Nick opened his eyes and shifted them around the room slowly, finally landing on AJ and then Brian. They had both been waiting by his bed anxiously to wake up. The resident had left not even ten minutes ago.

“Nick, how ya feeling?” Brian asked softly.

“Yeah, man, you scared the hell out of us.” AJ added.

“What...?” Nick whispered. The sedation hadn’t completely worn off and he still looked pretty out of it.

Brian glanced at AJ uncomfortably, not sure how to answer Nick. He didn’t want to say that he had a panic attack and then Nick want to know why. But what was the use in trying to hide it? Nick would have to know sooner or later.

“You had a panic attack.” AJ said quietly.

Nick’s eyes widened. The expression on his face changed from one of confusion to despair.

Brian’s heart fell. “You saw the news huh?” He asked quietly.

Nick nodded, the tears coming.

“Nick...” Brian started. Nick just shook his head miserably. “No, Nick, listen to me. You cannot let this tear you apart. Do you hear me? You have come too far in this. You’ve just started getting better. The doctor’s say you are going to make a full recovery. You can’t give up now.” Brian said emphatically.

“But Lizz...and her...” Nick whispered.

“It’s awful that that happened, but you can’t dwell on that. You have to learn from it. By giving up you won’t help anyone. There are too many people that need you.” AJ said.

Nick shook his head. “No one...” His voice was barely audible.

Brian stopped him. “Yes they do! You family needs you, your fans need you, the Backstreet Boys need you. I need you, Nick. And what about Lizz? She needs you. You two have barely been able to talk to each other since this happened, but you have been helping each other more than you know. You have to keep fighting.”

Nick nodded. He didn’t look totally convinced, but he did look a little better. He scrunched up his face in concentration. After a moment he asked quietly, “Lizz?”

“She’s in Tulsa getting the transplant, remember? The surgery was supposed to last just a few hours so she should be out...” Brian stopped and checked his watch. His jaw dropped. “Crap.” He turned to AJ and spoke softly. “She should have been out hours ago and Kyung promised to call as soon as she was out!”

“Don’t fret yet, maybe Kyung forgot. I’m sure it’s kind of crazy down there.” AJ tried to calm the urgency in Brian’s voice.

Nick watched the exchange nervously. They were speaking too softly for him to hear what they were saying, but he knew it was bad when he saw the look on Brian’s face. “What?!” He demanded loudly.

Brian glanced at Nick. “Ah, nothing. I’m going to page Kyung to call me back. We can find out how she is.” He pulled out his cell phone and dialed the numbers. They waited quietly for a few minutes. Nick was getting worried. He didn’t know how long he was out for, but it seemed like Lizz had left many hours ago. A kidney transplant shouldn’t have taken this long should it?

“I hope everything is going smoothly there. Kyung was telling me that they knew a lot of people in Tulsa and she hoped it wouldn’t be a chaotic mess like it was here. She did say that Lizz wanted to come here after the surgery. She was pissed that she didn’t get to say bye to you, Nick.” Brian said.

“Will they transfer her back here?” AJ asked.

Brian shrugged. Nick looked like he was ready to say something, but then Brian’s cell chirped.

AJ and Nick’s attention was totally focused on Brian as he answered his cell phone. Although they hung on every word on Brian’s end of the conversation, neither were able to decipher what was happening with Lizz.

“Lizz is out of surgery and in the Surgical Intensive Care Unit,” Brian said as he closed his cell phone up.

“And?” AJ pressed for more information.

“And so far it appears that the transplants were successful,” Brian replied.

Nick slowly formed the words to his question. “Is....she.....awake?”

Brian shook his head no. “I’m afraid not yet, they have her pretty sedated and she’s on a ventilator.”

Nick started shaking his head, his eyes filling with tears.

“Nick, it’s probably common after surgery. They said they were able to give Lizz new lungs from the same body so I’m assuming they put people on a ventilator after a lung transplant,” Brian suggested.

“It’s all my fault,” Nick said quietly.

“No it’s not,” Brian replied, rubbing Nick’s shoulder.

“My fault,” Nick mumbled quietly. Deep down he felt that there was nothing that Brian or AJ could say or do that would make him change his mind about shouldering the blame for what happened to Lizz.

Lizz’s eyes fluttered open as she quickly scanned the unfamiliar room. Her eyes fell on Kyung, curled up in a chair next to her bed. There were so many questions that Lizz wanted to ask. She slowly reached up and touched the vent tubing; she knew she had no other choice but to wait for Kyung to wake up.

“Good morning Lizz, glad to see you’re awake,” a nurse cheerily stated to Lizz as she breezed into the room.

Kyung jumped, startled by the nurses voice.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were still here,” the nurse apologized.

Kyung stretched. “It’s okay, I really don’t want to be sleeping when Lizz is awake. Hi honey, how are you feeling?”

Lizz managed to roll her eyes in reply to Kyung.

“That bad, eh? Felt like you were run over by a Mac Truck?”

Lizz blinked her eyes twice for yes, it was the system her and Kyung were accustomed to from the last time she was on a vent.

Kyung laughed. “I figured as much.”

As she set about adjusting Lizz’s pillows and blankets to make her feel more comfortable she sighed deeply when her eyes met up with Lizz’s.

“Oh god, Lizz, can’t you just worry about getting yourself stronger right now? I think you’re pretty important and I don’t like seeing you run yourself down by worrying about Nick.”

Lizz’s frown didn’t fade.

“I just talked to Brian to update him on how you were and I told him you were doing good, but would need rest.” Kyung sighed again. “Oh honestly Lizz, I didn’t ask how Nick was but I’m sure he’s doing better.”

Lizz continued to stare at Kyung. She knew that eventually her wishes would be figured out. Kyung and she had shared that type of bond, each knowing what the other was thinking.

“But you can’t talk to him silly, you’re on a vent....alright, alright, I’m dialing him right now, you are so stubborn.”

Lizz let her body relax a bit. Her mission was accomplished. She dismissed the intense pain she was feeling from the incisions and was silently praying that the nurse would hold off injecting the morphine into her IV line just a little longer until after she got to hear Nick’s voice.

“Hi Brian, it’s Kyung again. Are you still with Nick?”

“Yup, haven’t left his room yet,” Brian replied.