this was not my original plan but now what’s done is done…I’ll be sending Kevin’s brother to you shortly. Please send him my condolences even though it’s his fault for letting me get him anyway…” Howie stopped and placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder, “this isn’t your fault Kevin…you know that right?”
But Kevin was beyond hearing the words; he was beyond comprehension, his mind shut off. Nick was dead and there was nothing he could do to change that.
The rest of the note just contained more babbling about how this wasn’t the end, more dead would come, he normally wouldn’t kill a boy but he needed this one…Howie stopped reading it out loud by that point, hardly able to contend with his own grief.
Finally pulling out the other thing the package contained, the overalls Nicky had been wearing all covered with blood.
“Kevin I wish I knew what to say…”
“It’s not…it can’t be true Howie…he’s playing with me.” Kevin looked up at his friend, his eyes glazed over from emptiness. When his eyes landed on the overalls he quickly looked away.
“Maybe Kevin, but maybe we should call your mom or at least Brian, you need them right now, you all need each other.”
“I can’t…not yet, I need to know for sure.”
Howie crouched down to be closer to Kevin, “We’ll get this guy Kevin. I swear on my life we’ll catch this bastard.”
“I’m not only going to catch him but I’m going to kill him.” Kevin said with so much disdain in his voice it almost scared Howie.
Rob came back shortly after that, with the news that Kevin had been dreading, the body of his baby brother had made its way down to the morgue. It was delivered shortly after the note, in a box this time addressed to Kevin.
“I went down there to see for myself.”
“Is it him?” Kevin couldn’t even look at Rob, he just stared at the floor in his office, it needed to be cleaned, there were dust bunnies everywhere.
“It’s hard to say Kev…his face was…it was beyond recognition.” Kevin closed his eyes.
“I think you need to call your mother, do you want me to do that?” Rob asked, walking over and placing his hand on Kevin’s shoulder.
“No, not yet. I need to see for myself.”
“Kevin let me do that…” Howie said not wanting his friend to have to endure the task that awaited him. “You don’t need to see Nicky like that.”
“Yes Howie…I do. I need to go see him. Make sure it is him.”
Howie and Rob exchanged concerned looks, “Okay but I’m going with you.”
Kevin looked over at his best friend, who he had been through so much with and tried to smile, would he ever be able to smile again he wondered?
“Thanks D; I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
A few minutes later the elevator door opened to the 117 tiles leading towards the morgue, the place where Nicky was waiting for his big brother.
He made the walk slowly as thoughts of Nick wafted around him, his giggle when you tickled him under the neck or on his belly. The way he mimicked everything Kevin did when he thought his older brother wasn’t looking, the most notably cute moment being the time when he caught Nicky in the bathroom talking to himself pretending to shave his beard using a can of whipped cream.
Kevin managed to go grab his mother and Brian to watch as Nicky talked about his job at the FBI as he used a chocolate chip cookie to dust the ‘shaving cream’ off of his face, at that point no longer able to hide, Kevin had run behind his brother, grabbed him off his feet and sucked some of the cream off his face as Nicky giggled away.
As they got a quarter of the way down the long hall, another memory flashed by, this time of Kevin holding his baby brother for the first time, shortly after his birth. When he was born, Kevin never thought he’d be able to relate to a child so much younger then him. He was technically old enough to be the boy’s father a job he reluctantly had to take when his own father passed on. The minute he held the baby in his arms though, the love he felt run through his veins was all consuming. He didn’t really remember that feeling with his other siblings mainly because he was still kind of young when they were born, but with Nicky, it was different.
In many ways Nick was more than a brother, he was like a son.
Kevin had experienced so many firsts with Nicky; he was there to hear his brother say his first word, “Bad” which of course was followed by his mom saying, “I hope this isn’t some kind of foreshadowing sweetheart!”
He was there when Nicky took his first steps; in fact he was walking towards his big brother, always wanting to be close to Kevin. When Jackie let go of his hands he waddled towards Kevin, smiling the whole way only to end up in his loving embrace.
It was weird, actually, how many thoughts could go through your mind walking down one long hallway. Maybe that’s what it was like at the end of the road, when you saw the white light, walking towards your final stop, reminiscing along the way.
“You okay Kevin?”
Kevin fell from his memories and glanced over at Howie, he hadn’t noticed that his friend was helping him along by holding his back.
“Kev?”
“I’m okay.”
“You sure? Because you can always go back…”
“Howie, I need to do this.”
“I know.”
So they continued onward, where once again the memories took over. It was Kevin who bought his baby brother his very first bike and on a random Saturday he took Nick to the park along with Brian to teach him how to ride a two wheeler. He was proud of himself when he finally got going, only to crash a few moments later. Instead of crying, he laughed and laughed.
As they got closer to the doors now, all the small memories hit him at once, all the times he had read to his brother, all the times he had colored with him, sang with him, and played with him. All the times Nicky had fallen asleep on his big brother’s lap as they watched Blue’s Clues together. All the hugs and all the kisses came sweeping back at him almost pushing him back towards those elevator doors.
It was too late to turn back though, so just before he pushed open the metal swinging doors he took a huge breath and said a prayer to anyone that would listen. A silent prayer begging that this person was anyone besides his baby brother. Not that he wished harm on any other children but now was a time of selfishness.
“Kevin I have to ask one last time.”
“Let’s do this,” he said as he pushed through the doors to see a small body covered by a sheet.
He recognized the shoes instantly, only because he had bought them for Nicky himself. One of the only jobs ever relegated to Kevin by his mother was taking the kids out for shoes. It was a weird, but that was one thing Jackie HATED doing more than anything else, so it became Kevin’s responsibility.
When he saw the shoes, he stopped moving forward, starting to rethink his idea. If that sheet was pulled away and he did see his brother lying there what would he do exactly? Would there ever be a day after this one, when he closed his eyes that he wouldn’t picture in his mind what he was about to see now?
The medical examiner walked over, “It’s gruesome I’m warning you Kevin, you really can’t make out an ID on the face because it was so badly beaten, I’m really sorry.”
“Why is everyone saying they are sorry when I haven’t even identified this as my brother yet?” the anger in his voice was only matched by the sadness.
“You’re right. I’ll leave you alone now.” He said nodding at Howie and Kevin, seeming very happy he wasn’t about to witness what Howie was dreading himself.
“You want me too?” Howie asked as Kevin’s hand hovered over the sheet without pulling it.
“No, I’ll do it.” He said finally taking a deep breath and pulling the sheet off of the corpse.
They were right, Scott Wilson did quite a job on the face of the child, and Kevin couldn’t even look up that way, once he realized he wouldn’t be able to tell by looking at the boy’s face. Howie looked away ready to gag, as Kevin placed the sheet back on the kid’s face.
He grabbed the boy’s hand; it was cold to the touch, yet soft. He wasn’t sure if this was Nick or not but his gut kept telling him it wasn’t. He was dressed in another one of Nick’s outfits, this time just jeans and a tee shirt but somehow he didn’t look even the slightest bit familiar. Maybe it was just him holding out hope but then he saw the scar.
He pulled the hand he was holding closer to see a small scar right by the thumb. It was then he knew for sure.
“This isn’t him D…this isn’t Nicky.”
Howie looked over at his friend. “How can you be sure?”
Kevin gently pulled the child’s arm up to show Howie the scar, “Nick didn’t have any scars on his hand.”
“Are you sure?”
“Absolutely.” Kevin let out a deep breath, one he had been holding it seemed for an eternity. He felt so relieved he almost vomited.
“Thank God…” Howie whispered as he covered the body back up.
“I knew this was a game…”
“Kevin, you have to still be prepared for the worst, I mean…you know what I mean.”
“Yes I do know what you mean but he won’t kill my brother, not when he hasn’t gotten what he wants yet.”
“Which is what?”
“I don’t know.” Kevin said recharged and once again ready for a battle.
“That’s not my brother.” He said with confidence as he met the medical examiner in the hall. He was outside the morgue talking to Rob and when the men walked out they both stopped their conversation abruptly.
“How can you be sure Kevin?” Rob asked with concern.
Kevin never stopped walking towards the elevator, thankful to be leaving that horrid place, he picked up his own hand and pointed to it, “There was a scar on that boy’s hand. Nick didn’t have one.”
“Kevin…”
“It’s not him Rob, you need to find out who it is though, and his parents need to be notified.”
“Kevin stop for a minute.” At that, Kevin stopped and turned to look at his boss. Once he had his agent’s attention he continued, “That boy’s face was beaten beyond recognition, what makes you so sure that he didn’t get that scar while he was being held?”
“Because that looked like a chicken pox scar, something that has been there for a long time…look Rob, I know you are probably thinking I’m being irrational and just hoping for the best but I’m telling you, that is not Nick.” Kevin paused for a moment just staring at his boss and then repeated himself as if to drive the point across, “It’s not him.”
Rob seeing the look of certainty in Kevin’s eyes, finally nodded his head, “Well, if you are sure…thank God.”
Kevin nodded, “I don’t want you to let anyone know though okay Rob?”
The elevator doors dinged open as the three men entered, Kevin leaving all the grief behind as they closed.
“Why?”
“Because we can’t trust anyone in the office, someone is giving this guy information, and I think I know who.”
That peaked Rob’s interest, “Kevin if you have any leads I need to know about it.”
“I don’t want to say anything yet, because I may be wrong.”
“Even still…”
“I think Tyler is in on it.”
“Tyler? That’s impossible…why Tyler?” Rob seemed surprised.
“Just because.”
“Should I pull him in for questioning you think?”
“No, not yet.”
“Kevin…”
“I think you should have people watching him Rob, that’s all I’m saying.”
“Okay, I trust you’re instincts, they have never been wrong before.”
“Thanks.”
The elevator stopped on their floor but even though Rob got out Kevin and Howie remained, “I’m going to the hospital, after this little scare I just feel like I need to be with my family right now. Plus people would be suspicious if I were to return to work after identifying my brother.”
“Okay… good idea. Kevin I’m so happy that wasn’t Nicky. I couldn’t even fathom that…”
“Thanks.”
When the door closed again Howie looked over at Kevin, “You don’t really think Tyler is a part of this do you?”
“No, but I can’t trust Rob in fact you’re the only person I do trust D. I’m hoping Maria won’t suspect a thing once she hears we are thinking Tyler is the one.”
“You think Rob is involved?”
“I don’t know what to think anymore.”
“So what now?”
“Now we go back to the hospital for a little while and then when the sun goes down, we follow Maria.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
Kevin nodded once again closing his eyes and seeing Nicky’s smile there in the dark, thankful to know that he would see that smile again and that it wasn’t just going to be a memory.
For now…
Okay there ya go! I am sorry again for the mean cliffie and I know you guys wanted a resolution. I didn't even end this chapter with a cliffie like I was going to. lol anyway hope you enjoyed. Thanks for the reviews and i'll be back next Wednesday with a new chapter of this one ;O)
