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2.46 am.

It was the time when the call came. The call that came to change their whole world. Their life.

Howie was the one that heard the shrill signal and he was the one that took the message. Afterwards he was standing there, all silent with the phone in his hand. It was all so surreal. This was the call they had all been dreading ever since they that were told that Nick had cancer.

Now he didn’t know if he should yell or cry. Life was so unfair.

“You okay D?” AJ called out from the door.

The Latino who was standing in a hunched over position looked as he didn't know what to say or what to do. It was as if all air had went out of him.

“D?” A gentle hand was placed on his shoulder. “What’s wrong?” Then AJ must have spotted the phone in his hand as he asked slowly as if he feared what the answer would be, “Who called?”

Not answering Howie turned to look at him, tears dwelling up in his eyes, the other man catching on instantly. “Oh shit, say it isn’t so!”

“It was the hospital...and...and..” The words were stuck inside his throat, choking him.

“And..and... what?” AJ urged. “What D? What happened???” Now he was shaking the Latino by his shoulders as if he was forcing the answers out of him. “Tell me!”

Howie, still silent looked down at the floor. He didn’t know how to spill it to the rest of the guys. Didn’t know how they would take the news that would rock their whole world. AJ must have caught on that whatever his friend was about to spill it was bad news since he shook with fear. “Did something happened to Nick?”

The older man breathed outloud as he mumbled to himself, “Yes you could say that.” He seemed to regain strength as he mumbled, “He's dead Jay. Nick's dead.” The words hurt so bad that he didn’t know how he could function. It was a pain so deep that it felt as if his whole body was being ripped apart, yet it was nothing compared to the scream that followed.

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!”

Howie woke up with a jerk. His bedspread all tangled around his feet and his body covered with sweat. Phew that had been some kind of nightmare he concluded as he drew his hands through his sweat soaked hair. As soon as his eyes had adjusted at the dark he looked around a bit disoriented in the room. Even if he’d stayed at Nick's place on and off for almost a year he never got used to the decorations. There on the wall was a lime green clock shaped as a lizard with glowing red eyes. It was a present Nick had received when they went to the Philipnes back in the days and he’d refused to throw it away even though Howie had repeatidly told him that it was tacky. And now he was paying the price of having to sleep in Nick's game room.

But what caught his sight was not the lizard. No it was the time.

2.46 am

Just as Howie took in the numbers a shrill signal interrupted his thoughts. Instantly he could feel his blood freeze to ice as he reached to pick up the phone. His heart was pounding so fast that he feared that he would have a heart attack. The dream was too much in head and this was getting much too spooky for his own liking.

Howard had never been all that into ghosts but he believed in unnatural things even if he prefered to keep them at a distance. He was an Catholic and whenever the opportunity rose he would go to Sunday mass. He’d also prayed for Nick almost every time, hoping that his little brother would recover from his illness and last night he’d went to church to do so. The call he was receiving had to be one of good news otherwise he wouldn't know what to do.

Putting the phone next to his ear he tried to steady his voice as he said, “Hello?”

The tone of a woman's voice came to focus and he immediatly recognized it as belonging to one of Nick's night nurses, Kathy.

“Mr. Dorough,” the woman said. “I’m sorry to have to call you in the middle of the night but Mr. Carter has become increasingly worse and we think it would be a good thing if you could come down to the hospital as soon as you can.”

The words struck him like needles.

“Is...is he dy...dying?” Suddenly Howie had a hard time talking, as if he was living his nightmare all over again.

The voice on the other side became silent and he felt as it was an eternity before the answer came, “All I can tell you Mr. Dorough that it would be best if you came by the hospital.” Those words did nothing to heal the ache the Latino felt in his heart. As in slow motion he heard himself saying, “Okay we’ll be there,” before he hung up.

Too shocked over the news that he’d recieved and that he’d been dreading ever since day one he just stood there, phone in his hand.

***************************************************************************

AJ had a restless night. He was a born night owl and getting to bed before 3 am was a rare thing to do. That came from the nights when they had been touring and done concerts and afterwards he’d been too wired to slow down. Then he’d went out partying, often until the morning and then slept until noon. This life had really screwed up his time schedule and it was the reason why he hadn’t went to bed although he knew that the rest of the guys was sleeping soundly in their rooms.

Suddenly he heard a noise coming from the room where Howie was sleeping. It sounded like a phone signal and instantly it got him on the edge. Recieving a phone call in the middle of the night was never a good sign and it had him all shaky, especially since Brian had told them after coming back from the hospital that Nick wasn’t doing so good and that he was running a fever again.

Turning off the TV he decided to see what was going on and then walked over to the Howie's room, only to his surprise see that it was open. The older man was a person that was very careful with letting anyone into his privacy and they used to tease him that he always had to close the door when he was getting dressed. Nick had stated that it was because his dick was too small to be looked at, but AJ knew that it wasn’t the case. This was back in the days when they spent far too much time together and when they were constantly getting on each other nerves. The fact that Howie had left the bedroom open this time more scared him than amused him.

“You okay D?” He called out to his friend who was standing in the middle of the floor, looking forlorn. The phone in his hand told AJ that someone had indeed called and whoever it was had gotten the latino upset. When there were no immediate response he walked up to his friend, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. “ D? What’s wrong?” He paused when things were staring to get more clearer, “Who called?”

When Howie finally turned around the sight scared him. His friend had tears in his eyes and at that moment AJ realized that it was true; a picture could say more than a thousand words. “ Oh shit! Tell me it isn’t so.”

Howie looked strangely at him, scared all of a sudden, why, AJ had no idea.

“This is like a deja vu,” the older man mumbled more to himself than to anyone else.

AJ frowned. Was Howie starting to go crazy?

As if his friend most have sensed that he was acting off he explained, “They called from the hospital and....” Not wanting to spare another minute the younger man cut him off.

“And...and..what?” He urged. Howie had a habit of being a slow talker, not as bad as Kevin but enough to make AJ feel annoyed. “What D? What happened?” He found himself shaking the Latino's shoulder as if he was getting the answers, that he didn’t want, faster. “Tell me!”

This action caused his friend to look even more scared than before and AJ didn’t know what to do. This was not the result he’d aimed for. “Did something happen to Nick?”

At that last question Howie put his hands up to his face, murmuring, “Oh God it’s happening all over again.”

Confused the younger man frowned. Why was Howie acting so strange? Even more strange than he usually did? Then another fear struck him. What if something really really bad had happened to their little brother? Something that they had all feared ever since the day they got the message about Nick's cancer? For a moment it felt as if the realization would strangle him and he forced out, “Nick...Nick isn’t dead, is he?”

Strangely Howie seemed to realx before he said awkwardly, “That was my line.”

Another frown. Now AJ was positive that something had turned around inside his friend's head but right now he didn’t have the time to find out what. “Howie...tell...me...” He was talking with slow syllabels as if that was the only thing Howie would understand in the state of shock he seemed to be in, “Did...something...happend...to...Nick?”

For the first time since he’d come into the room Howie seemed to finally grasp what was going on and to AJ’s surprise he said, “It was Nick's nurse. They called us to inform that he has gotten worse and they want us to come to the hospital as soon as possible.”

The words hit the younger man like a bucket of ice cold water and that moment AJ wished that everything was nothing but a nightmare....and that he would wake up soon again.