That unsettling feeling he had on the pit of his stomach was back again. The last time he had one of those, he had learnt that his best friend had Darla, only the incurable disease that ends with death. So what could be worst than finding out Nick had Darla? He refused to acknowledge it but he knew at the deepest corner of his mind, a nagging voice kept repeating itself. The worst would be facing Death itself. It had been almost an hour since Bob and Jane had disappeared into the Home, looking for a certain Doctor Bernette. As expected, both Aaron and Angel weren't allowed entrance and AJ had to leave behind and take care of them. A few meters away, a group of teenagers around his age were shooting some balls. He leaned his back against the car and let his thoughts lingered. What would they say to the Twins when they woke up and realized they weren't allowed to see their brother? How does it feel to be forced to live in a Home and cut away from family and friends? How does it feel like to know that your days are numbered? How does it feels like to constantly live in fear, not knowing when Death decides to pay a visit? A sudden shot of pain that ran up his left leg broke him away from his thoughts. He looked down and saw the orange ball spinning next to him. He bent down and picked it up. Ever since Nick left, he had never touched a basketball again. The team not only lost Nick, they lost AJ too. "Sorry about that. Are you okay?" AJ looked up and his heart nearly stopped. He had blonde messy flops that tousled in the warm wind. His eyes piercing blue and that trade sly smile on his face. He thought it was Nick. "It's nothing really, I'm fine. I believe this is yours." AJ smiled, returning the ball. "Yeah.our bearings not that good as it used to be, ya know?" He smiled. "Are you here for a visit?" "Yeah. It's our first time here so we're kinda nervous." AJ replied. "Oh, you're here for Ben?" "Ben? No.I'm here to see Nick, he just came in a week ago." AJ replied. "Nick?" "Yeah. Looks like you actually. Blonde, blue eyed." "What's his last name? Maybe I know him." "Carter." "Carter? And you said he came in a week ago?" "Pretty much, yeah." AJ replied. "But we only had two new comers here and both came in two weeks ago. Tracy James and Ben Anderson." "Oh?" AJ raised his eyebrow. How could that be, he wondered. Before he could ask any further, he saw Jane and Bob coming out of the Home. Jane had to be supported by Bob as she limply walked towards them. Something's just not right and AJ could feel it in every bone of his body. "Oh no." AJ turned towards the boy, he suddenly looked so sad. "Why 'oh no' ?" AJ asked. For the first time, he realized that his face was pale. Could Nick look this sick? "Can I ask you something?" The young man asked. "Sure." AJ replied, although his eyes were still studying at the wrecked figure of Jane and Bob. What was wrong with Nick? "Did you by any chance know the name of the Volunteer who took your friend?" AJ couldn't be bothered about the young man, his mind was too distraught to think. Whatever it was that had shook both Bob and Jane that badly, he knew it would be really bad. "Er.Kevin.I think.Kevin.something." "Kevin Richardson?" "Yeah, that's him. I think." "Then your friend is not here." "What?" AJ turned to look at the young man. Now he could really see how sick the boy look. And he wasn't making sense. "Look him up in the hospital." He smiled and left with the ball. AJ wondered why he had left so sudden but found out that Bob and Jane were already behind him. A whole new world greeted him there. Both Jane and Bob wore matching red, swollen eyes. AJ stared at them expectantly, waiting for them to say something. "Well?" AJ asked. "Oh Alex." AJ's heart stopped beating. They never call him Alex unless it was bad news. None offered more than that. They started crying again. "What's wrong? Tell me!" AJ begged. Bob revealed the urn that he had been hiding behind his jacket. He held it close to his chest and started hugging Jane even tighter. AJ stared at the urn and shook his head. It couldn't be happening. His worst nightmare had just turned true. "Oh God no." - Kevin almost flew up the winding stairs, careful not to hit anyone on his path and rushed straight to the first room on the third floor. The door was slightly ajar and from where he was standing, he could hear someone vomiting faintly. He pushed the door opened and let himself in. "I got here as fast as I could, what happened?" Kevin asked as he saw Howie standing at the entrance of the small shower room. "We don't know what to do." Howie stammered, pointing towards the room. Kevin took a peek inside and saw Nick lying on his side on the cold floor, his body was shivering and the empowering smell of bile filled his nostrils. His head was propped up on Brian's knees, who was pulling back whatever strands of hair off his face, wiping the cold sweat in the process. Brian knew how much it had hurt him when he had his first ever session. He had came back to his room throwing up most of the time and feeling very sick. And after being in there for almost two years, he had never seen anyone suffering as much as Nick. This had him and Howie went into panic attack. They had simply threw him into the room and Nick had pulled himself up and went straight to the shower room. He was throwing up wildly and as expected, he and Howie had rushed by his side, giving him the support that he needed. But Nick never get better. He kept throwing up even when there was nothing to throw. And then came the shock. His nose bled. That had never happened to him or Howie. And from what they had heard from friends on their floor, none had ever complained of a nose bled. It wasn't one of the side effects. When he had collapsed on the ground, Nick wouldn't let anyone touch him. When Brian tried to move him away to a better ventilated area of the room, he had screamed and begged him to stop. He was hurting and Brian doesn't understand where the pain had came from. Howie was too scared to do anything. He had watched too many of his friends died because of Darla. Although he liked Nick, he had not yet had the opportunity to get really close to him and he figured that would be the best way. He figured if he knew little about him, it doesn't have to ached so much when he died. Although he'd rather prefer to die himself than watch anybody else die. Kevin went into the cramped shower room and saw for the first time the trail of blood on the floor. "He's bleeding!" "His nose bled and we can't stop it since he didn't let us touch him." Brian replied. Kevin shook his head and placed his hand on Nick's shoulder and attempted to pull him back so that he would lye on his back. But Nick flinched at the touch and groaned loudly. Nick was indeed in pain. "What did they do to you Nick?" Kevin whispered as he carefully inspected his face. The right side of his face was swollen and slightly bruised. He accidentally touched the back of his shoulder and he felt Nick flinched. "It hurts when I touched you?" Kevin asked. Nick nodded weakly. "I have to see what it is that's hurting you. Try not to scream okay? I can't afford to have the doctor find me here." Nick nodded. He untie the draw strings that held the hospital gown together. Normally, they would let the boys change into their own clothes first before leaving the session. Kevin bet they were getting tired waiting for Nick to get dressed. As soon as the garment was opened, he saw patches of red circles on different parts of his body. In the middle of the patches the red was darker and he could see the glint of fresh blood that was beginning to ooze out of it. "Oh God! What is that?" Brian asked. "I've never had those!" Howie gasped. "What did they do to you? This is horrible!" Brian fumed. Kevin shook his head. They had began to treat them like animals. How much longer could they suffer like that? He shuddered at the thoughts of what they had done to Kristin. What they had done to female patients living on the other wing of the Home. "Nick, I have to carry you back to your bed. This place is not a good place for you to sleep. Can you bear with it for a while?" Kevin asked. Nick bit his lips and nodded in agreement. Brian watched as Kevin lifted his friend up and instantly, the young man started pleading to be put down. He couldn't watch the scene any longer. Every part of his body was telling him to run away, to get out of the room and shut the pain behind. But he knew there was nowhere to go out of that room. Nothing good ever awaits for him out there. This room had been his prison. Yet this room had also been his only solace. "Please, put me down! I will walk to bed, please, just put me down!" "You can't even stand up on your own Nick. I'm sorry, I can't put you down." Kevin replied calmly as he fastened his pace towards his bed. Howie shut whatever emotions he had left opened. His eyes locked on a branch of leaves out of the window. Like a finger tapping on glass, telling him to jump off and follow it to freedom. Maybe, someday, when he couldn't take any of it anymore, he would. But not just yet. He turned to look at the figure lying on the bed now. He was so helpless. The skin around his eyes were swollen and flushed. His lips dry and parched. The blonde flocks now limped and soaked in his sweat. His body showed signs of shivers, almost lifeless. All these he swallowed in without having to feel anything. His emotions were securely sealed. He watched as Kevin attempted to undress him and the shock reaction he saw on both his face and Brian's. He saw it too but his face was expressionless. He felt the stake going for his heart but he broke it in two before it managed to pierced right through. Nick had patches of red circles on his entire body like the ones they saw on his back earlier on. But Howie couldn't cry or try to understand his pain. He froze himself off emotions and retreated from everything else. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ "How could they burn his body without your consent!" AJ cried at Jane and Bob. The service for Nick Carter's funeral ended five hours ago. It had been two days since their trip to the Home. Two days since AJ found out that his best friend had died. Jane and Bob had explained to him time and again what was told to them but none of it seemed to convince the young rebellion. "AC, are you awake?" Aaron squinted his eyes and found a pair of large brown eyes staring back at him. He had tried his best to pretend to be asleep because his dad had told him that he needed Angel to have some rest. He assumed he had done a bad job at pretending. "Go to sleep Angie." Aaron whispered as he closed his eyes again. "I can't." Angel replied as she moved her body closer to her twin. She felt cold all of a sudden. Like as if she was alone, too free for a target to cause harm. She felt insecure and scared but being only five, she couldn't understand any of the emotions she was feeling. "Close your eyes and sleep." Aaron replied, sounding a bit irritated. "AC?" "Hmm." "Is Nicky really dead?" Aaron's eyes shot open at the mention of Nick. His eyes welled up in tears and soon Angel's features were just blurry images in his eyes. "I.I think so." Aaron quivered. "How could you be so sure?" Angel asked calmly. "Because Mom and Dad said so. Because we just buried him today." Aaron cried. Angel nodded her head. Of course Nick was dead. Dad had explained to them time and again. How Nick was so sick and couldn't get better as they had expected. Dad said he had sleep and just never wakes up anymore. Dad said Nick is in heaven, waiting for all of them. Dad said they will all meet him again one day. Angel wanted that one day to be that day. She missed him so much. "AC?" "Yeah." "Who's going to tie my hair up when mom's busy?" "I could learn.I want to be like Nick." Aaron smiled. Angel giggled. "Yeah.and I will learn how to play basketball with you." "That would be great. I'm sure Nick will help us." Aaron smiled. Angel nodded her head and closed her eyes. Aaron watched as her sister drifted into a peaceful sleep. Aaron turned to look at the picture of Nick and him together on the bedside table. They could never have one of those days again. Never would they run in the park and just fool around. Never would they have their big brother taking them to the fair and show them around when everyone else his age would be embarrass to be seen with their baby brother or sister. Nick had been one of a kind. Aaron wondered if he could give all that to his sister. "I could try Nicky.I could be a good brother to Angel. But who's gonna be my big brother?" Aaron whispered. Nobody answered. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ "AJ please, don't make it any harder on us. You have to let go." Jane cried as she tried to calm the young man down. "Let go of what? Those ashes you had kept stored in some mortuary?" AJ asked. "How could I let go when they don't even let us say goodbye?" It was heartbreaking. Jane and Bob had entered the Home with spirits so high. That day, they will be reunited again with their son. The son who will flourish the Carter's name. The son will see through College and led a good life. A son whom they could be proud of. All those dreams shattered when they were told that their son's condition had gone from bad to worst in a matter of two hours. That he had breathed his last while they were on their way to see him. The doctor said that Nick had told them that he couldn't wait any longer. That it was hurting him so much to hold on. He told them to tell his parents and family how much he loved them and appreciate everything they had given him. Their son had died in the arms of strangers. In a stranger's bed, in a stranger's room, in a strange place he couldn't quite call home. Was he happy while it had last or was he in constant pain ever since they took him there? Was he suffering too much? Was he unhappy and depressed at being so lonely that had drove the disease to work rapidly against his body? They would never know. And what frustrated them was for the fact that they had incinerated his body without their consent. That their reason being such a diseased corpse should not be left unattended for long. That it was risky to the health of everyone else if he were to start to decay. She couldn't see her baby's face for the last time. She couldn't run her fingers through his hair and whispers him comforts in times when he was in pain. Pain. How her baby had battled and suffered the pain of Darla alone that Home. He had held on to his least breath, hoping and waiting to see them for what would be the last time and they were too late. How much had he suffered that he couldn't hold on a little bit longer for their arrival? Sending her son away to the Home was the stupidest decision she had ever made. "Forgive me Nick." Her heart kept crying out over and over again. Now, looking at how angry AJ was, she could only see Nick standing in his place, yelling and pointing his finger towards her, blaming for everything. ~*~*~*~*~*~ By now, you are beginning to despise whoever they are who supported this little propaganda. You wish you could do something but you're helpless. You feel sorry for what they did to me. You feel sorry for the web of lies they spawned for my family and friends. You started asking questions of how this could have go on and you had not known of its existence. Realization doomed upon you that all these time, while you were living your lives like everyone else, where this town seemed to be like any other normal place to call home, that there are others who were being tortured and left to die. You begin to question the people who run this town. The people you trusted upon your safety and well being of your family. And at the end of the day, only one thing remained. Whatever it was that had happened and whatever that is now, you felt helpless. What you just saw was just the tiny cracks on the wall, the beginning of how Darla and what these heinous beings had done to me and my family. I have four hundred of such friends battling the same war as I am right now. Thousands more had lost their lives towards something that held no meaning nor purpose to them. And only God knows how many others might fall victim in the future. And let me remind you that this is just something that happened in Ebay Town. The same thing is happening in other towns in this country. If you do the maths, that would be countless of people like me suffering and millions of families had their lives shattered. But that's too big for you to even begin to imagine. Let's start small. Let's start with YOU. What would have happen if YOU had Darla? Or your loved one had Darla. Would you still say that I'm starting this small? No. Because as much as it pains you to see others suffering, nothing else could ever shatter your hearts into pieces more than when it hits close to home. For my family, I died. But in the Home where I had learnt to call prison, death was something that was zooming in closer everyday.