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Looking at his surroundings in the private hospital room, Nick shook his head. The nauseated feeling in the pit of his stomach was surfacing again, but it was mainly because of the smells of the hospital itself and not the cancer that was making him feel sick.

Aaron picked up on his brother’s frown. “Something wrong Nick?”

“Nah.....just nervous I guess.”

“Do you want me to get a nurse?”

“No thanks Howie, I’ll be fine.” Smoothing the blankets over his chest Nick tried to think of something to say to lighten the uncomfortable mood that was obvious in the room. “I can’t believe the people that were on the front lawn at the hospital this morning.”

“I kinda figured that would happen since you talked on the radio this morning and told them you were having surgery.”

“Yeah......”

“Hello Nick.”

“Hi Gayle.”

“Wow you know her?” Aaron asked as he watched the nurse breeze into the room.

Sighing, Nick nodded. “Unfortunately, yeah.”

The nurse laid the IV bags, tubing and syringes on the bed table and gave Nick a mock glare. “Unfortunately? Hey, I’m not that bad am I?”

“Nah, I was just implying that I’ve been here too much, you know?”

“I’m an IV specialist, so needless to say, Nick and I have become friends I suppose you could say, right Nick?”

“Yeah and you’re one of the better ones too,” Nick added with a slight smile.

Snapping on a pair of latex gloves, the nurse grinned. “Why thanks. Now let’s get at that port of yours and where the heck is that lab person? Hold on a sec, I’m gonna track them down before I start the IV, I’d like to save you a poke. Back in a few.”

Aaron watched the pony-tailed young nurse rush out of the room. “What was all that about?”

“They can draw the blood from the port under my collar bone. I have shit for veins now so they use that to get the blood for tests and stuff,” Nick explained quietly.

“Does that thing hurt?”

“The port? No, not really only when they have to flush it out. It hurts like a bitch sometimes. It’s more of a pain in the ass than anything.”

After a few moments, the IV nurse reappeared with the lab tech and did all the necessary steps to prepare Nick for surgery while Howie, Kevin, AJ and Aaron watched from the other side of the hospital room. Standing away in the corner, Aaron wrung his hands as he looked at his brother laying in the hospital bed.

Nick took his arm out from under his head and patted a spot on the bed. “AC, come here.”

Hesitantly, Aaron approached the bed.

“It’s okay, you won’t hurt anything,” Nick encouraged.

Shrugging his shoulders, Aaron cautiously sat on the edge of the bed.

“See, you didn’t hurt me.”

“Yeah, I’m more worried that someone is gonna come in here and yell at me for being on your bed. They did that to me once before when I went to see Andrew that one time.”

“Andrew?”

“Oh, I guess you don’t know him, he’s one of the roadies and he got hurt when one of the amps fell on his leg.”

“Owww, that would hurt,” AJ rasped.

“Tell me about it, I couldof sworn I heard the bone snap,” Aaron added.

Nick held a hand up, swallowing hard. “Um, that’s enough, I don’t want no more descriptions.”

AJ cocked a grin. “Oh yeah, I forgot, mister sensitive stomach over there.”

”Oh? Me? Let’s see, how about I talk about snot or puke with you and describe that....” Nick smiled.

”OKAY let’s call it a truce.”

As the laughter that filled the room slowly died down, and the smiles slowly faded from their faces. It was Kevin that finally broke the silence in the room when he looked at his watch.

“Nick, I was hoping your folks came last night---”

“I really don’t want them to come, you know? I mean, this is just some stupid surgery anyways and they’re busy with everything and stuff---”

“Nick, don’t say that!” Aaron piped up.

“Well it’s true, I don’t wanna make people have to drop everything to be here for this.”

“Nick, you’re not talking about having something like getting a hangnail removed. God, we’re talking about cancer on your liver, more importantly a tumor,” Howie softly corrected. “It’s their right to be here, you’re their son.”

Smoothing the wrinkles from his blankets, Nick kept his head down. “But I feel so stupid about this.”

“It’s nothing you could control Nick,” Kevin argued.

“Yeah, I think it was...”

“How do you figure?”

Nick locked eyes for a moment with AJ before quickly focusing his attention back to smoothing the blankets on his bed. “Cause I kept ignoring all the warning signs of this and I never got it checked out.”

“Nicky, everyone always wishes they could turn back time, but unfortunately, that doesn’t happen. You just play the hand you’re dealt and do everything you can to change the outcome, which is what you’re doing with this surgery and getting the chemo treatments,” Howie encouraged.

“And you promised all of us you’re gonna do that too,” Aaron softly added.

As tall Hispanic man dressed in maroon scrubs and wearing a surgical bonnet entered the room with a stretcher, Aaron quickly slid from Nick’s bed. “Hi, Nickolas Carter? I’m David from transportation. It’s time to take you down to holding.”

“Sounds like prison,” AJ quipped quietly.

“It is, trust me,” Nick mumbled.

“Aww, come on it’s not that bad, is it?” David asked as he turned the blanket down on the cart.

“Can they come down with me?”

“Yeah they can follow us,” David stated as he pushed the cart over to the side of Nick’s bed where the IV pole was situated. Reaching down, he pressed the button raiseing Nick’s bed to the same level as the cart. “Okay, can you scooch your butt over to this?”

Nick slowly obeyed David’s request, and the orderly quickly covered his patient up with a thick blanket, tucking his feet in.

“You want me to raise your head up or are you comfortable laying flat?”

“Can you put it up a little? It kinda hurts laying flat like this,” Nick requested quietly.

“Sure thing, you’re the boss,” David said as he gently pushed the head of the cart into a more comfortable position.

“Can one of you guys grab my ball cap? I don’t wanna go out there without something hiding my head.”

Silently, they followed the cart as it was pushed down the hall and onto the elevator and finally down the halls toward the surgical holding area, all trying to ignore the stares and shocked looks on the faces of people that passed by.

David stopped the cart outside of the heavy double doors that led to the holding area. “Sorry, but it’s restricted to only one person per adult patient, but I can make an exception and let two of you come in.”

“Kev, you go in with AC, me and Howie will be down in that waiting room,” AJ offered.

“Okay, I’ll be back in a few minutes so you can go in.”

Tucking his hands into his front pockets, AJ trudged toward the private waiting room that the orderly had shown them with Howie in tow. Upon entering the small room, AJ sank down into a chair, fingering the collar on his tee shirt. “God, these places make me edgy,” he muttered.

“Yeah, I hear you on that one,” Howie agreed. “PUT THAT AWAY, YOU CAN’T USE THOSE IN HERE!”

“I wanna find out see where the Carter’s are,” AJ growled as he flipped his cell phone open.

Howie grabbed at AJ’s hand, closing the cell phone. “You can’t use them in here, those are the rules, put the damn thing away!”

“Then how do you expect me to call them?”

“Payphone?”

“Oh christ, I ain’t using no goddamned public phone!”

“God, I can hear you two arguing when I was walking down the hall!”

“Brian? What are you doing here?” AJ questioned when his brother entered the waiting room. “Aren’t you suppose to be home with Leighanne?”

“Lee told me to come here, she knows I needed to be here for Nick,” Brian explained. “He hasn’t gone into surgery yet has he?”

“Not as far as I know. Aaron and Kevin are in the holding room with Nick right now. You can go in there when one of them comes out,” Howie stated.

“How’s he doing?”

Howie smiled slightly, “He’s okay, a little nervous, but that’s understandable.”

Brian nodded in agreement.

“How’s Leighanne?”

Brian grinned. “Bored to tears and as big as a house. That strict bedrest is really getting to her.”

“Sounds like fun to me,” AJ cackled.

“Bri? What the hell are you doing here?”

“Nice to see you too Kevin,” Brian grinned as he hugged his cousin. “Can I go see Nick?”

“Yeah, you better hurry though, I think they’re getting ready to take him in.”

Kevin escorted his cousin to the holding room, adding, “He’s gonna be surprised to see you,” before he turned to walk back to the waiting room.

Memories of his own surgery swam through his brain as he walked into the holding room. He found Aaron standing next to the cart, holding his brother’s hand while he spoke quietly with him.

“Hey buddy,” Brian said as he approached.

Nick jerked. “Bri, what the hell are you doing here?”

“Man, that’s the third person that’s said that to me in less than twenty minutes, I’m gonna get a complex if this keeps up,” Brian smiled as he gave Nick a brotherly kiss on his cheek and ruffled Aaron’s blonde hair.

“It’s okay, I just didn’t want to have people come and fuss over this....”

”Nick...” Aaron softly admonished.

Running a hand over his face, Nick sighed. “I know, sorry.”

“Am I missing something here?”

“Nah, just something that we talked about earlier, nothing to worry about. So how’s Leighanne?”

Before Brian could answer, a doctor approached them wearing green scrubs and a scrub cap. “Hi Nick, I’m Doctor Harrison. I’ll be performing the surgery.”

Nick smiled nervously in reply.

“I’m going to explain what’s going to be going on in surgery.”

Brian and Aaron stood quietly next to Nick while the doctor leaned against the steel bed rail. “I’ll be making an incision here,” he pointed at his stomach and traced a line. “I will be excising the tumor and the lymph nodes surrounding the liver. Once I’m satisfied with that, I will be implanting a pump inside your body that will deliver chemo directly into the liver....”

“A what?” Nick gasped. Brian rubbed his friend’s shoulder when he felt Nick’s body tense.

“An implantable pump, didn’t Dr. Andersen explain this to you?”

“Um, s-she only said higher doses of chemo, not this thing you’re talking about.”

“It’s the best way of fighting cancer in the liver son, it gives you better odds.”

“Will it make him sick?” Brian questioned.

“I’m sorry to say, yes, it will make him sick, but that’s what happens with chemo.”

“S-so, when would that chemo start and why can’t you do it with the port?”

“It’s the best way to fight the liver with the chemo being delivered directly into the liver and the implanted pump is the best way to increase your odds of survival of this type of secondary cancer. The chemo starts right after it’s implanted, before I close you up.”

“Oh, god, I don’t know if I want this,” Nick moaned.

“Nick, please, you promised me,” Aaron cried.

“Nick, you gotta do this....please don’t give up,” Brian coached.

Wiping the tears from his cheeks, Nick sighed again. “I guess I don’t have any other choice.”

“How long will the surgery take?” Brian questioned.

“Roughly four, maybe five hours, it depends on what I find when I get in there.”

“How long will he be in the hospital?” Aaron asked.

“Usually seven days, could be more or it could be less, it all depends on the patient. I should let you know too, that when you wake up, there will be a central line placed in your thigh.”

Nick narrowed his eyes at the surgeon. “A central what?”

“A central line that will be inserted into the main artery in your leg. Because of the internal chemotherapy that will be instituted and the risks of malnourishment from being ill, we will be feeding your nutrients intraveneously until you’re able to manage on your own.”

“God,” Nick whispered, swallowing hard.

“I’ll help you get through this Nick, just remember, you promised me you would fight this,” Aaron tearily reminded.

“Any questions?” Satified there weren’t any questions, the doctor smiled and patted Nick’s shoulder. “I’ll see you in a few minutes son.”

Brian quietly slipped an arm around Nick’s shoulder, hugging his brother tenderly. “I love you Nick.”

“I love you too.” Wiping the tears from his eyes, he could hear Aaron quietly sobbing. “Hey Airhead, I love you too. Go and kick AJ’s butt for me while I’m off having fun, okay?” He reached out and ruffled his brother’s head.

Folding his arms across his chest under the warming blankets as he was being wheeled into surgery, Nick could feel his heart pounding. He wished this whole ordeal was over.

“Hello Nicklas!”

Turning his head toward the familiar voice, Nick was shocked to see Dr. Andersen standing in the room, wearing a surgical gown and mask.

“Dr. Andersen? Hi.”

Placing an ungloved hand on her young patient’s shoulder, Dr. Andersen rubbed it lightly. “I’m going to observe. You’re in great hands with Dr. Harrison, he’s tops in this field. I’ll talk to you after surgery.”

“Okay Nick, slide on to this table,” a woman gestured at the wanted object.

Once Nick was on the table, several people starting taking their positions around him, each doing preparations for the procedure. A man wearing wire framed glasses leaned over Nick’s head.

“I’m Dr. Everett. You’re gonna feel a slight burn in your port, coolness in your chest and then you’ll get sleepy, are you ready?”

Nick nodded his head slightly in reply. True to the doctor’s words, he felt a slight burning and then a coolness into his chest as the anesthsia entered his system. The one thing the doctor failed to mention to him was the awful taste that entered his mouth. As he started to open his mouth to comment on it, he suddenly slipped into unconsciousness from the medication.