[ - ]
Table of Contents [Report This]
Printer Chapter or Story Microsoft Word Chapter or Story
- Text Size +
**Chapter Ten**

Once Anita and Nick both approached, she stopped to catch her breath. She wasn’t sure if the reason she was short on it in the first place was because of how nervous she was, or if it was because of rushing down back to her beloved boyfriend. She looked over to Nick. He didn’t seem to be in much better shape. She saw worry in his eyes along with something else. Regret? She couldn’t quite tell.

“I forgot to call the Guys to tell them,” he muttered, looking at her with wide blue eyes,

“They’d want to know too. Maybe I should go back and make phone calls...maybe...” He rambled on and on, saying things that Anita did not understand, his words becoming jumbled and running together. It was obvious that he was nervous. Extremely nervous.

“Don’t worry about that now,” Anita told him, trying to keep her voice called despite her own knotted nerves, “Let’s go see Kevin and then you can worry about calling AJ, Brian and Howie to tell them that he...that Kevin....um, he’s having complications.” Anita finally got the bitter word out.


Her heart was pounding in her chest rapidly, still unable to believe that Kevin was in this situation. She wondered how it had happened. She wondered what kind of cancer he even had. She still didn’t know, but somehow it didn’t seem all that important. They were both sick. Nothing could change that but time and medicine. On top of everything else, she was still upset with Nick for insulting her and being cruel. She felt sorry for him though and knew that she couldn’t be cruel to him in spite of everything going on. Nick was obviously distressed. She knew that even she couldn’t make things worse for him with her cruel, sarcastic, smart ass comments.

Nick nodded, closing his eyes as he tried to calm himself down and slow his too accelerated heart rate. The doctor who’d come to get them stood in front of the two still and started to go over a few basic rules. They, of course, would still have to wear the suits that were to keep all the germs out of Kevin’s way. His temperature had gone down, but he still wasn’t close to being out of the woods yet. They had to keep the visit minimal, as he was still extremely weak, for the infection had taken a lot of needed energy out of the man, even though it had only been thirty-six hours since it had happened. He’d awakened for the first time not all that long before they’d been fetched. They were warned that he was groggy from being fed medications mainly and not to take anything he said to heart. After the lecture and dressing up, the two were finally aloud in to see their friend, and what Anita hoped was still going to be her boyfriend.

Once inside of the room everything was completely silent except for a few monitoring machines making light hissing sounds and beeps. Kevin still appeared to be asleep again, making them both wonder simultaneously if they’d come at a bad time. He looked pale and ill, which he technically was. Very ill, in fact. All of this was proof of that, and the severity of it was sinking in quickly. Reality had struck.

“Oh god,” Nick choked as he viewed is friend, “Is he...is he....he looks...dead.” he sputtered, eyeing Kevin wearily as if he were in fact a corpse lying on the bed. The look on his face was next to pathetic.

“I’m...not...dead, Nick.” came a voice from the other side of the room. A low, weak, forced voice that took effort. But at the sound of his voice, Nick and Anita were at his bedside in seconds looking down at him. His eyes were closed still, his mouth contorted into a look of extreme pain and discomfort. He opened his eyes, which were clouded over, for a split second to look up at them before closing them again, “Hi.” he whispered.

Anita could feel tears welling up in her eyes, but swallowed them down. Kevin didn’t need her to be crying. He needed for her, as well as Nick, to be strong for him. So before she said anything, Anita made sure she had her voice under control. That was the most important thing, since because of the mask she was forced in to wearing, he couldn’t see facial expressions. He could only read voices, which he was good at.

“How are you feeling?” Anita asked, surprising even herself with how calm her voice had come out.

Kevin grunted lightly. Speaking would take too much effort. He felt hot and sticky yet cool and clammy all at the same time. It hurt him to breath, it hurt him to speak, it hurt him to move. He was miserable. He felt as if he were dying. When Anita bent down to give him a hug, he winced in pain but slowly and limply put one arm back around her. Everything took extreme amounts of effort.

“I was so worried about you,” Anita told him, her voice trembling slightly despite her desperate attempts not to show any bad emotion around her boyfriend.

“I...I’m sorry,” he managed to get out, “Can’t help...this.”


Anita nodded, giving one long, loud sniffle. She was losing her own battle of emotion. She felt something hot grab her hand and looked down to see Kevin grasping it lightly. He managed to get out a small squeeze without any words. The few words he’d already said had taken his breath away.

“You’re going to be okay, right?” Nick pressed, needing the reassurance straight from Kevin’s mouth himself before he’d believe it.

“Mmm...uh...yeah,” Kevin forced a weak, small and rather unconvincing smile.

Nick smiled nervously, never seeing Kevin so out of it before. He was normally on top of things. The sickness had taken so much out of his friend. He wondered if he’d ever be his normal self again. He’d been wondering this ever since the man had been admitted months before. But now, he was really wondering.

“You should’ve told a doctor when you weren’t looking good....when I mentioned it.” Anita scolded. She couldn’t help it.

Kevin said nothing, his breathing coming out a little harder. Anita could tell that he really hadn’t taken in anything she’d said. He probably hadn’t heard it, which was for the best for the time being. She looked over to Nick, who was shifting from foot to foot not knowing what to do or say. She could relate.

A few minutes later, Kevin’s doctor walked in to the room to tell the two that they’d have to leave Kevin to rest. They said their goodbyes each giving Kevin a small hug. Anita told him that she loved him, and he murmured something back along those lines, although he was already falling back in to an unconscious state. Before they left, Nick asked again if he was going to be okay, desperate for encouragement on what was obviously his roll model. Kevin assured them again before they left that he would be alright. Nick accepted this, too afraid to think anything otherwise, but there something about his tone made it so Anita didn’t believe him. She didn’t believe him at all.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Three days later, while Anita was sitting in her hospital bed watching The Young and the Restless, she heard some rustling in the doorway. Distracted, she looked over to see none other than Juanita, Madison and Taylor. She rolled her eyes and put her attention back on the television set. They weren’t worth her time. They had some nerve to show up now. They hadn’t in weeks. Not one of them. Taylor had given her a couple of phone calls, he was the only one. But not once had any of them shown up.

“Hi, Anita,” Madison greeted, her voice coming out as if nothing were wrong, “How are things?”

Anita said nothing acting as if she hadn’t heard them, but her body shook from rage underneath the covers of her bed. She tried to hide it though. She didn’t want them to see how mad she was. She wanted to act as if she didn’t care when deep down, she really did care...a lot. They’d deserted her during a time she needed them most. This proved that they really weren’t all that close. They were not the best friends that she’d originally thought. She was losing everything, including Kevin who was still in the Isolation unit.

“Are you mad at us or something?” Juanita asked, sensing the hostile vibes coming from her sick friend.


This did it for Anita. Her head flew around in the direction that the three were standing, which was now feet from her bedside. She glared at them, not able to believe what she was hearing. She knew she couldn’t hide her anger any longer. She just needed to find her voice in able to speak first.

“No, of course not. Why would I be mad at you?” Anita spat out sarcastically when she finally did, “I mean...you visit at first, then a week before the vacation, you quit coming then take off with my money. And hey, this is the first time you’ve visited since. You didn’t even call,” Taylor started to protest, “With the exception of Taylor a couple of times,” she shook her head in disgust, “You all have some nerve.”

She eyed them and could tell that they felt badly. She wondered if it would change anything though. If they did suddenly start to visit more, she knew it would be out of guilt. Not because they truly wanted to. She looked back to the TV. A new show had started. One that she wasn’t the least bit interested in, but pretended that she was in hopes that the three would get the hint and just leave her alone. She saw Nick appear in the doorway out of the corner of her eye, still in disguise. If the others did see him, they wouldn’t recognize him, but he disappeared after a hesitation before they had the chance to. Sure, Anita was still a little hurt by the things he’d said, but had wished he would have stayed just to save her from this uncomfortable, awkward silence from her ‘visitors’.

“What is up your ass, Nita?” Madison asked, “At least we’re hear, unlike Kimberly. We all do have lives, jobs, summer classes.”

Anita snorted. So since she was having chemo treatments for leukemia, she suddenly didn’t fit in to their lives? Ironic. She came last. She certainly didn’t expect to come first, but didn’t think she’d be pushed aside as something in the category of ‘nothing better to do’ either.

“Did your handsome, older man dump you or what?” Juanita asked cruelly, fully intending to hurt their friend with her harsh words.

If looks could kill, Juanita would be dead, buried and burned. But then the look turned to sadness as a couple of tears formed in her eyes. She blinked them away, but not nearly soon enough.

“I take that as a yes.” Juanita muttered.

“No, Kev did not break up with me,” Anita told them, “He’s worse off...he got an infection and is in isolation in hopes that it goes away,” she paused, really wishing she could see him, but he wasn’t allowed any visitors until later on, “If it doesn’t...well, I’d rather not think of that right now. But yes, we are still together.”

She could swear that she saw jealousy and remorse in both girls eyes. They wanted her relationship to fail because they were snobby, stuck up, spoiled brats who no guys would get near with a ten foot poll. She had been just like them once, before she’d entered the hospital, but being there had changed her and brought her back down to earth, where she’d like to stay. Looking in at them from an outsiders point of view, she never wanted to be like that again. It was unattractive and she could see why it was always just the three of them. Nobody was able to stand them.

“What is your problem?” Anita asked her once close friend, “Why is it so hard for you to believe that someone like Kevin likes me? Is it because I am bald? It is because I am young? Is it because I lost my looks? Because Kevin sees through all of that. He likes me for me. He is not like you...superficial and shallow. Maybe if you would just accept people and not look for perfection in everybody, you would find somebody worth your time too.

“Woah, chill out, Anita,” Madison stated, “You
don’t have to be so defensive.”


“You didn’t have to show up,” Anita spat back, “You come here, insult me, and pretend to be my friends, when in reality, you’re not. None of you. Why don’t you just leave. No obligations anymore, kay?”

Nothing was said for a long, excruciating moment. She could tell her temper had struck a nerve in the two girls. Taylor stood there not knowing what to do. He looked genuinely sorry. The girls, on the other hand, did not. They looked outright perturbed and in disbelief that Anita was being this way. As if she had no reason to.

‘We’re going to leave,” Madison stated, her tone snotty, taking Taylor by the hand. Anita eyed then, knowing that they were now more than just friends, “See you later.”

“Don’t bother coming back.” Anita replied with a scowl.

“Cancer’s turned you in to a drag.” Juanita growled, and Madison nodded her head vigorously in agreement. Taylor still said nothing.

“No, it’s made me see things realistically instead of in bitch vision.” Anita shouted

Juanita spun around with attitude and walked out of the room breezily with Madison following, dragging Taylor behind her. Taylor looked behind them and mouthed an “I’m sorry” Anita smiled, telling him it wasn’t his fault, and it really wasn’t. Seconds later, her visitors were gone.

“Life sucks,” Anita muttered, tears finally freeing from her eyes, “Life really plain sucks.”

And to her, it did. Even her once best friends had turned their backs on her. She just hoped that things got better soon, because she didn’t know how much longer she’d be able to live in this real life nightmare that she could take no part in planning out for herself.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anita blinked away tears as she checked herself in to her chemotherapy session. She missed having Kevin to sit next to and go through them with. It was becoming too emotional to go in every two days and not see him sitting in the seat next to an empty one. One which was reserved for her. She missed him holding her hand as she squeezed away tears of pain. She missed him more than anything though.

He had now been in isolation for nine days. She had visited him earlier that morning again. He had been asleep though, so she’d only stayed for a moment to see his chest rising and falling, assuring her he hadn’t died overnight. She’d held his hand for a few minutes, wishing that she could kiss him, but couldn’t The mask she was forced to wear restricted even that, so she put her hand to her masked lips, kissing that then placing her hand upon Kevin’s mouth. It was the best she could do.

Reaching what had become her assigned seat, she noticed a stranger in the chair that had been Kevin’s. It was a girl who looked to be in her thirties. Anita automatically put her guard up as she sat down, eyeing the woman as if she were taking over personal territory. She wondered if once Kevin was well again, if he’d take interest in this object that was more his own age. Anita was worried about not being good enough anymore. Mostly, she was worried about not being able to get through the sessions without Kevin next to her, but with a stranger. She’d been okay alone, but it would be weird having someone else taking Kevin’s place.

“Hi,” the girl greeted. There was a slight quaver in her voice. Anita assumed it was her first time. She didn’t intend on being friendly. She felt threatened by her and like she’d have to compete if she got to know the woman.

“Hi,” Anita replied stiffly.


“How long have you been here?”

“Two months.” Anita answered, not even bothering to ask the woman the same thing back. She didn’t care and wasn’t into making conversation.

Taking the hint right away, the woman looked away and back down to her magazine, Anita opening the book she’d brought. The whole time though, Anita’s mind had been on Kevin. It was hard to believe that she’d developed a relationship with her favorite member of her favorite band. She never thought she’d ever even meet them, let alone date one. It was even harder to believe that he was suffering like this. Suffering through cancer and possibly dying of it. Things like this just didn’t happen to rock stars, she’d thought. But indeed, it did. She felt privileged though to be one of the few and only people to know about him. To be able to be there for him and him there for her. If it weren’t for Kevin’s encouragement and pushing, Anita knew she’d never had made it this far. She knew that her attitude would be negative and her progression much slower. She knew that they needed each other, only he would need her more than anything, more than ever as soon as he was let back to the normal cancer floor.

The session didn’t end nearly soon enough that day. Time drug on, and when Anita was freed and helped back up to her room, which was always a given, she’d been all to happy to be able to relax. She was just nestling her head down into her pillow when Nick flew in to the room. She sighed, wondering what he wanted this time when all she wanted to do was sleep. He didn’t give her time to ask though. He spat it out in a frenzy, his eyes wide in panic. Kevin’s temperature had risen again. His health was taking another dive for the worst.