“She is pretty good...” Brian’s voice trailed of softly as he watched the video with the other three Boys, “In fact...she’s extremely good.” His words lingered in the air with a sense of regret that was causing discomfort amongst the others.
It was three days later and, out of nowhere, AJ had decided they should take a look at the Savvy 2004-2005 video that Howie had thrown in their direction like an obligation they owed to the girl. Howie wasn’t around at the moment though, in fact, he really hadn’t been around at all since the large argument that they’d had and the harsh words he had exchanged with Kevin. It was safe to say that the band versus Howie were not on good terms at all. None of them looked overly pleased to be actually watching the video, though. And it was obvious that AJ regretted putting it in to the VCR by the look on his face, for none of them still cared all that much, if at all. They were just humoring themselves.
“Was good,” Kevin corrected harshly before any of the others could comment on the once talented young woman. “She was good... Past tense... Remember, she can’t dance anymore because of her little broken leg.” His words were like venom and his tone sarcastic as if not fully grasping the seriousness of what had happened to Savannah. “I don’t know what the point of this is anyways...to make us feel guilty and like scum? It’s useless...pointless... I don’t want to be a part of it.” He growled lowly before adding, “These women are ruining our lives because Howie just can’t let it go and try to move on like the rest of us are doing. Another couple of visits to them with forced smiles on our faces and we’re going to be home free and will have our respect and good name back...if Howie will agree to that and stop being so fucking nice. If not, we’ll have other problems on our hands. But seriously, that’s all I want...is to forget and he’s making that impossible. He’s wrong... We owe them nothing... If anything, they owe us.”
Kevin’s ranting caused the others to become deathly silent, knowing that if they spoke too soon, they’d be next in line for their own personal ass chewing. Especially if they said something that Kevin disagreed with. The man was extremely temperamental at the moment and nobody dared mess with him.
“I will admit this is making me feel like scum,” Nick muttered finally, deciding to take his chances. “But only because she was good...and Howie is rubbing it in. I’m with Kevin though. I just want to move on and forget everything...the girls, the accident, this chapter of my life.”
Brian pursed his lips together as he continued to watch the tape. Savannah had definitely been elegant. They’d taken that from her. He by far didn’t want to go to the extremes that Howie had taken upon himself to do, but he did feel bad enough to wish that none of it had happened so that Savannah and Rhiannon could get back the lives that they’d been forced to leave behind... Unharmed and scratch-free. Something they were before running into the boys. Brian sighed, Howie definitely wasn’t making this easy on any of them, for his caring nature had the rest of them stressed with worry about themselves more than ever.
“You know,” AJ stated after several minutes of silence, debating whether or not he should speak any further. “I’m caught in the middle of not giving a shit and actually caring slightly.” He shook his head in disgust with himself as if he couldn’t believe he’d said those words aloud and really couldn’t believe he was actually feeling this way.
“Not you too, J...” Kevin groaned. “We don’t need another one of us straying away due to sympathy and being whipped into women.”
Nick snickered at Kevin’s last comment indicating that the second eldest man’s heart had turned to mush. He got a funny image of Howie wearing a wig, lipstick, and a padded bra while dressing in drag. This caused him to laugh even harder out loud. He got several dirty looks in his direction - Kevin’s being the worst - for his inappropriate timing to find humor in what was definitely a serious situation.
“Just what the hell do you find so funny?” he asked the blonde roughly as he grabbed the remote control and violently turned the TV off so none of them could watch any further. “It’s your fault that we’re in this situation.”
Nick’s smile slowly faded into a hurt frown as he looked away from the man who was nearly a decade older. It went without saying that the accident was slowly tearing the band apart, and only coming to some sort of understanding between each other would stop the downward spiral of destruction from happening.
“So, why exactly did you want me to meet you?” Howie asked Rhiannon as he looked nervously around her hospital room. “So you can accuse me and yell at me some more about being a shallow low life?”
“Surprisingly, no,” Rhiannon said softly, a small, sweet smile forming on her lips, “Although I probably should be,” she joked, but when Howie didn’t smile, hers faded, “I wanted to talk to you...tell you...discuss something with you, I guess.”
“Umm, okay.” Howie stated, still afraid of what would come of this conversation. Every time he’d talked to her in the past, she’d kicked him out without a single friendly word.
“Honest,” Rhiannon promised, “Nothing but good this time.”
Howie raised an eyebrow as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He slowly walked towards Rhiannon as if he were unsure of her true motives. He half expected her to reach out and hit him over the back of the head with a bed pan, knocking him out cold as soon as he was right up to her beside. He was shocked to see that she did no such thing, however she kept her calm, cool composure.
“So, um, what did you want to talk about?” Howie asked her wearily.
“Umm....well,” Rhiannon began, “This isn’t easy for me to say...beings I’ve treated you like shit...but, um, I am sorry for that.”
“E...Excuse me?” Howie blanked, looking at her as if she’d grown a second head.
Rhiannon laughed, “I’m sorry. You’ve been nothing but kind...and honestly, you’re the only one. The others have been either rude or their niceness forced. I ummm, I can tell yours is sincere though...now...although before, I thought it was all fake from you too.”
Howie looked dumbfounded. He was completely speechless, as Rhiannon’s words had not been expected at all. He just stared at her for a long moment, trying to decide if it had been real or if he’d blanked out her yelling at him some more.
“You can talk, you know,” Rhiannon laughed, “I’m not going to bite,” Howie still said nothing, “The gifts you got for Savvy were gorgeous. It was really sweet of you.” she smiled warmly at him.
“So she liked them?” Howie asked hopefully.
Adverting her gaze away from him, Rhiannon nibbled on her bottom lip before looking up at Howie with her eyes, “Not quite...ummm...” she paused, “She refused to look at them. Savvy still thinks you’re full of shit...and pretty much hates all five of you’s guts,” Rhiannon grinned devilishly, “I just hate four of you’s guts.”
Howie laughed at her attempt to joke. “Think she’ll ever give me a chance? Since you’re her best friend and all...maybe you’d know?”
Rhiannon shrugged, “I don’t know. Savannah can be pretty stubborn...if she does, it will take awhile and you’ll really have to prove to her you are not some sleazy creep who’s just after good publicity. I’d honestly be willing to bet though that in a couple weeks time, you’ll be irresistible to her. You were, after all, her favorite...before all of this.”
“You think?” Howie asked, his brown eyes lighting up and sparkling. It was obvious that he had some sort of attraction towards Savannah despite her coldness.
“Sure.” Rhiannon smiled at him, “You’ll just have to do whatever it takes to prove that you’re not an ass clown like the rest of the pod.”
“I think you’ll both see that in a few days after seeing the magazine headlines,” Howie muttered under his breath, knowing that the other Boys would do just as he asked and submit their Godly photographs minus his own.
They were right. He was destroying himself, but he didn’t care.
“What was that?” Rhiannon asked, puzzled.
“Oh, um, nothing.” Howie replied, “Well, thanks for giving me a chance.”
“No, thank you for being so honestly kind...and not giving up. You’re one of a kind...especially for being a celebrity,” Rhiannon frowned, “If only Kevin was as nice as you...cuz then I could still like him.”
“Kevin’s an asshole.” Howie spat, “They all are. It just took me twelve years to see it, unfortunately.”
Rhiannon was about to reply when an image appeared in her doorway. She looked to see that it was Savannah, slowly creeping just inside the doorway in a wheelchair, her leg propped up in what looked to be an uncomfortable contraption. She eyed Rhiannon cautiously before looking Howie up and down as if he were a walking disease.
“Want me to kick him out?” Savannah asked.
“Actually....I asked him here,” Rhiannon stated, “I wanted to talk to him about something.” she smiled in Howie’s direction, hoping that
Savannah might be decent towards him for the time being. Savannah was less than pleased though with the gesture.
“Oh, so now you’re going behind my back and talking to him let alone being nice?” Savannah cried out in frustration as well as intense anger, “I thought you were my best friend and would be there for me. But I guess it turns out you’re a back-stabber and just go along with everybody to get them to like you, no matter what. You’re making a huge mistake, because Howard the Great,” she spat the last word out in sarcasm, “Will screw you over again and you’ll have nobody.”
Savannah spun around in the wheelchair she was in with a quick motion and rolled herself out of Rhiannon’s room without another word before either had the rightful opportunity to stop her. Howie and Rhiannon stared at the now empty doorway speechless. Not one thing came to mind, for her reaction wasn’t expected, and had stung Rhiannon. She’d never hurt her best friend, but apparently she had without that intention. She turned to Howie and bit her lip nervously, her eyes holding worry.
“You might want to rethink that bet.” Howie stated, his voice holding the same note that the girl’s facial expression did. Rhiannon nodded. She’d possibly lost the best person to come in to her life. She hoped that Savannah would give her the chance to explain and forgive her. Until that happened though, she had a feeling that both her and Howie would have something new on their minds that would add stress to their lives.
Howie sighed as he continued to read the bashing headlines against his reputation in the news stand, each accompanied with a photo of him alone, most of which were from previous photo shoots. After all, he was ‘nowhere to be seen’ lately. He’d known that they would come, and he still didn’t care, other than he was giving the others the satisfaction that they wanted. For him to fail miserably and fall on his face. They were waiting for him to come crawling back, begging for forgiveness and for them to help him get back his good name. That wouldn’t happen though. He’d already told them that he’d rather have the respect of the girls that had been injured on their behalf than the public’s approval, and he was sticking to that.
Howie stood in deep thought for a moment. What had once been his four best friends were now four complete strangers whom he’d rather not know. They were without sympathy, only caring for themselves. Howie wondered how they’d gained the reputation of all being ‘Golden Hearted’. He found it ironic, and as a result, he was left to walk alone.
He must have been dozed off staring at the magazines, for he was distracted by something out of the corner of his eye. He turned his head and saw a group of three teenage girls staring at him with scowls on their faces.
“PIG,” one of them chided, as another spit on him. The third girl glared at him with fire in her eyes as if he didn't deserve to live.
Howie just turned and walked away, figuring it was no use to argue against them as he wiped the wad of saliva off of him. He could feel their eyes burning in to the back of him. It was his word against the media’s and he knew that this was just the beginning of the kinds of reactions he’d get from all kinds. Nobody would believe that he was the good one and the others were frauds. He knew in his heart what the truth was and that would have to be good enough. He hoped with time that things would be set straight, but if not, at least he would know he’d made a difference to two women, and at the moment, that was all he cared about.
