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I didn't know what I was doing here. I stood at the grave sight once more. What happened was something I have never excepted. I don't know went wrong, and still til this day I regret what happened. I can feel my heartbeat beat slowly, and I looked at the white roses I held in my hand. I can feel myself start to shake. I felt loss and out of placed. I can feel a tear start to gradually go down my cheek. I layed the roses on the gravesight and kneeled down to put them there. I stared intently name on the grave. It only happened a year ago, when she died. Why didn't I reach her in time. All these thoughts and questions started racing in my mind. I looked up watch and I knew that this was the last time I would come here again.

I took sometime to think, just standing there. The time seemed to rapidly go at a slow pace. I was there for a reason and knew that this was my last goodbye. I needed to do something I should of done a long time ago.

I reached into my pocket of my black jeans, and took a letter out that I had written to her after she died.

I read it out loud, meaning to get this out in the open.

Honeybear,

Those years that we have spent have been meaningfull and the memories will be in my heart forever. The first time we met, I never felt with anybody in my entire life. You have completed me . I can't desribe anything about you because you are a beautiful person and my angel. I look back on the years that we have spent time together and I can't help smiling because I'd always look back on what we have shared together. When you wake up in arms, I never felt so happy just to lay with you while you were in the comfort of my arms. Your gorgeous long blonde hair and looking up at those big green eyes. You were full of life and had so much in you. I wake up now, alone but thinking of you constantly. You were my soulmate and my honeybear. I love you babe, I will.

Love,

Nick Carter


I layed the letter next to the flowers, and suddenly I can feel the wind blow. I knew she was here, watching over me. As I did for her. I smiled and walked to my black mercedes-benz and started the car. I drove out of sight, as the sun set.