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"Denver, don't touch that! Chelsea, quit hitting your brother! James, no! AJ!!!!!!" I yelled.

None of the kids listened to me. I was standing in the middle of the living room, holding Brian's youngest son, Robby, as I tried to calm down the other kids. AJ was upstairs on the phone COMPLETELY ignoring the fact that I was downstairs alone with four wild children.

"What?!" He called back annoyed.

"Get down here and help me!" I sounded like a mother. Not a good tone of voice for me.

"I'm on the phone!" He yelled.

"I don't give a-" I stopped myself in time. I couldn't curse in front of these kids. Instead I yelled, "I don't care! You agreed to help me so you'd better get down here and change this friggin baby's diaper cuz God knows I'm not gonna!"

"Stop YELLING!" Chelsea, who was two screamed.

I sighed heavily and sat down on the couch with Robby, who was crying. As Chelsea sat on the floor with her eyes closed, covering her ears with her hands and screaming. James, the four year old, tried to wrestle with Denver. But I wasn't going to stop them. Oh no. I was going to wait until AJ got down here.

I sat like this for a few minutes until AJ came running down the stairs. "What's going on?" He asked, looking at all the mayhem going on around him. As he walked over to Denver and James he asked me, "Why aren't you dealing with this?"

"I have only enough energy for one kid at this time." I told him as I watched him pull James off of Denver.

AJ first dealt with James and Denver. "James, go to the corner. You have a time-out for five minutes, okay?"

"But," James whined, "I don't wanna!"

"I don't care if you want to. Go." AJ ordered. He looked at Denver and said, "And you go sit down and watch TV."

Denver ran happily to the couch and crawled up next to me. He was obviously happy that James was off of him. I watched as AJ then went over to Chelsea.

He kneeled down next to her. "What's the matter, sweetie?" He asked her, putting his hand on her shoulder to get her attention.

Chelsea stopped screaming and looked up at him, uncovering her ears. "Too loud." She told him, pointing to Robby.

"It's okay now, baby." He said. He left her on the floor as he got up. He walked over to me and took Robby from me. "Are you afraid to change a diaper?" He asked me.

I nodded. "I don't change diapers." I told him, "What if it pees in my mouth?"

AJ rolled his eyes. "That's only on TV." He said, "Now watch them, okay? Don't let James leave the corner till I come back."

I nodded and shrugged my shoulders. At least I didn't have to change the diaper. AJ walked towards the downstairs bathroom. I looked at Chelsea who was now turned around and also watching TV. Denver was also, but was sitting next to me. He was so cute! James was facing the corner with his arms crossed, looking down. I could tell that this kid would be trouble later on, just like Jared. It's probably how they all start off...

"Can I play now?" James asked, turning to look at me.

I shook my head. "Not yet. Not until AJ says you can." I told him.

"But AJ is not my baby-sitter. You are." He reminded me.

I nodded. "But AJ is my dad, thus meaning he has control over everything in this household and if we disobey his rules we will all be penalized for it and nobody wants that now do we?" I questioned.

"Huh?"

I sighed. Juveniles. I stated it more simply for him. "If you don't listen to him you get in trouble."

"Oh...but he's not my daddy! He can't tell me what to do!" James argued.

"But he can tell your daddy and you'll get in trouble." I reminded him.

James gave up and turned back to the wall. This kid doesn't know how to keep up! I could have argued for hours on this subject! Except of course, AJ came out of the bathroom holding Robby.

"Okay, he's all clean now." He told me, "Right, Robby? You're all clean!"

Robby giggled. He seemed to like AJ. How is it that AJ is so good with kids?

Oh. That's right. Me. My bad. Forgot.

"Okay, James. Your time-out is all done. You can come out of the corner now." AJ told him.

"Are you gonna tell my daddy?" James wanted to know first.

"Not if you promise not to do anything like that again." AJ told him.

"I promise." James said with a smile as he ran out of the corner and back to his toys.

AJ looked at me. He probably knew as much as I did that that was a total lie. James would probably get in trouble later that day after his dad comes to pick him up.

"We've got to get Robby and Chelsea to sleep." AJ told me. It was only 8:00, but those were Brian's orders. James didn't have to go to sleep until 8:30, and neither did Denver.

Chelsea overheard. "Now?" She whined.

AJ nodded. "Yup, so come on. I'll read you a story." He told her.

"Any story?" Chelsea asked.

"Any one you want." He told her.

Chelsea jumped up and down happily. She went over to AJ who took her hand.

"This'll take a while. By the time I get done, it'll be time to put Denver and James to sleep." He told me as he walked out of the living room, holding Robby in one arm, and holding Chelsea's hand with the other.

I shook my head. AJ was too damn good with kids. How often did he watch them? Jesus, he must not have a life or something.

As I watched TV with the other two, they began to fall asleep. James head kept bobbing up and down, until he finally laid down on the floor and closed his eyes. Denver fell asleep on my arm. With his mouth open. I hope he doesn't start to drool. Eeew...

At around 8:20, they had both fallen asleep. AJ was still with Chelsea, probably still reading to her. I picked up Denver and walked to the room they would all be sleeping in. Sure enough AJ was sitting on the edge of Chelsea's bed reading some babyish book. AJ looked up from the book for a moment and saw me with Denver. He pointed to the bed next to the one Chelsea was in.

"Read." Chelsea demanded, pointing to the book.

AJ smiled at her and went back to reading from the book. I left the room to go get James. AJ should be happy that he doesn't have to read to any more kids.

James was curled up in a ball still when I went to go get him. I picked him up and he opened his eyes slightly.

"Jay..." He muttered, looking past me.

I turned my head and saw AJ standing there. "Let me take him." He said.

He walked over to me and took James. I could have carried him...He's not THAT big. Hmph. He thinks I'm weak. Well I'll show him. Or not. I'm fine with it either way.

I followed AJ upstairs and to the room all the ickle kiddykins {AN: Don't ask... } were sleeping in. I stood in the doorway as AJ put James down next to Chelsea. Since they are brother and sister ya know.

"Night, Jay." James said to him as he walked to the door.

AJ turned around. "Goodnight, James." He said.

After he turned off the light and closed the door halfway, I said, "Now I gotta go downstairs and watch MTV."

AJ followed me down the stairs and asked, "MTV? Since when do you watch MTV?"

"Since always. All Things Rock is on." I told him, "It's the only thing I watch on MTV. Besides Cribs."

"I was on that." AJ told me proudly.

"I know. I sat. I watched. I left halfway through." I said.

I knew AJ was probably rolling his eyes or shaking his head behind me. I have a gift, I know. A gift to frustrate, annoy, and sometimes piss the hell outta people. Actually, more like always piss the hell outta people.

When I got to the living room, I flopped onto the couch and changed the channel from Nickelodeon to MTV. All Things Rock was halfway over. Damn kids. Making me watch Rugrats.

AJ sat in a different chair and watched also. He didn't say anything. "I take it you don't like this kind of music." I said between videos.

AJ shrugged. "I like it. I could honestly care less."

I smiled. "Yeah right," I said, "You're just watching this because I'm making you, huh?"

"No, of course not! I could change the channel at any time. I do have more power in this house than you do." I said.

"Yeah sure, Mr. Bigshot. You're the almighty ruler. What?"

"Huh?"

"Nothing."

"You said what."

"Jeez...Get off the drugs." I said slowly.

I laughed to myself as AJ turned back to the TV, confused. I love doing that to people. I'm not evil. What? Gotcha...

**************

AJ tried to steal the remote control away from me when All Things Rock was over. I smacked him upside the head. But it didn't work. He's downstairs watching God knows what and I'm sitting in my room listening to the radio. I found a decent station at least.

When it was almost 10:00, I went back downstairs. It was almost time for Brian and Nick to come by and pick up their kids. Who, I might add, have not cried or anything once since AJ and I had laid them down to sleep. Thank God for that...

"So, Nick and Brian should be here soon." AJ said when I went back into the living room.

I nodded and sat down next to him. "How the hell does Brian put up with three kids?" I asked him.

AJ laughed and shook his head. "I have no idea. They're crazy, huh?"

"Well that James is." I said.

"James is cool." AJ told me, "He does share part of my name."

"Oh and that makes him so incredibly awesome." I said.

"That it does, that it does." AJ said.

We sat silently as AJ looked through some magazine and I watched the movie that was on. Hardball. I first saw this movie when I was younger and thought it was awesome. I've seen it about a thousand times since then.

The doorbell rang at 10:10. AJ and I both stood up lazily and I followed him to the door. He opened it and Brian was standing there with Leighanne and Nick was with his girlfriend, Toni. {AN: There ya go, girl!}

"Hey, sorry we're late." Leighanne said.

AJ shrugged. "Don't worry about it." He said.

Don't worry about it? DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT?! You?re 10 goddamn minutes late! You owe us! ...I'm just kidding! I'm not THAT cold.

AJ let them inside. "So were they all good?" Toni asked.

I figured I should answer that one since AJ wasn't there half of the time. "Yeah, they were all good. They're upstairs sleeping now." I told them.

That's when Robert's cries rang through the house. Brian sighed. "I'll go get him." He said.

"I'll help you." Leighanne said and followed him upstairs.

"We'll go get Denver." Nick said, "He's probably awake now."

I watched as Nick and Toni walked upstairs. "How much do I get paid for this?" I asked AJ.

"I don't know. But it better be a helluva lot." AJ said.

Precisely what I was thinking. And I'd like it all in cash please.

A few minutes later the four of them walked back downstairs with all the kids. Brian held Robert and Chelsea held onto his leg, making it hard for him to walk down the stairs. I couldn't help but laugh. Toni noticed and picked up Chelsea for him. Nick held Denver and Leighanne had a still soundly sleeping James in her arms.

When they got to the front door, Nick said, "Thanks a lot Kelly. We didn't think you'd watch them on such short notice."

"What can I say? I'm a sickeningly sweet child." I said.

I noticed Brian and Nick exchange glances. Like they knew something...

"Hey! I am." I argued.

"Never said you weren't." Nick said.

"Yeah yeah." I said, "And now..." I held out my hand expectantly.

"Kelly." AJ hissed.

I looked at him, my hand still extended. "What? I went through with my end of the deal. It's their turn."

Leighanne laughed. "No, she's right, AJ. We have to pay her." She turned to Brian. "Pay her, sweetie."

"Yeah, sweetie, pay me." I said. "That sounded so wrong." I added as an afterthought.

Brian reached into his back pocket for his wallet. He opened it and pulled out some bills, handing them to me. "I hope that's enough."

I counted the money. It was about 85 dollars. "Eh, it'll do." I said.

AJ poked me hard in the back. I jumped. "Ow!" I said, "Hello, that hurt! Jesus, such rage this man has."

"She's just like you, AJ." Toni said, "Well, from what I know about you."

"I am not anything like him. In any way shape or form. I'm too pretty." I said, "Well, goodnight everybody. Drive safely. Don't crash or anything like that."

"Night, Kelly." They all said together.

Note to self: Too much time spent with people = talking in unison. Scary.