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Nick sat shivering on the exam table, his body leaning exhaustedly into Brian's, who sat beside him, an arm drooped around his shoulder, hugging him tightly, a thin blanket haphazardly covering the younger man's form.

"Well Nick, you made it through all the tests." Dr. Schagen concluded as she glanced through her records before shutting them and sending the pair a large smile. Brian slowly returned it, nudging Nick, who in turn, attempted a smile, failing miserably and settling for simply nodding.
"When will we have all the results?" Brian question softly, running his free hand through his hair. He was emotionally and physically exhausted from the testing process, and he hadn't even been the one being tested. The Kentuckian could only imagine how drained Nick was, though by a simple glance at the younger man, it was obvious how worn out he had become.

"A day or two," Dr. Schagen began to reply, trailing off when she noted the crestfallen looks on both men's faces. Biting her lip, she let out a quiet sigh, understanding their urgency. “Actually, I can put a rush on these. So, in about 4 or 5 hours?”
“That’s great. Thank you.”
“Thanks.” Nick added very softly, unsure of whether or not he really was in a hurry to discover the results. Did he really want to know that much sooner he was going to die? Then again, how much relief would it bring him to know there was going to a light at the end of this tunnel? He let out a breath, leaning more into Brian, almost as if the older man was his shield from reality.

“Well, I’ll leave you to get dressed and I’ll give you a call as soon as the results are ready.” With a small nod, Dr. Schagen made her way out of the room, shutting the door behind her and leaving the two men alone in silence.

“I guess you better get dressed Frack.” Brian finally sighed, rubbing the youth’s arm gently. “So we can get back to the fellas.”
“Yeah.” Came the muffled reply as Nick shut his eyes, rubbing a hand over his face. Brian could see all the marks decorating the blonde’s arms, each one a memory of a shot being administered, an IV being inserted, bone marrow being taken…the list went on and on. Brian had tried for the life of him to keep track of everything the had tested, knowing full well the detailed report Kevin would demand the moment he got him alone but at one point, he had simply given up, too distracted with trying to keep Nick calm. The older man had known from the start that going with Nick would be difficult, but he had never expected how deeply it would affect him. Nor how upset the youth had gotten.



“God, what is all this stuff?” Nick was whispering as he was wheeled into a large examination room, his blue eyes wide as they darted around. “Frick?”
“I don’t know buddy.” Brian was in awe himself, a nervous feeling in the pit of his stomach as he watched the half a dozen or so nurses setting up various machines. A few machines Brian recognized, either from seeing them in movies or from actually experiencing them first hand when he had had his heart problem. But some of the larger machines; Brian shook his head. They looked so intimidating.

“Alright Nick, the first test I want to run on you, will be done by this machine here.” Dr. Schagen began to explain as Nick’s wheelchair was halted by one of the largest machines in the room. Brian fought to roll his eyes; of course. “This is what’s known as a Positron emission tomography test, or a PET test. Now, it’s completely painless-“
“Oh thank GOD.” Nick blurted out, causing both Brian and the doctor to chuckle. A light crimson spread to the younger man’s cheeks and he ducked his head, a small smile gracing his features. “Sorry. Go on.”

“Okay. So, what it roughly amounts to, is a big x-ray. What you’re going to do is lay on this stretcher here,” She patted the table before continuing, “And it’s going to slide into that tunnel looking part. Now, you’re going to stay in there for about half an hour to 45 minutes so we can get a complete and comprehensive scan of your internal organs. Also,” Dr. Schagen turned for a moment and picked up a paper cup that was less than half full, with a white and silver looking mixture inside, handing it to Nick.

“I’m guessing this isn’t a vanilla milkshake?” The youth sighed, swirling the cup around and frowning as the liquid barely moved. “What is this shit?”
“Nick!” Brian admonished, smacking his younger friend’s arms lightly. “I’m sorry,” He directed towards Dr. Schagen, shaking his head.
“It’s quite alright. I’d actually have to agree with Nick; that mixture is shit.” A small laugh left her at Brian’s puzzled look and Nick’s triumphant one and she nodded, “Allow me to clarify. This is a radiotracer, a radioactive substance we use to help us view the diseased areas in your organs. It’s most commonly given through an IV, however, I figured with all the other tests we’d be doing, I’d spare you a needle prick.”
“Thanks.”
“I’ll warn you though, that has a most unpleasant taste.”

Nick brought the cup up to his nose, sniffing it before making a face. “That’s disgusting!” He shot a look at Brian. “It smells like Kevin’s socks after a concert.” A comically horrified, expression passed over the older man’s face and he mimicked fainting earning a genuine laugh from his youngest friend. “Talk about a double edged sword.” The Southerner laughed, patting the youth’s shoulder. “Sucks Nicky. What exactly does this do? I mean, why do you need it?”

“The chemicals in the tracer will disperse themselves throughout Nick’s system evenly. But in the areas where the cancer is, they’ll be thicker and more concentrated. It basically allows us to see clearly where and how much the cancer has spread.” Dr. Schagen answered. “Now, I need you to drink that and sit still for about 20 minutes in order to allow the chemicals to run through your system. No moving, no talking, no nothing once you drink that, okay?”

“Alright.”
“Once you’re in the machine, it’s going to be very important that you try not to move at all. Movement makes it harder for us to get a clear picture of what we need, understand?” Nick nodded slowly. “Sometimes patients experience a sense of claustrophobia during the test since it is a small space and you are in the dark. Are you claustrophobic?”
“Not that I know of.” Nick replied nervously, his palms beginning to sweat as he glanced at the machine.
“Good. Now, while you’re in there, you’ll be able to here my voice through a speaker system and Brian’s if you need to. We’ll be in another room where-”
“Brian can’t stay with me?” A panicked tone colored Nick’s voice and his gaze snapped to Brian, who sent him a gentle smile.
“It’s all good Frack. I can talk to you through that speaker. It’ll be like I’m right there with you. Okay?” He rubbed the younger man’s shoulder reassuringly.
“I-I guess.”

“Dr. Schagen? The PET machine is ready.” A nurse called, receiving a nod from the doctor. “Okay Nick, I need you to go ahead and drink the tracer.” Nick gulped, looking down at the liquid as he let out a small moan. “I’ll be back in about 20 minutes.”

“I should have just gotten it through an IV.” Nick muttered as he watched the doctor walk away from them, heading out of the room. “This is some disgusting ass crap.”
“Too late for shoulda, coulda, woulda’s Nicky.” Brian shrugged, standing in front of Nick and crossing his arms. “Now drink up.”
The youth sent his older friend a glare before reluctantly bringing the cup up and tipping it, allowing the liquid to hit his tongue. “FUCK!” The statement slipped away from Nick as he shook his head violently, spitting and sputtering as he tried to get the taste out of his mouth. “That’s DISGUSTING.” The liquid had a metallic taste to it, coupled with what almost tasted like liver and onions. It was a mixture that made Nick want to gag. “Fuck this bullshit! I ain’t drinking that shit.”
“Nickolas!” Brian hissed, “Knock it off. You need to drink that, it can’t be that bad.”
“Don’t ‘Nickolas’ me. You drink this shit and then tell me it’s not that bad.” Nick shot back as he mocked his older friend. “I can’t drink it.”
“You need to.”
“I want the IV instead.”
“Stop being such a baby.”
“I’m not being-”
“Like hell you aren’t.” The Kentuckian snapped. “Look, Nick,” Brian let out a sigh, as he fought to control his temper, crouching down in front of the chair and placing his hands on Nick’s legs. “This could be our chance to get you better. Please…if this is what it takes, why would you not jump at the opportunity?”

A long sigh left Nick and he rolled his eyes, biting down on his lip as he looked at the cup again. “Fuck.” He mumbled, pinching his nose as he brought the mixture up again. “Fuckin dirty, sweaty, tastin’ like Kevin’s socks death drink.” Nick rambled before tossing the liquid into his mouth. He gagged at it hit his tongue, his fingernails digging into the paper cup as he fought to keep it down. It slid down the back of his throat much more slowly than he wanted it to, slimy and cold, causing him to cough and choke, Brian whispering encouraging words in an effort to help him. “J-Jesus…” he gasped out, only to be silenced by Brian. “H-holy fu-fucking…”
“No talking Frack.” He reminded, wincing at the pained look Nick shot him. “I’m sorry buddy. It’ll be better soon.” Sitting back in the chair, Nick clenched and unclenched his hands, slowly releasing breaths as tears pooled in his eyes. Brian kept his gaze on the floor, straightening up and moving back to stand behind the wheelchair his hands gently rubbing Nick’s shoulders. He blinked harshly; knowing nothing he could say would make the situation better.

Dr. Schagen returned what seemed like hours later, a sympathetic smile on her features.
“Okay Nick, let’s get you up here on the stretcher.” A few nurses helped Nick onto the table and he swallowed harshly, his blue eyes wide as he laid down. “Brian and I are going to leave for the moment, we’ll be back when the test is over.”
“It’s gonna be okay Nicky,” Brian assured, stepping over squeezing Nick’s hand. “The worst part of this one is over.” Nick squeezed his hand back, a powerful urge not to let go washing over him and he shook his head, suddenly feeling very alone and very scared. A tremor ran through him as straps were fastened over his body, disabling most of his movements and making him feel completely trapped. “Frick…I don’t want you to leave.”
“Shhh. Buddy you can’t talk. It’s gonna be okay, trust me.” The older man smiled dimly, untangling his hand from Nick’s. One look at the younger man’s face almost caused Brian to lose his composure, seeing flickers of the scared little 12 year old boy he had so quickly bonded with. “Trust me Frack.” Tears slipped from Nick’s eyes and Brian forced himself to turn away, following the doctor out of the room and into a smaller observation room. The room had a bunch of computer monitors and a large window where Brian could see Nick lying on the stretcher, his eyes darting around. The table slowly jerked forward and it was only a matter of seconds before Nick’s body disappeared, completely within the tunnel.

Dr. Schagen flicked a few switched before pulling a long microphone forward, tapping on it before speaking. “Nick, can you hear me okay?”
“Y-yeah. Brian?” Nick’s voice was shaky and small and Brian bit down hard on his lip, wishing Kevin had come with them. The older man was a whole lot better at dealing with these situations than he was. “I-I wanna talk to Bri…” Dr. Schagen nodded and motioned him forward and he cleared his throat. “I’m here Frack. Just relax.”

“Okay Nick. We’re going to start the x-rays. Stay as still as possible and don’t talk anymore.” Dr. Schagen hit a few more buttons and Brian could see a circular tube sliding back and forth over the machine. Silence overwhelmed the rooms for about 15 minutes before it was broken by the sound of sniffling, soon coupled with slow sobs.
“How much longer?” Brian demanded softly, his sapphire eyes narrowed in worry. “He’s freaking out. Aren’t you done yet?”
“Almost. But not quite yet.” The words had just left Dr. Schagen’s mouth when a low scream came traveling through the microphone, causing both Dr. Schagen and Brian to jump in alarm.

“Get me out!” Nick’s voice shot through the room, panicky and high, a tone Brian had never heard before. “GET ME OUT! GET ME OUT!” He was screaming now, and Brian could hear the dim sounds of him banging on something. Sobs accompanied his screams and Brian felt chills run down his spine. “BRIAN! BRIAN!!! GET ME OUT! OH GOD, GET ME OUT!!”
“You heard him!” The Southerner cried, grabbing the microphone. “It’s okay Frack…calm down, just calm down. Breathe. We’ll get you out….just calm down! You’ve got to calm down!”
“I DON’T WANT TO DIE! I CAN’T….I-I….GET ME OUT!! BRIAN PLEASE! PLEASE! GET ME OUT OF HERE!”

Dr. Schagen said nothing, her face blank as she hit a few buttons, the stretcher sliding back into view. Brian tore from the room and back into the examination room, where Nick was weaving around on the table, his face pale, his body shaking. Eyes wide, his panic grabbed Brian and left him breathless, the older man’s hand’s shaking as he tried to undo the straps holding the younger man down.
“GET ME OUT! Oh GOD….BRIAN! Brian, help me please!!”
Dr. Schagen came running into the room a moment later, two nurses behind her, one of them holding a shot. Nick spotted it in a second, practically launching himself off the stretcher, into his older friend as Brian undid the last strap, causing both of them to hit the floor with a loud ‘thud’. The youth scrambled to get up, being caught fast by Brian who held him around the waist, trying not to lose his grip. “NO! NO! Keep them AWAY!”

Nick was fighting the older man’s hold, his height putting him at an advantage as he struggled against Brian, who was half sitting, half laying on the floor, trying to keep Nick from going anywhere. “It’s okay Frack! It’s okay! Calm down! I’m here! Brian’s here!” The older man was shouting over Nick’s screams, shaking his head at Dr. Schagen who was telling one of the nurses to get more people in the room. “No! Let me handle him. You’ll just scare him!”

“He’s a danger to himself!” Dr. Schagen was arguing, “We need to sedate him…it’s the safest thing to do!”
“NO!” Nick hollered, tears running down his face at a furious rate. Brian could feel his resolve weakening, his body giving into fatigue and he used that to an advantage, tightening his hold on Nick.
“Frack! Frack, listen to me! Calm down, calm DOWN! Frack, it’s all okay! I’ve got you. I’m here!” Nick finally seemed to listen to his older friend, his fight to get away disappearing as he collapsed against Brian, sobbing loudly. “It’s okay Nicky, it’s okay.”
“I c-can’t….I’m sorry. I’m s-so sorry…I can’t…”