If his head ached it was nothing compared to what his chest felt like. It burned like fire, especially when he coughed, making it hard to breathe. Through his foggy mind he knew he had contracted yet another cold which wasnīt exactly unheard of even if he feared it might be the flu instead judging by how bad he felt. Heīd managed to sleep on and off, even if it hadnīt been a very nice sleep. Instead it was filled with strange dreams, waking up every so often either shivering like he was stuck in the Antarctic or sweltering wanting to shed his own skin. It wasnīt comfortable at all.
He also knew he had to be running a pretty high fever since that dream when he was stuck in an elevator kept coming back to him. Heīd dreamt that he was with his family, friends and the guys as well, everyone that meant something to him and they were all going up to the top level in a very very high building. The wierd thing was that he was like separated from them and couldnīt talk to them which was bad since he was the only one noticing that something was wrong with the system and if they didn’t get off they were all going to crash, killing them all in the process. Heīd tried desperately to make himself heard but the elevator started to drop down and then in a high speed went through the floors. People were screaming and he was doing what he could to help them but he couldnīt reach the stick that stopped it all. Helplessly he watched and felt how they were all going down and then it all became one big blur. He always woke up seconds before they were about to crash, usually drenched in cold sweat, with a bad headache and sick to his stomach.
The guys had all gotten use to this dream and this was the utter verification that he was sick for real. Kevin who was fasinated with alternative methods wanted him to go to a dream specialist since this could be something he had experienced in an earlier life. Brian had called it mumbo jumbo and Nick had just laughed. The dream was scary but he had become custom to it over the years.
Groaning, Nick shifted in bed. He felt so uncomfortable that he felt like crying out of despair. If he only had the energy.
"Heīs coming around," a female voice said and instantly Nick felt someone touching his forehead, with freezing hands. He wanted to yell to whoever was tresspassing into his life to back off, but found that he didnīt even have the energy to open his mouth, much less talk. Instead he moaned, thrashing with his head to get away from the offending object.
"His fever is still dangerously high," the nurse decided, "we need to cool it down even further or he’ll risk getting a convulsion or seizure." Turning to the younger nurse she directed, "He needs another saline bag." Wasting no time the younger of the two quickly started to run another bag while the older one wet a wash cloth and placed on his forehead. "There you go," she said to Nick who could do nothing but grunt in response.
Suddenly he felt so hot that he was sure that his brain would fry if he didnīt get anything to cool it down. Not a thought that he had made sense and there was a weird tingling sensation in his body. In other words it felt like he was in hell, or as he imagined it would be.
"How much is his temp now?" the older nurse asked as he heard a beep inside his brain that sounded like an echo. The younger nurse picked out the earthermometer reading, "Itīs 103.8."
"Not good, we need to get it down even more..and fast." Nick felt something cold over his body and he wanted to yell to them to leave him alone. It was a cooling blanket.
Just when he thought he would freeze off all off his limbs there was a weird sensation taking over his body. His head felt fixing to explode and a tinging feeling rinsed all over him. He wanted it to stop, wanted to yell to them how bad he felt when he suddenly started to shake and it was scaring him.
"Shit he’s seizing!"
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"This coffee sure tastes like crap," AJ muttered as he poured several sugar bags into the black substance. He moved painfully, "and it gives me a gut ache too."
"Then donīt drink it," Howie advised and instead motioned towards his own cup, "You should drink more healthier and you would feel better. Like this." "No thanks," AJ shook his head, scrunching his nose. "I donīt feel like drinking some freaking sea weed and then spend the rest of the day with apple splatter."
"JAY," Kevin nearly spat out his sandwich in disgust, "that was uncalled for."
Opening his mouth to object, AJ stopped his moves and instead shrugged his shoulders, "Whatever." Leaning back in his seat he glanced around the hospital cafeteria. It was pretty busy being breakfast time and he noticed that several people watched the four men at the table and whispered things to each other. It was clear that getting a visit from the Backstreet Boys wasnīt on the daily agenda. Strangely no one came up to bother them and to this they were both happy as well as surprised. Pulling his glasses down a little he noticed a beautiful nurse and instantly he flirted with a grin. He got a flashíng smile back when Brian, who was sitting and thinking if he should stay or leave, kicked him on the leg.
"What?" AJ snapped.
One word was said, "Sarah".
"So? Are you my fucking mother or what?" There was tension at the table and neither of the mens mood were on top. This was due to sleeping poorly but also because there was a worrying lack of information coming from Nick’s doctors.
"Whatīs the matter with you today?" Kevin muttered as he took another bite of his sandwhich.
Howie, wanting to avoid an impending conflict sighed, "I think weīre all tired and a little bit off. And its no wonder due to what weīre going through."
Kevin looked up, "Could be, but no one besides J is biting heads off." He paused, "Look at Brian," a short nod towards his cousin, "he stays pretty calm even if he has alot of things on his mind and Bob is even trying to cope. But you.." he pointed with his sandwich at the younger man, "you act like a total ass!"
There was a tight tension, everybody waiting for the rebel to snap something back but instead he sank even further down in the chair, like all the air had popped out off him, like a balloon. "Yeah..I guess youīre right. Sorry." He paused, rubbing his forehead, "Itīs just that I donīt do hospitals that well. Itīs something with this place that scares the hell out of me." "Yeah I know what you mean," Howie said with a sigh. "I think itīs this..itīs this whole situation that is eatinī us all up. Not knowing what will happen and not hearing anything either."
Brian who had been unusually quiet suddenly spoke up, "I think we should get movinī. Weīve been away way too long." He looked pale and his eyes that usually was a shimmer of happiness was dull and lifeless, filled with worry. This whole situation had aged their friend ten years.
Kevin who was very worried over how Brian was doing mentally, placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, "Relax," he said, "Íīm sure everything is fine and Bob is up there holding down the fort." Looking at the untouched sandwhich in front of his friend he continued, "You need to eat something so you donīt get sick!"
"I wonīt get sick," Brian mumbled where he sat looking down at the table, "itīs just that I have this really bad feeling.."
"Thatīs just because you donīt eat," Kevin stated calmly. Brian stared at his cousin, shaking his head. The older man was always so down to earth, trying to find plausible reasons to everything. Everytime someone was down or feeling a bit off Kevin had a habit of trying to force some food down that persons throat like it would solve all problems. Usually it did, but this time it was more complicated.
"I think B is right, we gotta get going," AJ said suddenly, standing up, "plus I need a smoke."
Sighing Kevin pushed his sandwhich aside, "I guess your right, I dont have any appetite anyways." Looking over at Howie who silently sipped on his tea he asked, "You done D?" A short yes was returned and with that the four men walked over to the elevators, getting everybodys eyes on them.
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"Aaron let me speak to mom..yes..no..she is what? Well tell her that I wanna talk to her..yes..yes now." Bob sounded frustrated. After practically no sleeping, pondering what a bad parent he was who handīt been for his kid but had gone back to LA to attend some promotion party, he decided that he had to get Jane to come down to Florida. She was still very upset over how the last visit had ended that she went back to LA and it didnīt help that Jane was a person who had a hard time forgiving. But he felt the need to tell her about the situation especially since the doctor had made it very specific that all of his family should know about his condition.
"Aaron I told you to get your mother, didnīt I?" He was starting to feel frustration taking over as he tried to get his teenage son to co-operate. It was like Aaron sensed something was wrong and with tears in his voice he desperately wanted to know how Nick was doing. And to that Bob didnīt know what to say. "She canīt come?..and why is that?..Noo?" Bob frowned, "Are you saying that she is busy with some guests and canīt come even when itīs about her own son....yes Nick!" Now he felt really frustrated and he could hear Aaron sobbing which had him feeling even worse.
"No squirt," he talked in as soft voice as he could muster while feeling the frustration boil up inside him. "There is nothing to be worried about, I just wanna talk to Jane thatīs all. NOOOO..nothing has happened," he lied, mentally kicking himself for not telling the truth. It was just that he couldnīt for his life tell his youngest son that the one that he cared about the most was in a very critical condition. And what good would that do Aaron across the other side of the continent? "Ok well I see..Aaron tell mom to call me as soon as she can..yes..no I wonīt and yes I will say hi to Nick for you..ok..and..donīt forget to tell mom to call me then, ok?. Yes and son..I love you too."
With that he hung up still unfinished business to take care of.
Dammit why did Jane have to be so stubborn? Why did she pretend that everything was just fine when their oldest son was sick with cancer? With a sigh he walked up to the information desk asking the nurse in charge, "Any news about my son? Nickolas Carter in room 26?" "No Iīm sorry," The nurse on the other side shook her head and he could swear that he saw a hint of sadness in her face. Shrugging the bad thoughts away he was about to go to the waiting room when it happend.
There were a call code for room 26!
"Heīs seizing!"
In slowmotion Bob watched as several nurses and a doctor rushed down the corridor down to room 26. Without hesitation Bob followed suit. Deliberately, he ignored the nurse from the information desk who was yelling to him to stop, "Sir..sir you canīt go in there. Only medical personnel are allowed." But Bob didnīt care. After all it was his son and if anyone should have the right to be there for Nick it should be him.
"Youīll only hinder the staff!"
Ignoring her desperate attemps to stop him he pushed the door open only to be met with a sight that he would later wish he could forget. There on the bed was his Nick attatched to several lines and monitors. He was deatly pale and next to him personnel tried to hold him down while his body convulsed violently. They were acting pretty fast and suddenly the doctor yelled out "Shit heīs going into v-tach."
This was all turning into a nightmare!
One nurse looked at a strip of paper coming out of a monitor and he could see that the lines were all jumpy and wavy. The whole situation in front off him was too surreal. He wanted to wake up from it all. Wanted it all to be a dream but nothing like that happend instead someone yelled, "Heīs bp is 153/122 ."
"Thatīs too high."
"Retavase 50 ml..STAT."
It all happend in a matter of seconds and suddenly someone spotted him and yelled, "Whatīs he doing here? Get him out of here!"
"Hurry weīre loosing him!" The personnel was working on him frantically.
" Nick..hold on..come on dammit..Nick stay with us!"
He wanted to scream. Wanted to yell to them that it was his son laying there yet he couldnīt say a thing. Only stare at the scene unfolding in front of him.
'God this canīt be happening.'
Someone jerked at his arm and he wanted to scream at them to leave him alone, turning around he noticed the nurse from the information desk as well as a male orderly. "Come on sir..let them do their job." the black man said placing an arm around his shoulder. Bob jerked the arm away, "NO.....let me go!" But the grip was firm, "No sir youīre not allowed to be here. Come on."
Defeated, he let the man lead him away. Away from his son that was fighting for his life. Tears were streaming down his face as he looked the man in his eyes, "Thatīs my son laying there...... Thatīs Nick."
