~Mare’s last chapter heeheehee~
The boys were suddenly blinded by a magnificently bright light as they walked through the door marked Mare.
“Great…just terrific, so we enter the anal retentive one’s door and end up dead?”
“Um…Kevin why on earth would you think we are dead?” AJ asked placing his sunglasses on.
“And how on earth can you of all people call someone else anal retentive?” Nick was quick to add.
“Well think about all the symbolism for a moment guys. We walked through a tunnel only now to get to the end of a tunnel where a bright light is waiting for us.”
“But…but…I am too young to die!” Nick stammered as they continued on into the very bright light.
Mare: I can assure you that you guys are not dead. I have a rule that in all of my fanfics I never kill off anyone.
“Um…didn’t people die in this story? I distinctly remember Alexandra having her head chopped off.” AJ said giving the author a questionable look.
Mare: Right…what I meant was I don’t kill off anyone that is important to the story. All of the non you types are fair game I’m afraid.
“So we aren’t dead then?”
Mare: Nope Nick...not dead.
“Non you types? Wow that is horrible grammar.”
Mare: Thanks Kevin, I’ll remember that when I decide to write my next story. I think I’ll call it The Unfortunate tale of Kevin and the Cactus.
“Okay I get the hint.”
“Okay so if we aren’t dead, what’s with the light?” Just as Howie asked that, clapping was heard in the distance. All the boys looked at each confused by what they were hearing. The sound of The Elephant Walk playing in the background did nothing to help them in their confusion.
Writer: Keep walking guys, you’ll figure it out soon enough.
“Okie dokie…” Nick said taking the lead and walking towards the clapping.
“Guys this is strange.” Everyone looked at Howie like he was an idiot.
“Well it IS!” He said in defense of his stupidity.
“Guys I see blinking lights up ahead.”
“Can you make out what they say Nick?” Kevin asked as he jogged to catch up with the youngest member of the group.
“This reminds me of Christmas, with all the blinking lights, very shiny and Christmassy.”
“You’re a weirdo AJ.”
“Shut the hell up Brian.”
“Well you are!”
“Oh crap on a stick!” The two boys stopped arguing when they saw the sign that had Kevin let out that great proclamation.
“What the hell do you think that means?” Howie asked Kevin, but it was too late. Before anyone knew what was happening, someone grabbed Nick by the arm and started running him towards the stage.
“Here we go.” Brian said under his breath as they all were quickly escorted to the stage where in front of each one of them was a podium with their name on it in small blinking lights.
Mare, the witty and vibrant writer walked out wearing her Sunday best and stood at a podium of her own amidst a room full of cheering. The boys continued to look at each other a bit confused by what was going on.
Mare: Yes Howie…a bit, now excuse me while I start this show.
The music went on full blast as the audience cheered uncontrollably. Once again the boys looked at each other and shook their heads.
Mare: Welcome everyone to The Backstreets Boys play… *crowd says in unison* Hope you were paying attention.
“Ugh, I suck at these things.” Howie grumbled under his breath.
“Don’t worry D; I’m sure it’ll be nothing.” Brian reassured as the theme music finally stopped.
Mare: Welcome boys to the final chapter of your story. It has been quite an adventure plagued with mystery, suspense, laughter and tears. You are going to be answering questions to make it out of this story by trying to recall what has happened to you while you were here. So I hope you have been paying attention.
Everyone instantly looked over at Nick who seemed to be intrigued by his buzzer, hitting it on and off, trying to see how fast he could get it to go. When he realized all eyes were on him, he looked up and shrugged, “I’m sorry…did you say something?” He asked.
“Great…we are SO dead!” AJ said while letting out a sigh of disgust.
“I’m ready to play, I pay attention to everything so let’s get it on now baby! I have a wife to go home too!” Kevin placed his hand about an inch over the buzzer, anticipating the question.
Mare: Not so fast Mr. Richardson, of course this would be easy if it was just the five of you playing. Now where would the fun be in that? So I searched long and hard for five people to play this game against you. You have to beat them if you want out of this fanfic.
The music started to play again as the five people who the boys were competing against made their way out on stage and stood behind their podiums.
Mare: Let me introduce you to your competition…first we have Carrie. She is a super huge fan not only of you guys but of this story. She does not want it to end and will do anything to stop it.
Carrie: You are right about that Mare! I love you guys SOOOOOOOOOOOOO much. Can I have a hug?
Mare: Not now Carrie, they are your competition, be fierce…be strong!
She said to the camera but then she made a little heart with her fingers and mouthed the words I love you to Nick who smirked at her.
Mare: Oookay then…next we have Sabina. She is well… interesting.
Sabina: Whatever *shrugs*
All the boys looked at each other and shook their heads.
Mare: Next up is Britney; she frankly doesn’t want you guys to make it to the end because that would make you happy.
Britney: Just so you know you all suck ass!
“Um…thanks?” AJ whispered.
Mare: There was going to be another player Melissa, but she kind of had a melt down so in her place is one of my own partners in crime…Mersey!
Mersey: I am SO going to win this you have no idea! I mean I wrote this thing!
Mare: Yes…oh and last but not least, Maria…Marina…whatever you would like to call her.
Maria: Call me a winner!
Mare: Okay here are the rules…I will call you two at a time to come up to answer a question. First one to buzz in and answer correctly wins. You are playing to 10 points so good luck to all of you!
Sabina: Yeah whatever…*shrugs*
Mare: Okay so let’s have Kevin up first and…
Before Mare could even finish her sentence Maria barreled past her team mates and ended up next to Kevin where she very uncompetitive like, laid her head on his shoulder.
“Uh…a little breathing room would be great.” He said slinking away from Maria who stuck her tongue out at him in return.
Maria: Just so you know Kevin, I am very good at these things and you do not stand a chance against me.
“Well, considering you wrote this story and all I would hope you get things right. Good Lord please explain to me how that is fair?”
Mare: Kevin stop complaining. Do I need to call the Waahhmbulance?
“That was funny! You are a funny girl Mare.”
Mare: Thanks Nick.
“Please spare me…” Kevin said rolling his eyes as the cactus loomed in the background.
Mare: Okay here is your first question…in the Teenybopper chapter…
“Hang on Time OUT”
Mare: Here we go…what’s the problem Kevin?
“Didn’t’ she write that chapter? I mean can’t you at least ask her about a chapter she didn’t write?”
Mare: I’m sorry Kevin, the questions are already prepared. Too late to change them around.
“This isn’t fair.”
Maria: Okay ask away Mare! Let’s go….!
Mare: What was the name of the girl who hit it off with Brian?
Maria: That would be Brianna!
Mare: You are correct! One point to the fans!
“So not fair!”
Maria: I’m sorry Kevin but I know a lot.
“You WROTE it!
Maria: That’s just a small technicality.
Kevin walked away from the buzzer in disgust as Maria hopped by high fiving her team, except for Sabina and Britney who would have none of that.
“So unfair…” Kevin grumbled one last time as Howie slowly made his way up to the main podium.
Mare: Okay who wants to compete against Howie?
She looked up and down the row of females and the rest of the guys snickered while Howie turned and gave them a look. “They just know they don’t stand a chance against me, that’s all.”
“Yeah D, that must be it brother.” AJ said trying not to laugh.
Sabina: You know what? I’ll go I mean…you don’t really look that good today or anything, no offense but at least you look better than the other guys. Nick does not look good at all in my opinion.
“What does that have to do with the game?” Howie asked innocently as the crazy girl made her way to the podium.
Sabina: It’s my opinion and I’m entitled to it.
“Okay then…” Howie shook his head at Mare who shrugged at him.
Mare: Okay here is the second question….IN the Suspense chapter, where did the Axe man fall from?
Sabina: Hrmm….well I don’t really read fan fiction because frankly I mean it’s kind of weird that you all would be writing about things happening to real people. So I think it’s weird and not right. I mean it’s my opinion and I’m entitled to it. *shrugs*
Mare: So is that your answer then?
“Oh I know…I know!”
Mare: Okay, Howie what’s the answer?
Howie: Is it a tree?
Mare: Yes you are correct! It’s a tree…one point for team BSB!
“Oh yeah…It’s my birthday…we gonna party like it’s my birthday…”
Sabina: Whatever *shrugs* I mean it’s not like it was a fair question. I mean Fan fiction is just wrong and weird in my opinion.
Mare: You said that already.
Sabina: Just stating my opinion…which I’m entitled to by the way.
Everyone shook their heads as Brian came bounding towards the podium, now confident that if Howie could answer a question right they all could.
“Okay which one of you is going down?” Brian asked still bouncing like a little puppy dog at the first sight of snow.
“Aww what a cute little description.”
Mare: Thanks…so who is coming up here? Mers?
Mersey: I wanted to compete against Nick.
Mare: Mersey why don’t you let Carrie compete against Nick since you have gotten to pretty much do anything you wanted to the boy for the last 20 chapters or so.
She walked towards the podium and gave Carrie a glare and rolled her eyes at the incredible writer known as Mare.
Mare: Okay here is the next question…in the slash chapter which two characters got it on?
Mare: Kevin I believe you have nothing to do with this question.
“I wanted to say that nobody got anything on in the slash chapter. Nothing happened. NOTHING!
Brian was grinning wide at his cousin’s expense and then he buzzed.
Mare: Yes Brian?
“Kevin and Nick got it on!”
“We did not!!”
Mare: You are correct! That’s two points for team BSB!
“We did not get it on!”
Mare: Kevin enough, you know you wanted too!
Mersey: I knew the answer but I was too busy watching Nick blush…he’s so cute when he blushes with his little red, flushed cheeks.
Mare: Go back to your team.
AJ was the next one to walk up to the main podium. Not watching where he was going, he accidentally tripped on a glow stick that was thrown on stage and fell to the floor.
“Excuse me but that actually happened at one of our shows.”
Mare: I know this AJ, sometimes writers like to add things that have happened in real life to make the entire story more real and bring it to a whole other level.
“Oh, well couldn’t you pick something else, because that hurt like a bitch!”
Mare: Sorry I would have but Britney threw the stick at you.
Britney: Got that damn right…I got this bitch! Let’s go and by the way please stop wearing those damn skull caps. You look a fool in those things.
Mare: Okay…so here is question number four…In the Sci Fi chapter...
Maria: I wrote that one!
Mare: Yes we know…anyway…in that chapter, what was the name of the creatures that attacked the boys?
“I believe they were the Howl Crawlers?”
Mare: You are correct! Three points for team BSB!
Maria: Well actually it was the Howlcrawlers…one word but when you edited it you made it two words.
Mare: Because they are two words.
Maria: But it’s Sci Fi so it should have been one.
Mare: And I would have known this because?
Maria: Because that’s how I wrote it!
Mare: But you asked for me to edit it!
“Uh…so am I right or not?” AJ asked confused.
Britney: I should get the point since AJ is wrong and his album flopped just like I said it would because I am right ALL the time!
“Our album didn’t flop.”
Britney: Yes it did.
“No, it didn’t.”
Britney: Yes it did.
Sabina: I agree with Britney and I’m entitled to, because it’s my opinion.
Mare: The point goes to AJ because frankly you annoy the crap out of me Britney!
“Yes! Thanks Mare!” She nodded at the Backstreet Boy as he tagged Nick on the back to take his place.
Carrie bounced over to the stage and jumped up and down holding her hand to her mouth in disbelief that Nick was standing right in front of her.
Nick smiled at her as she bounced, “Hey there.”
Carrie: I love you….you are the best.
“Would you like a hug?” Carrie nodded and started to cry as Nick walked over and embraced her in a huge hug while the entire audience awed.
Britney: Damn teeny bopper. Nick is a fool and a jerk; I can’t believe you guys can’t see that!
Sabina: I can’t believe he is hugging her and not me. I’ll never get to meet Nick.
“But you just said you don’t think he looks good in YOUR opinion.” Kevin said raising his eyebrow at the incredibly all over the place girl.
Sabina: He doesn’t *shrug*
Mare: Okay you two, you need to break it up so we can get on with the game.
The incredibly talented and awesome writer gently pried Carrie’s arms off of Nick and walked her back to the podium as she continued to bounce.
Mare: Okay here is question five…the boys only need two more to win.
“Wait…I thought we were playing for ten points. If we got two more that would mean only five points.” Brian made sure to point out to the person who wrote that in the first place and would know what she wrote.
“Okay no need to get defensive, I’m just saying.”
Mare: Brian I changed my mind. Honestly this is already going on its eleventh page and my other stories aren’t going to write themselves.
“Brian hush! The quicker we win, the quicker we get out of here!” Howie whispered.
“Okay good point, sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you.”
Mare: Okay question number five…in the action chapter what attacked Kevin?
Carrie: A duck!!!
Mare: You are correct very good… the fans have two points!
Kevin walked back over to the podium as did Maria who winked at the tall, handsome brunette as she grabbed his hand in a shake.
Mare: Okay question 6…in the horror chapter what terrorized AJ?
Maria: That would be a chinchilla Mare.
Mare: Actually you are wrong.
Mare: You’re wrong.
Maria: No I am not, I distinctly remember in that chapter that AJ had a chinchilla fall on his head a few times and I remember almost peeing myself.
“Oh I’m so glad my misfortune made you so happy Maria!”
Maria: Sorry AJ but its true. That was pretty funny.
Mare: That wasn’t the horror chapter that was the musical chapter.
Maria: Oh of course it was! Ugh I can’t believe I said that!
Mare: You are correct! That is Backstreet 4 and fans 2!
Maria: I can’t believe I got that wrong.
Mare: That’s okay we still love you.
Howie walked up to the podium, “Okay I’m ready to win this thing for us so let’s get going miss sunshine.”
All the boys laughed at that as well as the three nice, normal fans and the outstanding writer Mare.
Sabina trudged up to the podium rolling her eyes the whole way.
“I’m confused about these two people who are our fans. What is the deal? I mean couldn’t you find better people than these two?” AJ asked pointing over to Sabina and Britney who was kicking a small child to make her feel better.
Mare: That is another writer thing, sometimes we put people in our stories that tend to annoy the crap out of us, where we can use them in an open forum anyway we want. This case to mock them, although I’m sure in real life they are not bad people.
“Wow so these are real people?”
Mare: Yes although their names have been changed…slightly.
“SO Britney wouldn’t really be kicking a small child in real life?”
“Well, that’s a relief.”
Sabina: Can we get this over with? I mean no offense but I really feel creeped out being in a fan fic. I think they are kind of dumb and pointless in my opinion.
“And Sabina wouldn’t really keep repeating herself endlessly?”
Mare: Um….sadly she would.
Sabina: I don’t care what you guys think of me, I’m entitled to my opinion.
Mare: We know this! Anyway onto the last question…in the musical chapter…
“I hated that chapter.”
Mare: I don’t really care Howie; this is the question…who didn’t get their own song?
Mare smiled wide at Howie as he pounced on the buzzer. “Me!!!” He said proudly hopping up and down like a happy little fairy.
“Happy little fairy?”
Mare: How about a cute little kitten?
Mare: I aim to please and congratulations you have won the game! BSB 5 and fans 2.
The crowd roared with applause as the Elephant Walk played in the background and the boys all hugged each other and high fived. They all seemed so relieved and happy as the three writers walked over and joined them.
Mare: Well boys congrats! You have earned the right to leave this story once and for all. Thanks for being a part of this with us.
Maria: Yes, it’s been fun.
Mersey: We’ll miss you!
They all nodded and hugged as they made their way to the final door waving at everyone as they did. “All right let’s get out of here once and for all!” Kevin said grabbing onto the door marked Exit only to let out a frustrated sigh when it wouldn’t open.
“What in the holy hell…son of a Bit…”
Mare: oops yes I forgot, this is my chapter so of course we have to end with a song. Once the song is over the door will open!
“Did someone say song?” Howie asked standing in front of the door as a spotlight zoomed in on him.
This is Howie’s Song
Sung by Howie and company
Brian: This is Howie’s song….he’s been waiting to sing it all story long…
AJ: He is patient as a saint, but he also likes to color and paint!
Kevin: He has waited so looooong!
Nick: So here he comes to sing…his song
Brian: He is so strong of heart and he doesn’t really fart.
Kevin: And he is great with kids and money and one day he’ll have a honey
AJ: Wait and see
Nick: Oh Howie…oh Howie D!
Mare, Maria and Mersey: Howie you are so sweet and kind, Howie you are a friend of mine…Howie we love you yes we do…Howie you are the great Emu
Howie: You know you don’t always have to rhyme and I’d really love to sing now.
Sabina: Oh I love Howie now…he used to be my least favorite guy. But now Nick doesn’t look good in my opinion he’s skinny, thin and sly...
Carrie: Oh please just shut the heck up…and go so far away. Nick looks just fine and I’m sure he doesn’t care what you say!
Howie: Um...this song is about me and I still haven’t sung.
Britney: That’s because you suck…monkey dung!
Everyone: Monkey dung….
Howie: You just had everyone harmonize monkey dung?
Brian: So Howie…you know we love you!
Kevin: Even more than you love your own shampoo
AJ: Because you are the way you are and do the things you do….
Nick: Howie we really really really really really really really really…
Howie: really what?
Nick: I have no idea the lyrics just kind of stopped.
Mare: Oh…hrmm let me see that please *examines lyrics and then finishes phrase and hands it back to Nick.*
Nick: Really really really….loooooooove….you!
When the song hit its final chord the big door burst open and all of the boys waved as they walked out.
“Hang on a second! I’m not going anywhere until you let me sing! That was bull! I mean you give me a song and then you don’t let me even sing it?”
Mare: You got to sing I a few times.
“So not fair!”
“Um…Howie you are in the Backstreet Boys dude…you get to sing all the time” Nick said patting his friend on the back.
“Oh yeah, you have a point there Nicky!”
Mare: Bye guys!
All the boys waved one more time before walking out the door.
“I still can’t believe we didn’t get attacked by a single shark or anything and not even one plane crash or anything?”
“Nick shut the hell up!” AJ said as the door closed on the story forever.
Just a note…I’m sorry if I offended anyone in the last chapter but it was my opinion and I was entitled to it. Tee hee hee
And on a more serious note, just wanted to thank everyone for reading this and for Mersey and Maria for writing this. LMAO when you think about how it all started about a psycho fan, thriller and how it ended up, that alone makes a pretty good story. I am not big on collaborations because of my anal retentiveness but I’m glad I got to do this one with you.
Love you both!
And again thanks everyone for reading and enjoying this story!