AJ had stopped and spun around when he'd heard Howie cry out. He looked back and caught a glimpse of his white shirt, then it was gone. "Howie?!" he yelled, wondering what just happened.
He saw Nick's blond hair, then he too disappeared from view along with what looked like Brian, his baby-blue sweater standing out in the dusky darkness. AJ froze as their fear filled screams echoed around him.
Kevin stopped dead in his tracks, the sound of Nick and Brian's yell filling his ears. He slowly turned around, seeing AJ standing frozen not far away. Kevin looked around him, searching for Nick, Howie, and Brian. They were nowhere to be seen. What the hell?
AJ was trying to figure out what had just happened. They were there, then they were gone. He looked behind him and saw Kevin with a perplexed expression on his face, obviously as lost as he was.
"What happened?" asked Kevin.
"I- I don't know," AJ replied, turning to where he had last seen his friends. "We gotta go check it out."
Kevin slowly nodded, still hearing the fear in his friends' voices as they echoed through his mind.
~/~/~/~/~()~~~~~
Nick gripped Brian's hand tightly, not wanting to lose him as they slid down the hill. Their pace was fast and out of control as they slid over rocks and small saplings, the loose earth cascading down with them. They felt each and every bump, knowing they'd soon have the bruises to prove it.
"Nick!" Brian cried, pointing ahead of them. Nick gasped as he saw the sillouette of a large tree dead ahead, becoming closer by the second. They knew the only solution to not slamming into the tree would be to release their gripped hands, to sever their only secure tie. They each prayed the other would be all right as they looked at each other one last time and then let go. They pushed away from each other and whipped by the large tree trunk on either side, barely missing it.
The push forced Nick onto his right side, he gritted his teeth as a sharp rock gouged at his side. Nick looked across from him and could see Brian. His breath caught. Brian was out of control, tumbling, rolling down. Nick forced himself to turn away and look below him. He saw the bottom rushing up to him, the falling dirt and debris already piling up around a still form. Howie!
Nick's feet hit the leveled off ground first, his momentum carrying him forward to slam to the hard forest floor. Ow... He closed his eyes and concentrated on breathing, the force of the hit having knocked the wind out of him. Finally retrieving his breath, he opened his eyes and looked around. There were mounds of dirt and debris all around him, he could hear and feel the dirt and pebbles still raining down on him and bouncing off the newly created piles. Nick forced himself off the ground and up to his knees, grunting at the dull pain in his side. He wrapped an arm around his stomach and looked for his friends, finding them lying still, only a couple yards from him. He struggled to his feet, favoring his side, and stumbled to them.
Nick dropped down beside Brian and Howie, both of them covered in dirt. Looking at Brian, Nick noticed his eyes were open.
"Brian? You okay?" he asked, hoping he'd answer.
Brian blinked and slowly turned his head to Nick, "I-I'm fine, Nick. I just don't really want to move for a couple minutes."
"You sure?" asked Nick, his voice tired sounding.
"Yeah, just give me a minute," Brian insisted, "How's Howie?"
"I don't know yet."
Nick turned to Howie's form, his eyes were closed but he was breathing. "Howie?... Hey, 'D!"
Nick bent over Howie and shook him slightly, trying to wake him up without hurting him in case he was injured. "Hey, c'mon Howie! Wake up!"
Howie groaned and brought a hand up to his face, rubbing his head. He opened his eyes to see a tired looking Nick with a smile on his face. Howie glanced around him, "W- wha' happened?"
"Uh, you kinda did a header down the hill," replied Nick, his smile turning cautious.
"Huh?" Howie looked confused, then his face brightened as the memory returned, "Oh, the landslide."
Now it was Nick's turn to look confused, "Landslide? Is that what that was?"
Howie sat up with a grimace and nodded, "Yeah, I didn't see it in the dark... It never woulda happened if we would of stopped for the night."
Nick looked closely at Howie, he seemed angry, "You all right?"
Howie thought for a moment, testing his arms and legs, "Yeah, I don't know how, but... yeah. I think I'm okay."
"Good," breathed Nick, leaning back on a dirt pile and closing his eyes, feeling the sleep he'd fought so hard beginning to take control.
Howie sat up straighter and studied Nick, "Nick, are 'you' okay?"
Nick half opened his eyes, "Yeah, just tired mainly."
"Mainly?" questioned Howie, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah, well... I kinda hurt my side on the way down," Nick said, nodding his head up the hill.
"Let me see," said Howie, moving closer to Nick and reaching out as Nick struggled back into an upright position, "Is it bad?"
"No," grimaced Nick, "Not too bad." He lifted his shirt from his right side and showed Howie. Howie looked relieved.
"It looks like ya jus' scraped it. It's not bleeding, but it'll probably be sore for a while," informed Howie, then asked, "How's your head? It still botherin' ya?"
Nick leaned back again and closed his eyes, "It's better. Nothin' like before, I don't feel sick anymore and I can focus. But... I still got the headache and I really want to go to sleep." Nick rubbed his head and yawned.
Howie nodded and patted Nick on the shoulder, "You rest then. I think why you're so tired is because your head is trying to get better and sleep can help it heal."
Nick felt sleep taking over, but managed to mumble, "Okay, ... check on Brian." Then Nick was asleep.
Howie's eyes widened in surprise at Nick's last words, "Brian?"
"Yes?"
Howie looked on the other side of Nick and saw Brian, laying on the ground and looking at him. Howie managed to stand and walk around Nick's sleeping form and to Brian's side.
"Now jus' what are you doin' here?" smiled Howie, kneeling.
Brian grinned and finally moved into a sitting position, "Well, I saw you and Nick having so much fun and decided, 'What the hell!' I might as well join y'all."
"Yeah," chuckled Howie, "It was quite a trip, huh?"
"Hell, yeah! They should get that ride at Disney World!"
Howie laughed, Brian joining him. Both were glad for the tension breaking, until Brian suddenly stopped with a wince, his hand gripping his left shoulder.
"Hey, you okay?" asked Howie, concerned.
"Yeah," grunted Brian, slowly rotating his shoulder, "I think I just banged my shoulder up some. I think I just strained it."
"You sure? There isn't anything else?"
"Nah, although I think my new colors are black and blue. I'm gonna be covered in bruises, each one catagorin' a bump on that hill."
Howie smiled, "You and me both, brother."
Brian's gaze traveled to Nick, "So how's Nick?"
Howie looked at the sleeping form, "I think he'll be all right. Got a bit banged up like us, a scrape on the side, and that concussion isn't out of his system yet. I think he'll be a lot better after a night's rest."
An angry scowl appeared on Brian's face, "What the hell was the deal with Kevin? We should of stopped, then none of this would of happened." Brian used his right hand to gesture around him.
Howie nodded, anger showing on his face, too. "I don't know, but you can bet that I'm going to ask him."
~/~/~/~/~()~~~~~
AJ and Kevin carefully walked back to where the others used to be, stopping before a large crater now residing where earth once rested. Their eyes widened as the possible occurrence to what happened to their friends registered.
AJ dropped to his knees, staring at the still loose ground and then down the steep hill. "Oh, God... Kevin, they- they were..." AJ let his hands fall heavily on his lap, causing an audible squeak. "What the..." AJ lifted his hand and stared at his pocket, watching as it moved and a small, furry head cautiously poked out, the big black eyes blinking sleepily up at him.
"Holy..." AJ had forgotten about the little squirrel that had taken up residence in his pocket, he wondered how he could possibly of forgotten that?
"Hey, little guy," said AJ, patting the squirrel on the head. "Forgot you were there," he continued sadly, gazing down the dark hill. The squirrel gazed at AJ questioningly, seeing the sadness and worry on his face. It jumped out and climbed onto AJ's shoulder, its dark eyes watching him.
AJ stood abruptly, turning to Kevin who was blankly staring at the crater and slowly shaking his head, "Kevin, we gotta go after them."
Kevin didn't reply or move, he just continued to stare.
AJ's brow creased, "Kevin?... Kev! ... Hello!" AJ waved a hand in front of Kevin's face, still getting no response.
Kevin stared at the hole, not believing what he was seeing. Oh, God... This is all my fault! If I hadn't of pushed them... If I would of stopped when Howie asked... It's all my fault! They could be hurt... maybe ... 'dead'? Kevin came back to reality with a snap. He stared in shock at AJ before him. AJ had just slapped Kevin full in the face.
"Hey! Sorry, bro'," said AJ, "But we gotta find the guys."
Nodding, Kevin replied, "Yeah, o-okay. Lets go... watch your footing. This hill is still pretty unstable."
Kevin decided to do what he could to find and save his friends, then he would apologize and never be like that again. The guilt he had right now was overwhelming. The guys would be better off without me. Just look at what I've caused...
With the squirrel still on his shoulder, AJ followed close beside Kevin as they carefully made their way down the hill to their friends, slipping and sliding the whole way.
~/~/~/~/~()~~~~~
Howie and Brian looked up as dirt and pebbles rained down on them suddenly. They could see AJ and Kevin slipping and sliding down the hill toward them.
Brian looked at Howie, "Well, looks like you're gonna get that chance for a talk, 'D."
"Brian! 'D!" yelled AJ, hurrying his last steps and ending up on his rear, sliding the final distance to his friends. Not missing a beat, he was up on his feet immediately and by his friends, who each had amused smiles.
"You guys okay?" asked AJ, frantically looking them up and down, he then saw Nick, "Nick? Is Nick okay?"
"AJ!" smiled Howie, "He's fine, just sleepin'. We're fine, too, just a bit banged up."
AJ sagged in relief, "Thank God! What the hell happened to you guys?"
"Well," started Howie, tossing Kevin an angry look, Kevin just looked away, "I walked right on top of a landslide, causing it to break loose, draggin' me and Brian and Nick down the hill. Ya see, I didn't see it 'cause it was too dark." Howie and Brian glared at Kevin.
AJ saw the glares at Kevin and came to his defense, "Hey! It's not Kevin's fault, how could he of known there were landslides around here."
Brian glared at AJ, "There ya go, he DIDN'T know. He had no way of knowing what the landscape was like, so we should of stopped for the night."
"But-" began AJ, but Kevin interrupted him.
"No, AJ. Brian and Howie are right. I should of stopped, it IS my fault." Kevin stared into Howie's and Brian's angry eyes, "This is all my fault, I shouldn't of pushed you guys. I'm sorry... it won't happen again. I can guarantee it."
Howie and Brian froze, then glanced at each other, perplexed. Kevin admitted to it being his fault, he apologized. But... they each heard something else in Kevin's voice; guilt and... defeat? They both suddenly felt bad. After all, they didn't exactly refuse Kevin's wanting to keep going. They were just as much to blame.
"Kevin..." began Brian, then stopped, not knowing what to say. Howie helped him out.
"Kevin, we don't mean to be mad. And it's not all your fault, we didn't insist on stopping. So, we are just as much to blame. Its nobody's one fault, we all participated. It was just something that happened, an accident." Howie said this as he realized it, knowing it is true.
"No."
The finality in Kevin's voice caused Brian, Howie, and AJ to pause. Brian stood.
"Yes, Kev. It wasn't your fault, believe me. It WASN'T your fault," even as Brian said this, he could see the denial in Kevin's eyes.
Kevin shook his head, "No. It IS my fault, but you don't have to worry anymore. I won't do anything. I promise."
He won't do anything? AJ stepped forward, "Kev-"
"No, AJ. That's all I'll say about it." Kevin looked at his friends, his gaze staying on Nick's sleeping form as he continued, "Do you think we should go to sleep for the night?"
This caused the others to pause again, Did Kevin just ASK them to do something? Howie slowly nodded his head, not knowing how to take this sudden change of character, "Yeah, I guess. Its been a long day."
Kevin nodded his head and then laid down. The others followed suit, wondering if this accident was effecting Kevin differently then the rest of them. After a few minutes of silence, there was a squeak and then a yell, causing everyone to jerk up, including Nick who blinked sleepily at his friends, noticing that Kevin and AJ were now with them.
"Ahhhh! What the-?!" Brian yelled, scrambling back as fast as his shoulder would let him. AJ burst out laughing. There, sitting on Brian's chest, was the squirrel. The look on Brian's face as he continued to scramble backwards even though the hill stopped him, caused AJ to fall back with tears streaming down his face. The squirrel, at hearing AJ, jumped off Brian and ran to him.
The others just looked extremely confused and looked questioningly at AJ, who was now somewhat under control and sitting back up. Brian looked at AJ who was petting the... squirrel, Brian's heart was racing after the rude wake up by the damn thing.
AJ finally spoke, the smile easily heard in his voice, "Sorry, Bri'. I guess Squeaker here wanted to make a new friend." AJ couldn't help it, he laughed again.
"Squeaker?" asked Brian, glaring at the laughing AJ, "It has a name?"
"Well, yeah," explained AJ, "Ya see, when I found the moose this squirrel found me. He hasn't left me alone since, he stayed in my pocket and I forgot he was there until a bit ago. He was on my shoulder as I came down the hill, but I kept slipping and he jumped off, choosing to travel by ground. I guess it seemed safer. Anyways, when I found you guys he wasn't around. So I thought he finally decided to leave," AJ smiled at the squirrel staring up at him, "Guess I was wrong."
"Well, obviously," said Brian, rolling his eyes. "You actually named it?"
AJ blushed, "Yeah, it squeaks a lot. Thought it suited him, and it doesn't seem like he's going to leave."
Nick watched and listened to the conversation, becoming more awake. He moved over by AJ and the squirrel, "You actually have a pet squirrel?" he asked, staring at the little gray animal.
AJ grinned, "Yep."
Nick grinned, his blue eyes lighting up, "Can I pet it?"
AJ chuckled, "Sure, I don't see why not."
Nick cautiously reached a hand out, the squirrel just sat there staring at him. Nick's hand touched Squeaker and the squirrel didn't do anything, so Nick petted it. Nick smiled and started to play with the animal, Squeaker squeaked and rolled onto his back, playfully kicking at Nick's hand as he tickled his tummy.
Nick laughed, "He's so cute!"
AJ smiled, happy that Nick was smiling and laughing again. It'd been a while since he'd seen the kid happy. Come to think of it, not since this whole deal started. AJ shrugged it off for now and joined Nick in teasing the squirrel, which would jump up and climb up their arms and sit on their shoulders or heads and then jump down again.
The others just shook their heads at their band mates, beginning to get settled again to go to sleep. After a couple of minutes of listening to AJ and Nick giggling, along with squeaks from the squirrel, they'd had enough.
"All right!" yelled Howie, exasperated, "That's enough with the squirrel, go to sleep!"
After mumbled 'fine's from a disappointed Nick and AJ, the group was quiet and soon asleep.
~/~/~/~/~()~~~~~
The old chair made a loud creak as the form using it leaned back, a satisfied smirk on her cold face. She looked at the monitors before her, her gaze switching from the now sleeping BSB, to the whereabouts of each of her hired men. Her ice blue eyes stayed on the image of Jake, who was on the hill just above the BSB. He was watching them closely. She idly wondered if he was getting a little too involved with this scheme. For some reason, Jake had developed an absolute hatred for the young Mr. Carter.
Shrugging her shoulders, she cast the thought aside. What did it matter anyways? She was going to kill them anyway. But... it did matter. She wanted them left alone until they reached the cabin. It was part of the game, Jake better understand that and leave the kid alone... unless he breaks the rules again, that is.
The rules. That reminds me...
She picked up the radio and tuned it to the right frequency, "Jake, you read?"
She watched the image of Jake jump at her sudden voice, she smiled.
Then he answered, "Yeah, boss?"
"I want you to set up the package."
"Now boss?" he whined. Jake was disappointed, he was waiting for one of the boys to break a rule so he could deliver the punishment.
He cringed at the answer, the woman's voice deadly, "Yes, NOW."
"All right, boss. I'm going."
She put the radio down and let her anger fume. Jake had better not forget who is in charge. Turning her angered eyes back to the image of the BSB, she smiled a sick smile. Atleast they were doing a remarkable performance so far, the landslide was bound to happen with traveling at night, but their angered reactions to each other was the icing on the cake. Oh, how she was enjoying this.
She then realized that she should take some time now to sleep, having not done that for the past day and a half. She walked to her bed in another room and laid down. Her demented mind went to sleep with the plans for the next day and the package.
///////Day3\\\
Nick squeezed his eyes and grimaced at the bright, early morning sunlight shining down on him. He opened his eyes a bit, squinting at the sun. Then with a frustrated groan he pushed himself up, leaning on his elbows in a half reclined position. As his eyes adjusted to the brightness he noticed the others have already woken up and were walking around, stretching and working the kinks out of their bodies after sleeping on the hard ground. Brian noticed he had finally woke up and walked over to him.
"Hey, Frack!" he smiled, "Ya finally get yer lazy butt up?"
Nick smiled, "Ha ha, Frick. Why didn't you jus' wake me up?"
"We didn't want to. You needed the rest, Nick." Brian explained, sitting beside Nick.
Nick nodded his head, knowing this was true and was glad they did. He felt pretty good. His headache was almost nonexistent and he felt refreshed, no longer having the feeling that he could fall asleep at the drop of a hat. His side was sore, but not too much of a distraction and his body did ache after the tumble down the hill. Nick looked at Brian.
"How do you feel after last night?" he asked.
Brian grinned, "Like someone stuck me in a washing machine and then a drier, just for good measure. You wouldn't believe how many bruises I have."
An image of Brian tumbling down the hill flashed through Nick's mind. "I think I could," he said sadly.
Brian looked at him, "Yeah, well, we should be going soon. We're just waiting for the say so from Kevin."
Brian, Nick, Howie, and AJ waited... And waited. Finally, Howie walked up to Kevin.
"Hey, Kev! Uhh... don't ya think we should be going?"
Kevin looked at him, "If you think we should. I don't know, don't ask me. Its up to you guys. Whatever you want to do." And with that Kevin turned away, leaving a perplexed Howie staring at his back.
What the hell was that? Kevin always makes the decisions. Not that we can't decide for ourselves, but... Kevin always knows the right thing to do before we do. He would always, like... initiate us to do something. What's the deal? Howie turned back to the others, shrugging his shoulders. "I guess we go now, then."
Brian, Nick, and AJ looked at each other. None of them liked the way Kevin was acting, but they all knew they needed to leave. So, Nick and Brian got up and AJ picked up Squeaker and put him on his shoulder. They all started to follow Howie, Kevin saw them leaving and soon joined them, walking at the end of the line.
Howie nervously looked behind him, seeing all of his friends following HIM. It didn't feel right, no, it wasn't right. Kevin should be up here, not me. Yeah, he made a mistake yesterday. It happens. We all need him to be the one in the lead, we need his leadership and guidance. Nothing else is right. But... Kevin seems to believe that he can't do it anymore, or he WON'T do it... How are we going to convince him that we need him to show us the way?
They didn't get far before they were interrupted by a crackling, then...
"Backstreet Boys!"
Kevin stopped and stared at his pocket, he reached in and took out the radio. He had forgotten all about it. His eyes narrowed as the object of all his problems spoke again.
"Oh, Backstreet Boys!" she repeated in a sing song voice.
The others gathered around Kevin, staring at the radio and then Kevin, their eyes asking whether they should answer or not. Kevin looked back at them with wide eyes, then he gave the radio to Howie. Howie looked at Kevin, realizing that he was to be of no help. Howie hesitantly answered.
"Yes?"
"Why, Howie Dorough! I was expecting Mr. Richardson!" They could hear her laughing, then she continued, "No matter, I have just decided to inform you that you are fulfilling your purpose and entertaining me wonderfully! I also would like to tell you that you have a package waiting for you. Its a large box hidden in a group of rocks on the river bank, its supplies that I believe you need for the rest of the trip. The river is about a half a mile from your currant position. Well, that's all folks! Toodles!" They all heard more laughing and then silence.
"Well, she sure sounded chipper," AJ angrily mumbled.
Howie looked again at Kevin, seeing anger in his eyes. "Well?" Howie asked Kevin. Kevin stared blankly back at him, the anger gone, "Well, what?"
Howie sighed, "Nothing. I guess we go get our package."
The boys made their way through the trees and other obstacles in their path, soon coming to a fast moving river. They stopped on the rocky bank, searching for this so called package.
Brian saw something to their right, it looked like a box. "Hey, guys! I see it, its over there!" he yelled, pointing at the object.
They all went to the object and could see that it was a large box, the package they were supposed to receive.
Howie again looked to Kevin, who had said very little the whole day. He was getting worried, this wasn't like Kevin. Kevin should be guiding us. Its how our friendship works, we rely on him. Maybe, sometimes, too much. But he's our big brother, that's what you expect from big brothers. They help you out with stuff you can't handle. Damnit! We need OUR Kevin back. Its just not right!
"What do you think, Kevin?" he asked, hoping, no... 'praying' Kevin'd say something like he used to.
Kevin shrugged, his gaze switching to the rapid river.
Howie shook his head and sighed, looking at the rest of the guys. Brian and AJ shrugged, they didn't understand it either. Nick looked around, confused by everything. He didn't hear the previous talk with Kevin, he didn't notice Kevin's insistence of walking during the night, he didn't understand the way Kevin was acting. He missed Kevin's reassuring voice, saying its all right and that he could handle it, that he'll help them through it. His silence left Nick feeling insecure, Kevin always helped them out and showed them the right thing to do.
Howie opened the box. There wasn't much in it, but definitely stuff they needed. A first aid kit for one. Howie glanced at Nick, the aspirin would definitely help his headache. The other things of great significance, was a fishing pole and a small cooler which when opened revealed some food. They also found three canteens, a backpack, and a box of matches. Seeing all this made them realize how thirsty and hungry they were. They haven't eaten since just before they were taken from the bus. That was a little over a day and a half ago.
"Well," said Brian, "I think its safe to say that she doesn't want us to die of hunger or thirst. I wonder what awaits us when we reach that cabin?"
"Right now I don't really care!" cried AJ, anxiously looking over the food, "Maybe, by some miracle, there's some McD's food in here!"
They laughed as AJ began to rummage through the food for his miracle. Kevin just shook his head. Lord, AJ and McDonald's! He'd be on his death bed and he'd ask for a McDonald's burger and fries for his last meal! The word 'death' stuck in Kevin's head and caused him to wince. Jeez! I almost killed my friends! Because of something 'I' decided to do. I'll let them make the decisions from now on, just as I have been. They seem to be doing fine, so I was right. They are better off without me here. Kevin then noticed Nick throwing these looks at him, looks that were looking to him, asking for what Kevin used to give him. Security. Kevin mentally shook himself, Nick didn't need him nor did the others. They were doing fine without him.
Just then Howie spoke, "Hey, we should probably save the packaged food and go fishing for some food. This might be all the food she'll give us."
They all nodded, then Nick asked, "So... who's going to fish? There's only one fishing pole."
"I'll do it."
They all turned to Kevin who was reaching into the box for the pole. They hadn't expected him to do it since he was acting... different. Kevin looked at them, "What?"
"Nothing," said Howie, shaking his head. He was so confused by Kevin's behavior.
Kevin picked up the fishing pole and then began to walk to the river. He stopped at Nick's voice, "Hey, Kev! Can I come with ya?"
Kevin stood for a moment and then nodded his head, watching as Nick ran up to him. He then turned back and resumed his walk to the river, Nick at his side. The others watched them go and then filled the canteens, organized the items that were in the box, and put them into the backpack. They then sat on the rocky beach and watched Kevin and Nick in the distance by the edge of the raging river for a little while before turning their attention elsewhere.
~/~/~/~/~()~~~~~
Kevin glanced at Nick standing beside him, he had wanted to do this by himself. He wanted to get away from the others to think, his guilt made it difficult to be around them. But when Nick had asked him... he had a ring to his voice that Kevin couldn't say no to. So Kevin chose to ignore Nick beside him and concentrate on catching fish. After a while, Kevin had caught 4 good sized fish. He was glad they were having such good luck, then Nick couldn't stay silent any longer.
"Kev, what's wrong?"
Kevin froze momentarily, then answered, "Wrong? Nothin's wrong."
"Kevin."
The tone of Nick's voice caused Kevin to look at Nick, it was a tone HE used when he wanted an answer now, no beating around the bush allowed. This was something different, the tone was being used on HIM.
"Nick, there's nothing wrong."
"Yeah, right. That's why you're acting like you don't care about anything," said Nick, staring Kevin in the eyes and crossing his arms.
Kevin stuttered, "I- I care..."
"Well, you sure don't act like it," countered Nick, "I don't know what the others seem to know, but you are acting like someone who doesn't care what's happening. Its like you've given up, Kev." Nick's stare turned pleading, "You haven't given up, have you, Kevin?"
That hit Kevin hard, "No, Nick. I haven't given up. We'll beat this and that woman, I swear it... on my life, I swear it."
"Then what is it?!" cried Nick exasperated, unfolding his arms and throwing them out. "Why haven't you done anything? You always know what to do, why aren't you helping us? You are always-... always there to help and you give help even if we don't want it. Now its like your here, but your not here. Kevi-" Nick broke off, his voice beginning to crack. Kevin stared wide-eyed. Nick took a steadying breath and continued, "Kevin, its like you aren't here. You give us-... you give 'me' confidence when you 'are' here. With the way you are now, its like... like... ...God, I can't explain it... Its like- our group is incomplete. You're missing, Kev. Who you are to us as a friend is missing. Why have you changed all of a sudden?"
Kevin was at a loss. He stood there with Nick staring at him with searching blue eyes, wanting the answer. God, when did Nick grow up?
"Nick... I can't, I just can't help the way I used to. All I do is end up hurting you and the others."
Nick's expression turned to shock, "Hurt us? You could never hurt us. What the hell made you think that?"
"Nick, I made the decision to keep walking at night. We couldn't see where we were going and I still made you all walk on. It ended up with you, Brian, and Howie falling down with that landslide. Nick... you could of been killed, all of you could have, because of MY decision. It was all MY fault. I won't make that mistake again. So, I won't dictate what we do. I can't hold the responsibility, you're all better off without me."
"You've got to be kiddin' me!" Nick cried, not believing Kevin could be overtaken with guilt. "Kev, that was an 'accident', nothing more. How do you know if we could of seen the landslide in daylight? I mean, yeah, NOW we know what a landslide is, but we wouldn't know what one looked like if it bit us in the ass. We're not exactly what you call 'wilderness people', Kev."
Kevin had to smile at that. Nick continued, "And as far as being better off without you... Are you nuts?! Kevin, you are our friend. We need you, just like you need us. We are each better because of you and vice versa. Do you understand what I'm sayin'?"
Kevin looked at Nick. I mean 'really' looked at Nick, "Jeez, kid, when'd you get so damn intuitive?"
Nick just smiled, "You didn't answer the question."
Kevin smiled, he couldn't even mislead the kid, "Yeah, I hear ya, Nick," Kevin took a deep breath, going over what Nick had said. "I hear ya," he breathed.
Nick raised an eyebrow, "There's something else."
Kevin looked up into the blue sky, shaking his head. "Yeah," he sighed, then looked Nick in the eyes, "Nick, do you know what made me push the night walk?" Nick shook his head. "I wanted to get at that woman as fast as I could. I wanted to make her pay for what she was puttin' us through." Kevin closed his eyes, ashamed, "I wanted revenge, Nick."
This half surprised Nick, half didn't. He knew how protective Kevin was of them. "I can understand that." Kevin opened his eyes and stared at Nick, doubtful. "Yes, I 'can' understand that. You are very protective of us, Kevin. I mean, we describe you to people as our older brother or a father figure. Brothers and fathers are protective of their family, therefore, so are you."
Kevin slowly nodded his head, what Nick said making sense. Kevin felt the guilt lift away after this talk with Nick. Kevin clapped Nick on the back, "You've really grown up, Nick. I'm proud of ya."
Nick positively beamed, "Thanks, are you back to normal now?"
Kevin laughed, "Yeah, I'll be bossin' you around before you know it."
"I can't believe I'm sayin' this, but... I can't wait," Nick laughed, looking at the river. He noticed that Kevin's line was tangled on a rock. "Hey, Kev. Your line's caught."
Kevin looked and noticed it, "Aw, damn it! This is our only line and hook."
"Hey, don't sweat it. I'll take care of it." Before Kevin could stop him, Nick had made it halfway into the streaming river, hopping from rock to rock. Kevin felt his heart jump to his throat, "Dear God, Nick! What the hell do you think you're doin'?!"
Nick called back while balancing precariously on a water slick rock, "I'll get the line, Kev! We can't afford to lose it!"
Kevin threw the pole on the ground and stepped into the cold river water, planning on grabbing Nick and getting him the hell out of there before he fell. The river tugged at his legs as he waded through it, making his way to Nick. He was almost there when Nick slipped, "Kev!" he cried, falling into the raging river.
"NICK!" Kevin cried, leaping forward and grabbing at Nick's falling form. He felt his fingers close around Nick's wrist and held fast, the river beginning to sweep both of them away. "Nick! I'm going to get you to that rock near shore! Think you can grab it?!" Kevin yelled over the roaring river. Nick nodded, panic in his eyes. "OK! Here we go!"
Kevin swam his hardest to the shore and rock, once close enough, he shoved Nick with all his might to the rock. Nick managed to get a hold of it after slamming into it with a grunt. He turned around for Kevin, but saw the river pulling him away.
"Kev!" Nick cried, reaching for his friend, but the river had already taken him too far away. Nick could only watch helplessly as Kevin was swept away...
Seven Days by Refuse
