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Chapter 161

A million stars glittered above Nick’s head, their brightness juxtaposed against the inky black of the night sky. A cool breeze ruffled his hair, leaving the smell of sea salt in its wake, and he thought to himself, This is the life. Thanksgiving night, lying out on the beach, belly full of turkey, head void of worries. Such contentment didn’t come his way often.

Especially not when he was in the presence of his family.

At least, not usually. But it was different now. Ever since his parents’ divorce, things had been more peaceful within the Carter clan, less bitter and resentful and divided. There was still a divide, of course – Nick couldn’t exactly remember the last time he’d spoken to his mother, and as Leslie was still living with her, it had been awhile since he’d seen his middle sister too. The last time he’d checked, BJ was living with a boyfriend in California, keeping her distance from the rest of the family. But at least he’d grown closer to his father and the twins again.

Though now practically adults themselves, Aaron and Angel still spent most of their time in the Florida Keys, which Bob Carter had called home for years. Nick couldn’t blame them for wanting to stick around; in his mind, there was no place better than the Keys. It hadn’t taken much for him to decide to come down for Thanksgiving. With Jane out of the picture, he could actually enjoy the holiday with his real family again. Not his whole family, mind you… but half a family was better than none at all. Especially when it was the half that didn’t tend to erupt in fights across the dinner table or pass out face down in the gravy bowl from too much booze.

Thanksgiving this year had actually been pleasant, and he was relieved. Even though she had family issues of her own, he hadn’t wanted Laureen to witness the typical dysfunctional Carter holiday of years past.

Glancing over at her, he smiled. She looked totally relaxed herself – asleep, in fact. Stretched out in a chaise lounge beside him, she had her arms folded behind her head, her ankles crossed, her eyes closed, and a hint of a smile upon her lips. He couldn’t tell if she was really sleeping or not, but she looked cute either way. He was glad he had brought her.

He had never really intended to, until it became apparent that Laureen had no intention of going back to Chicago for Thanksgiving, having been there just a month ago, and that she also had no family in Tampa to celebrate it with. He had no one either, and so, it had just sort of happened – he’d decided to go to the Keys, and he’d invited her to come with him.

Aaron had immediately welcomed her, while Angel had been skeptical at first – but that was typical. Angel was always suspicious of his girlfriends, and for good reason – he’d certainly dated enough rotten ones. But Laureen’s genuineness had shone right through, and once they’d warmed up to each other, she and Angel had gotten along well.

They’d had a good conversation over dinner, a normal, civil conversation for once, which was nice. But after a full day of family, Nick was secretly glad his brother and sister were inside the house, leaving him and Laureen to some peace and privacy out on the beach. Not that anything had happened… but he certainly wasn’t against the idea. He was still testing the waters with Laureen, and like the sea in a storm, there was no predicting where fate might take them. He never would have seen himself with Laureen, but at this point, he was open to anything.

The thought made him smile again, and he sighed as he adjusted his weight on the chaise lounge, gazing up at the sky, as vast and endless as the possibilities.

Their silence and solitude was broken when a distant screen glass door slid open, casting a small rectangle of light onto the shadowy sand, and Aaron’s voice bellowed out to the beach, “Yo, Nick!!”

Groaning, Nick sat up, twisting with difficulty to squint up at the house. “What?!” he shouted back, annoyed at the disruption.

Aaron’s voice drifted back to him. “Who’s got your shitty-ass ‘Bad Boy’ song on their cell phone??”

“What??”

“If you want it to be good, girl, get yourself a… bad boy!” Aaron screeched, in a painful, yet dead-on impression, his shrill voice carrying in the breeze, probably killing manatees across the gulf coast.

Before Nick could yell at him to shut up, Laureen sat bolt upright and exclaimed, “Oh! That’s mine!”

She scrambled out of her chair and tore up to the house, leaving Nick to stare after her, befuddled as to why anyone would choose that song as their ringtone. It had to have been a joke. He would tease her later.

He stayed put in his lounge chair and waited for her to come back, making himself snicker with the memories of how god-awfully bad that song had been and thinking that, when he heard the screen door open again, he might call up to her and ask her to bring down a couple of Coronas. He would go get one himself, but the walk back through the sand and up to the house was a long one, and the turkey had made him lazy. He was content to stay where he was and wait for Laureen.

He expected her to be gone a lot longer than she was, so it surprised him when he heard the screen door bang open again a few minutes later. Craning his neck, he looked to see Laureen flying down the steps of the deck (no Coronas in hand). She was moving much too fast than someone should after a huge Thanksgiving dinner, he thought, but it didn’t occur to him that anything could be wrong…

… Not until she got close, and he saw the look on her face in the silvery moonlight.

“What’s up?” he asked, frowning at her in bewilderment. “Who was on the phone?”

Laureen was out of breath. She leaned forward, putting her hands on her knees. “That was Dianna,” she gasped, “Claire’s friend.”

Nick’s stomach dropped. “Is something wrong with Claire?”

“She’s at the hospital in Tampa,” said Laureen, her eyes wide. “She’s in labor.”

“Labor?!” Nick exclaimed. “But… it’s way too soon, isn’t it? She’s not supposed to have those babies till next year!”

“I know.” Even in the darkness, Laureen’s face looked paler than usual. “Dianna said that Jamie called her and said Claire’s in preterm labor, and they’re trying to stop it, but if they can’t, the babies will have to be born, and they’re too little… they’re too little to survive.”

Nick took a moment to process this. It was almost unbelievable to think that while he was down her enjoying himself in paradise, Claire could be up in Tampa, her dreams crumbling around her. “Oh my god,” he murmured, raking a hand through his hair. He sat there for a moment, trying to collect his thoughts, and then he decided he couldn’t sit there any longer. Looking back up, he said, “I wanna go back.”

Laureen watched him warily. “Now?”

“Yeah.” He stood up, shaking his head, and added, “I just can’t stand to sit down here and worry about her. I wanna go up there… I know her family will be with her, but I just feel like she’s alone, you know? She shouldn’t be alone…”

He didn’t know if he was even making sense; his thoughts were a jumbled mess. All that was clear to him was that he had to get to Tampa, tonight.

A different girl might have put up a fuss about being dragged out of Marathon in the middle of the night, on Thanksgiving. But not Laureen. “I’m with you,” was all she said, and they started up to the house together, Nick cursing his leg as he slipped and tripped in the sand, pushing himself to move faster.

They packed and said goodbye to Bob and Aaron in record time, while Angel graciously offered to drive them to the small Marathon airport. “I hope Claire and her babies will be okay,” she offered awkwardly, when she hugged Nick goodbye outside the terminal.

“Thanks,” Nick murmured, her words seeming to wash right over his head.

He wouldn’t remember even doing it later, but somehow he managed to book two seats on a charter flight to St. Petersburg, the closest he could get to Tampa, and an hour later, he and Laureen were jetting up the Florida coastline on the little puddle-jumper. Normally, Nick hated small planes, terrified by the turbulence that accompanied them, but tonight, he didn’t notice it as much. If anything, all of the bouncing and shuddering seemed to fit his state of mind. His thoughts were creating so much turbulence inside his head that it sort of balanced out.

Still, he was glad when they finally landed at the airport in St. Petersburg. He wasted no time in hailing a cab to drive Laureen and him to Tampa. Though he didn’t realize it, the taxi sped them along the same route Claire had taken to the hospital just a few hours earlier.

***

It was midnight. The witching hour, thought Claire with an odd chill, staring up at the wall clock in her hospital room. She’d been watching that clock like a hawk for the past few hours, timing her contractions, once she’d realized that’s what they were. They had been coming every ten minutes… but in the last hour, they’d slowed, only one every twenty. She was hoping and praying that this meant the drugs were working; her labor was stopping. But she didn’t know.

The lack of answers was driving her crazy. Why? she kept asking herself. Why had this happened? Why had she suddenly gone into labor, when she wasn’t even through her second trimester yet? Had she done something wrong? She knew her pregnancy was a high-risk one, both because she was carrying more than one baby and because of her heart damage. But Dr. Valerio hadn’t said anything about her heart, or given her any other explanation. The doctor had been in and out all night, checking on her often, but until now, Claire had been so caught up in panic that she hadn’t stopped to ask.

Like a true sister, Amber had stayed at her bedside all night, comforting her, bringing her ice chips, squeezing her hand through the contractions. Jamie had been there too, but ever since he’d left to call Dianna, he had been in and out of the room, with only vague, mumbled excuses as to where he was going. Claire didn’t pry; she expected it was all just too much for him. She wasn’t surprised. She would have liked to leave too, to up and bail on the body that had betrayed her once again, trying to force her twins out of it too soon.

The thought made her want to cry. She felt guilty, guilty about everything. Guilty about things she couldn’t control – like this – as well as guilty about things she could – like hurting Nick. Combined with a set of hormones that were in overdrive and the terror over realizing she was in labor, the guilt had pushed her over the edge. She was an emotional wreck. She felt like a pane of glass that had splintered into a million cracks, but not yet fallen into shards. One more strike, even the slightest tap, and she would shatter to pieces.

Dr. Valerio was the one with the power to shatter or mend, and when she came in at five after the hour, Claire sucked in a deep breath, thinking that this had to be the moment of truth. Either the doctor was going to confirm her hopes that the slowing contractions were a good sign, and that her labor was stopping… or she was going to find that it was too late. At least that’s what she feared.

“How are your contractions?” asked Dr. Valerio, as she dropped onto the rolling stool she used for examinations.

Used to the drill by now, Claire eased her feet into the stirrups. “They’re getting better,” she answered hopefully. “They’ve been coming about twenty minutes apart, instead of ten. And it seems like they’re not as strong as before.” That last part might have just been wishful thinking; she wasn’t sure. The original contractions hadn’t been all that strong to begin with.

Dr. Valerio gave a short nod. “That’s a good sign. Let’s see what’s going on down here…”

Claire bit down on her bottom lip and gripped Jamie’s hand tightly as Dr. Valerio examined her, waiting in suspense to hear the verdict.

“Well…” said the doctor slowly, “the bad news is that your cervix is dilated to five centimeters, which is halfway to the point when women typically deliver. The good news is that you were at five centimeters the last two times I checked, which means your labor hasn’t seemed to progress any since. Hopefully, this means that the magnesium sulfate is working.”

“Thank god,” Claire exhaled softly.

“This is a good sign,” Dr. Valerio nodded, but her expression was still guarded. “However, you’re not in the clear yet. Preterm labor is likely to recur, sometimes as soon as forty-eight hours later. We’re going to need to keep you in the hospital for close observation for a few days at least… although given your medical history and the specifics of your pregnancy, it will probably be longer. I definitely want you to stay on complete bed rest here in the hospital for the next couple of days… after that, we’ll see.”

“Okay,” Claire nodded her agreement quickly. At that moment, she didn’t care what she had to do, as long as her babies would be safe.

“Is there anything we can do?” spoke up Jamie, who had been very silent. “To make sure this doesn’t happen again, I mean?”

Claire glanced at him briefly, then at Dr. Valerio. It was the same thing she had been wondering. What caused such a thing to happen?

Seeming hesitant, Dr. Valerio shook her head. “Unfortunately, in most cases we can’t determine what causes a woman to go into labor this early, especially in a pregnancy with two seemingly healthy babies. Having twins or multiples does increase the risk of preterm labor, but to have it happen at twenty-three weeks is still a rarity. It’s nothing you should feel guilty over, Claire. You didn’t do anything wrong, and there’s really nothing you could have done to prevent this. You did you and your babies a favor by getting to the hospital as quickly as you did. It’s easiest to stop labor in the early stages; once it progresses to a certain point, there’s no turning back.”

Claire nodded her understanding, her acknowledgement that she was not to blame. But really, she understood nothing. What was there to understand? The way Dr. Valerio made it sound, this had been a fluke, a freak chance event that had occurred and could happen again at any time. It scared her to death, the realization that there was really no rhyme or reason to it. Why her? Why now? There was no good explanation, and that was frustrating.

But at least, for now, it seemed the worst was over. The labor was slowing… the babies were okay. And as this sunk in, her relief was overpowering. Once Dr. Valerio left, Jamie pulled her into a ginger, yet emotional hug, and tears filled her eyes again. This time, they were good tears, tears of relief, tears of emotional exhaustion from the ordeal she had just endured. They could only hope that it was really over.

“You should go home, Amber,” Claire said after awhile, once they’d all had a chance to breathe a sigh of relief. “It’s late, and there’s really no reason to stay. I’m alright… and Jamie’s here.”

Jamie nodded. “I’m staying. You should go and get some sleep.”

“Okay,” Amber agreed reluctantly, “but if you need anything, just call the house. You know Kyle or I won’t hesitate to come back. And we’ll be back tomorrow for sure.”

Claire managed an appreciative smile. “Thanks,” she said, opening her arms to hug her sister-in-law. She and Amber had always gotten along well, but she had a feeling that after the scare and the heart-to-heart they’d shared tonight, they would be even more like sisters from now on.

Amber left, and with her went the conversation. Jamie didn’t have much to say, which drove Claire nuts – she hated silence when she was trying to take her mind off something. But after several attempts at making random conversation, Claire realized her efforts were in vain – Jamie just didn’t feel like talking. He was the type who couldn’t pretend like everything was alright when it wasn’t, while Claire had that charade perfected. Sometimes, it was the only way she could cope in situations like this. She hated just lying here… waiting… worrying… thinking too much.

And Jamie almost made it worse when he was acting the way he was now, looking over at her every few seconds and then quickly looking away when she tried to meet his gaze. She could feel his eyes on her, and it pissed her off. He treated her like glass, like she was about to break at any second, and yet, he didn’t hesitate to hurl her against the wall and let her shatter when the going got rough. That was, in essence, what he had done when he’d abandoned her in the middle of her abortion.

She turned toward him, frowning as the memory of that horrible September day came back to her, and all of a sudden, she wanted very much just to be alone. “Hey… maybe you should go call Dianna,” she suggested dully. “I mean, now that we know something. She’s probably wondering about me.”

Jamie nodded. “Good idea.” He started to pull out his cell phone, but she held up her hand.

“You’re not supposed to use that in here. Go out in the hall and call her. I… I kind of feel like sleeping anyway.”

He looked at her strangely. “Really? I don’t think I can sleep at all.”

She just shrugged. “I’m just really tired. My body’s exhausted… I’m emotionally drained… I think I’ll feel better after some sleep.”

Jamie nodded. “Alright. Well, try and sleep then. I’ll go call Di, and I’ll be back to check on you in a few minutes.”

Don’t bother, she thought, barely acknowledging him as she rolled slowly onto her side, curling herself into a ball beneath the covers. There, she ran her hand gingerly over her belly and waited until she heard him leave. When the door finally closed with a quiet click, she sighed.

***

“You know, I’ve lived in Tampa for, like, three-and-a-half years now, and I’ve never been to this hospital,” Laureen mused as the taxi pulled up in front of the main entrance of Tampa General.

Nick cast her a dark look as he fished a wad of bills out of his wallet. “Consider yourself lucky.”

He paid the cabbie, tipping extra for the speed in which he’d gotten them there, and climbed out. Laureen followed closely behind as he led the way into the hospital that was all-too-familiar to him.

They stopped at the main desk, and Nick said, “We’re looking for a patient, Claire Ryan.”

“Turner,” hissed Laureen, and Nick reddened.

“Turner,” he corrected, wondering how he could have forgotten. “Claire Turner.”

The receptionist’s eyes narrowed at him. “Are you sure about that?”

“Yes, I’m sure,” Nick said firmly, staring evenly at her. “But we’re not sure of her room number or anything. She might be on the maternity floor, but… I don’t know. She was in labor though.”

“She’s probably in labor and delivery then,” the receptionist said curtly. “Are you family?”

“Yes,” answer Nick without hesitation. He put his arm around Laureen, nudging her forward, and added, “This is her sister. I’m her brother-in-law. We just came in from out of town.”

He prayed Laureen wouldn’t giggle and give them away, but luckily, she didn’t. They were both too somber to laugh, even if it was sort of funny. Nick and Claire had posed as brother and sister before to see each other in the hospital, and no one was ever the wiser. He figured Laureen had a closer resemblance to her, though, with her auburn hair, so he’d be the brother-in-law this time.

Sure enough, the woman at the desk looked up Claire’s room number on her computer and gave it to them without any trouble. “She’s in room 214.”

“Thank you,” said Nick and quickly led Laureen toward the bank of elevators. They caught one up to the second floor and started down the hall of the maternity ward, checking room numbers as they went.

They got as far as room 208, and then they came to a small waiting area with a couch, some chairs, a TV, and plenty of magazines. Glancing into the room as they started to walk by, Nick saw that the TV was off, and there was only one person inside. Slumped in one of the chairs, he had his head down and a cell phone to his ear, but Nick recognized the dark, curly hair. Stiffening, he stopped and stood there for a few seconds, staring in at Jamie. When Jamie took no notice of him or Laureen, Nick cleared his throat.

Finally, Jamie looked up.

***