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They reached the car a second later and Nick climbed slowy into the back, followed by Howie who handed his keys over to AJ. Nick immediately laid down, resting his head on Howie's knees as he took in a few deep breaths, remaining silent. AJ was glancing frequently into the rearview mirror, his troubled brown eyes meeting Howie's every few moments, both of them waiting for Nick to talk. It wasn't until they were more than halfway back to the house that Nick finally spoke up, his voice soft.

"So they want me to stay in the hospital."
"What? Why? For how long?" The rebel asked as he tore his eyes from the road to glance at the backseat. "A few months at the very least, according to the doctor. And because they want to increase the chemo treatments." AJ let out a loud groan, banging on the steering wheel lightly as Howie shut his own eyes, leaning back into the seat. "It's not working then?" The eldest said quietly, slowly opening his eyes. "It is but slowly." Nick sighed. "Dr. Peterson thinks that it would be best if I doubled the amount of chemo I was getting."
"Then that's what you need to do kid." AJ muttered, turning onto the dirt road that led to Nick's house. "Whatever it takes to beat this, yeah?"
"I'm tired AJ."
"You can sleep when we get inside. We're gonna be there in a few seconds."
"Not that kind of tired Jay." Howie snapped, rubbing his forhead and trying to ignore the knot building in his stomach. This was too familiar. His sister had said the same thing during her fight with Lupus. "Nicky, you can't give up now." Howie gently brushed a few hairs from the younger man's eyes, meeting his gaze with a small smile.

"I know." Nick shrugged, sitting up slowly as the car rolled to a halt. "It just sucks ass."
AJ chuckled at the choice of words, turning around to look at his younger friend.
"I bet it does."
"The doctor gave me a choice. You know? If I want to double the chemo or not and if I want to move to the hospital. He wants me to move to the hospital cuz he says I'm gonna get sicker from the chemo."
"And what are you going to tell him?" Howie asked slowly.
"I guess that I'm doing the chemo. As for the hospital...I really don't want to, but I think I should. I mean, I can't keep having you guys put your live on pause for me."
"Nick-"
"Seriously Jay! I mean, Brian has a family, Kevin is married...you guys have your own shit to do. I can't expect you all to just stay at my house until this ends. I mean, I know you guys aren't that far away but still, it might just be easier on everyone." Both Howie and AJ let out small sighs, looking at one another for a moment. A small smile crept onto Nick's face as he watched them. "You know I'm right."
"Yeah." AJ sighed, "I guess you are. But you still gotta break the news to Kev and Rok."
"I'm sure they'll be fine."
"I dunno Nicky," Howie laughed, watching as the two cousins emerged from the house, walking towards the car. Kevin had an apron on and Brian was carrying a dust cloth, both of them wearing confused looks on their faces. "I think they've gotten used to being here. Cooking and cleaning and everything."
"You really should let them keep it up." AJ grinned. "I like the full out service. But if you must, try and be gentle."
"Yeah well, all good things must come to an end I guess." Nick smiled, rolling his eyes, his gaze on the two men outside the car. He missed the look of sadness AJ shot Howie at the words, the older man shaking his head shortly. Now was not the time.



After Kevin had helped Nick to the couch, he lay down, closing his eyes for a second. The four men glanced at each other, worry displayed on their faces. As Kevin went into the kitchen to check on dinner, Howie followed him, not sure if he should tell him the news so Nick didn’t have to later on. “What’s it, D.? It’s not good news, is it?” Kevin washed his hands while looking at him. Howie decided he wasn’t the one to tell him. “He wants to tell you himself, Kev.” He shrugged, turned around and walked back into the living area, so he couldn’t blab anything out.
As he walked past Brian, he noticed how exhausted Nick’s best friend looked. He was sitting on the floor, his arms hugging his knees, staring at Nick who now was sound asleep by the looks of it. These last few months had been so hard on all of them. The insecurities, fears, but also the decline in Nick’s health, even though that was caused by the chemo, not the cancer. He worried a lot, fearing that Nick would give up fighting, deciding it had been enough. Even the thought of losing him, brought tears to his eyes. He was way too young to die, way too young to leave this earth.

About half an hour later, Nick slowly opened his eyes, only to see four pairs of eyes staring at him.
“Good morning gentlemen..” he smiled. “Were you enjoying the view?”
The four men smiled in return. “Actually no. We all kissed you, hoping you’d become a beautiful princess, but since that didn’t work, we were trying to figure out what to do next.”
“Thanks Rok for putting that image in my head.”
“No need to thank me, Frack, just filling up the empty space..” Brian chuckled as he catched the pillow Nick threw in his direction. None of them said a word after that smalltalk had enlightend the mood just a bit. Nick was scared of Kevin’s and Brian’s reaction to the news of him being admitted into the hospital and the feelings he had about putting their lives on hold. The two cousins were waiting for the young one to open up to them, and as for the other two, they really didn’t want to be there to witness the conversation that was about to take place.

The five men chatted idly for another hour or so, before Nick finally let out a long sigh, clearing his throat soflty as he shot Howie a look. The older man immediately caught on, rising to his feet as he gave AJ a small kick on his leg.
"Alright, there are dishes waiting to be done. AJ, wanna help me out?"
"Not especially." The rebel shrugged, his chocolate gaze on his cell phone.
"Jay, just help him do the dishes." Kevin sighed, running a hand over his face as he gave Howie a look of understanding. "I don't DO dishes." Howie rolled his eyes at the remark, marching over to where AJ was sitting and snatching his cell phone out of his grip. "HEY!"
"Help me wash the dishes or I swear, I'll dump your phone in the toilet."
"You're bluffing."
"Bluffing my ass." The Latino muttered, stomping out of the room. AJ was silent for a moment, a smirk on his face as he watched Howie leave the room. "He's bluffing." He shrugged, glancing at Kevin, Brian and Nick. "Right?"
"I dunno Jay." Nick chuckled a small smile across his face, laugh burst from him as they all heard the toilet flush and AJ jumped to his feet, his eyes wide. "He didn't..." Was all he said before running from the room.