"What are you smiling at?" AJ whispered to him.
Nick shrugged back. "None of your business," he snapped.
"Well stop it, you look like a dumbass." AJīs eyes darkened, still grinning at the reporters infront of them. To outsiders it looked like they were chatting friendly istead of biting each others heads off.
Nick smiled. That came with the territory. Smile, never let anyone know how shitty you are feeling. That was their number one rule. SMILE!
He stiffled a groan not to show anyone how uncomfortable he was feeling. If Johnny ever listened to him he wouldnīt be stuck in a situation like this. Feeling like something the cat dragged in. His back ached and it didn't make it any better that he had to wear those tight jeans. Jeans that he was too bloated to button. He was actually grateful that the table infront of him hid his little "secret". It would be too embarresing if anyone spotted that he was too fat to even button his own jeans. He felt like a bloated whale. Oh how he wished that he hadnīt overdulged himself on all that food.
Another groan escaped his lips at the thought of all the food he had eaten. It was rolling around in his stomach, making him even more bloated than ever. At that point all Nick wanted to do was to curl up in a ball and sleep the misery away. He swallowed hard as a burp suddenly appeared from nowhere. Shit! He didnt want to embarress himself with belching infront of the European media. There were no telling what the headlines would be.
Brian must have discovered his discomfort as he turned his way, mouthing, "Everything Okay?" There was concern in the Kentuckian's eyes.
"Mhm.." Nick nodded as he continued to stare down at the table, feeling miserable. If his stomach and back was making him want to throw in the towel it was nothing compared to the discolor his eyes were. The makeup artist had worked hard trying to cover up the black and blue eye that was forming in his face. Evidence that AJ thought he was nothing but a stupid ass. He didn't know what hurt most. The fact that he got hit or the fact that AJ had stared at him like he wanted him to disappear from the face of the Earth!
He most have zoned off beacuse the next thing he knew he felt an elbow hitting him in his side, making him wince at the impact that crushed against his ribs. Looking at his side he saw AJ grinning at him. There was no doubt that the short man was responsible for yet another violent injury. God how he hated that he always had to sit beside him. Bone was pretty okay, but he could be a pain in the ass sometimes. Especially when he was bored. And Nick knew that his friend longed so much after Amanda and Nick had to take alot of heat.
"Pay attention," AJ wheezed through gritted teeth. "They asked you a question."
"Oh." Boy did he feel stupid. Turning to the waiting reporters he flashed a toothy smile. "Yes? What did you want to know?" Deep inside he prayed that they wouldn't ask him a private question and instead asked something about the album they had were planning to record in the fall. Yet he knew that it would be a fat chance and steeled himself for answering whether or not he wore boxers or briefs. What was it with that question anyway that seemed to intrigue so many reporters?
A female reporter looked up at him smiling. He smiled back. Politely. "What have you done with your eye?" she asked with a broad accent. "Where you in a fight?"
The silence that followed was so thick that you could cut it with a knife. Fifty pair of eyes stared at him, no doubt awaiting for him to fuck up with the answer. Nick fidgeted uncomfortably. Why did reporters always try to get him on the spot? Thoughts moved in his head as he tried desperately to find a suitable answer. An answer that the journalists wouldn't disect like a dead frog in biology class.
Nick licked his lips nervously, his stomach doing lazy churns as the journalist was ancipating to find out the "truth" of his injury. It didn't make the problem less as he could feel Kevin's piercing eyes burn him in his back. 'Please,' he begged desperatly, 'Please don't let me fuck up!' It was so easy to say the wrong things.
When he opened his mouth to answer he heard Kevin's barritone voice say, "Nick was playing basketball when he was hit with a ball and.." He didn't get to end his sentence before another journalist interrupted him rudely.
"Why dont we get to hear from the main source himself, Mr. Carter, what happened?" The man turned towards Nick, setting his eyes in him, asking in a doubting tone, "Is that the truth? Mr. Carter?"
Oh no. Now they really had him. The teen shifted uncomfortably in his chair. Feeling like he wanted to vanish, to fly from the room. Usually he had nothing against answering questions like this, but Johnny had made sure that if there were any unwanted publicity they would be in for a real treat. And Nick thought he had enough problems as it was.
"Yeah," Nick mumbled as he cleared his voice, "Like Kev was saying I was playing B'ball when I missed a ball and wham," he demonstrated with his hands how the ball had hit him, happy that his acting lessons were paying off. "I got this black eye." The famous Nick Carter smile combined with a small embarressed laugh had the journalists soon eating from his palm.
All but one reporter who said in an sarcastic tone, "Must have been a really hard ball."
"Yeah I am well known for my hard shots," Brian added with a smile, and there was a relaxed laugh in the crowd. They had once again managed to hide the truth from the press. If they would have gotten a dollar for everytime they told a "white lie" to save a situation, or go around the truth, they would have been rich by now.
"What a dork!" AJ said with a grin, as he patted Nick playfully on his shoulder. This had the crowd ahh-ing with delight. If there was something the reporters loved it was when the boys showed off that they were "brothers". Nick could have sworn that there was a hint of regret in his friends eyes. But it would take alot for AJ to actually tell anyone the real truth about the "accident" and Johnny had forbid that such things would be revealed. Brian laughed too, but it didn't reach his eyes. Howie on the other hand did not. He sensed as always that all wasnīt right in Nick Carter land.
Hoping that this was the last set of questions Nick turned back to study the table, leaving the rest of the guys to continue with the press conference. This was one of the advantages of being in a group. He could always let someone else do the dirty work and instead space away. Nick had never liked it when there were too many people surrounding him. It made him feel nervous and when he was nervous he started to stutter, saying the wrong things and got sick to his stomach. It was different depending on day. Whether it was a good or a bad day. Today was a day when he lacked more self confidence than ever.
Brian's words that he was getting fat and that it was starting to show burned worse that a cigarrette burn inside his heart. His hand trailed under the table, feeling his stomach and all he felt was fat. Sloppy fat that made him sick.
Was Brian right after all? That he was fat?
His stomach still hurt from the overeating, reminding him of his latest weakness. He wished that he hadn't gone that far. He was a pig! A fat, ugly pig. The more he thought about it the fatter he felt. Nick moaned quietly as his stomach rumbled loudly. Maybe if he could purge he would feel fine again. Then he wouldn't be fat anymore. The more he thought about it the more comforting it felt, and soon he couldn't wait until he was out of the room. In private.
Once again he was lost in his own thoughts when he Kevin snarled to him, "Nick they are talking to YOU!"
Shit! Nick pricked up his ears. Did he miss another question? This did not look good at all. He looked up at the crowd, smiling apologetically. He heard Kevin saying that it had been a long travel and that he appologized so much on Nick's behalf that he wasn't with them all today. He also added for good meassure that they had all been suffering from the flu and were not entirely well yet. That was just half truth since Howie was the only one still affected by the disease. He was coughing and sniffling, blowing the red stopped up nose ever so often. Nick almost felt sorry for him. Yet Howie managed to show that nice side that had more or less become his trademark.
Another Backstreet smile, combined with a flashing with his eyes and Nick had them all on his side again, "I'm sorry I didnt catch that last question." he said softly, coughing slightly to make a point. If it was something that weakened the reporters it was when one of them didn't feel one hundred percent. This he used like a pro.
"Mr. Carter there is a rumour that you have been hospitalized for a few days. Is that true?"
More private questions. Nick wanted to scream. When would the reporters ever stop digging into their private life? The air got tense again as all eyes were turned towards Nick who blushed nervously. He shifted uneasy, not knowing what to say or do. His eyes trailing over to Kevin, begging the older man to field the question. As on cue, no hesitation Kevin answered, "Yes Nick was in for a small ailment. Nothing to be concerned about he is all well now."
The journalists were not at all satisfield with the answer. They pushed on. "So what is wrong with you Mr. Carter?" a man in a tie with big dots on asked, scribbling down something on the notepad he held infront of him.
"Are you sick?"
"Injured?"
"Will this affect the tour?"
The questions were many and it swirled in Nick's head. Not that he had anything against answering them, but it was the issue of saying the wrong stuff at the wrong time that bugged him. Kevin came forth for him again,
"No, No," the dark man shook his head. "Nick just took a bad fall when he was dancing and he hurt his back a little. "There was a sound going through the room. Holding up his hand Kevin continued, "Nothing serious. But the doctors wanted him to rest up to see so no permanent danger was done." Kevin smiled towards the crowd, "He is fine now." Kevin slapped his little brother in the back, "arenīt you Nick?"
Nick nodded, smiling. Once again Kevin Richardson had come to his rescue.
"You are free to ask the last question," the host announced with a nasal voice. Not a moment too soon for the Backstreet Boys who all felt exhaustion sweep over them. Howie, whos eyes were bright with the cold and fever he still suffered, hid a yawn beneath his hand. Both AJ and Kevin were dying of hunger and Brian needed to go on a bathroom break. For once Nick wasn't the only one that felt distressed.
When it was finally over Nick stood up in a haste. He was about to leave the room when Kevin caught him by his shoulder, "Where do you think youīre going?"
"Out. Isnt it over?" There was surprise ín Nick's voice that was hard to hide.
"We have a photoshoot first," the tall man muttered. Nick wanted to cry. Standing in the flashes was the last thing he wanted today. He looked like total and utter crap and he was sure that even the photographers thought he looked like hell. Fat with a blackeye. Could it get any worse?
"NOW?" Nick groaned involuntarily.
"Yes now," Johnny growled, " Do you have a problem with that Carter?" The manager was sweating, both due to the stressed schedule as well as he was still feeling the effects from the flu that had haunted him for the past week. Their road manager Clark was the latest victim to the Backstreet bug and he was back in the hotel, safetly resting.
Nick shook his head.
"Good, make yourself ready then."
"Can we at least take a short break?" Brian whined, twinning his legs like he was desperate for the facilites. "I am dyyyyiiiinggg to ppeeeeee!" The drama queen in the Kentuckian making an entrance.
"No can do." Johnny shook his head as the host came up, announcing that it was time for the boys to take place on the stage again.
"I will explooodeeee." Brian whined miserably, folding over, doing his best not to hold a certain area of his body.
"Looks like Nicky did that already." AJ laughed as he pointed towards Nicks stomach. Everybodys eyes turned towards his lower region.
"What?" At first the teen didnt follow what was said, then he remembered the unbutton jeans!. Red color crept slowly upon his face as he blushed, pulling down his sweater.
"Yeah but I bet he isnt fixing to explode from wanting to pee." Kevin said with a grin. This statement brought a fit of laughter in the room and Nick wanted to die even more. How embarressing. Desperately he tried to say something biting back, but was saved by the host announcing once more that it was time to go ontage for the photo session. He tried his best not to act like it made him upset but the comments that had followed were not nice at all.
"I had a stomach ache." Nick defended himself, only getting more smiles back. No one believed him.
"Stomach ache? Don't lie Carter." Johnny hissed. When Nick opened his mouth to interject the manager continued irritated, "Get your fatass up there. Now!"
"Yes hurry Nick," Brian wailed, " Lets get this over with before I wet my pants." The short man was not happy at all. He too wanted it to be over as quickly as possible.
The moment the photo session was over all air went out from him. His back was hurting, not to mention his stomach which was constantly reminding him of his own stupidity. The fact that he hadn't got to talk to Manda for a long time made him feel even more miserable. He sulked, walking silently beside Howie as they were on their way out to the waiting van that was going to take them back to the hotel. Fortunately they did not have a show that night, which was good because all Nick wanted to do was lay down, feeling sorry to himself.
"Are you okay?" Howie asked sniffling when Nick had said nothing since they left the room. His brown eyes peered at the teen with a mixture of concern and compassion. "Is it your back that is bothering you again?"
Shaking his head, Nick mumbled, "No." He didn't dare to say anything since tears were threatening to spill over. Exhaustion swept over him like a spirit and suddenly it all felt too much. He was tired of people always nagging at him, thinking that he was a dumbass. That he always fucked up and was immature. No one had said anything to him about how he had zoned out during the interview, but he knew that as soon as they were out of public Johnny would take him aside and chew him out.
Right now that was not something he could take.
