Howie was the band’s snorer. He had an ability to fall asleep everywhere and at anytime which often resulted in loud snoring. AJ on the other hand didnīt snore, instead he talked in his sleep which Brian thought was both hilarious as well as annoying. The fact that the skinny man denied talking in his sleep made it all just as funny. Nick was the one that was often up in the middle of the night, often to use the bathroom, watch a cartoon when he couldnīt sleep or making those endless coughing sounds that had become a trademark for him. The teen was also well known for his nightmares and there were more than one occassion when Brian had been woke up from Nick whimpering in his sleep. Kevin was the only one that didnīt make any sounds in the night mostly since he was such a heavy sleeper that the guys used to joke that an earthquake couldnīt even wake him up.
This night was not different from any other nights that they had spent on the bus and Brian had tossed and turned for what seemed like forever. The movie had been pretty scary and heīd been actually happy when Nick had gone to bed early, since the teen had so easily got nightmares and those whimpering dreams often lead to one thing; more noises! His eyelids were becoming more and more heavy and soon he found himself on the verge of stepping over to dreamland when a sound suddenly woke him up, catching his attention.
The bed above him creaked heavily and Brian’s first thought was that Nick was dreaming when he saw two bare feet hang down and his friend jumped down from his bed. He was about to ask what was the matter when he saw his friend disappear towards the small toilet, closing the door fast behind him. Relieved to see that it was just another of those nightly visits he closed his eyes again and rolled to his side.
Tucking his blanket up to his chin he started to drift off to sleep when there when a noise caught his attention. It was a groan like someone was in pain. "Nick?"
No response came from the small toilet. He sat up straighter in bed, "Frack?" Another groan but still no response. His first thought was that he had imagined it all but when there were a soft moan he knew that he heard the right thing. There was a small whimpering too and this had Brian feeling concerned. Was Nick sick?
Setting his feet down he winced as his skin made contact with the cold floor. It was a bit chilly in the room and he padded over to he toilet, knocking softly, "Nick are you allright?"
"Mmmmm.." came a shakily reply.
Brian reached for the handle. Rattling the door he asked, "You want me to come in? You need anything?"
"Noooo..Iīm..Iīm bu..busyyyy.." A loud groan was heard when he uttered the last syllabels.
This had Brian pushing with his shoulder against the door, "Let me in...Open the door."
"Iīm..Iīm..fi..fine.." The tone was nothing but steady which had Brian getting almost desperate. Nick could be such a drama queen but he could tell that there was some genuine pain in the way his voice was shaking too.
"Open up!"
"Shhhh..yeah in a sec.." Nick mumbled and Brian could hear the toilet flush. He was about to let it all go when there was a moan from the other side.
"Thatīs it!!! Iīm coming in." Brian shook the door so hard that he feared that it would break. But all it did was stir up the guys in the bunks.
A noise was heard from the top bunk not far away from the toilet and soon AJīs voice boomed, "What the hell is going on?" He sounded very groggy and for an instant Brian debated wheater or not he should tell the truth. That Nick was in some kind of discomfort and that he refused to open the door. Then he decided against it since all it would do was getting the guys up and right now he wanted to talk to Nick in private.
"Itīs nothing," he called back. AJ grunted something and then rolled on his side, his back to them and soon he was back in the land of dreams. As soon as Brian could hear the even breaths he turned his attention toward Nick again.
The door opened, revealing a pale and shaky figure. Instantly Brian grabbed at him, "Are you allright? Dude you look like shit."
Shrugging out of his embrace Nick muttered, "Calm down..Iīm fine..just a bit of a stomachache..thatīs all." With a grunt he walked into the kitchen area, a bit hunched over since his stomach hurt too much to walk straight.
"Oh," Brian frowned, "You didnīt puke or something did you?"
Nick shook his head negative, letting out a small burp, "No, sorry." He held his hand towards his mouth momentarily which had Brian getting into a doctors mode.
"You want me to ask Walter to stop at the next reststop?" He felt sorry for his friend since he knew that traveling with a stomachache was not nice at all, especially when you wanted to use the facilities. "You feel sick?"
"No and yes, a bit."
"Huh?" Brian wasnīt following his friend’s drift. "What do you mean?"
Nick sighed. "No he doesnīt need to stop and yes to feeling a bit sick." He suddenly changed his tone, "But Iīm feeling a bit better now." He opened the cupboard and took down a glass, "Just need to drink some water and Iīll be fine. Iīm dying of thirst."
"You sure?" There was serious doubt in Brian’s voice as he uttered the words. "Maybe you should take something else for your stomach, you know some Gatorade or Pepto or something." He looked over at Nick with a frown, "Or should I wake Kevin?"
"NO!" Nick shook his head too fast for Brian not to be suspecious and then quickly added, "I mean itīs nothing serious you know. Maybe itīs something I ate that didnīt agree with me." He smiled paley, "Whatever it was the cramps are going away..seee.." He took his hands from his stomach and tried to stand up straight without wincing.
Brian was far from believing what Nick said, "Mhmmm.." he mumbled while he was desperately trying to think what was wrong with this picture beside Nick being sick again which was a big surprise....NOT! Suddenly he knew it, as far as he knew the teen hadnīt eaten anything at all that evening, even passed on pizza. He was about to call the bluff when he noticed that Nick downed three glasses of water in a row. "Thirsty much?"
The teen nodded as he wiped his mouth with his sleeve, "Yup."
"Ok," With a yawn Brian stretched his body, " You sure that I shouldnīt ask Walter to stop for a moment? You know so you can stretch your legs...get some fresh air or something?"
Nick shook his head again, "Nah Iīll be fine." He put the glass in the sink and then burped loudly, "As a matter of fact I think Iīm going to turn in, Iīm really tired and that stomachache is better now. Maybe it was just gas or something."
For a moment he blushed and Brian couldnīt help to smile at his friend. Laying his arm around the teen’s shoulder he said, "Yeah that could be it. Well if you feel better then maybe we should hit the sack."
"OK." With that they both walked towards the bunks. Brian watched as Nick crawled up to the topbunks. "You know if you wanna sleep down here, I can trade places with you." He pointed at his own bunk.
His friend shook his head, "No it’s ok..besides, why would Ė?"
Briand fidgeted momentarily, "You know if you feel like you wanna get sick or something."
"I donīt," Nick mumbled as he swung his legs up to the topbunk, "Relax," he smiled paley, "Everything’s gonna be fine, you know. Nothing to worry about." With that he lay down on his pillow, "I feel so much better now so stop being such a worrywart."
"OK, if you say so," Brian added patting his friend’s head, "Well sleep tight then and donīt hestitate to wake me if you start to feel sick again."
"Sure." Nick closed his eyes like to say that it was enough for now, "Night Frick."
"G'Night, Frack." Brian smiled before crawling back to his bed again. Even long after the noises had died down and he could hear the even breaths from all of his friends, Nick included, that indicated that they were all sleeping he couldnīt rest. He just knew that something was up with Nick, but no matter how he tried he couldnīt pinpoint to what it was. The over excessive water drinking had something to do with it, but why and what he had no clue. Closing his eyes he tried to will himself to sleep and when the dawn finally came and the sun was shining through the curtains he could relax well enough to finally let sleep take over. A disturbing and fitful sleep.
His mouth was all dry and it felt like he had swallowed a whole desert. Opening his eyes Nick felt like someone had poured a ton of sand into his eyes too and for a moment he thought that he had been trapped in a sandstorm. When he finally started to come to his senses he noticed that he was laying in his bed and it was late morning. The sounds of the others being up dawned upon him and his first instinct was to call out to them when he heard Brian’s voice discuss about his nightly visit to the bathroom. A bit pissed that he was topic of conversation and that they actually discussed if he was hiding something from them, he started to pout.
While he lay in bed he debated whether or not he should let them know that he was awake and then decided against it since his head hurt like a bitch. If he didnīt know if it was better he would have thought that he had been out clubbing and was suffering from a major hangover. At least that was what it felt like, the headache, nausea but especially the thirst.
Moistening his lips with some saliva, he glanced at his watch. The digitals told him that it was soon noon. 11:06. "Fuck," he whispered. They had really let him sleep in late. If he was lucky they would soon be in Milan. Moving in his bed he could feel that the backpain that had tortured him all evening was back again even more and the previous nights stomach trouble had been reduced to a dull pain by now. 'Iīm starting to fall apart,' he thought miserably as he drew his sheets up toward his chin. It was a bit chilly in the bus and if it wasnīt for the bladder making itself known he would have stayed in the bunk all day.
Suddenly someone came into the bunk area and listened intently. It was AJ, searching for something. "You up Kaos?" his friend called out softly while he was rumaging through some bags.
Nick held his breath, trying hard to make himself not known when the curtains were pulled back and he was peering into a pair of concerned brown eyes, "You allright dude?"
"Mmmm.." There was no need in trying to act like he was fast asleep anymore since AJ had found out his "secret". Silently he cussed that the skinny man seemed to have some sixth sense built in into him that whenever something was not right with one of the guys he always felt it. Apparently that sixth sense had kicked in now and therefore he knew that Nick was up and about too. "Iīm coming down soon, just stretching for a bit."
"Cool," His friend turned back to rumaging through the bags again, "B'rok said that you had some kind of stomach ache or something last night...youīre better now?"
Tattletale! Nick sighed loudly. Why couldnīt Brian mind his own business? "Yeah..sure..maybe it was the pizza or.." He could have bit his lip or slapped himself in the head. Why did he have to say those words since he knew that he hadnīt been anywhere near that pizza at all. He prayed silently that AJ wouldnīt noticed that slip up but fate didnīt seem to be on his side this morning and soon enough his friend picked it all up.
"Pizza?" there was surprise in the older man’s voice, "Dude you didnīt even touch that stuff!!!"
Damn. "Whatever." He hoped, no he prayed that AJ wouldnīt call upon his words but he couldnīt be more wrong since soon the brown eyes were peering upon him again.
"Youīre not getting really sick are you?" The eyes were searching at his and he had to look away momentarily.
"Nooo."
"Good," AJ stared at him, " Because if you are..and youīre lying Iīm going to kick your ass so hard your nose will bleed." With that he turned back to the search again, " Fuck did you see my cd player?"
Nick let out a sigh of relief when his friend turned his attention in another direction. "No, I havenīt..sorry." He thought for a while, "Maybe D' borrowed it yesterday." Being helpful would always help his friend’s foul morning mood.
AJ shook his head, "No I asked him but he said that he didnīt use it. You sure you didnīt borrow it?"
Nick shook his head. Sitting up straighter in his bed he was doing his best not to wince since the pain in his head and back was pretty bad and he needed some asprin or he was sure he was going to grow a third head. "No I didnīt use it."
"Ok." There was a deep sigh. He could hear the bunk curtains close and AJ leave the area, "Iīm going to tell the others that youīre up." With that the older boy was gone.
Nick sighed too. Why couldnīt they mind their own business?
The headache was making itself known again and for a moment he feared that his head would explode and his brain would splatter all over the place. Groaning he knew that he had to get some meds into his system before he died of an annerysm or something like that. With a moan he jumped down from his bunk, causing an electric jolt of pain once his feet connected to the bus floor. Another shot of pain made him wince when his back felt like it would split in half. He had no idea why it was hurting so much but somewhere in the back of his mind a thought crossed that it could have something to do with him peeing red again. Hadnīt the doctor told him that if he was showing signs of urinating blood he should immediately go to a hospital?
His disturbing thoughts were instantly pushed back when he came to face Kevin one on one.
"Hey Kiddo," the older man said with searching eyes, "Youīre finally up?"
"Uh-huh.."
The older man didnīt spare on his words, "Bri said that you were feeling rotten. I hope that youīre doing better today since we have a busy schedule ahead of us."
"Mmmm," Nick nodded, not finding any words to say. Running his hands through his tousled hair he mumbled "Iīm going to go in there," and then gestured towards the small bathroom again. God he seemed to be spending so much time in those facilities lately and he feared for having to take another trip in there again since any attempt to take a leak ended in pain and whimpering. For some strange reason he was drinking so much water yet he couldnīt pee so much and when he mangage to squeeze out a few drops it would be a session wrapped up in a cloud of pain. That was NOT something he was looking forward to enduring again.
"Ok, make yourself ready and then come over to the living room area since weīre having a brief meeting." Kevin stopped to look at him for a moment, "You sure that youīre allright?" His hand was reaching for the blonde’s forehead like he wanted to check that he was really feeling fine.
Nick shrugged away from the older man’s touch, fearing that he was running a low grade temp again. According to his book there was no need in showing this so therefore he backed off. "Yeah I told you I was ok, didnīt I?" There was a hint of accusation in his tone that had Kevin drop the subject.
"Ok.." he dragged out the word, "Just wanted to make sure."
"Good," With that Nick hurried towards the bathroom, "Now if you don’t mind me Kev Iīm going inside." Before the older man had a chance to object he shut the door, hard, to state his point. Once he had taken care of his business, another session in deep pain and pink tinged outcome, he fought the tears that were dwelling up in his eyes. His whole life sucked and he longed so much to be at home. Home with his family, his mom where he could get the comfort and hugs that he so desperately needed. Sinking down on the closed toilet seat he felt nothing but miserable and the tears fell without further delay.
Several minutes later he came to his mind again. Wiping his tears off with the back of his hand he tried desperately to get his bearings. Snot was running from his nose and looking at himself into the mirror he was in for a real treat! The face staring back at him was red and blotchy and he noticed to his dispair that he was looking bloated too.
"You look like hell Carter," he mumbled, splashing some water onto his face. Trying to look as normal as could be. When that didnīt succeed he stuck his toungue out to himself. These conversations to himself were starting to get the better of him. "Man you look fat too. And pathetic!" Taking off his tee he noticed that there was a bloated look that he could swear hadnīt been there before and he felt disgusted and sick. Pinching the fat on his stomach he felt nausea dwell up inside of him.
The voice of Mr Pearlman came into his mind, "You're fat and useless Carter. A big failure! No one likes someone that looks like you!” The words had hurt so much and he felt like he would explode from the emotions taht were bottled up inside of him.
No matter how hard he had been dieting lately he still looked nothing but a big fat blob! One big failure!!!
Oh how he wished that he could get his hands on those pills or that "health drink" that the obese manager had given to him. Even if he knew that it was bad deep inside he thought that Lou had been right and that he had done it all out of concern for his own health. Hadnīt he start to go down as soon as he stopped taking those pills and drinking that drink? Ok it had been nothing but disgusted to have an upset stomach all the time, but thinking of it he came to his decision that it sucked even more to look like a bloated whale!
That was making him even sicker.
Wiping his tears away he decided that he had to do something to the situation since he couldnīt go around bawling like a small kid all the time. He had to talk to Lou and get him to give him some more pills or that disgusting fluid. The manager had been right all along. He had to be on a diet. For his own sake. With that in mind he did his best to look normal again, dried his face with a towel and then placed a smile on his lips and then went out to meet the world again. Being happy as always.
