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Chapter 170

For Claire, the weeks after Nick left passed as slowly as every week since Christmas had. But at least now, there were distractions, pleasant interruptions.

First, there was the baby shower. Dianna had planned it to perfection, and it went off without a hitch right in Claire’s condo. Dianna came over early to decorate the condo with crepe paper streamers and balloons and table cloths all in soft baby blue and green, to go with the turtle-themed nursery Claire had put together. When the other girls arrived, there were hors d'oeuvres and games and, of course, gifts. By the time the party was over, Claire had acquired a beautiful, pale green twin stroller, a pair of turtle mobiles, a baby monitor, and a variety of toys, stuffed animals, blankets, and newborn clothes.

The shower and the support from all of her closest friends and family made her happy, though whenever she stopped to peer in at the nursery on her way back from the bathroom (a quite frequent occurrence), Claire grew overwhelmed. It made her smile with excitement to look into the beautiful room, with its rocking chair and changing table and two cribs, adorned with the blue and green turtle-printed bedding, their mobiles already hung. But when she stopped and realized that there were two of virtually everything, she began to think of all that babies required and wondered what she would do if she and Jamie didn’t make it. How would she ever raise twins on her own?

She knew that even if she never moved back to Iowa to be with Jamie, she wouldn’t be totally alone. She would stay here in Florida, and her family would help her with the babies. But still, the thought of going through parenthood without a husband to share it with, without Jamie, saddened her. And yet, she was still too proud to call him and ask him to come visit her. A part of her missed him… but she wasn’t quite ready to let him back in.

From the sound of things, he had enough to do in Iowa anyway. His job was keeping him busy, he always said when they talked, and Claire got the impression he had thrown himself into his work. He had already taken one business trip that month, and he was going to Denver for another near the end of the month.

“Denver in January; that’ll be fun,” Claire had joked over the phone.

“Eh, maybe I’ll get some skiing in. Sure can’t do that in Florida,” he’d replied. Then he’d added, on second thought, “But if you need me to come down for any reason, I can…”

“I’m doing fine,” Claire had answered. “Have fun on your trip, and maybe I’ll see you after you get back.”

It was an empty promise, just said to close the conversation. Jamie prepared for his business trip, and Claire went about her own business without him as she’d been doing all month, going to prenatal checkups, scrapbooking pictures from the baby shower, and talking to other expectant moms she’d met on one of the support forums she’d been visiting online.

Amidst all of that, Laureen, who had been visiting more frequently since Nick had left, came to Claire with the idea of throwing Nick a birthday party.

“He said he’s going to be home for a few days for his birthday, before his tour kicks off. I want to have a surprise party for him, something big and elaborate and really cool,” Laureen explained eagerly. “But the thing is, I don’t know what I’m doing. I’ve never planned a big, cool party for a famous person before.”

“I haven’t either, but you know, Howie lives in Orlando… maybe he could help you with all the arrangements,” Claire suggested.

Laureen positively beamed. “You read my mind. I would love it if all the guys could be there, and he would be just the person to help me pull that off. Do you have his number?”

“As a matter of fact, I do…” Claire had had both Howie’s and AJ’s numbers since the “good old days” Nick had referred to, when the two of them had been living with him and the flash of their names on her cell phone had made her stomach lurch with the fear that Nick was sick or hurt or had gone off the deep end. That experience, the ordeal they’d all gone through with Nick, had given them a sort of bond, and Claire had no doubt that Howie would help give Nick a 29th birthday to remember.

She put Laureen in touch with him, and plans for the party took off from there.

Claire felt removed from most of it. She wouldn’t even be able to go to the party, unless someone wanted to wheel her there on a stretcher, but she offered to help however she could. And to her surprise, Laureen thought of something she could do.

“You can babysit!”

“Babysit Baylee?” That would be fun, thought Claire. She and Nick had babysat Brian’s son once before, when he was a baby. But he was a lot older now. She wasn’t sure how good of a babysitter she’d be if she was stuck in bed…

“No, babysit Nick! The club that Howie rented for the party is gonna let us in to decorate the night before. That way, I can spend all day with Nick on his birthday, and he won’t suspect anything. So I thought maybe he could hang out with you the night before, while we’re getting stuff set up. Can you call him and insist that he comes over?”

Claire laughed. “Sure. I’ll just say my parents are going out of town and want someone to stay with me, just in case – he knows my mom, so he’ll have no problem believing that. Dianna and Todd will have plans that night, and you…”

“I’ll fake sick!” Laureen burst excitedly. “I’ll pretend I’m getting a cold and don’t want to get you sick. Or him, for that matter. Then you can keep him at your place, and I’ll go decorate.”

“Sounds like a plan!”

***

The “plan” went into effect two days before Nick’s birthday.

Explaining what Laureen needed, Claire had convinced her parents to drive to Sarasota for the night. “It’s only an hour away, just far enough to make Nick need to stay for awhile. You guys can have a nice dinner out, see a movie or a play or the symphony or something, and come back late. Nick and I will be fine here,” she had assured them. She couldn’t believe that at twenty-eight, she was trying to convince her parents to go out of town and leave her home “alone,” but, the situation being what it was, here she was. Thankfully, her mother fought against her overprotective nature and agreed, and Claire picked up the phone to call Nick.

He had just gotten home from Los Angeles that day, and she hadn’t seen him yet. As she speed-dialed his cell phone, she realized she was looking forward to spending the evening with him. She’d be able to ask him how his tour rehearsals had gone and give him his birthday present a day early, since she wouldn’t be able to attend the big party.

Nick picked up after a couple of rings with a cheerful, “Hey!”

“Hey yourself! What’s goin’ on?”

“Mm, making up excuses not to unpack my stuff.”

Claire laughed. “Why bother? Aren’t you leaving again in a few days?”

“Yeah, but I need to do laundry.”

“Are you saying you brought a suitcase full of dirty clothes home from LA?”

“Maybe…”

“Why didn’t you just wash them there? Weren’t you staying at your house out there?”

“Yeah…”

“So…?” Claire prompted, laughing.

“Shut up; I hate doing laundry,” Nick huffed exaggeratedly. “Enough about me and my dirty clothes. What’s up with you?”

“The ceiling? That’s about all I have to look at when I’m lying flat on my back in bed.”

“Don’t I know it,” Nick chuckled. “So nothin’ new, huh? The little squirts still alive and kicking in there?”

“Oh yes… kicking hard,” Claire emphasized, smiling. The twins had seemed especially restless lately, but she welcomed the squirming and kicking, even when it made her back, stomach, and ribs ache, because the movement meant the babies were alive, and she could reassure herself that everything was as it should be. “I think Jamie’s right… they’re gonna take after their daddy and be soccer players.”

Nick chuckled. “Well, let’s hope they get their personality from mommy then.”

Claire felt a broad smile stretching across her face at the compliment (or the dig at Jamie, whichever it was intended to be). “Thanks. So hey, I have a question for you. Actually, it’s more of a favor…”

“Anything. Just name it,” Nick agreed easily.

“You wanna come over and hang out with me tomorrow night? My parents have tickets for the symphony in Sarasota, and they won’t go unless I have someone to stay here with me. You know how my mom is; she won’t leave me alone for more than a few minutes. Drives me nuts, but with everything that could go wrong, I guess I can’t blame her. Anyway, I would just call Dianna for a girls’ night in, but I know she’s already got plans with Todd, and Laureen said she thinks she’s getting a cold, so…”

“Yeah, she did say she wasn’t feeling well,” Nick interjected. “But hey, absolutely, I’d love to come hang out. I haven’t seen you in a couple weeks.”

“You just wanna see how much fatter I’ve gotten since you left,” Claire teased. “Trust me, I look like one of the walruses at Sea World; no need to gawk.”

Nick laughed. “Well, I think pregnancy suits you. So when should I come over?”

The off-handed compliment made her blush, which surprised her. Smiling awkwardly, she collected her thoughts and replied, “Why don’t you come about five, and we can order some food. Does that sound okay?”

“Sure. I’ll see ya then. I’ll bring some movies and ice cream too.”

“You know me too well,” Claire beamed, loving him for that. “Thanks, Nick. I’ll see ya tomorrow night.”

Ending the call, Claire plugged her phone back into its charger and relaxed against her pillows, her eyes traveling back up to the ceiling. Just talking to him had made her happy, almost giddy for some reason. He was always so sweet and too good to her, better than she deserved. But then, everything did seem better when he was around. It always had. That was what had made her realize she loved him in the first place. It was what had made her start loving him.

The sad realization now was, despite the fact that she was married and he was dating someone else, she had never stopped.

***

The following evening, Nick showed up at Claire’s door, armed with two different flavors of ice cream and three DVDs. After traveling and two weeks of rehearsals, he was looking forward to a quiet night in.

Claire’s father Kris answered the door; he and her mother were on their way out. “Come on in, Nick,” said Kris with a smile, stepping back to hold the door for him. “Claire will be glad to see you; maybe you can help take her mind off things. It’s been a rough day for her.”

“Really?” Nick cocked his head in concern. “What’s been going on?” Claire had sounded fine when she’d called him yesterday.

“She’s just achy. You know, her back and everything. Can’t get comfortable. Typical stuff. She never complains, but I can tell the grandkids are giving her hell today.” He offered a stiff-lipped smile.

Carrie looked wary, and, touching Nick’s arm, she said, “Just make sure she takes it easy, Nick, and don’t hesitate to call us if anything seems off. I’m probably just paranoid, but I worry about her.”

Nick nodded at Claire’s mother, offering her an understanding smile. “Sure. We’ll take it easy. You guys enjoy the symphony.”

Kris turned to Carrie, smiling. “Oh, I know this one will. She’s the one who got us the tickets. Come on, honey, we better get going.”

Nick told them goodbye and heard them leave as he walked into the kitchen to put the ice cream away. He crammed the two cartons in the freezer and then headed for the master bedroom. The door was ajar, but he rapped his knuckles against the frame anyway before poking his head in. “Knock, knock.”

Claire was in bed, lying propped against many pillows on top of the covers. When she saw him, she smiled and beckoned him in. “Hey, Nick,” she said and patted the empty side of the bed.

He came in and sat down, smiling back at her. “Hey, how ya doin?”

“Ugh… honestly? I’m all achy and crampy. I’ve been getting those Braxton-Hicks contractions, and I know they’re nothing to worry about cause I asked my doctor about them last time I saw her, but they’re a pain in the ass.”

Nick knew only vaguely what she was talking about, but nodded, trying to look understanding. “Anything I can do?”

She shrugged her shoulders and offered him her hand. “Just talk to me.”

Taking her hand, he gave it a squeeze and smiled. “Okay. What should we talk about?”

“Tell me about your rehearsals. Is the tour shaping up to be a good one?”

“I hope so,” said Nick and told her a little bit about what the show was going to be like. “I can’t give away everything though. Gotta leave some surprises for when you come and see it.”

Claire smiled, but shook her head. “Aww honey, I’d love to come see you, but I don’t know if I’m going to be able to. How long are you gonna be touring?”

“February and March.”

“Well, my official due date is March 26… so unless I go early, I’m going to be either still pregnant or recovering from a C-section by the time the tour’s over,” Claire said regretfully.

“You have to have a C-section?” asked Nick, feeling his stomach flip-flop.

“Yeah… they tell me it’s too risky the other way. Too much pushing. I’m not too worried about it though. Okay, I’m terrified, but… at least I don’t have to worry about forcing a couple of heads out of a small hole. They’ll make a big hole and just pull them right out for me.”

Nick squeezed his eyes shut, grimacing. “Okay, let’s change the subject.”

“Oh, don’t tell me you’re squeamish now,” Claire teased, poking him in the side. “You better not be like that when you’ve got a wife birthing your babies.”

His eyes opened again, taking in the sight of her, her amused expression peeking over her rounded belly. Her words sounded strange to him, and he realized that, even now, when he thought of a wife, the mother of his children, the only woman he could picture… was her.

Upon that realization, he quickly looked away, somehow afraid that if she made eye contact with him, she’d be able to look right into his mind and read that thought. He tried to hide it, but there it was, the realization that she was still the only woman he’d ever really loved. And that included even Laureen, who he liked a lot but had never considered proposing to. He just couldn’t see himself making that kind of commitment to anyone… except the one he’d already committed himself to once.

Swallowing hard, he took a deep breath and tried his best to force that thought out of his brain. It wasn’t good to keep dwelling on the past; how could he ever expect to move forward that way? He’d only be cheating Laureen, and she deserved a fair chance. Maybe he didn’t love her now the way he had loved Claire, but that wasn’t to say he never would. He hadn’t always loved Claire like that either.

“Nick, are you okay?” Her voice cut into his thoughts. “I was just kidding. I’ll stop talking about it now; I know you don’t really want to hear all the gory details.”

She thought he really was just squeamish. Okay, he could handle that. “Thanks,” he said weakly, playing along.

“Men,” Claire said with an exasperated smile. “The human race would have died out a long time ago if you guys were expected to carry children.”

“Aww, I dunno about that. Give us some credit. Give me some credit at least. Labor pains can’t be any worse than phantom pains.” He touched the socket of his prosthesis gingerly, remembering the agonizing pain that had wrenched and twisted at the limb within it for months after the amputation. Just thinking about them brought a dull ache to his stump.

“Mm… well… I guess I can’t really judge that. We need to find a woman who’s lost a limb and had a baby and ask her. Do you have Heather Mills McCartney’s number?”

Nick chuckled. “Uh, no. Hey, how come half our conversations lately end up being a contest between which one of us has been through the worst shit?”

Claire laughed hard at that, snorting. “Cause I’ve been feeling sorry for myself lately and need you to give me a kick in the ass and remind me that you’ve been through worse shit than me.”

“Really? Does that mean I win the contest?”

“I think I already told you you did. But I’m a close first runner-up, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, that’s fair.”

All of a sudden, he caught her eye, and they both burst out laughing. “We are so weird,” Claire giggled. “Can you imagine the look on Laureen’s face if she could hear us?”

“Or Jamie’s?”

Claire snorted again. “Jamie! Talk about squeamish! Jamie would have fled the room by now.”

Nick snickered; that was so true.

“So, what movies did you bring?” asked Claire, changing the subject, her eyes on the short stack of DVDs sitting next to Nick on the bed.

“Gremlins… Beetlejuice…” Nick held up the DVDs as he listed their titles, “… and the latest Bond movie.”

“Bond… James Bond,” Claire quoted in a deep British accent.

“You wanna watch it?”

“Nah… let’s watch Beetlejuice. I haven’t seen that in forever.”

“Okay. Want me to order us a pizza or pop some popcorn or something?” Nick offered.

“You can if you want, but I don’t want anything. My stomach’s been kind of upset all day,” replied Claire with a grimace.

“Really? Hope you’re not getting the stomach flu.”

“Yuck, I hope not.”

Nick nixed the food for now and popped the DVD in, settling down next to Claire to watch. The bed was comfortable, and he easily relaxed against the pillows, but Claire was unusually fidgety. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched her shift her weight every few minutes, trying to find a suitable position.

“Are you okay?” he asked, twenty minutes into the movie.

“Yeah…” said Claire, making a face, “I just can’t get comfortable. My back and legs are killing me.”

Nick gave her a sympathetic look. “Could I rub your back? Would that help?” he offered.

She arched an eyebrow thoughtfully, and the corners of her mouth turned upwards. “It might…”

“Well, here, roll over on your side, and let’s give it a try.”

Claire scooted lower on the bed and turned so that she was lying on her side, curled into the fetal position, her back to Nick. He lay next to her, about a foot away from spooning her, and massaged her back as best he could. “Is it helping?” he asked as he kneaded her flesh, trying to be gentle and firm at the same time.

“A little. It feels really good,” she sighed.

Half-watching the movie, he made his way up and down her back, and he could feel her muscles start to relax beneath his fingertips. But every so often, she would tense up again, and he could tell she was in pain.

“Claire?” he asked, rubbing her shoulder. “Are you okay?”

“I’ll be fine,” she replied through gritted teeth. “It’s just a cramp… or a Braxton-Hicks… either way, it’ll be gone in a minute…”

Nick was disconcerted, but Claire didn’t seem too worried, so he kept rubbing her back until the cramp went away and didn’t push the issue.

Near the end of the movie, Claire said, “I’ll be right back,” and rolled carefully off the bed. She stood up slowly and sort of waddled into the bathroom, holding her belly. Watching her, Nick decided he didn’t envy women any; she was probably right about the human race going extinct if men were the ones expected to bear children.

He returned his attention back to the movie, but when the credits started to roll, he realized Claire wasn’t back yet. Frowning, he shut off the movie and got up from the bed, walking over to knock lightly on the closed bathroom door. “Claire?” he called in. “You alright?”

The door suddenly flew open, and there stood Claire, looking pale. “I think I just lost my mucus plug.”

Nick stared, confused and revolted at the same time. “Your what?”

“Don’t make me explain. Nick, I think I’m going into labor.”

***